Detective down
by rayrae118
Summary: Begins where the season 11 finale left off, with one change: Olivia, not Melinda, was the one who got shot. E/O!
1. Chapter 1

**I had this idea and I'm kinda just running with it. What if it had been Olivia, not Melinda, who was shot in the season 11 finale? First FF ever, not really sure if it's gonna be E/O right now. Please review, no flames, go easy on me =]**

**Disclaimer: haha, I wish! Well, I am a TV major, maybe in a few years…**

"Sophie, put the gun down." Olivia tried to reason with her. She was just a grief-stricken mother, right? But she was aiming a gun at Jo.

"No! You put yours down, or she will die!" Sophie shouted back.

"Sophie, please," Olivia tried to reason again. This was quickly turning ugly. They were just trying to get an unstable woman to admit to hiring a criminal to kidnap her son. Huang had suggested that seeing him in the morgue might snap her out of her delusions. Olivia chuckled internally; so much for _that_ idea.

"Do it!" Sophie screamed yet again.

Olivia looked at Jo. Could she risk it? She glanced at Sophie again, then back to Jo. What was that expression? Fear. That was it. Olivia was momentarily stunned. Had she ever seen Jo afraid? No. She was not willing to risk the ADA's life.

"Ok, Sophie. You win, all right?" Resigned, Olivia dropped the magazine, then the gun. "Let's just stay calm, OK?"

But Sophie was beyond reasoning with.

"Kick it to me! Now!" Sophie shrieked.

Olivia complied. Her main concern right now was getting everyone out alive and unharmed.

"Now, you all get out! Get out now!" Sophie pushed the uniformed officer towards the door. "All of you out!"

"No, I'm not going anywhere!" Sophie's husband Paul stepped forward threateningly. Sophie pushed Jo towards Paul. Taking her cue, Jo kept moving until she was behind Paul.

Olivia looked from Sophie to Paul. She could see this wasn't going to end well, and the worst thing was, she didn't know what to do to change that. She could plainly see that Paul wasn't helping the situation any, but she didn't know how to get him to shut up-after all, he was the grieving father to Sophie's grieving mother. Before she could try anything, Paul spoke again; Olivia stepped forward, ready to do anything she could to diffuse the situation.

"What is wrong with you?" Paul glared at his son's mother. "Have you gone completely insane?"

Olivia wanted to shoot Paul herself at this moment. Seriously, who in their right mind antagonizes the person with the gun? Looking back at Sophie, she knew the moment was coming. The look in her eyes was half past crazy. Reacting purely on instinct now, she let her decades of experience as a cop take over her body. She saw Sophie raise the gun slightly; with a quick step forward, she pushed Paul out of the way as a deafening BANG shook the room.

_So, what do you think? Should I continue? R&R please!_


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for the reviews! I'm soooo glad you guys like it! And yeah, I was so disappointed with that finale-why do we hardly ever get to see Olivia hurt? (I think) She's the only one who hasn't been shot yet, and I really wanted it to happen in this episode. I was really nervous about uploading a story. I really don't know where this story is going, but the idea has put down roots in my brain, and I'm just along for the ride.**

**I'll bet any other SVU fan could guess what I'm doing right now as I try to write this chapter—yup that's right: watching SVU! Kinda distracting, but what can I say: I'm obsessed. Although, I have to say I kind of feel like a L&O fraud, saying I'm an obsessed die-hard fan. I only got on the ship a couple of months ago—although I did watch 11 seasons in two and a half weeks (while keeping up with college work-during finals season, I might add), so I guess that counts as obsessed. **

**Disclaimer: yeah yeah, not mine. A girl can dream though.**

**And now back to the story…**

Olivia heard the shrieks, but it didn't quite register. She could feel the linoleum floor beneath her, cold and unforgiving. _What happened?_ She remembered the shot, but after that it was a blur. She could feel Melinda next to her, telling her something, but she couldn't quite make out what. She blinked and could make out the ceiling, fuzzy around the edges. At that moment she became aware of a sharp pain in her stomach. _God, that hurts. Shit, what the hell happened?_ Olivia tried to replay the last few minutes. _Sophie, gun. Paul. Shit_. It all came back in a flash.

"Mel," Olivia gasped. It was getting harder to breathe. She looked over to see Melinda kneeling next to her, lips moving. Glancing down briefly, Olivia could see Melinda's hands on her stomach. _Shit, is that blood?_ She looked back up, focusing on Melinda's face. With an effort, Olivia tried to understand what the ME was saying.

"Hold on Olivia." Melinda sounded like she was almost begging. "It's going to be OK, just keep breathing."

Olivia groaned and closed her eyes. Yeah, breathe. That's the challenge, in and of itself.

"Olivia!" Melinda shook her shoulder frantically. "Come on, honey, open your eyes." Melinda's voice shook with fear. This could not be happening. Olivia _had_ to be OK. "Please, Liv, you've got to stay awake," Melinda pleaded.

Olivia opened her eyes and looked at Melinda. "How bad?" she rasped. Melinda started at the look in Olivia's eyes. Pain, fear, and were those tears? This was the girl who kept her emotions and feelings behind an impenetrable iron wall; she just didn't openly _show_ this much emotion. This was the girl who hid behind the mantra of 'I'm fine', no matter the real answer.

"Mel!" Olivia gasped again. "Just tell me, how bad is it?"

Melinda hesitated. "Liv, don't worry, everything's going to-"

Olivia cut her off abruptly. "Melinda Warner don't you dare lie to me! I am a cop for Christ's sake, I'm not some fragile being. Stop lying and just tell me how bad it is. Shit!" Olivia gasped and winced as she tried to lever herself up on her elbows. Yeah, that was _not_ happening.

"Liv, just stay still, don't try to move," Melinda said. She pressed her hands harder to the wound in Olivia's abdomen. "I won't lie, I promise." She looked up at Sophie, who was pacing in front of the door. "She needs to go to a hospital."

Sophie stopped pacing and stared at the ME, the look in her eyes half passed crazy. "No! Nobody leaves!" She waved the gun madly.

Jo, who had been kneeling over Olivia's other side, keeping quiet until this point, looked up. Melinda was shocked to see tears in the ADA's eyes as well. "Sophie," she tried to plead, "Detective Benson needs medical assistance. You can keep us, just let her go."

"NO!" Sophie screamed again, before resuming her pacing.

Jo looked at Olivia again. The detective caught her eyes and nodded almost imperceptibly. "I'm fine," she whispered. Jo raised her eyebrows quizzically. They hadn't known each other that long, but Olivia could understand the 'yeah, right. Shut up and stop lying, 'cause no one here buys it' look that Jo was giving her right now. She smiled slightly, but it came out as more of a grimace.

Jo stood up and took a step towards Sophie, hands up in a nonthreatening gesture. "What's this going to solve, Sophie? What do you want?"

Sophie pointed the gun at Jo, holding on with both hands, shaking violently. "What do I want?" She shrieked. "I want my son back!" She turned the gun to Paul, who had been cowering by the gurney holding his son. Now speaking to Paul, she was even more hysterical. "Why did you take him from me?"

Paul looked at Sophie, hate in his eyes. "You did this, you bitch! You killed him!"

"NO!" Sophie screamed. Olivia had a fleeting image of a toddler's favorite word.

"Sophie!" Jo tried to draw her attention back. "What do you want to happen here? What do you want from us?"

Sophie looked back at Jo, tears in her eyes. "What do I want?" Jo nodded, encouraging. "I want you all to be quiet. My Nicholas is sleeping. You need to all be quiet!" Jo took another step forward, trying to get closer. Sophie saw this and held the gun up again. "Get back!" She shouted. "Don't come any closer!"

Jo stopped moving. "OK," she reasoned. "I'm not moving."

"No! Get back!" Sophie waved the gun like a madman.

Jo quickly backed up and knelt down by Olivia's side again. She looked at the detective and fear once again became the dominant emotion. Olivia was breathing heavily. Every time she blinked, her eyes seemed to stay closed for just a little bit longer. Melinda was keeping pressure on the wound but her shirt was slowly turning maroon, blood covering the ME's hands and seeping onto the floor. Jo grasped Olivia's left hand and held on, squeezing gently. She could feel Olivia squeeze back. She felt better immediately. Olivia was OK; she _had_ to be OK.

Olivia lifted her head up from the ground slightly and tried to focus on Sophie. Despite being shot, the cop in her would not shut off; there _had_ to be a way out of this, and quickly. Olivia was a realist, she knew it was bad. She was losing a lot of blood, and she needed to get to a hospital.

"Sophie."

Everyone turned to look at the detective. Olivia coughed and tried to speak again, her voice barely above a whisper.

"Sophie, Jo is right." Even in this dire state, Jo managed to look at Olivia, mock-shocked. Olivia smiled briefly. "I know, Jo, it was bound to happen at one time or another." She turned back to Sophie. "What do you want from us? What can we do to end this? What-" Olivia cut off in a coughing fit, and Melinda pressed down even harder.

"Olivia, come on, breathe!" Melinda was almost shaking now. This was really bad. She looked up at their captor. "Please, just let her go!" Sophie shook her head defiantly. "Sophie, she's going to die!"

Sophie refused to listen. "No, I don't believe you!" she screamed. "It's just a trick, you're trying to trick me!"

"It's not a trick, Sophie," Jo said, still holding Olivia's hand. "She needs to get to a hospital."

Olivia squeezed Jo's hand. "I'm OK," she rasped. "I'm fine."

Jo looked at Olivia, this time only cocking one eyebrow. "Yeah, because we all believe _that_," she stated sarcastically, one corner of her lip turned up.

Olivia just smiled and turned her head back to face the ceiling. Her eyelids became heavier, until they closed…and didn't open again.

_Sooooo? How's that for a cliffhanger? I know, there was a lot of Jo/Olivia in there, all that was just friendship stuff, I'm a total E/O fan! I was just kind of playing around with the Jo/Olivia friendship, which hasn't been really explored a whole lot, and I promise, all of that is just Jo worried about her FRIEND, who is lying in the morgue with a gunshot wound, bleeding out!_

_Next chapter, I promise, I'm going outside of the morgue, we'll see what's happening on the other side of the door, and where Elliot is._

_So, please R&R!_


	3. Chapter 3

**I'm on a role here! I just started this story tonight and here's chapter 3! I'll probably slow down, soon, but while I still know where the story is going, I'm going to get these chapters out as quickly as possible. I'm an avid fanfiction reader, so I know how much it sucks to keep waiting for the next chapter.**

**And thanks again for the great reviews; I'm glad people like the story. And I'm sorry to the reviewer who begged me not to, but it is turning into an EO story. I know it's been done to death, but that's where the muses seem to be taking me. I will try to incorporate a lot of friendship encounters in here though-I love the Melinda/Olivia friendship, we don't see a whole lot of them interacting on the show. **

**BTW, in this story, we're going to pretend that Elliot and Kathy are GETTING a divorce. It's not final yet, but he's moved out. **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but my own thoughts. You recognize it? It's not mine. *sigh* someday.**

The mood in the squad room was subdued. The case was mostly finished and it was a depressing one. Battle of the parents turned deadly.

Elliot looked up from his desk, taking a short break from the paperwork. He looked over at Munch, who was on the phone with a contact, trying to sort out the mess that they were dealing with, the mess that resulted in the death of a little boy.

Across from Munch, Fin was filling out his own forms. He looked up briefly and noticed Elliot staring at him.

"What's up Elliot?" He asked.

"Hmmm?" Elliot was drawn back to the present. "Oh, sorry. Daydreaming."

Fin nodded, and gestured to Olivia's desk. "Where's Liv?"

Elliot looked at the empty desk. "With Jo, they took Sophie to see Nicholas' body, see if they could get a confession out of her once she understood he was really dead."

Fin nodded again. "Let's hope so. I'm ready to put this case to bed."

Elliot chuckled humorlessly. "Couldn't agree with you more." He looked back down at his paperwork, sighed, and was about to get back to work when Cragen came out of his office, pale as a ghost. "Captain? Everything OK?" Elliot was concerned.

Fin stood up from his desk and faced the captain. "Cap, what's wrong?"

Cragen looked from him to Elliot. He knew this would be bad, whatever happened. He resolved to do his best to reel in one of his best detectives, an impossible task, he knew, once he shared the information from that phone call.

"Captain?" Elliot was getting more than a little scared now. Whatever it was, it couldn't be good.

Cragen took a breath. "Get down to the morgue, now," he said.

Shock crossed Elliot's face. "Why?" He asked. "What happened?"

"Shots fired," Cragen responded, watching Elliot's face carefully as concern was quickly replaced by shock, horror, and last but not least, fear. "I don't know what happened, but somebody heard the shots. The door is locked, we don't know what's going on inside."

Elliot had already grabbed his gun off his desk and was headed towards the door when Officer Nelson rushed in, panting.

"Captain!" He gasped. He came to a stop in the middle of the bullpen, and placed his hands on his thighs, trying to catch his breath. Through the wheezing, the surrounding detectives were able to discern "Morgue," "gun," "hostages," and "crazy lady."

Cragen put a hand on his shoulder and motioned for Fin to get him a glass of water. Once that act was complete and Nelson had gotten his breath back, Cragen looked at him worriedly.

"What happened, Nelson?"

Nelson glanced at Elliot, who was still rooted to the spot, halfway between his desk and the door. He looked back at the captain and gulped. "I'm so sorry, sir. It happened before I even realized it! I don't know how-"

"Nelson," Cragen interrupted. "Just tell us what happened."

"Yes sir," Nelson responded quickly. He glanced at Elliot again, noting the fear and concern in his eyes. "I was taking the father home, and he asked to see his son first. We went down to the morgue, and Ms. Gerard was already there, with Detective Benson and ADA Marlowe. They started arguing." He paused there for a second. He knew he was in a world of trouble. Not only had he been overpowered by a woman, a _suspect_, but looking around this room, he knew the only thing they would care about was that he had put Detective Benson, _the heart of the squad_, in danger. Looking at Elliot again, he gulped. Yeah, he was in huge trouble. Turning his attention back to Cragen, he continued. "She grabbed my gun. Had it pointed at ADA Marlowe. She was crazy! Screaming, telling everyone to get out. She threw me out of the room and locked the door. I don't know what happened after that, I came up here as fast as I could." He took another breath and looked at Elliot. "Detective Stabler, I'm-"

"Save it," was the reply. Elliot turned around and bolted off towards the morgue. His partner, his best friend was in trouble all because this idiot in a uniform couldn't keep a hold of his weapon.

Cragen nodded at Fin. "Go with him. A tactical team is already on its way there, our first priority is to figure out what's going on."

Fin nodded and followed Elliot out the door. Cragen turned to Nelson. "Just stay here," he told the man shortly. "We'll deal with this later."

Nelson gulped and nodded. Cragen looked over at Munch, who was still on the phone, but had obviously heard everything that was said. He locked eyes with Cragen. The captain nodded, telling the sergeant to keep doing what he was doing, and headed back to his office, anxious for more news.

Closing the door behind him, Cragen looked around the small room and sighed. He had a horrible feeling inside him, some gut instinct that was telling him something was wrong. _Well, of course it's saying that_, he tried to reason with himself. _You just heard that shots were fired inside a room where your other best detective is being held captive. _It was natural to have that uncomfortable feeling, right?

Walking around his desk, Cragen sank down into his chair and rubbed his hand over his face. This was turning into one hell of a day. He thought back to the look on Elliot's face when he told the squad the news. It was no secret that half the precinct thought that Olivia was the reason for Elliot's impending divorce, while the other half believed that Olivia had been 'the other woman' for years. Cragen belonged to the first group; he knew Olivia had better morals than that. She would never hurt Kathy that way, or Elliot's children. But he knew their feelings were more than the typical partner-friend relationship. He honestly didn't know how to describe it anymore. They were closer than any other partners in the NYPD, and that's what made them so good at their jobs. They had become friends so quickly, morphing into best friends, and now? Elliot would be a free man again soon, and what would happen then? Cragen smiled to himself.

Olivia would feel so guilty if she believed that he had ended his marriage for her, she would never want to be that person, the woman he left his wife for. But he saw the look in her eyes, the way she stared at him when she thought no one was looking; he saw the way they would stand so close to each other, shoulder's touching, during a briefing; he saw the glances, the touches, the pain in her eyes every time he brought up Kathy. He had seen her withdraw when he had announced Kathy's pregnancy, and his return to his wife. He saw her push that pain aside and try, desperately, to just be happy for her partner.

Munch had a pool going. He didn't know Cragen knew, but what good captain doesn't know the goings-on of his own squad? The pool had been there for years, since Olivia had first joined SVU, but now with Elliot's divorce? Most of the precinct was betting by now. Everyone could feel that unresolved sexual tension between the two, though there were those who believed it had been resolved. Very resolved. Ongoing resolved. Cragen sighed and shook his head again, pushing back from his desk. Yeah, things were definitely going to change. He didn't know how or when, but it was going to happen.

* * *

Elliot raced down to the morgue, meeting up with the tactical team outside the door. He nodded to the leader, recognizing Sergeant Leonard. "Have you made contact?" He asked breathlessly.

Sergeant Leonard looked at him. "Not yet," he replied. "What are you doing down here, Stabler? Tactical's got this one."

Elliot looked back at him. "My partner's in there," he said simply.

Leonard sized him up, and then nodded. "We're trying to reach someone inside, but no one's answering the phone."

Elliot pulled out his cell phone and pressed number one on the speed dial. "Let me try my partner's cell," he told the man. He put the phone to his ear and waited with baited breath as it began to ring.

_You must all hate me by now! I'll try not to do a cliff hanger for every chapter, but that just seemed like a good place to end it. Will Sophie let someone answer Olivia's cell? How is Olivia doing? To find out what happens next….Review! Maybe by then, I'll have an idea, LOL. Honestly, I'm just writing as it comes to me, I have no idea what's going to happen in the next chapter._

_Now….well, it's either bed, or back to my own perusing of SVU fanfiction…yeah, I'm gonna go with the latter, it's only 2am, and it's summer =]_


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: everything you recognize belongs to Dick Wolf and NBC**

"Olivia!" Melinda was trying frantically to get the detective to wake up. She looked back at Sophie. "Please, just let her go."

Sophie looked a little less uncertain, but didn't respond. Melinda looked back down.

"Come on, honey, wake up. Please," she begged. To her joy, Olivia moved her head and groaned slightly. She waited, but the detective's eyes stayed closed. She lightly tapped Olivia's cheek, still begging for her to open her eyes. Jo did nothing but grip Olivia's hand tighter, tears cascading down her face.

Even Paul was watching the detective worriedly.

Sophie was still pacing, though she glanced frequently at the fallen woman.

Olivia coughed and opened her eyes. "Can't-" she gasped, trying to speak. Trying again, she managed to rasp, "Can't breathe," so quietly it was almost a whisper.

Melinda looked down at her blood-covered hands, then at Jo again. "Jo!" she all but yelled at the ADA. She nodded to a cabinet on the far wall. "Get me some gauze and a syringe, they're in that cabinet."

Jo nodded and got up, heading to the cabinet in question.

Melinda looked back at Olivia, who was staring at her with a blank expression on her face, still gasping for air. Melinda's heart broke. This could not be happening. That _woman_ was signing Olivia's death certificate. This needed to end _now_. She felt a pressure on her upper arm and looked down to see Olivia's hand lightly squeezing her bicep.

"I trust you, Mel," Olivia said quietly, in between gasps.

Melinda tried to smile at her friend, but she knew it didn't come out right. "I'm going to do everything I can, Liv," she said quietly. "But you need to hold on. It _will_ be OK. I promise."

Olivia smiled at this. "Don't make promises you can't keep, Mel," she chastised.

Melinda felt her heart break again. How could Olivia be so OK with the thought that she might not make it out of this room? Was she really that ready to die? No. NO. Melinda would not let that happen. Olivia _would_ be OK.

Jo hurried back to the detective's side, handing Melinda the items she had asked for. Melinda took the syringe and instructed Jo, "Hold the gauze over the wound. Keep the pressure!" Jo put the gauze down as Melinda lifted her hands. Looking Olivia in the eyes, she continued, "You've got a collapsed lung. I need to re-inflate it. This might hurt a bit, but you need to stay still."

Olivia coughed again and looked at the Medical Examiner inquisitively. "Might hurt?" she rasped out. "I'm bleeding out from a fucking hole in my abdomen, can't breathe from a collapsed lung, and you think I'm concerned with a little _more_ pain?" She groaned again. "Just do it already."

Melinda nodded, although she'd never admit it slightly relieved that her friend's sarcasm was at least still intact, and felt Olivia's side, trying to find the right place to enter. She gripped the syringe tighter and drove it into Olivia's chest. With another gasp and cough, Olivia's breathing became less labored. Melinda breathed a sigh of relief.

"OK," she quipped. "One problem solved, but it's not getting better." She looked at Jo, who looked back up at Sophie.

"Please, Sophie," Jo tried to reason again. "I know you didn't mean to shoot Detective Benson, but right now you're killing her. I know you don't want that." She paused, and saw Sophie was listening to her, even if she hadn't stopped pacing. "You need to let her go, Sophie, so that she can get help. You don't want her to die, right?"

Jo stopped speaking, and the room was silent, save for Olivia's heavy breathing. Everyone started when a ringing sound pierced the air.

Sophie jumped and waved the gun frantically. "What is that?" She shrieked. "Turn it off!"

"It's my cell phone," Olivia groaned. "It's probably my partner, Sophie. Please let us answer."

"No!" Sophie yelled. "It's a trick!"

"No trick," Olivia whispered. "Sophie, you've been ignoring the calls to the Morgue phone, they're just going to keep trying. Please, let me talk to my partner."

Sophie looked uncertain. Finally she nodded and said, "Fine. Answer it."

Olivia nodded at Melinda, who took the phone out of Olivia's pocket and put it up to her ear. "Hello?" She answered.

"Liv? Hello?" Elliot practically shouted from the other end.

"Elliot, it's Melinda," Melinda answered.

"Mel?" Elliot stopped short, confused and getting more worried. "Where's Liv? What's going on in there? Is everything OK?"

"Elliot, calm down," Melinda tried to keep the man from going off the deep end. She looked up at Sophie, who nodded. "Olivia's been shot." She could practically hear Elliot stop breathing on the other end. "She's OK, _now_, but we're going to need an ambulance and paramedics down here, as soon as possible."

"That's enough!" Sophie screamed out. "You need to stop, now."

Melinda looked at their captor. Speaking into the phone, she deadpanned, "I've got to go, Elliot." She hung up the phone and placed it on the floor.

* * *

On the other side of the door, Elliot stared at his phone in disbelief. This could not be happening. _Liv was shot?_ Melinda said she was OK, but Elliot could not block out the emphasis on the 'now' that had been tacked on to the end. Did that mean she hadn't been OK? Or that she wouldn't be OK? It couldn't be good, Melinda had answered Olivia's cell. Didn't that in itself mean that Olivia wasn't physically capable of answering the phone herself?

Sergeant Leonard tapped Elliot on the shoulder. "What's going on, Stabler?" He asked.

Elliot looked up, startled out of his own thoughts. "My partner's been shot. Other than that, they're all OK." He looked past Leonard at the uniforms who were keeping back, there as backup, just in case. Nodding to them, he ordered, "Call an ambulance, and get the medics down here as soon as they arrive." As an officer nodded and headed off to carry out the order, he looked back at the sergeant. "Doctor Warner says we're going to need them."

Leonard noticed the scared look in Elliot's eyes. He was a little worried too. He had known Detective Benson for years, and he had never met a tougher cop, or a better one. The moniker 'Bad-Ass Benson' was well deserved and well earned.

"I'm sure she'll be OK, Stabler," he tried to comfort the man. He knew there wasn't much hope in that, though. Elliot wouldn't relax until he was with Olivia, at the hospital, positive she would be OK.

Elliot nodded absentmindedly, glaring at the door, as if it would magically open if he stared long enough.

_This seems like a good place to end the chapter, I'm not really sure what's going to happen next. So we'll leave off here, for now, and hopefully I'll be stricken by the muses again soon._

_PS, I'm not sure if it's a good thing that this is the fourth chapter I've uploaded since I started the story last night, or if it really is just proof that I actually have no life. Well, either way, here you go! R&R please =]_


	5. Chapter 5

**Ok, I should mention right now, that all my medical knowledge comes from watching **_**House**_**, so it might be right, it might not, but it's as close as I can get.**

**And once again, to those who are mad at me for making it EO, it really wasn't my intention to have them get together at all, it's just kind of the way it seemed to go. Completely unplanned, but I just had to do what the voices in my head told me to (my lovely muses, and no, I promise you I'm not crazy…I think).**

**I seem to be slowing down with the updates, and sadly I don't even have the excuse of work or classes to hide behind-I just get distracted reading other peoples SVU stories. *sigh*, well here's chapter five. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: you recognize it? Not mine!**

Fin was nervously watching Elliot pace, waiting for him to snap. Sometimes he wondered if the man even knew how in love he was with his partner. Looking at him now, Fin thought he might. It was all in the look; Elliot was scared to death that his partner was hurt behind that door, and he couldn't do a thing to help her. He was probably feeling ten times of guilty that he hadn't been there to protect her. Fin had to shake his head at that one; Elliot honestly believed that he could protect his partner from all the hurt in the world. It just wasn't possible, but try telling him that. It was like Elliot wanted to keep Olivia safe now, to make up for her being so hurt as a child.

Elliot stopped his pacing and locked eyes with Fin for a moment. That look had Fin quickly receding. The bond that those two shared was not natural. He knew that Olivia had been just as worried when it had been Elliot's life in the balance, but she was better at hiding her emotions than he was. The fear in Elliot's eyes was making him worried, and he wondered if he would be able to reel the detective in if he snapped, which would probably happen pretty soon if they couldn't get Olivia out of that room.

Glancing around, Fin saw almost everybody watching Elliot out of the corner of their eyes. Waiting for him to explode. Detective Stabler's temper was legendary in the NYPD, closely followed by his protectiveness of his partner. Fin smirked; everyone here knew the man would do whatever he had to in order to get his partner to safety.

"Sergeant Leonard!" A uniform ran up to the group, panting. He handed a rolled up piece of paper to the sergeant and continued, "The blueprints you asked for, sir. If there's another way into the morgue, it'll be here."

Sergeant Leonard nodded his thanks and unrolled the paper. Elliot and Fin crowded around him as he searched for something, anything that could get someone into that room.

"There!" Elliot pointed to an air duct. "It leads into the office, and it looks big enough for a person."

Leonard examined the passage in question and nodded. "Works for me." He turned to his team behind him. "Richardson!" The officer in question stepped forward. "You're going in…"

"I'm going," Elliot interrupted.

Leonard stopped talking and looked at him. "I don't think that's such a good idea Detective," he tried to reason.

"I'm going," Elliot insisted. He noticed the hesitation on Leonard's face and continued. "Sergeant, that is my partner in there. Every second we waste arguing out here is one second later that I can get in there. I'm going." His tone left no room for discussion.

Leonard sighed and nodded. There was no use arguing with the man when he got like this. "Be careful, Elliot," he warned. "Don't let your emotions rule your decisions."

Elliot nodded and turned to Fin. "Stay here, hopefully Munch got somewhere with that phone call."

Fin nodded and looked at the detective. They had gotten off to a rocky start, and had certainly hit their share of rough patches, but the man was a good cop, and a good friend. "Be careful, Elliot," he said, mirroring Sergeant Leonard's instructions. "And don't freak out. Liv'll be fine. She's a tough girl."

Elliot chuckled as he turned away to find the entrance to the air duct. "Don't I know it," he muttered as he left the group.

Leonard watched his retreating back, then turned to Fin. "So, have they hooked up yet?" he asked innocently.

Fin just stared back.

* * *

Elliot found the entrance to the vent without much trouble. Turning around to the uniform who had accompanied him, he instructed, "Stay here, and keep the volume on the radio low. The sound might echo."

The officer nodded. "Yes Detective," he replied.

Elliot removed his jacket and handed it to the man. Turning back around, he removed the covering and crawled inside.

* * *

"Mel," Olivia gasped. Damn, this breathing thing was getting harder. Olivia tried to catch her breath, but it was like she just couldn't get enough air in to inflate her lungs.

Melinda stared down at the detective, cursing herself for not being able to do anything. One of her best friends was lying there, bleeding out on a cold, hard floor, and she couldn't _do_ a damn thing about it! What was the point of being a doctor if she couldn't save her friend? Melinda resolved to get Olivia out alive. She would _not_ see her on her table later.

"Don't speak, Liv," Melinda said quietly. "Just keep breathing."

Melinda looked up at the crazy woman who hadn't stopped shaking and pacing since she had commandeered the morgue. She decided it was time for her to try and be the negociator.

"Sophie," she pleaded. "You need to tell us what you want to happen. What do you want from the detectives? How can we end this?"

Sophie stopped and stared at the Medical Examiner. Tears streaked down her face, making her look even more unbalanced. "Why do you all think I killed my son!" She wailed. "I want you to stop saying it is my fault." She glared at Paul, who had yet to uncurl from his fetal position, cowering on the floor. "He is my son! You stole him from me!" Sophie was building into a temper tantrum rant by now. "I want him back!" She broke down. "I want my son back!"

Melinda stood up slowly. "I know you do, Sophie," she reasoned. "But holding us hostage, risking Detective Benson's life, is not going to bring him back. It won't change anything." She paused and glanced back down at Olivia, who nodded to her friend, silently telling the ME she was on the right path. Looking back up, she continued, "You say you didn't kill Nicholas. You say you're not a killer, right?"

Sophie nodded, seeming relieved that someone was siding with her, finally. "Yeeess," she dragged out, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Of course I am not a killer!"

"Then what is it you think you're doing right now?" Melinda asked. She gestured back to Olivia. "Detective Benson will die, unless we get her to a hospital." She stopped for a moment to let that information sink in. "Sophie, if you're not a killer like you say, you'll let her go." She paused again, then quietly added a simple, "Please."

Sophie looked from Melinda, standing unthreateningly in front of her, to Paul, cowering on the floor off to the side, to Jo, still pressing down on the wound in Olivia's abdomen, and lastly to Olivia, breathing heavily, her hand subconsciously opening and closing at her side, as if she was trying to grasp on to something, anything, that would keep her anchored in time, trying to find something to hold on to, to keep her aware of the world around her.

Sophie saw all of this, and her resolve waivered.

_Ok, I'm going to stop there for now. I was going to keep going, I have some ideas of what's going to happen next, but this seemed like as good a chapter-ender as any._

_So, as always, reviews are appreciated!_


	6. Chapter 6

**Sorry for the longer waiting time, I was….well I really don't have an excuse, I was just distracted. Happy reading!**

**Disclaimer: you all know what goes here-not mine, wishful thinking , insert witty comment here.**

Munch hung up his phone and sighed. Was it just him, or were the perps of New York City getting smarter? And why in god's name couldn't a case ever be easy? He stood up and headed to the captain's office.

Knocking first, he received no response. He knocked again, and upon hearing a muffled 'come in', he opened the door and entered.

"What have you got, John?" Cragen asked tiredly. He _really_ needed some good news right now. He glanced at his phone for the 10th time in two minutes, hoping that someone would call and tell him what was going on in the morgue.

Munch moved forward and started talking. "Well, Captain, it's kind of a good news bad news scenario right now." He paused, waiting for the go-ahead to continue. At Cragen's nod, he kept talking. "Well, the bad news is, we were wrong. Dead wrong. So wrong that-"

Cragen cut in. "I get it Munch! What's the good news, and it had better _be_ good."

Munch smiled. "Well, I think we have a way to get everyone out of the morgue safe and sound."

* * *

Elliot was panting. Crawling through this tiny space was tiring. Trying to crawl while keeping as quiet as possible was even worse. He kept moving trying to remember the directions to the morgue he had hastily memorized in just a few minutes.

Almost there. Elliot was moving as fast as possible without making too much noise. He _needed_ to get in there. He needed to make sure Olivia was OK. The not knowing was killing him. He needed to know if his best friend, his partner, his-. The thought stopped Elliot in his tracks. _His love_? Did he love his partner? Elliot didn't think he should answer that. But then…

He was in the process of a divorce. He had moved out. Was there anything wrong with admitting it now? Admitting that he was in love with his partner? That he had, in fact, been in love with her for years?

Here in this claustrophobic air vent, somewhere in the ceiling above the morgue, faced with the very real possibility of losing the object of his affection for a solid decade, he finally acknowledged it. He, Elliot Stabler, was in love with his partner. Everybody was right; he had denied and refuted, rebuffed and repudiated when they all gave him those knowing looks. He couldn't keep it buried any more. He had ended his 20 year marriage because of Olivia. He had stuffed his feelings down, tried to tell himself they weren't real, she was a beautiful woman and that was it; but here and now, he finally acknowledged it.

Elliot was startled out of his groundbreaking reverie by the vibrating of his cell phone in his pocket. Grabbing it quickly, he saw the text message from Munch: 'Sophie innocent. Credit card opened by Paul in Sophie's name'. Elliot's heart began to race. This meant that they could get everyone out, right? They could get Sophie to give up the gun.

Putting his phone away, Elliot continued to move forward, a new vigor and determination evident.

* * *

"Sophie," Melinda could see the war waging behind the woman's eyes. She knew her resolve was wavering, and she was starting to get optimistic. "You know it's the right thing to do. You need to put that gun down."

Sophie looked at the ME and for a moment, it seemed like she would listen to reason. But then her eyes hardened and the gun came to rest in Paul's direction.

"He needs to suffer! He took my son from me!"

Melinda sighed internally. So much for reasoning, this woman was insane. Out of the corner of her eye she saw the office door open slightly and it took all of her willpower not to turn her head to look.

Elliot inched the door open slowly, trying not to draw any attention to himself. Slowly he wiggled himself through and hid behind a pillar, still unacknowledged to the room. He saw Sophie pointing the gun at Paul, Melinda standing up in a peaceful manner, and Jo seemed to be watching over Olivia. _Olivia_. As soon as Elliot's eyes flickered in that direction, he couldn't bear to look away. She was only semi-conscious, and her shirt was soaked with blood. Jo seemed to be attempting to slow the bleeding, but it didn't look like it was working. Elliot's heart almost stopped. Melinda said she was _fine_? His teeth clenched; that was not fine.

With a tremendous effort, Elliot tore his eyes off of his partner and back to the woman who commanded the room. Sophie was muttering under her breath, but he could not make out the words.

Paul chose this moment to speak again. "I took nothing from you, you bitch!" He cried. "You killed him. You did!"

Sophie cocked the gun and attempted to hold it steady, while crying uncontrollably. "I did not! I did not kill my son!"

Elliot decided this would be a good time to make his presence known. Stepping forward slightly, gun levered in front of him, he spoke to the hysterical woman.

"We know you didn't Sophie," he called out.

Sophie jerked and pointed the gun toward the anonymous voice. "Who is there?" she yelled. "What are you doing here, how did you get in?"

Elliot took another step forward. "It's Detective Stabler, Sophie. Remember me?" Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Olivia's eyes flutter open at the sound of his voice and look his way. He thought he saw relief in them, before they closed again. Focusing his attention now on the woman in front of him, he saw her nod her head in recognition, though she didn't lower the gun.

"Why do you believe me now?" she questioned. "You have been telling me I'm guilty forever, what has changed?"

Melinda had let out a huge sigh of relief as she saw Olivia's partner enter the room. Surely it would all be over soon. Watching the encounter closely, she saw reasoning return to Sophie's eyes, and she began to hope again.

Elliot stared Sophie in the eyes, making sure she believed what he was saying. "Because now we have proof, Sophie," he replied. "We know you didn't kill your son." Turning his gun away from the woman in front of him, he aimed at Paul instead. "You, however, did."

Paul looked up at the detective, astonished. "What do you mean, Detective?" He tried to get out of the situation he knew was coming. "I did no such thing! It was all her!" He pointed at Sophie. "She hired that criminal, she killed Nicholas!"

"Save it." Elliot cut him off. "We know you set up that credit card in Sophie's name. You hired that man to kidnap your son."

Sophie, who had been relieved and almost calm at this point, raised the gun again and pointed it at Paul as her arm began to shake. "YOU DID THIS!" she shrieked, getting crazier again. "You killed him! My Nicholas is dead because of you!" She broke down crying, though the gun did not waiver.

"Sophie," Elliot tried to get through. "He's going away for a very long time. Don't shoot him; you're innocent now, but you won't be if you pull that trigger."

Sophie was far past listening to reason now. She steadily walked closer to Paul, who shrunk back, trying to get away from the crazy woman with the gun, but there was no further to go. Cringing, he closed his eyes, fear prominent in every line on his face.

"Sophie."

Jo had not moved from her spot next to the semi-conscious detective, not looked up when Elliot entered the room and shared his 'get out of jail free card', but when she spoke, every eye in the room turned to her. Even Sophie's.

"Sophie, you have been telling us you're not a killer since you locked us in here. I know he deserves it, but your son needs you free." She had been looking down at Olivia until this point, but now she looked up at the woman, who genuinely seemed to be listening and absorbing what she said. "Sophie, for your son's sake, don't do this. Give the gun to Detective Stabler, and let him deal with this shitty excuse for a man."

Sophie looked at the ADA for a moment, and then turned her eyes to her son, lying lifeless at the center of the room. With one more heavy sob, she dropped the arm holding the gun. Elliot moved in swiftly and took it from her. Sophie sunk to the ground and let the sobs take her.

Melinda moved forward quickly and opened the door. Speaking to the officers who waited beyond, she quickly told them, "It's all clear. Where are the paramedics?"

The two medics, who had been waiting further back, walked quickly into the room, followed by Fin, who stopped short at the sight of Olivia lying there, covered in blood.

As the paramedics rushed to Olivia's side, so did Elliot. Jo relinquished her hold as one of the medics took over, allowing Elliot to take her place by his partner's side. Watching him kneeling there, Jo finally smiled. Even she, who had only been working with SVU for a couple of months, knew there was something between the two; it was obvious to anyone who had ever met the detectives, except of course, to the two involved.

Quickly the paramedics had Olivia assessed, an oxygen mask in place, and were in the process of getting her on the gurney to take out to the ambulance, and then to the hospital. Elliot had taken Olivia's hand and was squeezing tighter than Jo had. All the while he was just staring at his partner's face, silently begging her to open her eyes.

"Come on, Olivia," he whispered. "Open your eyes, honey, please."

Olivia stirred, and to Elliot's joy, her eyes fluttered. "El?" she whispered.

"I'm here, Liv," he replied. "I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere."

Olivia just closed her eyes again and sighed. "El," she breathed, and spoke no more.

"BP's dropping!" One of the medics yelled.

The other medic pushed harder on the wound; the new gauze they had used was already turning red. Quickly they wheeled Olivia out of the room, Elliot still holding her hand, his face ashen. They were followed closely by Melinda, whose caramel skin had also taken on a white sheen, and Jo, eyes scared again as she watched the detective she respected the most out of the whole squad losing the grip on life she had been hanging on to this whole time.

Fin, who had watched the whole exchange in a trancelike state, brought up the rear; he couldn't believe that Olivia, his little sister/best friend, was lying there, hurt, and he couldn't do a thing to change it. Fin actually almost smiled as he had that thought. Who knew he and Elliot could actually have the same thoughts?

The small parade of people made their way up to the street level and out to the ambulance, passing crowds of officers, shocked that one of their own was down, and in their own building too!

Cragen and Munch met them at the door. They let the medics pass, and did not even try to talk to Elliot. The look on his face said quite clearly that he was going with his partner in the ambulance.

Cragen cleared his throat. "Melinda, Jo, I'm glad you're both OK."

They both looked at him, and said nothing. He could clearly read something along the lines of, 'Physically, maybe, but don't even _think_ of trying to say that we're OK' in their postures. He reserved a small half-smile for that.

Continuing, he added, "We'll all go together, meet Liv and Elliot at the hospital."

Nodding blankly, the two women and Fin followed the captain and Munch to the sedan.

_Wow, that took much longer to write, mostly because I just kept taking breaks to read other people's stories. I'm glad it's done!_

_I think I'm almost done, but there's probably a few more chapters to go, we'll see. Enjoy, and please review!_


	7. Chapter 7

**To the wonderful reviewer trix20: that's what I told Dick Wolf! lol**

**Thank you all so much for the wonderful reviews, they totally make my day (I mean, literally, I spend my days looking to see if my favorite stories have new chapters, checking to see if I have any new reviews, going through the archives and reading new stories, and working on my own story. It's kinda sad, but fan fiction is literally my life right now-don't you just love summer? haha)**

**Disclaimer: you all know the drill. Everything you recognize belongs to Dick Wolf, lucky guy.**

The ride to the hospital was quiet. Everyone seemed lost in their own thoughts, staring blankly out the window, with the exception of Cragen, who seemed to be driving well enough, though when Munch, who was sitting shotgun, glanced over at his captain he recognized the blank look as kin to the ones the other passengers were wearing. He was surprised the captain hadn't crashed the car yet.

Fin glanced over at the two women who were sharing the back seat with him. Both had shocked expressions and didn't seem to realize where they were. It was as if their body was on autopilot, going through the actions, while their minds were still back in the morgue, undoubtedly watching Olivia get shot over and over again.

_Olivia_. Fin's thoughts turned to the woman who had captivated all of their lives for over a decade. He was scared, and trying to hide it. Fin had to admit, if only to himself, that if something happened to the woman, the squad would never recover. It was funny now, how he had never really realized how important and integral Olivia was to SVU. She _was_ the squad. She was the one he looked forward to seeing every morning, the one he worried about most during the day, and the one he was most loathe to leave at night. There was nothing romantic about it; Fin smiled internally at that: he'd leave the romance to Elliot. No, it was that she was the living, breathing center of the unit. She was what kept them all going when they just wanted to stop. She lived for the victims, and she let her passion for her job affect and infect everyone around her.

Fin sighed. Olivia was going to be OK. She _had_ to be OK; not only for Elliot's sake, but for all their sakes. For him, his little sister. For Munch, the favorite niece. Cragen, the daughter he had never had. Fin glanced over at the ME and ADA again. Melinda might be another sibling, and even Jo had been upgraded to friend by this point.

Fin smiled grimly out the window. Olivia was a fighter. She _would_ be OK.

* * *

The ambulance was blaring, sirens and all, racing towards Mercy General. It felt like the driver was trying to set a record time for how long it took to get from the precinct to the hospital, but Elliot didn't care. He was focused on Olivia, who had yet to open her eyes again.

Elliot was doing his best to stay out of the way of the medic, but he didn't want to leave Olivia's side. She was so pale, her breathing coming in short bursts.

The bus hit another pothole, and Olivia winced slightly, eyes still not opening. The medic, whom Elliot now knew as Eric-not that he really cared-cursed at his partner.

"Damn it Tom!" he yelled. "I thought we talked about avoiding those!"

"Sorry Eric," Tom yelled back. "I thought you'd prefer speed."

"I prefer whatever will get our patient to the hospital alive," Eric retorted.

Elliot looked up and locked eyes with the medic briefly. The look Eric gave the detective was sympathetic; he could imagine what this man would be going through. His partner was fighting for her life, and he couldn't do a thing to help. Eric had friends in the NYPD-a side effect of the job was having most of his friends come from the pool of cops and fire fighters, but he liked it that way-and he knew the lengths some partners would go to, to help one another. Looking at this pair, he could tell that this was one pair that would do anything for each other. He had heard tales of the great Benson and Stabler, some of the best detectives New York had to offer. He knew they exemplified all the NYPD had to offer: they would do whatever was necessary to help the victim and get the perp.

Eric looked back down at Olivia as he heard a small gasp, then nothing. The heart monitor waivered slightly, then just a constant, unwavering, steady tone.

_Sorry, I know it's short, but I wanted to get an update out._

_Another cliffhanger! I know, you're all probably hating me by this point. But this seemed a good place to end, and I have some idea of how to start the next chapter, so hopefully it won't be so long before I get another one up._

_See, I do have a plan lol! Well, maybe half a plan…ok, so I have the phrase 'I have a plan'-but it's a good start =]_


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: everything you recognize belongs to Dick Wolf and NBC-maybe someday =]**

_Last time:_

_Eric looked back down at Olivia as he heard a small gasp, then nothing. The heart monitor waivered slightly, then just a constant, unwavering, steady tone._

**XXX**

Elliot's heart stopped. Before he could blink, Eric was there, performing CPR frantically.

As he worked, he shouted up front, "How far out, Tom?"

"Less than a minute!" He shouted back.

Eric looked at Elliot. "Detective."

Elliot didn't respond. He was staring, shell-shocked, at his partner, unable to think, unable to hear anything beyond the steady tone that filled the ambulance.

Eric shouted again. "Detective Stabler!" Elliot looked up. "Give me a hand, here." He nodded to the bag valve mask behind him. "Place that over her mouth. Every three seconds, squeeze."

Elliot nodded, and got set up. He counted in his head then squeezed. Eric continued the chest compressions.

_One, two, three, squeeze_. Elliot refused to allow his mind to think beyond that. Continuing that mantra, they pulled into the ambulance bay. Tom ran around back to help Eric unload Olivia. He took over for Elliot, and the three ran into the hospital, where they were quickly surrounded by doctors.

"What do we got?" asked the closest one.

"Detective Olivia Benson, early forties, shot in the abdomen. Lost a lot of blood, BP dropped continually throughout the ride. Coded in route, about a minute ago," Eric responded rapidly.

"All right, we'll take it from here," the doctor told him. They quickly whisked Olivia away from the paramedics. Elliot tried to follow, but was stopped.

"Let the doctors do their jobs, Detective." Elliot looked around to notice Eric restraining him, one hand on his shoulder. "She'll be fine," he continued. "I can just tell. That girl's a fighter."

Elliot almost smiled at that. He looked down, defeated. "You have no idea," he whispered.

Slowly, Elliot left the paramedics and headed towards the waiting room. Upon reaching his destination, he stopped, suddenly unsure as to what to do next. Forgoing the uncomfortable plastic chairs, he leaned against the wall, as all of the memories from the ambulance ride came flooding back. Right at the forefront was that incessant tone, telling him his best friend had given up. She wasn't coming back to him, not anymore. She had finally had enough, and she was leaving him.

Sliding down the wall, Elliot rested his head on his knees and gave in to the tears.

**XXX**

When Cragen pulled up to the emergency bay, everyone piled out. Munch looked back at the captain briefly.

"I'll park the car and meet you inside," Cragen assured the sergeant.

Munch nodded and followed the rest of the group inside.

They found Elliot in the waiting room, slumped against the wall, head resting on his knees. Melinda quickly walked over and knelt next to him, putting a hand on his shoulder. She said nothing, not knowing what to say in this situation.

Fin and Jo kept back, feeling awkward and out of place. Munch, joining the group, felt the same way. Their quiet vigil was interrupted by the same doctor who had met Elliot and Olivia on arrival.

"Family of Detective Benson?" She querried.

Elliot didn't raise his head. Fin looked at the doctor and spoke for him. "That's us," he replied.

The doctor took in the small group and nodded. "I'm Doctor Allison Stevens; I'm taking care of Olivia. Can any of you tell me exactly what happened? How long before paramedics got to her?"

Melinda glanced up, not moving away from Elliot, who seemed to be calming down with the friendly contact; he was slowly regaining some semblance of control.

"It was probably about half an hour," she answered the doctor's question. "One of her lungs collapsed," she continued, noticing Elliot's head turn toward her at this, shock evident in his features. "I re-inflated it, but she was having trouble breathing after that."

Dr. Stevens looked at Melinda questioningly.

Correctly guessing the query behind the doctor's glance, Melinda responded, "Doctor Melinda Warner, ME."

Dr. Stevens nodded. She took in the group as a whole, noting the arrival of an older man, who silently joined them, attention on the doctor; they all seemed to be wearing the same terrified expression. She nodded to Elliot on the floor. "I don't know if Detective Stabler has filled you in on anything…" she paused, looking at each person individually as they all turned to look at their colleague; from the confused mask they all wore, she guessed that he hadn't. Gaze lingering on the man curled into a ball on the floor, she figured that he probably hadn't said anything since coming to the hospital.

Dr. Stevens continued. "Olivia coded on the way to the hospital." She saw their shock and fear and hurried to assure them. "We were able to shock her heart back into a somewhat normal rhythm, but she's lost a lot of blood. Before we can attempt any further surgery, we need to get her stabilized, and get her blood volume up." She paused again. "Do you know any of her medical history? Her blood type, perhaps?"

The group all looked at each other, not knowing the answer. Elliot was the one to ask, but he seemed a little busy at the moment. He had raised his head, but was staring straight across the room, looking through, rather than at, any objects blocking his eyesight and view of the wall opposite.

Elliot, meanwhile, was replaying what he considered to be one of the most important and best moments he'd ever shared with his partner.

_We've been partners all these years, and I don't even know your blood type._

_A positive._

_How about that, me too._

_I'd give you a kidney._

_Not if I gave you mine first._

"Elliot?" Cragen drew the detective out of his reverie.

Looking around, he noticed everyone looking at him, worried. Elliot realized that he was smiling nostalgically. He glanced up at his captain, smile disappearing, and then looked at the doctor for the first time.

"A positive," he answered the doctor's question. Slowly he got to his feet, muscles protesting. "So am I, if you need a donor."

The doctor appraised Elliot, and nodded. "I may take you up on that." She turned to address everyone. "We'll let you know when she's stable enough to return to surgery."

The doctor turned to leave, but was stopped before she reached the door.

"Is there anything we can do?" Dr. Stevens turned to look at the older man who had called out.

"Not right now," she answered. "Just be here, we'll let you know what's going on." She paused, considering her next statement. "Technically, I'm not supposed to share any information with anyone except next of kin…" Dr. Stevens saw that they were about to protest, and rushed on. "But I know the bond that you in law enforcement share. You _are_ her family, am I right?" Seeing them all nod forcefully, she smiled. "I won't keep you in the dark. Besides," she added, "according to her files, Detective Stabler is the next of kin."

With that, Dr. Stevens left the room, and the room fell silent.

Munch and Fin looked at each other, and then at Elliot, who had drifted over to the window and was staring out, still lost in his memories. They drifted over to the man, wordlessly offering him support just by being there.

Cragen looked at the two remaining women. Melinda was still kneeling on the floor; she had dropped her hands to her waist and was playing with the hem of her shirt absentmindedly.

Jo had yet to say a word. Cragen sighed quietly. The ADA was a new edition to their team. She hadn't been there long, but then it seemed like the lawyers who filled the job were just temps, rotating out every few months. Though Jo had lasted longer than he had expected; it seemed surprisingly easy, the friendship that had sprung up between the ADA and detectives. Granted, she _was_ Elliot's old partner, but Cragen was amazed at how easily Olivia had accepted the new prosecutor.

Deciding he couldn't wait any longer, he addressed the women. "Can you tell us what happened?"

Melinda and Jo looked at the captain. Immediately Jo began to tear up again, and Melinda looked shaky.

"I'm sorry," Cragen apologized, "but I need to know what happened."

"Us too," Fin added, as he and Munch approached, Elliot in tow.

Melinda and Jo looked at each other. Before Melinda could speak, Jo answered the captain's question. She studiously avoided Elliot's gaze, afraid of the accusations she would see in his eyes.

"Sophie grabbed the Officer's gun," she choked out. "She was crazy, waving it everywhere. I- I don't know exactly how-"

"I think Olivia saw Sophie aiming at Paul," Melinda cut in. She looked over at Jo, who shot her an appreciative look. Melinda nodded before continuing. She smiled slightly. "That's Liv, always the cop. She must have seen some clue or something that said Sophie was going to shoot. She pushed Paul out of the way and took the bullet."

Cragen nodded, smirking. He knew Olivia could never turn off the cop in her. She was always thinking, figuring out how to save the civilians no matter the risk to her. Of course, in this case it was bittersweet, since the man she had saved was in fact the perp; Cragen shook his head at that: Even if she had known, Olivia would have tried to save him; that was just the person she was.

Munch was watching Elliot as he listened. The detective seemed to be listening, but he still wasn't really _looking_; his eyes had that glassy look that said he wasn't really seeing anything in front of him. Munch shook his head and made a mental note to make sure that Elliot didn't lose his mind; Olivia would never forgive him if the man went of the deep end just because she wasn't there to bring him back.

Munch had always been the conspiracy nut in the precinct, and people tended to tune him out before he even began to talk; but when he spoke about Elliot and Olivia, people listened. Everyone knew those two were close. Munch didn't know if it was a conspiracy or not, but he knew that they were in love with each other. Looking at his colleague now, he wondered if the man would finally confess his feelings to the object of his affection.

Elliot caught Munch staring at him, and, almost as if he had heard the sergeant's thoughts, he wondered how on earth it had taken Olivia getting shot for him to finally realize how in love with her he was.

Elliot was interrupted from his revelations by the loud opening of the waiting room doors. He turned towards the noise intruder stopping short at the sight in front of him. The rest of the group, looking over to see what had caused Elliot's astonishment, were shocked when none other than former ADA Casey Novak burst into the room.

_You all know I just had do add the kidney line! It's just not a 'Liv gets shot' story without it!_

_And because we all want Casey back (well, maybe not all, but I'm sure most of us want her). I was going to keep going, but that seemed like a really good line to end on, I promise, there will be more in the next chapter, including what the ADA's been up to for the last two years or so-wow, has it really been that long? Maybe it just doesn't seem like it to me because I didn't get hooked on SVU until last month, so I watched the last two seasons in about 3 days. Some people might call that crazy, I call it a rather impressive record lol! =]_

_Well, hope you enjoyed the chapter. I'll try to get another one out this week, since I'll be gone visiting my sister for the weekend, so I won't be able to do anything then. As always, please R&R =]_


	9. Chapter 9

**Another chapter! I really want to keep cranking these out, but it's getting harder to write. I have some ideas, but I'm not sure where I want this to go, in terms of an ending. Any suggestions?**

**Disclaimer: it's not mine! I wish it was, and maybe one day I'll be successful enough to own a show as popular as this, but for now, I'm just the struggling film/TV student. Here's to hoping *raises glass*.**

_Last time:_

_Elliot was interrupted from his revelations by the loud opening of the waiting room doors. He turned towards the noise intruder stopping short at the sight in front of him. The rest of the group, looking over to see what had caused Elliot's astonishment, were shocked when none other than former ADA Casey Novak burst through the waiting room doors._

**XXX**

Casey hurried into towards the little group, who were all standing dumbstruck, watching their former colleague rush towards them.

"It's all over the news!" She cried out, in way of greeting. "Is Liv OK?"

Looking around as no one answered, she felt panic rise in her chest.

"Please, guys, just tell me if she's OK," she all but begged.

Finally Cragen snapped out of his trancelike state. "She's…" he trailed off, not knowing how to respond. Looking at Casey's horrified expression, he tried to continue. "The doctor says she needs to stabilize more before they can operate."

Casey couldn't believe it. How could this have happened? Her best friend, the only one who had kept in touch after her disbarrment, was now somewhere in this hospital, possibly dying!

"She's going to be OK, right?" she choked out. Silence greeted her query. Speaking more to herself now, she repeated, "She's going to be all right. She has to be." Casey looked up at the group of detectives, plus medical examiner and ADA that surrounded her, and saw the questions in their eyes. She sighed, knowing what was coming.

"When's the last time you saw Liv?" That one came from Munch. He had missed the redhead, more than he cared to admit, but he hadn't seen her for almost two years, despite the promises that he would keep in touch.

"Yesterday," Casey answered softly. She saw the shock register, and continued. "After I-left-Liv and I promised to see each other regularly. We try to meet up at least once a week to hang out."

They were surprised. They had all, of course, made promises to not lose touch with the woman, but life just kept going. Things happened, and as horrible as it sounded, keeping in touch with the disbarred lawyer just got pushed to the back of their minds. None of them knew that Olivia had actually kept her promise, going out of her way not to lose one of the few real friends she had.

Jo had kept to the back of the group when Casey walked in. She knew who this was, though she had never actually met the woman. Casey was one of the ADA's who had stayed the longest with SVU, and Jo realized now that the woman had formed bonds with the detectives, bonds that she couldn't, not easily anyway. Hell, she considered herself lucky that they even somewhat seemed to accept her, although she thought maybe Elliot, sticking up for his former partner, may have had something to do with it.

Looking at Elliot now, she cringed. She was afraid of what he might say to her; true, she wasn't a cop anymore, but she had let his partner get hurt. She of all people knew the bond that partners shared. She knew Elliot needed something to hold on to now, even if that something was just someone to blame. And as much as she hated herself for it, she was mad at Elliot for that, for making her think that he would blame her for what had happened. In her mind, she knew she was being unfair; it wasn't her fault, she couldn't have done anything. But she knew Elliot well, and she recognized the look in his eyes. He needed to blame someone, and if he couldn't blame her, he would blame himself. He didn't want to accept that he was at fault for any of it, so he would lash out any way possible, trying to quell his own guilty thoughts.

As she stared at him now, she started to reconsider her line of thought; he probably already accepted that it was his fault: he blamed himself. Shaking her head, _that was a mess she would deal with later, if it came to that_, the current ADA turned back to the previous one, forcing herself to pay attention to the conversation.

Casey was filling her friends in on the last two years.

"I've been traveling a lot," she answered in response to Fin's question, the big one that had been on all of their minds for a while now. "I stayed with my parents on Long Island for a while, while I was trying to figure out what to do with my life. I just couldn't give up the idea of being able to help people, so I joined a relief group and went to Africa. I was there for a few months, and I came back to New York about a month ago."

Casey was speaking to everyone, but she couldn't stop watching Elliot. He looked so distressed. He was standing with the group, but he didn't really seem to be _there_; he was just a shell, his mind was probably far away, thinking about his partner. Casey knew the dynamic duo very well. She didn't know the details of this incident, but she could imagine that, as he was here and unharmed while Olivia was fighting for her life, the man probably blamed himself for what had happened. That was one of his best and worst traits: he was so protective of his partner, but he tended to think that he could save her from anything and everything. With that attitude he was probably going to end up slowly killing himself from guilt some day.

Casey shook her head. She had missed this, however much she tried to hide it. She had missed Munch, with his crazy conspiracy theories, Fin with his tough exterior that _almost_ covered up the gentleness and caring; Cragen, with his stout over-protectiveness and willingness to toe the line wherever necessary to shield his detectives; and Elliot and Olivia, the sexual tension between the two had always been interesting to watch. They were so protective of each other, standing up to the brass, to her, to anyone who threatened them. Elliot with his temper that was just a cover so that no one would see the pain he was in, Olivia with her tough-cop attitude that was really a mask for a constant ache and a horrible past. Individually they didn't add up, but together they made each other better, they made each other the detectives they were, and together they made up the best partnership in the NYPD.

As the friends reacquainted themselves, they drifted over to sit in the uncomfortable chairs, making themselves comfortable for a while. At this point, Casey noticed the unfamiliar face in the crowd.

Noticing Casey's gaze shift to her, Jo introduced herself, stepping forward. "ADA Jo Marlowe." She smiled at Casey, who returned the favor.

"So you're the one who got my job, huh?" Casey grinned.

Fin had sat down next to Elliot, who had gone back to staring at the wall, chin resting in his hands, looking distant. He didn't know what to do, if he _could_ do anything to help the man out; true, he wasn't the best of friends with the hot-tempered detective, but the man was important to Olivia, and Fin would do anything for her. Even be that shoulder in case Elliot needed it.

As he listened to the conversation between present and former ADA, he inserted himself into the banter. "It took us a few tries, Case."

Casey turned to Fin, raising her eyebrows. He elaborated, "After you, we went through-let's see…" He looked over at Munch, who was sitting on Elliot's other side, hand on his shoulder, reassuring. The two shared a knowing glance, before Fin continued. "I think three ADA's, before Jo stepped in. Most promising we've had since you left."

Casey smiled at her friend, then looked back at Jo. "I guess congratulations are in order," she told the woman. "It takes a lot to be able to keep up with these heathens."

"Hey," Munch complained. "On behalf of all of us, I resent that."

"Shut up, Munch," Casey, Fin, and Cragen replied at the same time. They shared a grin, which disappeared quickly as the silence descended.

"So…." Casey tried to think of something to say, but she didn't know what. What do you say after two years, seeing your former colleagues again in a hospital waiting room, while one of their own was fighting for her life?

Not being able to think of something to say that wouldn't sound completely vapid and fake, she lapsed into an awkward silence.

Melinda looked at the woman. They hadn't interacted a whole lot on the job, but she respected the former ADA and had considered her to be a friend. Now, noticing her unease, she decided to step in.

Melinda stood up from her position next to Cragen, directly across from the statue formerly known as Elliot Stabler, and looked around the room.

"I think we could all use some coffee, am I right?"

Upon receiving grateful nods from the captain, Fin, Munch, and Jo, she looked at the former ADA. "Casey, would you like to join me?"

Casey stared at Melinda for a moment, slightly shocked. She had always liked the ME, but she had never really spent much time with her, on or off the job. She recognized this gesture, however, as a welcome back, a peace offering, and a way to avoid any more awkward conversation with 'the guys', and smiled.

Gratefully, she nodded. "Sure, I'll give you a hand." She stood up and joined Melinda.

Melinda looked back at the rest of the group. "We'll be back soon." Together, the two left the room.

In their wake, total silence descended.

Jo drifted over to the now vacant seat next to the captain, and was boring a whole in the wall behind Elliot's left shoulder, being afraid catch her former partner's eye.

It was unnecessary though, as he had yet to look up from his current position, staring at the floor. Cragen was watching him worriedly; he wanted to reassure the man, but he didn't know how. The words just wouldn't come.

Elliot was beyond coherent thought by now. He had recognized the arrival of Casey, but he couldn't be sure of anything she had said. Munch and Fin were on either side, seeming to prop him up, solid beings that anchored him to the here and now.

He couldn't make sense of the trivial conversation around him. He didn't know what was going on. He couldn't think around the sound of Olivia flat lining in that ambulance. He didn't know if he would ever get that sound out of his head.

A single tear escaped his eye, rolling down his cheek, glistening sadly, and dropped to the floor.

_Yet another chapter done! These just keep coming._

_Next chapter we'll find out how Olivia is doing, what's going on. Maybe some Melinda/Casey moments, we don't really see those a lot, what do you guys think?_

_And for those more nitpicky people (god knows I'm one of them myself), I know Casey says she and Olivia meet up once a week, then she says she went to Africa for months; I meant that while Casey was in New York, they met up. Casey was in Africa for a few months, and when she got back, she and Olivia continued to see each other._

_And look for another return of a former character soon! Those of you who caught it might recognize the set up, but I was asked, and I live to serve._

_Reviews are my friend! =]_


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: if it was mine, you'd see Elliot and Olivia doing the tango after hours across their desks! Now that's a scene I'd like to see =]**

Melinda put her money on the counter and picked up one of the coffee carriers. With a smile to the cashier, she turned away and headed not towards the cafeteria exit, but towards an empty table. Casey, grabbing the remaining coffees, followed her, confused.

Melinda sat down and looked up at her former colleague. "I thought maybe we could talk for a minute," she said in way of explanation.

Casey still looked confused, but she sat down across from the ME. "What's on your mind?" she asked.

Melinda sized up the former ADA. "I just thought it would be nice to catch up a bit." Seeing the puzzled look, she added, "I know we didn't interact a whole lot on the job, but I still consider us friends, and I missed you."

Casey looked incredulous. "You did?"

Melinda smiled. "Of course. You were so much better at wrangling Elliot and Olivia than any of the temps they've paraded through those doors in the last two years."

Casey laughed. "I don't know how good I was at _wrangling_, but it's nice to hear."

Melinda paused, considering what she should say. She wanted to give the woman some hint as to what had been going on since she had left, but she didn't want to betray any trusts. Olivia had told her things in confidence, and Melinda treasured that. She knew the detective didn't share easily, so for her to entrust any secrets was the highest form of compliment. But this woman was Olivia's friend too. She deserved to know, didn't she?

Finally Melinda sighed. Maybe if she could steer the conversation in a different direction, she wouldn't have to say anything.

Casey watched the ME carefully. Just because she hadn't been in the courts for two years didn't mean she had lost any of her lawyer skills, including the ability to read people. She could tell the woman was conflicted, but she didn't know about what.

"It's been pretty rough," Melinda finally broke the silence. "After you left, there was a lot of tension. Your replacement, Kim, didn't get on very well with anyone."

Casey smiled. "Liv mentioned that. She said the woman had no empathy, couldn't relate to the victims, and had no comprehension of how SVU works…And those were her good qualities."

Melinda chuckled. "That sounds about right." She took a sip of her coffee before continuing. "She went back to DC, and Alex returned, briefly. Things calmed down a bit after that, everyone seemed more relaxed."

Casey nodded. "That's good. I know Olivia missed her while she was in WPP."

Melinda kept going. "Yeah, they all did. Alex was close to all of them." Looking up at Casey now, she thought she saw something like hurt flash across her face. Guessing the reason for this she hurried to console the woman. "Hey, they all liked you too. You were her replacement, so they might have been a little hesitant, seeing as how they saw you as taking the place of a fallen colleague, but they warmed up eventually. And they really missed you after you left."

Casey tried to smile, but she wasn't sure it came out quite right, because Melinda didn't look any less worried. "I know," she assured her friend. "It took a while, but I passed the Benson and Stabler test in time, so I consider that a victory. Those two scared the shit out of me when I first started working with SVU."

Melinda chuckled. "They do have a habit of doing that." Casey laughed with her as she continued. "Once upon a time they scared me too. Best of friends if they like you, but heaven help you if you get on their bad side."

"But they're supposed to like you," Casey told the ME. "You help them find evidence. I was the one telling them I couldn't get a warrant to search an apartment, or saying that I couldn't make a case to put away a pedophile. I was a lawyer, and the police are hardwired to hate lawyers."

"Defense lawyers," Melinda corrected. "You were a prosecutor. You were there to help them catch the bad guys."

Casey just looked at the ME. "Try telling an angry Stabler that you can't arrest a child rapist and murderer that you all know is guilty, but you just can't prove it."

Melinda conceded. "You've got a point there."

"Yeah," Casey laughed. "But after a while, I gained some ground." She paused briefly. "Liv seemed to take the first step, and I think she put in a good word for me with Elliot, 'cause he seemed to mellow out after the first time Liv and I met up outside of work and actually tried to get to know each other."

"Yeah, Liv certainly knows how to handle her partner," Melinda agreed.

Casey looked up slyly. "So, have they…"

Melinda interrupted, laughing. "Are you kidding? It doesn't even matter that Elliot's getting divorced-again, though it's really going to happen this time, I think. Those two are so ignorant! It would take a miracle for Elliot to admit he loves his partner, and I'm not even sure if Olivia knows how in love she is with Elliot."

Casey agreed, "A miracle…or a tragedy."

Both women stopped smiling immediately and Melinda rushed to fill the silence. "She'll be fine. Liv's tough."

Casey looked down, briefly, before returning to meet the gaze of the woman in front of her. "You were there, right?" Melinda nodded. "In your expert doctor's opinion, you think she's going to be OK?"

Melinda paused briefly. She didn't want to lie, but she couldn't acknowledge the possibility that Olivia wouldn't be all right.

"I _have_ to believe that she'll be OK."

Casey nodded. "Thank you for your honesty."

Melinda managed to form a half smile. "Try to think of the positives, right?" Seeing Casey agree, she decided to move on, to other, less depressing conversation. "I think we got a little diverted from our original topic."

Casey laughed, appreciating the change in subject. "By all means, please continue."

Melinda nodded. "So, Alex left, the next ADA was an alcoholic-"

Casey cut in, "That was Sonya Paxton, right?" Melinda confirmed, and Casey shook her head. "I got the impression that she and Liv didn't get along well."

Melinda smiled and nodded. "I'm told she was much the same as Kim, in the no empathy department. After the alcoholism came out, yes, Liv was merciless."

Casey just kept shaking her head. "Amateurs," she muttered under her breath, but Melinda heard her.

"You got that right," she commented, before continuing with her update. "When Alex returned again after that, I think everyone was happy."

Casey cut in. "But she didn't stay long, right? She left again after a couple of months."

Melinda looked at Casey, and confirmed. "She joined an international task force prosecuting sex crimes in underprivileged countries. Jo arrived not long after Alex left. She seems to be holding her own. _And_ she's got the dynamic duo's approval." She paused, before adding, "Being Elliot's old partner probably didn't hurt."

Casey smirked. "I think Liv was jealous when she came in. Not that she said anything outright, of course."

Melinda looked surprised. "What makes you think that? She never mentioned anything to me."

Casey raised her eyebrow. "Elliot's former partner comes back, he never mentioned she was a woman, I think Liv felt slightly pushed to the back burner." She took on a Cheshire cat look. "It might have had something to do with Jo asking Olivia if she had ever slept with Elliot."

Melinda gasped. "She didn't."

Casey grinned. "I think it's safe to say Olivia was more than slightly derailed. She tried _way_ too hard to convince me that the thought had never crossed her mind." She stopped there, pensive, before continuing thoughtfully, "Although maybe she was trying to convince herself."

Melinda smiled with Casey. Maybe Olivia was starting to realize her feelings. Then her smile faded. Fat lot of good it did if she never got the chance to express them.

Casey noticed the distant expression, and she had a pretty good idea of what caused it. "Hey, like you said, think positive, right?

With a tremendous effort, Melinda put a smile on her face. "Right," she replied. She tried to shake off the depressing attitude, and succeeded briefly, before her previous contemplative thoughts returned in the silence that followed. She was still thinking about Olivia's attitude and state after Casey had left, and wondering how much to tell the woman.

Casey noticed Melinda turn pensive, much like she had when they first sat down. She didn't know what was going on, but she could tell something was on the ME's mind.

"What's up, Melinda?" she asked.

Melinda looked startled. "What do you mean?" she replied. She knew what Casey was talking about, the woman _was_ a lawyer after all, her investigative skills had to be pretty good, but she tried to deflect anyway.

Casey gave her the classic 'don't even _think_ about claiming that you don't know what I'm talking about' look. "Come on, Mel. You're thinking about something, and it's gotta be important."

Melinda sighed. "I should never try to get anything past a lawyer," she deflected. When she met Casey's gaze, she saw the 'don't try to deflect' written in them. She sighed again. "It's nothing," she tried to say.

Casey cut her off. "Then why won't you tell me?" she reasoned. "You've been filling me in on facts, straight up details, but I wanna know what's been going on. Liv never really gave anything intimate, you know?" It was her turn to sigh. "We would meet and talk, but she never really _said_ anything, if that makes sense."

Melinda was nodding. That made perfect sense, with the little details she had managed to gather from her friend. "She got pretty distant, from everyone. Even Elliot. It seems like she's been coming back, slowly, but I think she's trying to create space, cut off her attachments to the world around her."

Casey looked worried. "Why?" she questioned.

Melinda looked into her coffee cup, paying way too much attention to the waves and swirls in the brown liquid. She didn't know what to say that wouldn't betray Olivia's trust.

"Melinda?" Casey was concerned. She had noticed Olivia being more distant every time they met up, and then she had left for Africa and hadn't seen her friend for months. When she had come back, things weren't the same. She had noticed the space, but hadn't wanted to say anything, just thinking that maybe there was a rough case, and that Olivia would tell her if it was something she wanted her friend to know.

Melinda shook her head. "I'm sorry, Casey. You know how Olivia is; she doesn't just share anything with anyone. I don't really _know_ what's going on. I have my theories, of course, but as they're unsubstantiated, I don't feel right talking about them."

Casey nodded, disappointed. "I understand," she said quietly. "Is there anything you _can_ tell me?"

Melinda deliberated. She didn't know what Olivia had told the ADA, or what the ADA had figured out on her own, so she didn't know what to say now. "I think it started after Sealview," she said carefully, watching for any sign of recognition. Instead, all she got was confusion.

"Sealview?" Casey asked. _Shit_. She had asked Olivia what had happened, and never got a satisfactory response. The woman insisted that nothing had happened, but she knew better. People reader, remember? Olivia was a good liar, heaven knows she had had enough practice growing up, but Casey was trained as well, and she knew the woman.

"What happened at Sealview?" she questioned quietly.

Melinda mentally slapped herself. She had been the first person Olivia had opened up to, and now Melinda was regretting that. Casey didn't know anything, _shit,_ and now she was going to start asking questions. Melinda wasn't even sure if Olivia had told her partner yet. The only person she knew for sure knew the details was Fin, only because he was there. It wasn't the sort of thing the detective would willingly share with anyone.

_Olivia, did he rape you?  
I__t's the closest I've ever come._

The closest I've ever come. "The closest I've ever come," Melinda whispered under her breath.

Casey looked confused. "What?" she asked.

Melinda looked up. "Nothing," she sighed. "I think whatever did or didn't happen is for Olivia to share, whenever she's ready."

Casey nodded and tried not to look disappointed. "I understand," she said.

Melinda shook herself out of her reflective thoughts and stood up. "We should probably get these coffees back to everyone before they get any colder."

Casey laughed and followed suit, smiling. "I'm not sure if they can get any colder," she joked.

Chuckling the two women made their way out of the cafeteria, back to the somber waiting room, mentally bracing themselves for the change in atmosphere. Slowly, as they walked, the reality crashed down upon them once more, and their thoughts returned to the injured detective, hoping, _praying_, that there would be good news waiting for them when they returned to their friends.

_Ok, I know I said I would give more info on Olivia's condition in this chapter, but alas, it got away from me! The conversation between Melinda and Casey just took off and came out a lot longer than I meant it to. Next chapter though, I promise._

_I got a request to do some Melinda/Casey moments, so I try to deliver. I hope it didn't seem like it was rambling too much. I wanted them to sort of bond over their common friend (Olivia) but I'm not sure I succeeded, or if this was just a long and boring chapter that I really didn't need to add. Either way though, it's an update!_

_This might be the last new chapter until next week, since I'm going out of town. I'll try, but no guarantees, so enjoy!_

_R&R!_


	11. Chapter 11

**Longest chapter yet!**

**Disclaimer: everything you recognize belongs to Dick Wolf and NBC**

Six hours, forty three minutes, since Melinda and Casey had returned to the waiting room and the group had taken up a sort of silent vigil. Seven hours, thirteen minutes, since Doctor Stevens had informed them that they couldn't operate quite yet.

The mood was restless. The Chief of Detectives himself had already called Cragen to let him know he would handle the reassignment of detectives from other precincts to SVU, so that they could all stay at the hospital until Olivia was out of the woods.

Melinda, Casey, and Jo had drifted towards each other, and were speaking quietly; nothing important was discussed, it was just filler conversation, fluff that didn't really matter.

Cragen had returned from his phone call to the same seat, still watching Elliot worriedly, occasionally catching eyes with Munch and Fin, who still made a protective barrier, sitting on either side of the detective. None were talking, but worry emanated almost visibly from the detective, sergeant, and captain.

And Elliot? The doctor had taken Elliot to donate blood while Melinda and Casey had gotten the coffee. Since his return, he had yet to move from his current position. He was still staring at the wall, full cup of cold coffee sitting on the floor next to his left foot.

"Seven hours," Munch finally broke the silence.

The quiet chatter of the girls stopped as they turned their attention to him.

"You'd think someone would have let us know what's going on by now," Fin added, agreeing.

Cragen sighed. He was worried about the time lapse too, but as captain he felt it was his job to be the rock, the calm one, in this storm.

"I'm sure they'll tell us as soon as she's stable enough to return to surgery," he tried to reassure everyone. Looking around the room, he could see it didn't work. The room lapsed back into an uncomfortable silence for a few minutes.

Melinda left the group of girls and walked over to Elliot. She was worried, she hadn't seen him move in almost six hours. That was not normal.

Kneeling in front of him, she tried to catch his eye. "Elliot?" she said quietly.

No response.

"Elliot, come on, look at me. Please," Melinda all but begged.

Elliot still didn't speak, but his eyes flickered up to the ME's face, and she felt her heart lift slightly. At least she knew he could hear her.

She kept trying. "Elliot, you should eat something. Come on," she pleaded, "let's go to the cafeteria."

Elliot didn't make any attempt to move, but he was still looking at Melinda, so she knew he was paying attention.

"Elliot, just for a little bit," she reasoned. "I've got my cell phone, if there's any news, you guys will call, right?" she asked, looking at the surrounding men, who all nodded forcefully. They were glad that Melinda was trying to bring Elliot out of this fog. He had been a statue for the better part of six hours, with no signs of coming out of it any time soon. They had all passed worried a long time ago, and were now on afraid that something was wrong with him.

Furthermore, Melinda seemed to be succeeding; though Elliot made no sounds of recognition or agreement, he allowed himself to be hauled up to his feet by the ME, who was stronger than she looked, and slowly led towards the doors.

Melinda looked back and caught Casey's eye. Wordlessly, the former ADA joined the duo at the door, and left with them.

The remaining four looked incredibly relieved.

"Thank god." Fin was the first to speak. "I thought he was never going to move again."

Munch smiled slightly. "Can you blame him, really?" he queried.

Fin shook his head. "I guess not," he replied.

Munch glanced at the captain for a minute, trying to decide if the CO should hear any suggestions of the topic he wanted to broach. He met Cragen's eye, and decided it probably wouldn't hurt. Hell, the man probably knew all about it, and had his own suspicions to add.

"You think this is what it'll take for Elliot to tell her he loves her, already?" he asked to the room at large.

Silence greeted his inquiry. They all looked at Munch, who was sitting innocently, as if he had not ventured into the land of the great taboo question.

Jo, who had drifted over to the guys after Melinda and Casey had left, spoke up. "So, I'm not the only one who thinks they're in love?"

All eyes turned to Jo next, and Fin shook his head. "Of course not," he answered her. "You haven't heard about the pool?"

Cragen looked at his detective. "I'm not sure I should be around to hear this conversation," he cut in.

Munch stared at the captain. "Why not?" he asked. "It's not like it's substantiated, this is all just speculation."

Cragen smiled and shook his head. "Still," he replied, "I wouldn't want to hear something that might force me to split up my two best detectives."

"Best detectives?" Fin muttered under his breath, but everyone heard him. "And what are the conspiracy nut and I? Chopped liver?"

Munch reached up innocently and hit the back of his partner's head. "Quiet," he commanded. "Dad's talking. We all know you have such deep rooted insecurities, but if you could keep them in for now, we'd all be appreciative."

Fin glared at his partner. Before he could speak, however, Munch cut in again.

"And it's alternative theorist, to you."

Fin just shook his head. "Geez, man, I was just kidding."

Cragen smiled at the pair. "Whatever those two may or may not feel is for them to sort out. I don't want to know anything that I will knowingly have to lie about later, so let's not discuss it."

Everyone looked at Munch accusingly, since he had been the one to initiate the conversation.

He put up his hands in surrender. "All right!" he cried. "I was just saying, after something like this, if the man doesn't tell her the truth, he's an even bigger idiot than I thought."

"Bigger idiot?" Fin asked.

"Well, yeah," Munch reasoned. "See, an idiot wouldn't let Liv get away for eleven years. A bigger idiot wouldn't go through something like this, almost lose her, and not have the guts to tell her how he feels."

"We get it, John," Cragen said.

And with that, the room fell silent again. Everyone retreated into their own thoughts, unknowingly thinking the same thing. One: if something like this didn't bring those two together, nothing would. And two: yes, Munch was right-if Elliot didn't realize how short life was, how little time there really was to spend with the ones you love, after all of this, he really was an idiot.

* * *

Melinda and Casey led Elliot to the cafeteria. Melinda had yet to let go of Elliot's arm, and Casey had subtly grasped his other hand, squeezing reassuringly.

When they arrived at their destination, Melinda stopped, effectively halting the group, who were all attached, and turned to Elliot.

"Why don't you sit down, and I'll bring you something?" She waited for a response, but got nothing.

Casey and Melinda locked gazes, and Casey nodded slightly, telling the ME she understood. Melinda maneuvered her arm out of Elliot's lock, and walked towards the food.

Casey led her friend over to an empty table, and sat him down. Quietly she walked around to the other side and sat across from him. Folding her arms on top of the table, she stared at the detective, studying him. He was trying to avoid meeting her gaze, and was staring studiously at a scuff in the table next to her right elbow.

Casey didn't know what she should say. Should she try and make small talk? Chat about random subjects that couldn't matter less in the grand scheme of things? Or should she try and say something reassuring? Problem was, she didn't know what to say, what would make Elliot feel better. She didn't think there was anything that _could_ be said to make him feel better.

Casey opened her mouth, paused, and then closed it again. She clasped her hands together in front of them and studied them, as if, if she looked at them hard enough, or long enough, they would tell her what to say.

They sat together in awkward silence until Melinda returned, balancing several sandwiches and bottles of water for the three of them.

Melinda set the food in front of her companions and slid in next to Elliot. One glance at Casey told her nothing had been said in her short absence.

"Eat, Elliot," she encouraged.

Mechanically, as if he wasn't aware of his own body's actions, Elliot obediently lifted the sandwich to his mouth and took a bite. Robotically he chewed, swallowed, and set the sandwich back on the plate. Melinda opened one of the bottles of water and handed it to him. Dutifully, he drunk, before replacing that, too, on the table in front of him. He still hadn't said a word.

Melinda sighed. She wasn't sure what to say here, but she knew that false assurances would likely be met with violence. She did know Elliot, after all. Maybe that was all she needed; what would Elliot want to hear?

"I'm not going to tell you everything's going to be OK," she said abruptly.

Casey looked at her, shocked. This was the woman who had, just a few hours ago, told her to focus on the positives. And what was she doing? Wasn't keeping the air optimistic the most important thing? She didn't need to tell Olivia's partner that it might not be OK, _especially_ when that partner is Elliot, one of the most temperamental and impulsive detectives she'd ever met.

But here Melinda was, harshly filling the air with reality, not something any of them wanted to hear right now.

Melinda saw Casey looking at her incredulously. And she had a pretty good idea of what that look meant; maybe Casey was right, she thought. This isn't something any of them _wanted_ to hear, but studying Elliot now, she thought maybe he _needed_ to hear it.

She continued, her voice much quieter, almost reflective. "Don't make promises you can't keep."

That finally seemed to reach through the fog surrounding Elliot, for he turned to look at her now, questioningly. Casey was wearing a similar expression.

Melinda smiled, and explained. "That's what Liv told me, in the morgue." She looked down, and the smile left her face. "I told her she was going to be fine, and she told me not to make promises I couldn't keep." She looked at Elliot again, and met his gaze unflinchingly. "I won't."

Elliot nodded, almost imperceptibly. He appreciated her honesty. All anyone had been telling him, for hours now, was that Olivia was going to be OK. Elliot considered himself to be something of a realist, especially right now. As much as he hated the possibility, he knew it was very likely that Olivia wouldn't be OK. She had been on the rocks even before they had arrived at the hospital, and everything the doctor had said just highlighted the fear that she would die. He didn't even want to think the thought, but it had been in his head for a while now, ever since arriving, and every time somebody told him she would be fine, he just wanted to punch something.

Melinda caught the gratitude that flashed in his eyes, and she smiled internally. It was good to know that she had said something right. She wondered if she could get him to open up at all; maybe it would be easier here, away from his fellow detectives. They were constantly at each other's throats, whether it was serious or joking, they probably weren't the best to open up to. Come to think of it, she thought, Olivia was really the only one he shared with. Melinda knew Olivia valued that sanctity more than anything.

"We just have to believe in Olivia right now, right?" She kept his gaze. She saw something in his eyes, but she couldn't identify it.

"Liv's tough. She's not going down without a fight." Casey seemed to have finally understood what Melinda was doing, and she was trying to help.

Elliot's eyes were drawn back to the table, but he was very appreciative, more so than he was willing to admit to the two women. They weren't lying to him, they weren't BSing him, they were simply stating facts. They were trying to instill confidence, without saying something stupid that might not be true. And Elliot had always trusted Olivia. He knew she would do whatever she could to stay with him. Casey was right. She wasn't going down without a fight.

"I don't think I can live without her," he finally spoke, for the first time in seven hours, his voice slightly hoarse from lack of use.

Melinda and Casey stared. Was he finally admitting to his feelings? What did that statement mean?

Melinda was overjoyed that her idea had worked. She had finally gotten Elliot to speak, to come back to the reality surrounding him.

"What do you mean, Elliot?" Casey decided to just go for broke, see what she could get out of the distraught detective.

Elliot tiredly looked up at Casey. "I can't live without her," he adamantly stated, conviction growing with each passing second. "We've been partners for over eleven years, she knows me better than Kathy ever did, she makes me feel more alive than I did in almost twenty years of marriage; I lo-" Elliot stopped short and looked from former ADA to ME. Both were wearing similar Cheshire cat smiles.

"You what, Elliot?" Melinda innocently asked.

Elliot just looked at her. He couldn't believe he had said all that. Great. No taking it back now. But, he thought, did he want to? After all of this, if he got the chance would he tell Olivia how he felt?

"I love her," Elliot breathed, almost too quiet to hear.

But Melinda and Casey did, and they were ecstatic. 'Finally!' was the prominent thought on both their minds.

"I love her," Elliot stated again, still quietly, as if he was talking to himself, "I can't believe it took all of this for me to realize it." He looked up then, and saw the grins the two women were wearing. He sighed, and a distant corner of his mind wondered just who would win that stupid office pool. "I guess I'm just the last one to figure it out, huh?" he asked, defeated.

Melinda shook her head. "Oh no," she reassured him. "There's one other person who has no idea."

Elliot looked at her. "Liv," he questioned, thought it was more of a statement. Melinda nodded, still smiling. "I guess I should consider that a good thing." He looked a little disappointed, and Melinda just looked confused.

"Why's that?" she asked.

"Well, if she knew, she'd probably want another partner," Elliot reasoned.

Casey and Melinda gave him their best 'are you frickin' stupid?' look. Casey looked at Melinda.

"He really is clueless, isn't he?" she asked the ME.

"Yup," Melinda confirmed.

Elliot looked from one to the other. "What are you talking about?" he asked.

"Your partner has defended you from the brass, countless times, saved your ass, again countless times, put your own problems ahead of yours; hell, she even tried to help you get back with your wife, because she thought that's what _you_ wanted!" Casey was really starting to wonder how much of an idiot this man was. He really had _no_ idea? Not possible.

"She was being a good partner, a good friend," Elliot tried to explain. "She tried to help me and Kathy reconcile, she always just wanted to be a friend." He looked at the two women. "Right?"

"Clueless!" Casey was exasperated. She spoke slowly, as if that would help more. "Elliot, did you not once see how much it was killing her when you and Kathy were trying to work things out?"

Elliot just stared. What? His mind was buzzing. What was Casey talking about? Olivia was just being a friend, right? She was just trying to help.

Casey sighed. "Elliot, Olivia loves you. She's in love with you. And if she knew I told you that, she'd kill me, so this conversation? Never happened."

Elliot opened his mouth to speak again, but they were interrupted by the buzzing of a cell phone. Melinda took the phone out of her pocked and stared at it.

"It's Cragen," she rushed, before answering it. "Hello?...OK, we'll be right there…yes, he did…OK, see you in a few minutes."

She closed the phone and looked at her companions. "Doctor Stevens is there. Cragen asked her to wait until we got back."

Casey and Elliot nodded and stood up hurriedly. They rushed to clear the table, and threw out the, still mostly intact, sandwiches on their way out of the cafeteria and back up to-hopefully-good news.

_Wow, again I said I'd get back to how Olivia's doing, and again, I didn't. Sorry! It's coming, I promise, but there are just so many ways I keep thinking to draw this out! It's just too easy to get sidetracked with another scene or a conversation. I promise, next chapter I'll get back to Olivia._

_This one is especially long. I was going to stop before the cafeteria scene, but I figured I'd grace you with an extra long update, since it'll be a few days before I get another one to you._

_Enjoy! And please review!_


	12. Chapter 12

**Wow, thank you all soooo much for the wonderful reviews! You're all totally boosting my self esteem and confidence. **

**Disclaimer: not mine!**

When the waiting room doors opened, Cragen's eyes went straight to Elliot. He looked…better. More alive, somehow. Cragen breathed a quiet sigh of relief. He wasn't sure what Melinda and Casey had said to him, but he thanked them wholeheartedly. Maybe he could just get his detective back after all.

Doctor Stevens was standing off to the side, making notes on a clipboard. When she heard the door open, she looked up. Recognizing Elliot and Melinda from her previous visit to the waiting room, she smiled wanly.

"Detective Stabler, right?" she asked. On seeing his nod, she continued, now speaking to the whole group, all of whom had gathered around the doctor. "I'm sorry it took so long," she started. "We managed to get Olivia stabilized a few hours ago. We took her into surgery, and were able to extract the bullet." She paused briefly, and almost _saw_ the air lighten at that news. "It nicked her kidney and liver, and lodged in her spleen, which we had to remove, but there shouldn't be any long term effects." As she continued, she noticed the tension return with the less than stellar news. She didn't want to have to tell them this, but she knew the last few hours had been like hell. She paused, not quite knowing how to continue, but knowing it needed to be said. "Detective Benson lost a lot of blood," she started delicately. "She wasn't in good shape when she came in, like you know, and she had a lot of internsal and external bleeding. She coded again in surgery." She heard the collective gasp and rushed to continue. "But like I said, she made it through alive and-relatively- in one piece." She looked around the group; no one seemed to find her poor attempt at humor at all funny. She sighed. This group was much more tightly knit than she had thought originally. She really felt for them. "When she wakes up, we'll have a better idea of any long term effects. Her brain was oxygen deprived for several minutes, so we won't know what kind of damage there is, until she wakes."

The room was silent after the doctor finished. They were all still processing.

Olivia was going to be OK? Cragen was relieved. He couldn't bear to lose his favorite detective-yes, while he pretended to care equally about all of his detectives, the truth was he nursed a special place in his heart for Olivia. He was also relieved that he wouldn't lose two detectives in one go; he knew without a doubt that if Olivia hadn't made it, Elliot would follow soon after.

Munch felt like crying. He didn't, of course, but he was so happy that Olivia was still alive, he considered quietly excusing himself, so that he could have some dignity.

Casey and Melinda actually _did_ cry. They had all been hoping for the best, but preparing for the worst. Hearing now that Olivia had made it out of surgery, minus one spleen, alive, and most likely back to work a week before the doctor gave her the OK, they felt like nothing could bring them down.

Jo was relieved as well. She had felt a bit like an outsider in the group the whole time; they were all friends, had known each other for years, and with the arrival of Casey, she had felt pushed to the side a bit. But she liked Olivia, and was glad the woman was going to be OK. Some portion of her felt that this was partly her fault. If she hadn't been so stupid, none of this would have happened. Jo sighed internally. She might need to make an apology eventually.

Fin put his hands over his face and rubbed his eyes. He was subtly trying to get rid of the tears forming, under the guise of being exhausted. His little sister, his baby girl, was going to be all right. He heard the doctor, he understood that there was still some doubt, some fear that there would be long-term effects, but right now she was alive. And that was all they wanted.

Elliot, who had gone back to being the statue when he had entered the room, began to thaw. His heart had stopped when he saw the doctor, but now, after hearing that Olivia was alive and well-mostly-he felt he could breathe again. He still hadn't moved, and Casey had silently grasped his hand and was squeezing reassuringly. He unknowingly squeezed back, grateful for her presence. He actually felt like he could smile now. His stomach seemed to be settling back, after hours of discomfort being lodged somewhere in his throat.

"Is there really a possibility of brain damage?" Cragen's question had been on all of their minds, but he was the first to voice it, noticing everyone stiffen as the words left his mouth.

Doctor Stevens sighed. "We won't know, officially, until she's awake. She was technically dead for two minutes, so there is a possibility-"she saw the panic and hurried, "but the fact that Olivia made it through the surgery is a very good sign. I wouldn't say you should jump for joy, but now is definitely the time for cautious optimism."

Most of them visibly relaxed at that. Only Elliot stayed rigid, not quite willing to let himself believe that she would be completely all right just yet.

"When will she wake up?" Melinda asked. She could see Elliot still worrying, and she hoped that if the doctor could give a rough estimate, he might calm down a bit.

Doctor Stevens sighed. "Definitely not today," she replied. "We actually don't want her to wake up just yet, since she just had a pretty major surgery. She's under some serious medication right now, and we'd like to keep her asleep until tomorrow. After that, it's up to her." Looking around ad their faces, especially Elliot's, she guessed what the next question would be, and answered it before it could be asked. "You can see her if you like, but only one at a time."

Everyone looked at Elliot.

"Why don't you go first, Elliot?" Cragen said, sympathetically.

Elliot nodded and followed the doctor out. The rest of the group looked at each other, wondering what to do next. They decided to give Elliot a few minutes alone first, before the rest of them went up.

Casey excused herself and walked into a corner, pulling out her ringing cell phone.

Everyone else sunk down into their chairs, smiling.

"Thank god!" Fin was the first to break the silence.

"Cautious optimism," Melinda gently reminded him. She was relieved too, but she didn't want to forget that there was still a long way to go, and Olivia wasn't out of the woods just yet.

"Come on, Melinda," Munch stressed, "we all know Liv, she'll fight tooth and nail to survive, right?"

They all nodded. None of them wanted to admit how scared they were at the doctor's words about possible brain damage.

Silence descended again, interrupted as Casey returned, still talking on her phone.

"The ICU waiting room…yeah, see you in a minute."

She hung up the phone and replaced it in her pocked, taking a seat next to Melinda. They all looked at her, questioning.

"Who was that?" Fin asked.

Casey smiled, and decided that a surprise would be more fun. She coyly answered, "A friend."

They all looked confused, but before they could say anything else, the waiting room doors opened again. As Casey's eyes shifted to the door, the rest followed. It was a collective gasp of surprise, and Casey's smile widened.

Cragen was the first to speak. "_Alex….?_"

_Am I really that cruel! This is shorter than I intended, but it seemed like a good chapter ending._

_Ask and you shall receive! I got the request, and I worked it in. Some of you may have caught the set up, and if you did, you're very smart! It will be explained in the next chapter, which I can put up at the same time!-thanks to weekend vacations, a book I don't really want to keep reading, an airport where you have to pay for wireless, and a long plane ride._

_Reviews are my friend!_


	13. Chapter 13

**As promised, two chapters at once!**

**Disclaimer: not mine!**

"Alex…..?" Cragen looked shocked, an expression that was mirrored on the faces of everyone else, with the exception of Jo, who had an idea of what was going on, but wasn't sure.

"Casey called me when she heard," Alex said in way of explanation, hurrying over to join the group. Melinda got up to give her a hug. When she sat down, Munch put his arm around her shoulders as an awkward hug, and Fin reached over to grasp her hand.

"Where have you been?" Fin asked.

"Africa," was the reply. "When I left you guys, I headed to Congo, to help prosecute sex crimes there." She looked at Casey, who was still smiling. Everyone followed her gaze to the redhead as well, as Alex kept talking. "I met Casey over there a couple of months ago. She was doing relief work, and we ran into each other." She smiled. "We met up a few times, before she headed back to New York." Her smile faded slightly. "I was on my way back home when Casey called me a few hours ago. She told me what had happened to Liv, and I told her I'd come straight to the hospital when I landed. Do you know how hard it is to get a cabbie to drop you off one place, and your bags somewhere else?"

That got a smile. They were all still processing.

"Why didn't you tell us you ran into Alex?" Munch asked Casey.

Casey shrugged. "I told Liv when I first got back," she replied. "And in here, it just didn't seem that important."

"So Casey said she's OK?" Alex was desperate for information. She had missed her friends, all of them, but Olivia the most. That woman had an uncanny ability to worm her way into anyone's heart and refuse to leave. Alex had been holding her breath ever since that phone call from Casey, which came as she waited to board her connecting flight out of Paris. The seven-hour flight had been torture. She needed to know, for sure, that Olivia was OK.

"The doctor just left," Melinda replied. "Olivia's out of surgery, not out of the woods yet, but, as she said, we should be 'cautiously optimistic'."

"She's going to be _fine_," Fin said forcefully, refusing to believe anything otherwise.

"Spleen-less, but fine," Munch added.

Alex looked confused.

"They had to remove her spleen," Cragen cleared the confusion.

Alex nodded. Noticing one person's absence now, she voiced the question. "Where's Elliot?"

"With Olivia," Munch and Fin replied at the same time.

Cragen added, "We thought we should give him a few minutes alone first."

Alex nodded. She pondered this; clearly she was missing something, between the looks that Casey and Melinda were shooting each other and the smile on Munch's face, but she could only guess as to the reasons behind it. She took in the small group slowly, relishing in the fact that she was home, _with her family_.

Alex started. Where had that thought come from? But being here now, she realized that it was true. These people had become her surrogate family, people that she looked forward to seeing, people that she had missed while in witness protection, and when she had left for Africa.

As her gaze moved, she noticed the addition of someone else, someone she did not recognize. But she could guess who the woman was.

"Let me guess," she said, staring at Jo with a small smile. "My replacement?"

Jo met her gaze and smiled back. "I guess so. ADA Jo Marlowe." She stuck her hand out for Alex to shake.

"Former ADA Alex Cabot," Alex took the offered hand, measuring. She didn't recognize the name, but she wasn't all that surprised. She had been out of the game for a while, and when she was here, it wasn't for that long.

Jo continued to stare at Alex. She had heard a lot about this woman, and was impressed. And once again, felt pushed to the side with the return of _another_ former ADA, another one favored over her. These people really didn't like outsiders that much, they were such a close group, and once somebody got into that group and left, anybody else who took their place just could not fit in. Jo was getting used to the sort of frosty friendship-they seemed to accept that she was there and on their side, but they didn't _like_ her. She was just a coworker to them; these people had been friends.

"Do you think we've given Elliot enough time?" Cragen broke the awkward silence that followed ADA meeting ADA.

Munch and Fin were on their feet instantly. Melinda and Casey followed more slowly, thinking that maybe they could stall a bit to give Elliot more time.

Together, the group headed out the doors and towards the elevator.

* * *

When the doctor led Elliot to Olivia's room, he didn't know what to expect. He assumed she would look like she was sleeping. As they stopped outside her door, Doctor Stevens paused. Even she could feel the worry emanating from this man, and she knew that, being partners, they had to be closer than just friends. With a smile and a 'it's going to be all right', she left the man at the door and walked away.

Elliot took a deep breath, and then pushed open the door to his partner's hospital room.

Stopping just inside the door, he stalled. She was so pale. And hooked up to monitors, IV's, and other machines, he almost couldn't believe it was Olivia under all of that. There was an incessant beeping in the background-the heart monitor, measuring out the beats of her heart. Elliot praised that noise; maybe it could drone out the noise of the flat line, the one that had been playing in his mind for hours now.

Walking slowly to the side of the bed, he looked down at his partner. He felt his throat close. She looked so innocent, fragile, like a single touch would break her. Sitting down in the seat that was conveniently placed bedside, he gently laid his hand over hers, squeezing ever so lightly. He couldn't stop staring at her face, her angelic face.

"Talk to her, honey."

The voice startled Elliot. He looked around to see a nurse walk into the room to hook up another IV. She continued, "She can hear you. Talk to her, it'll be good for her."

The nurse left, and Elliot was alone again. He wasn't sure what to say, so he decided to go with the truth. He didn't know if she would hear him or understand him, but he needed to say it.

"Hey, Liv," he started lamely. "Everyone else is OK. Sophie and Paul are both in custody, going away for a while, but we'll try to get Sophie a deal, since she was really innocent."

He was rambling by now, and he knew it. But he knew Olivia would want to know what was going on. She would even want to help plead Sophie out, even though the woman had shot her. Olivia would argue that it had been an accident, and they were all trying to get her to confess to murder at the time, so it was really no big deal.

Elliot smirked. _No big deal_. If- no, _when_ Olivia woke up, that would be exactly how she would describe getting shot.

He looked at her closed eyes, and willed them to open. They didn't. he squeezed her hand a little tighter, and kept talking.

"You need to wake up, Liv," he pleaded. "We need you. Fin and Munch, I don't think they can handle my anger and aggression without you there to keep me in line. And Cragen, you know how much you mean to him. Melinda misses you. Even Jo is worried." He smiled. Olivia and Jo hadn't really gotten off to the best start, but it _seemed_ like the two had formed a sort of cautious friendship, or at least seemed friendly with each other. "Casey's here," he continued. "Why didn't you tell me you were still seeing her? That you've kept in touch for the last two years?" He paused there, and realized that it sounded like he was blaming his partner. "I'm sorry," he corrected. "I didn't mean to chastise you. She's really worried. She needs you to wake up." He paused again for a longer stretch and pondered his next words carefully.

"_I_ need you to wake up," he said quietly. "I never wanted to admit it Liv, but I need you. I need you to be my buffer when a case gets me too worked up and I lash out. I need you to be there with a bag of takeout when I can't bear going back to an empty apartment. I need you to tell me the truth even when no one else will. I need you to _be_ there, sitting at that desk across from me, every day, when I come in in the morning. You're always there, Liv, and I always took that for granted. I-I…" he stuttered. His resolve waivered, but he needed to say this.

"I love you, Olivia," he stated firmly. "I have for a long time now, but I never really let myself think it. I was always too busy trying to save my failing, disastrous marriage. And you were always there, without fail, trying to help. Even if you didn't want to-to listen to my problems, even when you had your own, you were always there. Olivia, I'm in love with you, and I'm not afraid to admit it anymore."

He stopped, breathing heavily as if he had run a race. It had taken a lot out of him, to admit that to the object of his affection, but he felt vindicated. He had said it, whether or not she had heard it, and he couldn't take it back. The question was, would he be ready to repeat all of that when her eyes were open?

He felt a light pressure to his hand, and looked down, confused. Her hand was, ever so slightly squeezing him back. The pressure was so light he almost thought he imagined it, but when he looked again, he knew it was real.

The moment was interrupted when the door opened, and Cragen, Munch, Fin, Casey, Melinda, and Jo filed in, followed by…Alex?

Alex saw his surprise, and she smiled. "Just got back from Africa," she told him. "Casey called me."

He nodded. They were all slightly shocked to see their fallen comrade, _Bad-Ass Benson_, looking so frail.

"How is she?" Cragen asked.

Elliot looked back at his partner. He had yet to let go of her hand, and he looked much better than he had in the waiting room.

"She's going to be OK," he said positively. "I know she is."

Everyone seemed surprised at his confidence, but they knew better than to question the Benson/Stabler bond.

Doctor Stevens came in at that point, and chastised them for disobeying her orders. "I said _one_ person at a time!"

With mumbled sorries and guilty looks, she had to smile. "Olivia needs her rest, so I'm going to have to ask you to leave now. You can come back tomorrow, but please try to keep it to no more than two at a time."

She left them then, and the group all focused on Olivia. Fin quietly walked up to the bed and placed his hand on her shoulder briefly, squeezed, and then turned and walked out. Munch followed in the same manner.

Jo looked at Elliot uncomfortably, then back at Olivia. Without a word, she followed the sergeant and detective out of the room.

Cragen walked up to the bed and placed one hand on Olivia's arm, and the other rested on Elliot's shoulder. Gently he squeezed, and then followed everyone else.

Melinda, Casey, and Alex looked at each other briefly. Melinda moved forward and put an arm around Elliot's shoulders, hugging him awkwardly with one arm. Moving over to Olivia she gently swiped the hair off of her forehead. Her hand rested on the woman's cheek for a moment before she, too, left.

Casey and Alex mimicked Melinda's actions, both making sure to show Elliot their support. He had yet to look away from his partner's face since they had entered the room.

When it was just Elliot again, the doctor returned. She looked uncomfortably at him, trying to decide if she had the nerve to tell him to leave. Watching him watch his partner now, she decided she didn't. Doctor Stevens had been a doctor for a long time, and she had seen many different kinds of bonds. These two were more than friends, how much more she didn't know, but she could tell that Detective Stabler was the kind of man for whom the term 'visiting hours' would have no effect.

He looked up at her briefly, _daring_ her to tell him to leave. That look reinforced her decision. Nothing on earth would tear that man away from his partner's side.

"I won't even try to make you leave," she assured the man, who visibly relaxed at her words. "I know it would be futile. If you want a blanket or pillow, just let me or a nurse know." With that, she walked out, and Elliot was left alone again.

Left alone to watch his partner breathe. Her eyelids were motionless. Did that mean she wasn't dreaming? Could she dream with the drugs the doctors had given to keep her asleep? A tube was sticking down her throat, since she couldn't get enough oxygen on her own. Her hair was spread out like a fan on the pillow, a dark brown crown against the stark white of hospital linens.

She had never looked more beautiful.

_Sooooo, what do you think? Lots of writing today, two chapters! _

_Review for the next chapter!_


	14. Chapter 14

**Ok, somebody needs to tell my parents that writing this story is NOT a waste of my time. I mean, come on guys, this is my last free summer; this time next year I will be thrown out on my ass with a diploma and told that the rest is up to me. Can anybody really blame me for wanting to take a few weeks to just relax? After never taking a summer or winter break off, taking classes and working straight through for three years, is it so wrong that I have done pretty much nothing but watch TV, surf the net, and write this story for the last month? One month in three years? WTF!**

**Ok, ranting done, sorry for that but my dad's driving me insane, here's the next chapter!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything, Dick Wolf does. (*sob*, oh well, what can I do)**

"Daddy?"

Elliot started out of his light doze, and turned towards the voice, shocked as he saw his four oldest children enter the room.

"What are you guys doing here?" Elliot stood up and faced the door, trying to work out the kinks in his neck from sleeping sitting up in the uncomfortable hospital chair.

Maureen walked over to hug her father. "I was at the gym on campus, and I saw it on the news. I called Kathleen, and the two of us went over to mom's house to tell everyone else. We all wanted to come and see if Liv's OK." She paused briefly to let go of her father and look him in the eye. "Is she?" she asked worriedly.

Elliot looked from his oldest daughter to the three children behind her. All were wearing similar scared expressions. Elliot managed to force a smile for them; he knew they all loved Olivia like their own family. God knows she had been around enough to _be_ family.

He took a deep breath. "The doctor says they'll know more when she wakes up, but I think she's going to be OK."

"But she is going to wake up, right daddy?" Lizzie looked even more scared.

Elliot reached over to hug his youngest daughter. "The doctor says she will, honey," he reassured her. "The question is just when."

Kathleen walked over to Olivia's bedside and placed a hand on her arm. Silently Maureen joined her. Elliot watched his two oldest children while placing a hand around the shoulders of Lizzie and Dickie, drawing them close.

"How are you, dad?" Maureen asked, turning around to look at her father.

Elliot smiled. "I'm fine, honey," he replied.

Maureen raised her eyebrow incredulously. "I'm going to pretend you didn't just lie to us, and give you one more chance to answer."

Elliot sighed. It seemed he couldn't even get something past his kids. "I'll be fine," he said.

Maureen still looked skeptical, but she didn't press the issue. And when Elliot tried to change the subject, she complied.

"How's your mom doing?" he asked.

"She's all right," Kathleen answered. She still hadn't looked away from Olivia yet. This woman had done so much for her, and even though she had resented the detective at the time, she understood now that Olivia had done it all because she was worried, and because she loved her. Olivia had always tried to treat her like she would her own daughter, and Kathleen was worried sick.

Maureen expanded, "She's worried about Olivia too. She said she'd come by later, but she wanted us to call when we knew Liv was OK."

"We'll go do that," Dickie spoke up for the first time, looking from his older sister to his twin to his father.

Maureen nodded and smiled at her brother. Silently the twins extracted themselves from Elliot and left the room. Elliot walked back to the chair and sat down again. Maureen put a hand on his shoulder.

"Dad, tell us the truth, how bad is it?" she asked.

Elliot looked at his two oldest children, and was amazed at how grown up they were. They really weren't children any more. Both were grown up and turning into young women. He looked at Olivia now, and had to realize just how integral she had been in making that happen. If it hadn't been for Olivia, Elliot truly believed he would have lost Kathleen.

He sighed and put his face in his hands. "It was really bad, for a while," he answered, voice slightly muffled. "She flat lined twice, once in the ambulance, and once in surgery. The doctors are worried about potential brain damage."

Kathleen gasped and started crying. Maureen squeezed her father's shoulder even more tightly.

"She's going to be OK," Maureen firmly stated. "You know Liv would do anything to stay with you."

She started when she saw the expression in her father's eyes as he looked at her, a glazed look on his face. The way he was looking at Olivia; there was pure fear there, which was natural, but-_love_? Desire? Her eyes widened. For years, her mom had accused Elliot of having feelings for his partner, and he had always denied it. But now? She had to wonder just what had happened to make her father finally realize what everyone else, including his entire family, had known for years.

"Dad?" Elliot made an effort to focus on Maureen. She was looking mischievous and furtive.

Elliot was suddenly cautious. "Yeah, Mo?"

"What's going on between you and Liv?" she asked slyly.

Elliot looked startled. "What do you mean?"

"Oh, come on dad, you're looking at her like she's, I don't know, the love of your life or something. What happened?"

"Nothing," he whispered, defeated. "There's nothing between us."

Kathleen finally looked up at her father. "Do you want there to be?" she asked curiously.

Elliot looked between the two of them. "Yes," he finally admitted. "Olivia and I have always been best friends, and I promise you that I never cheated on your mother, no matter what she said, but somewhere along the way, I fell in love with Olivia." He looked back down at his partner, defeated. "And I never got the chance to tell her. I don't even know if she feels the same way."

Maureen and Kathleen shared a knowing glance with each other. "Of course she does, dad," Maureen said.

"What do you mean?"

"Come on, dad," Kathleen chimed in. "All of the things she's done for you, and for us? You really question it?"

"She was being a friend, a partner," Elliot tried to explain, but the kids weren't buying it. Elliot was suddenly shocked when he saw the look his children were giving him. It was the same 'you really are an idiot' look that Olivia had.

"Dad, come on." Maureen was exasperated. "A friend will give you a card on your birthday, maybe go to the occasional movie together. You and Liv spend days off together, go out to dinner together. She knows how to handle your moods, she's always put your needs above hers."

"She was there for me when I was throwing my life away, she saved Eli and mom's life," Kathleen chimed in. "She'd do anything for you dad."

"But that doesn't mean-" Elliot started, but Maureen cut him off.

"Dad, are you really that dense?" Maureen couldn't believe her father's idiocy sometimes. "She loves you! Why do you refuse to believe that?"

Elliot just looked at Olivia. He truly wanted to believe that she felt the same way as he did, but he just didn't think life could be that good.

Maureen saw the conflict waging in Elliot, and shook her head. "Well, you just think about that, dad," she said, resigned. "Is it OK if we stick around for a while?"

Elliot smiled at his daughter. He had always been glad that they were so fond of Olivia. "Of course," he replied, just as Dickie and Lizzie walked back in. They joined the group around Olivia's bed, subtly leaning into their father.

"Mom says she's glad Liv's OK," Dickie said. "She said she'd bring Eli by later today."

Elliot nodded and grasped his son's hand. "Thanks, guys," he said warmly. He looked back at Maureen. "Of course you can stay as long as you want."

His kids smiled. Dickie drew up another chair next to his father and sat down; Lizzie simply crashed in her father's lap, arm around his neck. Kathleen sat on one side of Olivia, while Maureen sat on the other. Each had grasped one of her hands, and refused to let go.

* * *

When Fin walked into the squad room, he looked around. The room was filled with strange faces, officers who had been temporarily reassigned from other precincts to help with the backlog while the detectives of SVU were preoccupied.

They all looked up as Fin entered. Whispering broke out in his wake as he crossed the room and entered the captain's office.

Cragen was sitting at his desk, looking ten years older than he had a few days ago. His head was in his hands, and it looked like he might be asleep. When Fin opened the door, he looked up, eyes bloodshot.

"What's up, Fin?" he asked tiredly.

Fin closed the door behind him and took a seat across from the captain. "Just thought I'd stop by for a bit before I head back to the hospital."

Cragen nodded. "We've got plenty of help here, thanks to the Chief of D's," he told his detective. "I've already been assured that we can spend as much time at the hospital as we need until Olivia wakes up."

He studied the man sitting in front of him; He doubted Fin had gotten any more sleep than he had.

"You look like hell," he commented. There was no emotion or infliction in his voice. It was just a statement, a fact.

Fin sighed and shook his head. "Thanks, Cap," he said dryly.

"No offense," Cragen added.

"You know, you don't look much better," Fin smiled.

Cragen nodded. "I know." He paused. "Where's your partner?"

"Home." Fin cleared his throat. "We left Elliot at the hospital, and Munch and I went home to change, maybe sleep. I couldn't, so I decided to come here, see if maybe I could do something useful."

"I think John had the same idea," Cragen observed, looking out the door window into the squad room, where Munch had just sat down at his desk, looking distant.

Fin turned around and noticed his partner. With a snort and a shake of the head, he stood up and nodded to his captain, then joined his partner.

"What happened to sleeping?" he asked as he approached.

Munch looked up, with the same defeated look that they were all wearing. "Same as you?" It was meant to be a statement, but came out as a question.

Fin nodded. "Needed to feel productive," he commented.

"Yeah," Munch agreed. He sat up straighter and tried to look busy. "So, do we have anything to do?"

Fin shrugged. "I don't know," he admitted. "It's not like we were going to get anything done anyway, right?"

Munch smiled. "Yeah, I guess not." He looked down at his desk, shuffling the papers there.

Cragen walked up to the pair unnoticed, and inserted himself into the conversation. "Go back to the hospital." They looked at him in confusion. He smiled slightly. "We all know you're not going to do anything constructive today, and you're more likely to screw up whatever you do work on, so get out of here. Go back to the hospital. I'll join you later this afternoon." Cragen turned around and walked back into his office.

Munch and Fin shared a look. Without a word, Munch stood up and the two of them left the squad room. All eyes followed them on their way out.

_Reviews are my friend!_


	15. Chapter 15

**Loving the reviews, guys, thank you so much! I'd really like to get up to 100 reviews, so keep 'em coming!**

**Disclaimer: Not mine!**

When Kathy entered the hospital, Eli hanging on to one shoulder, she headed straight up to ICU. Entering the waiting room, she wasn't surprised to see Munch and Fin sitting in a corner, full cups of coffee in their hands. She walked up to them with a smile.

"Kathy!" Munch stood up to grasp the woman's hand, surprised. "What are you doing here?"

"The kids told me Olivia was in the hospital," Kathy explained. "I wanted to stop by." She paused to set her bag down to take a firmer hold on Eli. She looked up at the detectives who worked with her husband, and was concerned at the expressions on their faces. They looked afraid, and she started to worry. She had thought that things were all right, but maybe she hadn't been given the whole truth when her kids had called her. "How _is_ Olivia?" she asked. "Dickie said she was going to be fine, is that true?"

Munch and Fin looked at each other, and then turned back to Elliot's soon to be ex-wife. "She's in a coma," Fin said gently. Kathy gasped. "She lost a lot of blood, and coded twice, and the doctor's are worried about potential brain damage."

Kathy looked even more scared. This was definitely worse than she had thought from the twin's phone call earlier that day. "How's Elliot?" she managed to choke out.

Munch and Fin shared another knowing glance. They knew that Kathy had to suspect Elliot's feelings, had probably suspected for years, but they didn't think this would be a good time to bring the subject up.

"He thinks she'll be all right," Munch said. "He's worried, but he seems to be OK."

"He wasn't for a while," Fin chimed in. "He was pretty out of it for the seven plus hours before the doctor told us she was out of surgery."

Kathy nodded. "What room?" she asked.

"215," was the response.

With a nod to the two cops, Kathy picked up her bag again and left the waiting room, heading down the hall to Olivia's room.

**XXX**

When she got to the door, she paused briefly, steeling herself to open it. Inside, she saw her soon to be ex, surrounded by their oldest children. Clearing her throat, she made her presence known.

Elliot turned around when he heard someone cough. When he saw Kathy standing just inside the door, looking uncomfortable. He nudged Lizzie to move so that he could stand up. Lizzie tiredly complied and moved over to share a seat with her brother. Elliot stood up to join his soon to be ex-wife, giving Eli a kiss on the cheek. He stood up straight and looked at Kathy uncomfortably.

Kathy smiled. "Hey," she said softly.

Elliot forced a smile back. "Hi," he replied.

They paused awkwardly, and Kathy looked around the room. Olivia was lying, pale and silent, on the bed, flanked by her oldest children. Maureen and Kathleen were lying down, apparently asleep, each grasping one of their father's partner's hands. Dickie was leaning to one side, eyes closed, but he had obligingly shifted in his seat to give his sister some room, so Kathy was pretty sure he was at least semiconscious.

"So, how are you?" Kathy asked lamely, turning back to her one-time husband.

Elliot stared at the woman in front of him. He had never thought that his marriage would end this amicably. But here his wife was, being supportive, genuinely worried about him. He found it rather ironic that he had had to deal with Kathy's accusations of his infatuation with his partner for the last eleven years, and now here he was, fully aware that she had been right all along; and she was here, comforting him while his partner was lying in a hospital bed, fighting for her life.

"I just need her to wake up," he admitted quietly. He turned and leaned back against the wall, crossing his arms and staring at Olivia. "I can't do this without her."

Kathy started. He had vehemently denied that he had any feelings for Olivia for eleven years. Every time she accused him, he would tell her that she was crazy, and that she was paranoid. It seemed now like something had changed.

Elliot looked at Kathy, and saw the look in her eyes; there was understanding, comfort, but also hurt and confusion.

"Kathy-"

"Elliot, don't," Kathy tried to cut him off.

But Elliot was determined to clear himself. "Kathy, I promise I never slept with Olivia."

Kathy nodded and smiled. "I believe you, El." She paused and looked at him sidelong. "So what's changed?"

Elliot stalled. What was he supposed to say? He was glad that Kathy was being so great about the divorce, but he didn't know how much he should share with her, especially where Olivia was concerned.

Kathy saw the debate waging, and decided to quell his fears. "It's OK, Elliot," she assured him. "I know."

Elliot saw the support in her eyes, and he smiled. "I can't believe it took all of this for me to realize how much I love her."

Kathy smiled back. It hurt, but she knew that she couldn't even begin to compete with Elliot's partner. Those two shared a bond that could not be rivaled. She would always love Elliot, he had given her five beautiful children, but now that she was being honest, she knew they had fallen out of love a long time ago. It was time to move on, to find a new life. Elliot deserved to be happy with someone he loved, truly and completely. And so did she.

"I really hope that she's OK," Kathy said, with a hint of sadness for a past happiness and a life that was really and truly over. "And Elliot? When she wakes up, don't hesitate." Elliot looked surprised. "Life is too short, right?" Elliot nodded, still shocked that she was being so nice and understanding. He watched as she shifted Eli further up in her arms and began to play with the wedding band she was still wearing. "Everyone deserves the chance to be happy." Elliot nodded again. "Even us?" Elliot couldn't identify the look Kathy was giving him now. It was like a mix of pain, hope, and sorrow. "Elliot, we both realized a long time ago, that this just wasn't _right_, this-" she gestured between the two of them, "just wasn't us. I will always love you, but she-" Kathy nodded towards Olivia, not noticing that her two oldest children had woken up and were listening to the conversation between their parents, "is _in_ love with you Elliot; I know it, everyone else knows it, it's time you realized it, and gave her what she deserves. Because she does deserve it, El. She deserves to be happy."

Elliot couldn't keep the astonishment out of his expression. "You're not mad?"

Kathy smiled painfully. "No, El, I'm not mad. Some part of me will probably always be jealous of her, for stealing you away from me; but Olivia saved my life, she saved Eli's, she got through to Kathleen when neither of us could, and she always made sure that you came home to me, safe and sound. She will always have my trust and my friendship." As Elliot watched, she removed the wedding band from her left hand and stuck it in her pocket.

Kathy turned to leave, but stopped as she pushed the door open, one foot out in the hall, and looked back at her ex-husband. "I mean it Elliot. Hold onto her and don't let her go. She's waited eleven years, don't make her wait any longer."

With that, Kathy left, and Elliot turned back to the bed, now noticing his four children awake; he looked around the room, and four identical smiles stared back.

"So, what are you going to do now, dad?" Maureen asked.

* * *

Casey, Alex, Melinda, and Jo paid for their lunch and found an empty table in the hospital cafeteria. Awkwardly they sat down and began to eat, pausing in between bites to size each other up. The three old friends were subtly watching the new ADA, studying her. Jo knew what they were doing, but she didn't say anything.

"So you were Elliot's old partner?" Casey broke the silence.

Jo looked up and smiled. "A lifetime ago, yes," she replied. "I was his training partner."

"So what was he like back then?" Alex asked, curiously.

"Eager to please," Jo laughed. "He was so ready to prove himself, to show his skills. He spent the better part of a year just trying to impress me." Jo paused to smile nostalgically. "Didn't succeed until he stopped kissing my ass and actually started thinking for himself."

"So you must have some embarrassing stories, right?" Alex chimed in.

Jo looked around the group. She could see what they were doing, and she was grateful. They were trying to include her in the conversation, where the three of them had known each other for years, and she was the newcomer. They were also studiously avoiding any conversation that might bring up Olivia's current condition.

Jo laughed. "First week as partners," she started, "this shoplifter runs out of a store right as we're passing. Elliot takes off after him, doesn't notice that the guy has a lookout-"

"I think I see where this is going," Melinda chuckled.

Jo nodded. "Face first into a pile of garbage."

The entire table burst out laughing.

"Please tell me I can use this against him," Casey sniggered once she got her breath back.

"Better yet, give it to Liv, she'll figure out a way to work it into a conversation," Alex suggested.

The table fell silent and awkward looks were traded.

"So, you must have some funny stories of Elliot and Olivia," Jo said, trying to break the silence.

The two former ADA's and Melinda looked at each other.

"Sorry," Jo tried to cover up, realizing that maybe it wasn't the best idea to bring Olivia into the conversation.

"No, it's OK," Casey assured her. "Elliot and Liv always work so well together, I don't really remember any funny screw ups-"

"Although the lesbian chick who hit on Liv was pretty interesting," Alex chimed in.

"Wait," Melinda interjected, "why didn't I hear about this?"

Alex laughed. "Apparently Liv gives off a 'gay' vibe." She paused briefly. "I never got that feeling, but then, I _was_ out of the picture for a while."

The table chuckled.

"What's so funny?" Fin asked as he and Munch walked up carrying trays of food. They pulled up a couple of chairs and joined the girls.

"Babs Duffy," Alex said in way of explanation.

Fin nodded. "Nutcase," he commented. He nodded to his partner. "Almost made this one look sane."

"Why does everyone always pick on me?" Munch asked, mock hurt.

"You're just the easiest target," Fin told him. "Now shut up and eat."

Munch sighed and picked up his sandwich, muttering something about karma and comeuppance.

"So, has anyone seen Elliot today?" Melinda asked the two men.

They both shook their heads. "Kathy came in yesterday," Munch commented. "She went to see Elliot, and I didn't hear any sounds of fighting, so I think it went all right."

Casey shook her head. "When is their divorce final?"

"Pretty soon," Munch replied. "I think they've signed the papers and they're working out custody of the kids, so I guess as soon as that's done, it's official."

"I'm surprised they're still so friendly," Alex commented. "Kathy actually came to the hospital to visit Liv?"

"Well, she did save her and Eli's lives," Casey commented. "Liv told me it seems to be a pretty friendly divorce." She paused to take a sip of water, and then continued thoughtfully. "Though I'm not sure how friendly it'll be if Liv and Elliot hook up."

Everyone looked at her, innocently holding a water bottle and looking like she hadn't just said what she did.

"What?" she asked. "It's not like I'm the only one thinking it."

They all had to agree on that.

_I know there are probably some people out there who hate me for having Kathy be so nice, but I'm not a huge Kathy-hater. Only as it pertains to her still being married to Elliot. And having another kid, but Eli's so cute, so it's ok. I wanted her to be friendly, I mean, after all Olivia's done for Kathy and her family, I don't think she'd be a bitch._

_Review please!_


	16. Chapter 16

**At long last! I know it's been a while getting here, but Olivia finally wakes up! Sorry for those of you who think I'm drawing it out too long, but I'm having so much fun exploring all the dusty little corners of SVU. I do realize that it was starting to seem a lot like just filler stuff, I just kept thinking of new ideas. I litterally was going to have Olivia wake up, like, four chapters ago. But then I started writing, and just kept putting it off; I didn't want to rush anything, but I do recognize that it's drawn on a long time, and I'm sorry. But, here you go, as promised, the chapter you've all been waiting for =]**

**Disclaimer: everything belongs to Dick Wolf and NBC.**

Three days. Three days since the surgery, and three days since Elliot had left the hospital. Munch and Fin had suggested it, Cragen had practically demanded it, but still Elliot refused. He needed to be there when Olivia woke up, he wanted to be the first thing she saw.

The doctors were getting worried. They hadn't told Elliot, specifically, but they had mentioned to the captain that the more days that past without Olivia waking up, the more likely it was that she wouldn't. Cragen had told everyone that they were expressly forbidden from telling Elliot. The captain was getting worried, not just for Olivia, but for her partner as well; he barely left the hospital room, and the only time he would eat was if someone brought him food, since he refused to take some time to go to the hospital cafeteria himself. He was practically living on coffee from the machine in the waiting room.

When Cragen checked in on Olivia that evening, he smiled as he saw Elliot slumped down on the bed, head resting on Olivia's thigh, asleep. He was holding her hand. Quietly, the captain left the room, closing the door behind him.

**XXX**

Elliot was dreaming. It was sunset, and he and Olivia were walking along a beach. All alone, they were the only souls in sight; it was one of those picture perfect scenes that usually only happens in movies. Elliot knew it wasn't real, but in that moment, he desperately wanted to believe it. He watched as Olivia walked up to the water, close enough that the waves didn't leave her dry, and closed her eyes. Carefully, he joined her, never taking his eyes off of her angelic face. He watched as she opened her eyes and turned to him, leaning in slightly. Eyes locking, they moved closer and closer, until their lips met in a gentle kiss. Elliot closed his eyes in pleasure. He didn't care if this was a dream, it felt wonderful.

They parted, and Olivia took his hand. Her eyes never left his, and her lips curved into a smile. "This has to be a dream," she commented.

"But it's a good one," he replied, smiling back.

"Wake up, Elliot."

Wake up, Elliot. With her voice ringing in his ears, Elliot slowly began to drift into consciousness. As he became aware of his surroundings, he noticed that the pressure on his hand hadn't ceased. He slowly lifted his head and stared at the hand in question. Carefully, he raised his head even further, moving his gaze up to Olivia's face. Sure enough, she was staring back. He didn't think he had ever seen a more beautiful sight.

"Olivia," he gasped.

She tried to smile, but couldn't quite make it out around the tube sticking down her throat.

"Don't try to talk," he said. "I'll go get a doctor."

Elliot made to stand up and walk towards the door, but Olivia wouldn't let go of his hand. She tightened her grasp, and he looked back at her. Her eyes looked confused, but he also saw concern; he knew the reason behind the emotion, and he almost laughed at it. He knew he must look like hell, and it would just be like Olivia to be concerned about _him_ while she was lying in a hospital bed.

"I'll be right back, Liv," he assured her.

Slowly she nodded, and let go. He walked to the door and opened it. Before he exited, he took one last look at the woman lying before him. He had thought he would never be able to look into those chocolate eyes again. He was so relieved he could cry. A tear or two leaked as he turned around and left to find a doctor.

Olivia settled back and took stock of her surroundings. She was a little nervous, she felt very out of it, but Elliot had promised to be right back, so she tried not to get too worked up. She had already guessed she was in a hospital, based on the white walls, uncomfortable bed, and tacky gown she seemed to be wearing. She didn't remember what had happened. As she shifted in the bed, trying to get more comfortable, she felt a sharp pain shooting through her stomach, and she winced harshly.

"I wouldn't try that." Elliot had returned, in the wake of a young female doctor. "Detective Benson?" the doctor continued. Olivia took her eyes off of Elliot and tried to focus on the doctor. "I'm Doctor Allison Stevens, how are you feeling?"

Olivia just looked at her. Did this woman really expect her to say anything while she had a tube sticking down her throat?

Doctor Stevens laughed. "I'm sure you'd like to get that tube out, right?" Olivia nodded. "OK then." The doctor walked up to the bed and started removing the tube. "This is going to be uncomfortable, as I pull it out, I need you to cough. Your throats going to be pretty sore, but it'll go away soon."

Elliot moved around to the other side, and had grasped Olivia's hand again. As she squeezed, tightly, Doctor Stevens removed the tube. Olivia started coughing, and Elliot handed her a glass of water. She drank shakily, coughing subsiding eventually.

"Feel better?" Doctor Stevens asked.

Olivia nodded again. "A little," she rasped.

Elliot took the cup away when Olivia had finished, and set it back down on the table.

The doctor took out a light and began shining it in Olivia's eyes, explaining as she did, "You've had us all pretty worried, Olivia," she commented. She put the light back in her pocket and looked the detective in the eye. "Do you remember what happened?"

Olivia stared back. She guessed that she had been injured in the line of duty, but she couldn't remember the details. She looked up at Elliot, who seemed to be worried at her lack of response. He squeezed her hand reassuringly, and Olivia racked her brain. What was the last thing she remembered? They had been working a case, the kid, Nicholas, had been kidnapped. It had turned into a custody battle gone deadly. She remembered that the boy had died, they had thought the mother had hired someone to kidnap her son. Sophie had been crazy when they tried to question her, so they took her down to the—

"Shit," Olivia groaned.

"Pardon me?" Doctor Stevens asked politely, as Elliot grinned. This was still Olivia. "Detective Benson," the doctor tried again, "do you remember what-"

"I got shot," Olivia interrupted. She looked at Elliot. "Remind me to kill Huang for suggesting we take Sophie to the morgue when I get out of here."

Elliot laughed outright at that; he wasn't sure what was funnier, what she had said, or the completely serious look on her face as she said it.

Doctor Stevens looked at the partners; she had seen how devoted Elliot was to Olivia, but she had yet to see the interaction between the two, and she was amazed at how close they seemed. They were holding hands, of course, but the way they looked at each other, it was a little scary, and somehow made her feel very lonely.

"How long was I out?" Olivia asked, bringing the doctor's attention back to her patient.

"Three days," Elliot told her gently, knowing that it would unnerve her.

Olivia groaned and rolled her head back towards the ceiling, eyes closing.

"It's natural to be a little upset," Doctor Stevens tried to comfort the woman. "You've lost a chunk of time, it's OK to be confused."

Olivia looked at the doctor. She seemed like a nice person, but did she really have to cookie coat everything? "Thanks, doctor," she said, trying-and failing-to keep the sarcasm out of her voice, a fact she knew Elliot, and she strongly suspected the doctor, had picked up on. "So, when can I go home?"

Elliot had to laugh again at that. That was Olivia, just woke up and already couldn't wait to leave. He knew she hated hospitals.

Doctor Stevens smiled. She was starting to figure out that this wasn't a woman to bullshit. Give her the facts straight and don't try to pad anything. She looked at her watch. "Well, it's five AM right now, so we'll get you an MRI in a few hours, and if all goes well, you should be able to get out of here in a couple of days."

Olivia groaned again. A couple of days? No way in hell was she staying more than one more day.

Elliot knew what she was thinking, and he squeezed her hand. When she looked at him, he shook his head. "You're staying, Liv, don't even think about trying to leave before the doctors give you the OK."

Olivia glared at him. "I hate you sometimes, you know that?"

Elliot could see the playfulness of the glare, and knew she didn't mean it, so he smiled. "I know," he said indulgently.

Olivia just glared harder.

Doctor Stevens decided this would be a good time to bow out. "I'll leave you two alone," she told them. "Take it easy Olivia, and you should get some more sleep. If you need anything, just let me know."

With that, the doctor left, and Elliot and Olivia were alone. They looked at each other for a moment, and even though no words were exchanged, an entire conversation was had. Anyone watching would see the the adoration and passion in their gazes; but to the two of them, it was a look of compassion, friendship, _partnership_. They put love into their stares, but refused to hope that it was returned in the other's eyes. Elliot was telling Olivia how relieved he was that she was awake, how much he had missed her. Olivia was telling him that he was a fool for worrying, didn't she always come back to him?

As the silent conversation ended, Olivia couldn't get over the feeling that she was missing something. Rather, she couldn't remember something. She couldn't think of what it was, though, and for the moment she was ecstatic that Elliot had yet to let go of her hand. She felt her cheeks warm, and her heart speed up; she cursed the hospital as the evidence beeped loudly in the background. Elliot was sure to notice.

Slowly and deliberately, eyes still locked, Elliot raised their intertwined hands to his lips and kissed hers gently. He was taking a risk, he knew it, but maybe now was the time to take some. Being safe certainly never got them anywhere. He didn't know if what everyone had been telling him was right, but there was only one way to find out.

He lowered her hand again, and watched as her blush deepened and her smile widened. Maybe they _were _right. He reached his free hand up to push a lock of hair out of Olivia's face and settled it behind her ear. She had yet to move, either in a good way or in a bad. She still seemed too shocked at what he was doing to respond.

"I should go call Cragen, let him know you're awake," he told her softly, making no attempt to leave.

Olivia nodded, and extracted her hand from his. She slowly reached up to touch his cheek, softly running her hand down until it rested on his shoulder. "You probably should," she agreed.

They stayed like that for a minute longer, before Elliot sighed and stood up, heading towards the door.

"Hey, El?"

He looked back at the woman who had captivated his heart for all these years.

"Thanks."

"For what?" he questioned.

Olivia shrugged. "For being here," she replied. Seeing his confused look, she elaborated, "For the last three days, for not leaving."

Elliot was surprised. "You knew I was here?" _Shit_, he thought. Was that nurse right, could she hear what he was saying? Had she heard his bedside confession?

Olivia smiled. "I knew you were here," she confirmed. "I could tell."

Elliot tried to match her smile, and succeeded, to a degree. "I'll be back soon," he promised, and left.

Olivia was left alone to her thoughts. She couldn't shake the feeling that there was something she was supposed to remember, but before she could put any effort into thinking about the puzzle, she felt the weightlessness of sleep surround her, and she gave into it willingly.

* * *

Elliot walked into the waiting room, pulling his phone out as he did so. Pressing speed dial three, he put the phone to his ear and listened. Cragen picked up on the third ring.

"Hey Cap, it's Elliot…she's awake."

_So, how'd I do? She finally woke up! Did she hear Elliot's confession? What happens next? Review to find out!_


	17. Chapter 17

**Wow, I pretty much knew how this story was going to go up until Olivia wakes up, but now I'm not sure what's going to happen next. So updates will probably be slower now, as I try and figure out where this story is going.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but my own thoughts!**

Cragen set the phone back down on his desk and grinned. He was beyond relieved; the last three days had been torture. He had stopped by the hospital frequently, but still needed to be at the station, he didn't necessarily trust that the Chief of Detectives' charity would stretch so far as to let him stay out of the precinct for days on end; he had received updates from Alex and Casey, who didn't have to worry about putting in an appearance at work; Munch and Fin also spent most of their time at the hospital, not caring about blowing off work.

Cragen stood up and walked towards the door. He stopped before opening it, and looked out the window into the almost empty squad room. This was one of the few times he had seen Munch and Fin at their desks, though looking now, he could tell they weren't doing anything productive. Fin was staring into space, absentmindedly clicking his pen. Munch's eyes were glued to Olivia's empty desk. He looked contemplative. It was five o'clock in the morning, yet he wasn't surprised to see them at the precinct. He knew they probably hadn't been home in days. He felt the same way; he knew that being at the station, and _being _at the station were two completely different beasts. Even though he was here, he couldn't concentrate, and he knew he probably wasn't very useful to the department right now, but he couldn't even _think _about going home. He just needed to be where he felt close to Olivia.

As Cragen watched, Melinda entered the room, and walked up to the detectives. Fin's eyes focused, and he took in the medical examiner. They began to talk, sounds muffled and indistinct by the closed door.

Everything seemed to come through a fog. That was how it had been for the last three days. Nothing and no one had managed to penetrate that vortex that surrounded him, surrounded all of them. They had gone through their days, going through the motions, but not really _thinking_, almost in a zombielike state. Now, after talking to Elliot, Cragen felt the fog begin to melt. He was assaulted by the sounds and the smells, he began to take stock of his own thoughts again.

Smiling, he opened the door and joined his detectives and the medical examiner.

**XXX**

When Melinda entered the squad room, she wasn't sure what she was doing. She didn't expect anyone to be there, but she was drawn to the room, for reasons she couldn't explain. So she was surprised when she walked in to find Munch and Fin, sitting at their desks, staring off into space as if they had forgotten where they were. As she approached, Fin's eyes snapped back to the present and he nodded at her.

"What are you doing here?" he questioned.

Melinda shrugged. "Couldn't sleep, thought I'd get some work done."

Fin nodded. "But why _here_?" he asked again.

Melinda knew what he was saying; why was she in the squad room, why not in the morgue? She avoided Fin's gaze, noticing that Munch had snapped out of his reverie and was listening. "I tried," she almost whispered. "I managed about five minutes in that room, before I had to leave. I just couldn't…" she tried to explain, not knowing if she was succeeding.

But Fin understood. "It's OK, Mel," he assured her. "Pull up a chair," he continued, "It's not like we were doing anything productive."

Melinda nodded and smiled. "What are you doing here, then?" she asked.

Munch joined the conversation. "Avoiding an empty apartment," he replied, forlornly.

Fin agreed. "Couldn't go home, couldn't spend more time at the hospital, plus, you know," he paused and gestured towards Olivia's empty desk, "she's _here_, sort of, if that makes any sense."

Melinda glanced at the desk and then looked back at Fin. "I know," she consoled. She rested against Munch's desk. "I was going to head to the hospital in a few hours, if you guys want to come," she ventured, noticing Cragen exiting his office and joining them. She saw the looks in the detectives' eyes, and knew they had spent so much time there, she wasn't sure if they could handle any more waiting. "It's OK if you don't, I understand," she comforted them.

Munch and Fin looked at each other, but any answer was cut off as Cragen spoke. "I'm heading down there now," he told them. "You should all come with me."

They looked at him, confused.

"What's going on, Cap?" Munch asked.

Cragen looked at the group and smiled. "Elliot just called. Olivia's awake."

A second of shocked silence followed, before Munch and Fin jumped up, barely stopping long enough to grab their coats, and headed towards the door. Melinda looked at the captain, and saw the light returning to his eyes. She returned his smile, and the two of them followed the detectives out the door.

* * *

When they arrived at the hospital, they were met in the waiting room by a very happy Alex and Casey.

"She's asleep," Casey informed the group.

Cragen nodded. "What did the doctor say?" he asked.

Alex shook her head. "You'll have to ask Elliot," she told him. "We just got here."

"Did you see her?" asked Fin.

"We looked in, saw she was asleep. Elliot told us he called you, so we decided to wait out here," Casey replied.

"Can we see her?" Melinda jumped in.

Alex and Casey nodded. "You'll probably get kicked out pretty soon, though," Casey warned. "Elliot said that the doctor wanted to get Liv in for an MRI this morning."

Without saying anything, the small group headed out of the waiting room and towards their fallen comrade. It wasn't that they didn't believe Alex and Casey, they just needed to see the truth for themselves. They needed to see, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that Olivia was all right.

**XXX**

Pushing the door open carefully, Fin peeked inside. Elliot was still occupying that uncomfortable chair; he had pulled it right up next to the bed, so close that there really was no further to go. He had a hold of Olivia's hand, and was grasping it tightly with both of his.

Fin filed in, closely followed by Munch, Cragen, and Melinda. They all let out sighs of relief as they saw Olivia. She looked much better than she had the day before. They had taken the tube out, and her unadorned face was the most beautiful thing they had ever seen.

Elliot heard the noise behind him and turned to look. The new arrivals could see how much more relaxed he was; it was as if a veil had lifted: the lines were gone, she shadows disappeared. He looked like he had shed ten years.

Elliot, taking in the group in front of him, thought the same thing. Everything was so much better now, when it had looked like death warmed over just twenty four hours earlier.

Melinda walked up to him and rested a hand on his shoulder. She looked down and smiled, a real smile. "So how is she?" she asked.

Elliot smiled too, though he refused to let go of Olivia's hand to grasp hers. "She's fine," he said.

Cragen, Fin, and Munch stepped closer to surround the bed.

Cragen rested a hand on her arm. He couldn't stop smiling, ever since he had gotten the phone call from Elliot. "Alex and Casey said the doctor wanted to do an MRI?" he confirmed. "Are they worried?"

Elliot shook his head. "Doctor Stevens said it's more just a precaution," he assuaged any fears. "Liv's good, she doesn't have any memory loss, and she seems like her old self." His smile got bigger. "She even asked me to remind her to kill Huang when she got out of the hospital."

They all laughed.

"I'm sure Huang wants to kill Huang," Munch stated. They all knew that the FBI psychologist was feeling pretty guilty. He had stopped by the hospital once, but hadn't had the nerve to actually enter Olivia's room. Munch and Fin, returning from a food run, had seen him leaving.

"When will she be able to leave?" Cragen asked.

Elliot looked down at Olivia and sighed. "The doctor says not for a few more days, but Liv's all ready to go. I'm guessing she'll be begging me to spring her by tomorrow."

"I know you're talking about me."

Everyone looked down at the woman on the bed. Her eyes were still closed, but there was a small smirk on her face. Elliot tried to let go of her hand, not sure if she'd want that much contact, but she squeezed him tighter, silently telling him not to even think about it.

Olivia opened her eyes and smiled a real smile. It was returned on all sides by the people who had formed a half circle around her bed. "Hey," she said.

"How're you feeling?" Fin asked.

Olivia looked at him with a classic Olivia stare, smile disappearing briefly in a grimace. "Like I got shot," she retorted.

"Stupid question," Munch chastised his partner.

"Sorry," Fin mumbled. Olivia reached out with her free hand. He gratefully took it as her smile returned. "I'm really glad you're OK," he smiled back. "I'd hate to have to deal with Elliot without you."

Munch slapped his partner's shoulder and laughed. "I think your idea of 'dealing with' would be considered a crime, buddy," he chortled.

Fin looked contemplative, then smiled. "Nah," he shot back. "Justifiable homicide."

Everyone laughed at that, though they were quick to stop in concern when Olivia groaned and grabbed her stomach.

Elliot reached one hand up as if to cup her face, then lowered it lamely. "Are you all right?" he asked worriedly.

Olivia smiled and released her hand from his grip so that she could raise it up to place it reassuringly on his shoulder. She met his eyes warmly. "I'm fine," she promised him.

The rest of the group looked on, calculating. They were sure that something had changed between the partners, some dynamic had shifted, but they weren't sure what. They seemed _closer_, if that was possible. At this moment they were all wondering just what had transpired between the two before their arrival. Only time would tell.

All thought was interrupted as Doctor Stevens walked back in. she smiled at the amount of guests in her patient's room. She recognized all of them, since they had practically been living at the hospital for the last three days.

"Good morning," she greeted, and got mumbled "morning"'s back. "I think this is too many visitors, didn't I say something about two at a time?" She smiled, so they would know that she was joking. They smiled back. "Well, I hate to interrupt this party, but I need to take Olivia up for some tests." She paused, and looked around the room. She could tell that they were loathe to leave. And she didn't blame them; they had spent the last three days not knowing when or if they would see their friend again. And now that she could see them interacting with Olivia, awake, she could see that her earlier assumptions had been right: they were a close group, and more than just work partners; she could tell that these people were best friends, family. They all looked much more relaxed now than they had the last time she had seen them. "I'll wait outside for a couple of minutes," she said. "And don't worry, you'll see her again in a couple of hours."

With that, the doctor left, and everyone turned back to Olivia.

Cragen smoothed her bangs back and smiled. "See you soon," he promised, and left.

Munch took her hand, which was still resting on her abdomen. He squeezed it reassuringly, smiling, and then followed the captain out.

Fin mimicked Munch's actions, though he stopped at the door and turned around. "I'm really glad you're OK," he repeated, before leaving.

Melinda walked up to the bedside and bent down to give Olivia an awkward hug. The detective reached up to circle Melinda's back clumsily. "See you soon," she repeated Cragen's words.

Olivia nodded as the ME let go and left the room. It was now just she and Elliot again. He was stroking the back of her hand absentmindedly as he stared into her deep chocolate eyes. He couldn't get past the light in them; they didn't just shine, they _sparkled_ as she smiled at him.

Slowly, making sure that there was time for her to tell him 'no' if she wanted, he reached his hand up again and ran it lightly through her hair and down her cheek.

Olivia closed her eyes in pleasure. She couldn't believe this was happening. It had to be a dream. Or maybe this was heaven. But even as she thought that, she knew it was really true. Elliot was here, holding her hand and touching her cheek. She opened her eyes again and smiled at the man in front of her.

Looking now at an awake Olivia, Elliot was finally convinced that everyone was right, and that he was an idiot. She looked amazed that he was being so forward, happy that he was, and underneath it all, desperate for more. Levering himself off of the uncomfortable chair, he hovered over her now, leaning down slowly, giving her time just in case his Olivia-radar was completely off.

Olivia watched as his face got closer; all she could concentrate on was his lips, leaning down slowly. She didn't move as he gently brushed one cheek, then the other, with a chaste kiss. Pulling back slightly, he smiled, his classic Elliot smile that never failed to melt her insides. _Wars could be won with that smile_ she thought giddily.

He leaned down one more time to kiss her forehead, as the doctor walked back in and interrupted the moment.

Elliot pulled back again, and let go of her hand. "I'll be waiting when you get back," he promised.

And she knew he would be. She didn't know what was happening between the two of them, though that nagging sense was back. It was like a dream, something she should remember, but couldn't. Elliot left and Doctor Stevens prepared to move her upstairs, she racked her brain, trying to think. The memory wouldn't come, and Olivia could only hope that some quiet time would help her to think. She put the thought away to bring back up later, and turned to process what had just happened. She had been in love with her partner for years, but he had been married, he had five kids, and she just didn't think he saw her the same way. _Maybe it's time to rethink some things_, she thought wryly. If what had just transpired was any indication, Elliot may have been harboring some more-than-just-friendly feelings as well.

_I know it's been a few days, but like I said, I had only thought this through up to a certain point. I don't really know where to go from here, so any suggestions?_

_And does anyone want to see any other pairings? I was thinking maybe Fin/Melinda, but I'm not sure. And NO, I'm not going Munch/Casey, he's way too old, and she's way to young!_

_Review please!_


	18. Chapter 18

**OK, first of all, you guys are awesome, thanks so much for the great reviews! Second of all…wait, I don't have a second of all! On with the story **

**Wait, I just thought of one! I was going back and reviewing what I had written so far, and I just saw that about 12 chapters ago, I said I was almost done, haha! I'm not even going to **_**try**_** and predict when I'll be finished. This story has really taken on a life of its own, and I really don't know where it's going to go.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing you recognize!**

When Jo walked into the squad room at noon, she was surprised, but not necessarily shocked to find it absent of any recognizable faces. Noticing someone come out of Cragen's office, she approached him, sure that he would know where the captain was. Drawing closer, she recognized Detective Hartley, one of the officers sent by the Chief of D's to help pick up the slack.

"Where's Cragen?" she asked the detective bluntly.

Hartley looked up from the file he was holding, and recognized the ADA. "Hospital," he told her, just as brusquely. "Detective Benson woke up this morning."

Jo was left in a state of shock as the detective walked away. Why hadn't anyone called her? Here was more tangible proof that she just wasn't a part of their group. She was a coworker, a colleague, but she wasn't a friend. And she didn't think that would ever change.

With a sigh, Jo turned around and left the squad room, headed towards the hospital.

* * *

"So, I don't suppose you take bribes," Olivia queried innocently as Doctor Stevens wheeled her bed towards the elevator.

As the doors opened and the doctor pushed her in, pushing the button to the sixth floor and waiting for the doors to close, she looked questioningly at her patient. She cocked one eyebrow and gave the woman laying in front of her a half smile.

"I'm not sure I catch your drift, Detective," she returned, formally.

Olivia smiled back. "What would it take for you to let me leave, by, say, tomorrow?"

Doctor Stevens shook her head. "Naughty, naughty Detective," she chastised, playing along with Olivia's teasing attitude. "Isn't bribery a crime?"

Olivia shook her head. "Desperate times call for desperate measures," she retorted, still smiling. "Come on, doc, I'm begging you. I hate hospitals."

The doors opened and the doctor wheeled Olivia out and headed down the hall. "I promise, we'll get you out of here as soon as we can, but you of all people should know how important it is that we make sure you're ready to leave; you don't want to have to come back, do you?"

Olivia shuddered and shook her head. "I guess not," she admitted.

"Good," Doctor Stevens smiled. "Then let's get these tests done, so that you don't have to spend a second longer than necessary in this hospital."

* * *

When Jo entered the waiting room, she noticed the lighter air. Everyone was much happier, laughing and joking as they waited. No one acknowledged her presence until she joined the group, smiling hesitantly.

Cragen looked at her and nodded, as the talking died down and everyone turned their attention to the newest member.

Jo swallowed and forced a smile onto her face. "I stopped by the station," she told them, 100% feeling like she didn't belong. "They said she was awake. How is she?"

Elliot chuckled, breaking the mounting tension. "Already asking to leave," he informed her.

Jo forced herself to laugh along. From what she had seen, this was just par for the course for the detective. Olivia wasn't the kind of person to enjoy lying in a hospital bed for days on end, any more than she did being told what to do; undoubtedly the doctors were getting an earful from the spirited woman.

The room lapsed into an awkward silence again. Jo drifted over to sit down, followed by the rest of the group. Fin and Melinda decided to make a trip to the cafeteria, and, after taking orders from the others, they left.

Elliot looked at his former partner. They hadn't spoken since before the shooting; he thought she may be avoiding him, considering the few times she had visited the hospital, she hadn't once actually come to Olivia's room. And right now she was pointedly looking anywhere but at him, making sure to avoid eye contact at all costs. He had a pretty good idea of why she was acting this way. He did know her, he ought to after all those years of being partners; and as rocky as the last couple of months had been, he needed to quell her fears. He knew the way they had all been acting towards her was less than friendly, and certainly could be taken as implied blame, but it really wasn't; they were a tight group, and outsiders just didn't fit in easily.

"Jo," he implored quietly. She still didn't meet his eyes. "Jo," he said again.

Finally she looked up, slightly afraid. She was sure that they were going to have 'the conversation', something she had been trying to avoid for days now. And here it was going to happen in front of everyone. She really didn't want to be here.

"I'm going to head out," she tried to deflect, standing up and heading towards the door.

Elliot watched her leave, then stood up quickly and followed her. He knew why she was running, and he couldn't blame her. It would be much easier to talk alone.

**XXX**

Elliot caught up with Jo as she waited for the elevator.

"Jo, wait," he called out. She consented to stand there for a few moments as he hurried down the hall. Once he was closer he began again, using a more appropriate indoor voice. "Jo, I just wanted to tell you that none of this is your fault."

Jo stalled. This was not what she had been expecting. Elliot saw her confusion and smiled wryly.

"I mean it, Jo. If it seemed like any of us were blaming you," he paused and looked at her for a moment before continuing. "If it seemed like _I_ blamed you, I'm sorry." He beseeched earnestly. "I didn't mean it to come out that way."

Jo smiled, a real smile this time. "It's OK Elliot," she assured him.

He just looked at her. "I know you've been avoiding me," he told her.

She nodded, looking slightly ashamed. "I guess I was a little afraid of your reaction," she admitted.

"I'm sorry," he said again. "I was a little distracted-"

"I know," she interrupted. "I still feel like I need to apologize though," she said.

Elliot was confused. "For what?" he asked.

Jo looked away. "I feel like I owe Olivia an apology," she said to the empty hall around them.

Elliot just looked more puzzled. "She doesn't blame you either," he tried to assuage her fears.

Jo nodded, but didn't look convinced. She turned around as the elevator doors opened. "Tell Olivia and the others I'll see them soon," she mumbled as she stepped in.

Elliot watched as the doors closed behind her. He hoped she would realize that no one was mad at her, for all her eagerness to do anything necessary to get that confession out of Sophie, _for putting his partner in harm's way_. Elliot started. Where had that thought come from? He didn't blame Jo, did he? He had spent the last few days sure that he was at fault, that he could have done something to keep his partner safe. And the guilt was killing him. But then…Jo had been pushing for a confession; Olivia had wanted to hold off for a little while, the woman had, after all, just lost her son, Olivia had been worried about her stability, but Jo had practically ordered her to get a move on. As Elliot headed back to the waiting room he had to wonder if maybe he _did _blame Jo just a little bit.

* * *

"So how are things going with you?" Fin asked as he and Melinda stood in line waiting to pay for their food.

Melinda looked up at the detective and smiled. "You mean, other than the fact that I was held hostage in my own morgue and saw one of my best friends get shot right in front of me?"

Fin laughed. "OK, stupid question."

Melinda chuckled as well. "Mark moved out," she admitted, "six months ago. He wants a divorce."

Fin's smile disappeared. Melinda hadn't talked about her family that much, but what she did share was mostly about her daughter. She hadn't mentioned any sort of spousal problems. "I'm sorry, Mel," he said quietly.

Melinda shook her head. "Don't be," she argued. "We've been having problems for a while now. He always thought I spent too much time at work and not enough with my family."

Fin smiled. "Gee, that sounds familiar," he joked.

Melinda had to smirk. "I know," she groaned. "I'm Elliot, only I don't broadcast my marital problems to the world."

Fin nodded. "Well, if you need anything, I'm here," he told her.

Melinda rested a hand on his arm. "Thank you, Fin," she told him, genuinely happy that he was the first one she had shared with.

Fin started at Melinda's touch. Had she felt the jolt of electricity between the two of them as her hand caressed his arm? He looked into her eyes and felt something stir that he had not experienced since the early years of his marriage, before the arguments had begun.

Melinda felt it too, a pool of heat that settled somewhere in her stomach and flushed her cheeks as she met Fin's gaze unflinchingly.

Their eyes remained locked for a minute, until a customer behind them broke the trance by rudely asking them if they were going to pay or if he could go around them.

Looking embarrassed, the two moved forward to pay the cashier, before heading back up to the waiting room, in silence. Both had a lot to think about.

Fin had harbored some feelings for the ME for the last couple of years, fully aware that she was married, and, he believed, happy. But that hadn't stopped him from his nighttime imaginings.

Melinda was in a trancelike state. When had she started to stop seeing the man next to her as a friend, and started thinking of him as something more? When had his nearness started to form knots in her stomach? When had his touch started to end all coherent thought?

Melinda sighed as Fin held the waiting room door open for her. She had a feeling that life was going to get much harder from here on.

_Sorry it took so long! It's been a really busy week-moving into a new apartment, plus I totaled my car, which really upset my dad. So yeah, I've definitely had better weeks =[_

_But anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. People seem to want the F/M relationship, so I'm working it in. There will be a longer conversation between the two of them soon, I promise._

_So, please review!_


	19. Chapter 19

**Wow, so I seem to be getting threats of violence now, haha, I guess it's time for an update =] **

**And thanks for the condolences about my car; sometimes I just hate people, especially stupid people who apparently don't know how to look. Some nice person stopped to let me turn in front of them, but of course someone else thought it would be fun to approach a red light going **_**way**_** too fast.**

**I'm trying to move this story along a bit, so this chapter takes place a few days after the last one-let's just say it's the next week, Olivia will be getting out of the hospital soon.**

**Disclaimer: not mine =[**

"Olivia?"

Olivia could hear someone talking to her, as she hovered between waking and sleeping. With a groan, she decided that she should probably open her eyes; in doing so, she noticed Maureen occupying the chair next to her bed.

"Maureen?" she raised a hand to rub the sleep from her eyes.

Maureen nodded and smiled shyly. "Is it OK that I'm here?" she asked, worried suddenly that maybe her presence might not be the best thing.

Olivia reached over to grasp the girl's hand reassuringly. "Of course it is, honey," she said. "If you don't mind my asking, though, what _are_ you doing here?"

Maureen shrugged and looked down. "Dad had said that you were awake, and I wanted to see if you were all right." She looked back up at Olivia and asked, "Where is dad?"

Olivia chuckled. "I sent him home," she told her partner's daughter. "He was in desperate need of a change of clothes..." She paused and looked contemplative. "And a shower," she tacked on as an afterthought. "I made him go home, take some time to himself; same with everyone else. I made them promise not to come back until tomorrow; all the hovering was getting to me."

Maureen smiled. She had known Olivia for years, and she knew the woman well enough to know that she hated being waited upon. It made sense that the detective would feel awkward with so many people just standing around watching her.

"If you want me to leave-" she started nervously, but Olivia cut her off.

"Of course not, Mo," she hurried to assuage the younger woman's fears. "I'm glad you're here." She squeezed Maureen's hand. "How are your brother and sisters?" she asked.

Maureen smiled again. "They're good," she said. "We were all really worried. I totally freaked out when I saw the special news bulletin, and then there's this report about an injured SVU detective. I was at the gym on a treadmill; when they showed you coming out of that building, I almost required a trip to the hospital myself."

Olivia grimaced, imagining the horror of Maureen stopping on a moving treadmill and going flying backwards into a wall.

Maureen continued. "We all came to visit last week." She stopped and considered what to say next. Her dad had said there was nothing between them, he was positive that her feelings were platonic, but Maureen wanted to test the waters. She had her own suspicions, and she wanted to see if she was right. "Mom came too," she added cautiously, watching for a reaction.

Olivia was surprised. She and Kathy had been friends once upon a time, and yes, she had saved the woman's life, as well as her son's, but things had been slightly more strained since the impending divorce. Olivia got the feeling Kathy blamed her for their marital problems, and, at the time, she had no idea why, she couldn't imagine why she would be at fault, but now Olivia had that encounter with Elliot to think about; maybe Kathy was right, maybe she was to blame for the divorce. The thought made Olivia feel guilty; she had never wanted to be that person who came between someone else's marriage.

"That's nice," she managed to get out, knowing that Maureen was waiting for an answer. "How is your mom?" she added, knowing that it was the right thing to say.

Maureen looked at Olivia. She knew they were venturing into awkward territory. She knew that her mother had suspicions about the relationship between her husband and his partner, and she wasn't a child anymore; she knew the major reason for her parent's divorce was lying right in front of her. She remembered the friendship that her mom had had with Olivia years ago, before things had gotten strained at home. And she knew that that friendship had changed drastically after her dad had moved out.

"She's OK," Maureen said. She considered her options now, and decided to just go for broke. "You know, she's all right with you and dad…" she trailed off, hoping the woman would catch her drift, but Olivia just looked confused.

"With me and your dad what?" she asked. She had a pretty good idea of what the girl was talking about, but she didn't want to give away anything for free.

Maureen just looked exasperated. "Come on, Liv," she said, with a mock-glare. "I know you love my dad." Seeing Olivia open her mouth to speak, she rushed on. "And he loves you, so stop dancing around it and just go for it!"

Olivia was shocked. She didn't know how to answer that statement, but before she could even try, Maureen continued.

"I overheard them talking when mom came to visit. She told him that she knew they had fallen out of love a long time ago, and that he should be happy. She knows that he loves you, and she wants you to be happy too."

Olivia was still stunned. Kathy was giving them her blessing? She still wasn't convinced that Elliot harbored any real feelings for her, despite them moment they had shared earlier. But it was nice that Kathy would be OK if something were to happen.

"Thanks for telling me, Maureen," she said quietly, doubt still in her eyes.

Maureen saw it, and shook her head. What would it take for these two people to just admit to each other what they felt? They were honestly the stupidest people alive; the attraction between them was _so_ obvious!

Sighing internally, she stood up. "Well, just wanted to tell you," she said. "I've got a class, so I have to leave?" She said it more as a question, asking if it was OK.

"Of course," Olivia assured her. "You go on, have fun, tell your siblings I said hi…"she trailed off before continuing, "and your mother," she added.

Maureen nodded and headed towards the door. "I hope you get out of here soon," she threw over her shoulder.

Olivia laughed. "Me too," she chuckled.

* * *

"Thanks for inviting me to dinner," Melinda said shyly, looking up from her menu.

Fin met her eyes and smiled. "No problem," he replied.

Melinda smiled back, trying to quench the nerves. She was a little confused and trying to hide it; Fin had asked her to dinner, but she didn't know if this was supposed to be a date or just two friends eating together. She didn't want to just come out and ask the question though.

Fin could sense the awkwardness. He didn't really know his reasons behind the invitation; he wanted it to be something more, but he didn't know if she was ready. After all, she was married. _Divorced_, he reminded himself. Her husband had moved out. But that didn't mean she wanted him, as more than just a friend.

He cleared his throat. "So, how's your daughter?" he asked lamely, trying to fill the silence.

Melinda looked down, eyes clouded.

"I'm sorry," Fin rushed. Maybe he shouldn't have brought up family.

Melinda looked up again and smiled, eyes moist. "No, no, it's OK," she assured him. "Tamara's holding up. The whole ordeal has been pretty hard on her, but she's a teenager. You know how resilient they are."

Fin nodded. He did know. "How's she doing in school?" he asked. He was genuinely curious, and enjoying the casual banter. They weren't really discussing anything deep and vital, but to him, it was important. It mattered.

Melinda's smile widened. "She's doing really great," she said, motherly pride shining through. "Straight A's, finishing up the school year top of her class, again; could be a future valedictorian."

"That's really great," Fin complimented. "Tell her congratulations for me."

Melinda looked down for a moment, feeling awkward again, but only slightly. "I will, thanks." She looked back up and turned around with the same general question. "How's Ken?"

It was Fin's turn to look down. "He's fine," he said, no real emotion in his voice.

"Still awkward between you two?" Melinda asked sympathetically.

Fin shrugged. "I guess." He let out a big sigh. "I don't know," he confessed. "I try, but it doesn't seem like he's trying. He's my son, and I just want him to be happy. I don't know if Ken gets that."

"Have you ever told him?"

Fin shrugged again. "I don't know," he admitted.

"You should tell him," Melinda encouraged.

Fin nodded. "I know," he whispered. Tears were close to the surface now, and he needed to redirect the conversation before they spilled out.

Melinda saw his discomfort and slowly reached across the table to grasp Fin's hand lightly. She didn't know what she was doing, but she was just going on impulse now. She wanted to hold his hand. A random quote from some movie that she and Tamara had watched during a girl's night in movie and makeup extravaganza floated through her mind. _Never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game_. The movie itself was definitely a teenage chick flick, but Melinda remembered that quote. It was good advice, and she refused to allow herself to think of the potential consequences. She refused to admit that maybe she was being incredibly stupid, and that she was reading everything all wrong.

Fin watched as her hand moved, seeing it all in slow motion, and he held his breath. As he looked, her hand made contact with his, and she squeezed lightly. He squeezed back. Their eyes met and a spark jumped between them. He smiled tentatively, and she smiled back.

"How'd you like to go out?" he asked quietly. "On a real date," he clarified.

Melinda grinned. "I'd love to," she told him.

* * *

"Elliot, I'm fine," Olivia laughed as Elliot rushed around the car to open her door and help her out of the seat.

"I know," Elliot replied, still insisting on helping her as she walked carefully and painfully up the steps and into her apartment building.

"Really, El," Olivia was getting slightly annoyed now. She wasn't breakable just because she had gotten shot. She was so psyched to finally be going home, but she didn't require a babysitter.

Elliot ignored her to open the door to her apartment. He closed it behind her as the two of them took in the messy, dusty room that hadn't seen inhabitants in almost two weeks.

Olivia looked around and sighed, thinking that she would have to do some serious house cleaning to get her apartment back to living standards; maybe she could cheat some corners though considering she hardly ever spent time in the small one bedroom hole.

Elliot saw the look and shook his head. "Don't even think about it, Liv," he warned. "I'll do the clean up, you go lie down."

Olivia glared at her partner. They were studiously ignoring bringing up the moment that they had shared in that hospital, trying-and failing-to pretend that nothing had changed. Seeing the determination in his eyes, she sighed.

"Fine," she said, defeated. With Elliot's mistrusting eyes on her way-to-easy-to-convince retreating figure, she headed down the hall to her bedroom.

Closing the door behind her, she considered her options. She was wearing the clothes Elliot had brought her in the hospital: sweatpants-thankfully, because she didn't think she could handle a button or a zipper-and a t-shirt. She decided she could leave the pants on, but she wanted to change into a more comfortable shirt. Opening the dresser, she pulled out an old NYPD shirt, and contemplated her next move. Painfully, she tried to remove the shirt she was wearing. She got it about halfway off before the pain stopped her. Taking a deep breath, she tried again, feeling her stomach screaming in protest.

Finally giving up, she lay down in her bed, wearing the same shirt she had come home in, and was immediately asleep.

_Sorry this chapter took so long to put up; I don't have any witty or good excuses, I was just distracted, and didn't have any inspiration. But it's up now, I hope you like it. _

_Coming up next: what's going to happen between Elliot and Olivia? Will they discuss their feelings? Did Olivia hear Elliot's bedside confession? Will she remember it? The confrontation IS coming! =]_

_Review please!_


	20. Chapter 20

**So, Olivia's home, what'll happen between her and Elliot? How's the rest of the squad doing? Read to find out!**

**Disclaimer: they're not mine, I'm just playing with them for a while.**

Olivia was dreaming. It wasn't really a dream, more like snippets of a memory, something coming back to her, forgotten once but not anymore.

_I need you to wake up._ He had said. _I need you._ She couldn't remember when she had heard this, but she recognized the voice, clear as day. _You were always there_. _I always took that for granted._

With a start, Olivia woke up. His voice resonated in her ears. _I need you. I love you._ She gasped quietly, eyes wide open in shock as she stared at the ceiling. He had been there, sitting next to her while she lay comatose, and she had heard him. She remembered it now. He had told her he loved her. The three words she had always longed to hear him say, the three words she had never expected him to confess.

But he had. In that dark hospital room, waiting vigilantly for her to open her eyes, he had opened up. He had broken down a barrier that had been raised years ago and had stood strong ever since. But it was rubble now. The line had been set eleven years previous when she had first joined the unit, a line built on male-female partner dynamics, a decade-plus long marriage, kids, and a deep rooted friendship. But lines were made to be crossed, and in that hospital room, on that night, Elliot had crossed it. And there was no going back.

Olivia took a deep breath as the weight of this newfound information settled upon her. The ball was in her court, and it was her move to make. With a sigh she sat up, gasping again, louder this time, and in pain rather than surprise. She couldn't stop the moan or the tears of pain as her abdomen protested, quite adamantly, to her moving.

**XXX**

Elliot had watched, concerned, as Olivia had given in without a fight and disappeared into her room to sleep. He had busied himself by quietly returning the apartment to its livable state.

When he had finished, he looked at the clock. Five a.m. Perusing through the fridge and the cabinets, and noticing their sad lack of, well, anything, he decided to make a trip to the 24-hour corner market down the street.

The sky was just turning pink and the first rays of the morning were beginning to light up the living room through the newly cleaned windows when Elliot returned, weighed down by bags. He moved quietly into the kitchen to put away the groceries, the makings of the first decent meal Olivia would have had in two weeks. Once all of the food was stored, he kept himself busy, giving his partner's stove a workout that he strongly suspected it had not seen since Olivia had moved in.

As he mixed the pancake batter, he heard a noise coming from Olivia's bedroom. Recognizing the pain in the sound, he quickly set down the bowl and rushed to be by his partner's side.

**XXX**

Elliot knocked on the door quietly; he didn't want to just barge into her bedroom uninvited.

He got no response, but he heard the moan and all coherent thought left him. His partner was in pain, and he needed to be near her.

He opened the door slowly. "Liv?" he called quietly, stepping inside and walking up to her bed. He could see her half sitting, half lying down, one hand folded across her stomach, as if trying to shield it.

He knelt next to her, tentatively reaching out to grasp the hand across her stomach, squeezing gently. "What's wrong?" he asked.

Olivia groaned again, clenching her teeth. "I'm fine," she tried to deflect, but Elliot wasn't having any of it.

"Damn it, Liv," he growled, "Stop trying to be so strong." He was frustrated. Why did this woman have to be so infuriating? She had been shot, just got home from the hospital, and was trying to pretend like everything was perfectly fine. He knew it all stemmed from a childhood of taking care of herself, having to look after her mother. Years of not having anyone to turn to, of having to be the only person in her life that she could trust, had made her believe that she just _had_ to be that tough, that she couldn't just admit that sometimes, life was too much. It was one of the things he loved the most about her.

Olivia glared at him. Why did this man have to know her so damn well? "I was trying to sit up, OK?" she said, exasperated. "Clearly, it's not working." She gave up the pretense and collapsed back down on the bed with a sigh.

Elliot had to smile. She would never ask for help, so he would just have to offer. "Let me give you a hand," he said carefully. He didn't want to lose a body part for the suggestion.

Olivia looked at him. She wasn't used to admitting that she needed assistance, but seeing as how she had just been seriously injured, maybe she didn't need to do everything herself for a while.

Giving her partner a small smile, she offered him her hand. "Thanks," she smiled shyly.

Elliot returned her smile and helped her lever herself off of the bed. When she was finally in a sitting position and he was resting on his knees in front of her, he let go of her hand. Olivia refused to meet his gaze, so he gently raised her chin up to force her to look into his eyes. He needed to say something, and he needed to make sure that she heard him.

"Liv, I know you think you need to be strong," he pleaded. Olivia slid her gaze over to focus on the wall over her partner's left shoulder. "It's how you grew up, I get that. You need people to believe that you're OK. But Olivia-" he waited until she met his eyes again, "There's nothing wrong with admitting that you're not."

With that, Elliot stood up and left the bedroom, calling over his shoulder, "Breakfast should be ready in five minutes."

Olivia watched him leave. She had a lot to think about, first and foremost was the bedside confession she was sure he didn't think she had heard. But now she was also considering his parting lines. She knew that she didn't need to be the 'tough cop' all of the time, but it was so ingrained into her personality by now, she honestly didn't know how to stop.

_Baby steps_, she thought. Maybe it didn't mean breaking down and showing weakness to the world; maybe it just meant letting someone in, just a little bit. Maybe it meant finally telling her partner how she felt. Finally admitting that she needed someone, that she couldn't do this alone, all of the time. That was the hardest part; she had been alone her entire life, and she was comfortable that way. She was used to it. Admitting now that she wanted to trust someone else would be hard. But if she could let anyone in, it would be Elliot. She already trusted him with her life: he was her partner, he was always there for her. But that was the job. That was trusting him with her safety. This was trusting him with her heart. _But_, she decided, _if anyone is up to the job, it's Elliot_.

With that decision made, she attempted to stand up, wincing horribly as she felt the stabbing pressure intensify. Painfully and limping slightly, she decided to forgo the changing of attire, and headed out to the kitchen for breakfast.

* * *

Cragen looked up when he heard the knock on his door. "Jo!" he was surprised to see the ADA here, in the precinct. They didn't have any cases that he was aware of. "What are you doing here so early?" he asked.

Jo shrugged and walked into the captain's office, closing the door behind her. Taking a seat across from Cragen, she clasped her hands in front of her and wondered where to begin.

Cragen watched her deliberate and waited for the ADA to speak. He knew she had something on her mind; he hadn't seen much of the woman since the shooting, and he knew she was distancing from the rest of the squad.

Jo took a deep breath and looked up at the captain. "I'm not sure I can come back," she admitted. "Jack gave me some time off, but I just don't know if I can still work SVU."

Cragen leaned forward. He could see the look in Jo's eyes, and he wasn't sure of her reasons behind this revelation, but he knew he needed to help the woman. "Why not?" he asked, trying to get to the bottom of her deliberation.

Jo sighed. "I think this whole thing just made me realize the dangers involved."

Cragen raised an eyebrow. He wasn't buying that for a second. "Now why don't I believe that?" he stated.

Jo met the captain's eyes and gave a hard smile. "Can't put anything past you, can I?" The smile disappeared. "I don't think I can work with Benson and Stabler anymore."

Cragen was surprised. He had thought the woman was getting on pretty well with the dynamic duo. "I thought you were doing pretty well, what's changed?"

Jo looked down. "This whole thing," she whispered. "I just feel like it was my fault, and-" she paused, not really sure how to say what she was feeling. Finding the words, she continued, "Benson almost died. She could have died, and Elliot would never have forgiven me."

"Jo," Cragen interrupted, trying to bring the ADA back to him. "It wasn't your fault, and you know that. So does Elliot, and so does Olivia. You don't have to apologize for anything-"

"Do I?"

Cragen looked up to the intruder and Jo turned around to see who had entered the captain's office without knocking. George Huang looked uncharacteristically nervous and upset.

"George!" Cragen gestured to the empty seat. "Come on in."

Huang closed the door and took the vacant chair. "I heard Olivia was out of the hospital," he ventured quietly. No matter what everyone was saying, he would be blaming himself until the end of time. It had been his suggestion to bring Sophie down to the morgue.

Cragen nodded. "Elliot took her home yesterday."

Huang looked up. "How is she?"

Cragen's expression softened. He could feel the guilt emanating from the FBI psychologist. "She will be fine," he assured both the man and the woman in front of him. "She's looking at a long road back, but this is Olivia. You both know she'll be back here a week before she's supposed to be."

They all smiled at that, though it was slightly forced. Cragen sighed. Victims he could deal with, perps he could deal with, but two colleagues wracked with guilt? He didn't know what to say that would finally convince them that they weren't at fault for anything.

"I don't know what I can do to convince you two that you're not to blame, but what do we tell relatives or friends of perps?" They just looked at him. He knew it wasn't exactly the same scenario, but it would fit. "You know we've had people who are convinced that they are at fault because they said something that caused someone to do something stupid; do we blame them? You can both what-if yourself to death, blame yourself until hell freezes over, or you can realize that what Sophie did is _what Sophie did_. It is _not_ your fault. It's Sophie's, and it's Paul's. Blame them, and be thankful that Olivia is OK."

Another knock sounded at his door. Cragen stood up and walked around his desk. With an 'I'll see you both later', he opened the door to reveal Fin. The captain and the detective walked back to the latter's desk, where Munch waited with a case file.

_So, what'd you think? Should I get rid of Jo? I'm not sure, and I think I could go either way right now._

_Review for the next chapter!_


	21. Chapter 21

**I am totally loving all these great reviews! Thanks for the wonderful comments guys! I'm glad you're all enjoying the story =]**

**Hopefully this is the chapter you've all been waiting for!**

**I'm sorry this chapter took so much longer to put out, I've been busy, starting my summer TA job, starting my internship, I just haven't had the time to write. But it's the weekend now, and in between working my way through all the seasons of law and order SVU and one tree hill—**_**again**_**, I wrote this, so enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: maybe one day…**

Olivia limped into the kitchen to find Elliot cooking pancakes on her stove.

"Smells good," she commented, slowly lowering herself onto the bar stool and watching her partner work. He looked good from behind. Olivia smirked; when did she consciously start admiring her partner's ass? She had always enjoyed his good looks, but it was usually just a subconscious musing in the back of her mind.

Elliot turned around and smiled. He noticed the way her eyes quickly flickered up to meet his eyes, and internally he grinned; she was totally checking out his ass. That was a good sign, right?

Turning back to the kitchen, he pulled out two plates and silverware, setting the dishes in front of Olivia. Filling a glass with orange juice, he placed that, too, in front of his partner.

Smiling her thanks, she lifted the glass to her mouth and took a sip.

Elliot busied himself with the pancakes, soon walking around the counter to place a full plate in front of them as he took a seat on the stool next to Olivia.

She watched as he kept piling pancakes onto her plate; laughing, she put a hand on his arm to stop him. "Elliot!" she chuckled, "what are you doing?"

Elliot looked at her and put the plate down. "Trying to fatten you up, Liv," he grinned back. "I don't know if you've noticed, but you lost weight in that hospital. You need some more meat on those bones."

Olivia had to laugh again. "Do you realize how corny you sound El?" She stopped laughing, trying to keep the wince of pain off of her face as she felt the stabbing feeling in her stomach again. "It sounds like you're going to roast me over a fire later!" She gave him a playful shove. Elliot's face fell a bit at that motion-he could feel how weak his partner was, and he was worried.

Forcing a smile back on his face, he defended his actions. "Come on, Liv, we both know that you're going to need to build up your strength again before you can come back to work." He pushed her plate towards her and handed her a fork. "That means eating, now."

Giving away to the stern commanding voice, _which she would do anything not to recognize just how incredibly turned on that voice made her_, she obediently took the fork and started eating, wincing as she chewed; it felt strange to be eating real food-good food-for the first time in what felt like forever.

Elliot watched her eat, trying not to give into his feelings and jump her, right there. She moaned softly. "Are you OK?" he asked worriedly.

Olivia looked at him and smiled. "Fine, El," she assured him. "It's good, thanks." He nodded. "It feels weird, you know?" Seeing his questioning look, she elaborated, "Real food, not that hospital crap." She absentmindedly started playing with her fork, twirling it between her fingers. "Everything I ate in that hell hole just came back up later. I am so glad to be out of there."

Elliot looked at her. She looked like she was caught up in the past, and he needed to draw her out of it. "You never mentioned that. I would have smuggled in food for you."

Olivia looked at him. "It's fine, El, don't worry about it." She gave him a halfhearted smile. "I'm home now."

Their eyes locked and neither could look away. Olivia felt her heart rate speed up. When had Elliot's eyes gotten so blue? It was like she was staring at the ocean, tides ebbing and flowing; she felt the pull, the drag, to her partner. It was like he had a hold over her. She had tried to leave, but was always drawn back to the man sitting next to her.

Elliot couldn't help but smile as he stared into Olivia's eyes. Those deep chocolate brown orbs, and what they were a window to, made his breathing quicken. This woman was so infuriating, so prickly, so _independent._ But when she was with him, looking at him, talking to him, it didn't matter; her words didn't matter, because he had a direct link to her soul, through those eyes. They held entire conversations just by a look. One glance could tell them all they needed to know, and what Elliot knew was that no matter how many times Olivia said she was fine, no matter how much she denied something, Elliot knew the truth, just by looking into her eyes.

Slowly and gently, he raised one hand to wipe some syrup off of the corner of Olivia's mouth. He was taking a huge risk, seeing as how she was awake now, and would definitely remember this. But he decided not to be afraid anymore; this was the time to take risks, and he didn't want to live without knowing any longer.

Olivia's eyes widened as she felt Elliot lightly brush her lip.

He smiled. "Syrup," he said quietly as an explanation.

She nodded, lips parting slightly as Elliot's hand moved to cup her cheek softly. He repositioned himself so that he was closer. He couldn't believe that she wasn't running away; she seemed to shocked right now to do anything.

His head was telling him to take what small prizes he could get right now and not to push it. But his heart was telling him to go for it, to leave all fear behind, make that leap, and just hope that Olivia would be jumping right beside him.

Moving slowly, giving her time to object if she wanted, he leaned in and down, pulling her face up to meet his, cupping the back of her neck gently. Timidly, his lips brushed over hers. It was nothing like the raw passionate kiss he had always imagined, but it seemed more _right_ this way. Small and chaste, a perfect first kiss.

Olivia watched him move closer, as she tried to restart her brain. Then when their lips met, all hope was lost. She couldn't think, she couldn't breathe; she had wanted this for so long, but she had never thought that he would feel the same. They had been best friends for almost twelve years; she had stood by his side as he and Kathy went through a messy divorce, and she had stood by his side as they got back together, trying to make things work for the sake of the unexpected child Kathy had been carrying. She had watched as he had tried to convince the world how happy he was with his family, and she had watched, again, as he and Kathy finally admitted that a baby wasn't a good enough reason to stay married. She knew how much family meant to him, and she knew how much he loved his children. And she had been relieved when he had finally admitted that he didn't love his wife anymore.

Olivia closed her eyes and just enjoyed the feel of him on her. This was becoming officially her favorite moment of her entire life.

Elliot drew back and opened his eyes. He watched as Olivia opened hers. Her expression still hadn't changed, and Elliot was a little worried. Maybe he shouldn't have done that. Feeling embarrassed now, he pulled back further and looked down.

Slowly the minutes passed, with Olivia still sitting in shock, brain still not working, and Elliot looking down at his hands, trying to imagine what his partner was thinking, and wishing that he had listened to his head.

A full five minutes later, Elliot looked up and straight ahead, avoiding Olivia's eyes, not willing to see the awkward condescending let-down expression he was sure would be there. He got up and started to head for the door.

"I'm uh…" he stuttered as he walked away. "I'm just gonna-"

"I need you too."

Elliot stopped in his tracks. He stared at the door, gut clenching. It was quiet, but he had heard her. It rang a bell in his mind, he would never forget the rambling speech he had given at her bedside in that hospital. But she had been in a coma. How had she-?

"You heard me?" he asked just as quietly, slowly turning around to face his partner. He needed to look at her now, as afraid as he had been to do so just a few minutes ago, he needed to be able to see the expression in her eyes.

They were shining. Glistening. There were tears there, refusing to fall, but a smile on her face that made him believe they were good tears, not bad. There was something else too, a strange look that Elliot couldn't decipher.

Olivia painfully got off of the stool and walked to her partner. Stopping in front of him, she took a hold of his hand, squeezing gently. Rising up on her toes, she softly kissed his cheek. Pulling back, she smiled. "Of course I did," she replied.

Elliot just stared. She had heard him confess his love for her, yet she wasn't running. She had said she needed him. Did that mean-?

Olivia watched the gears turning, and she could guess what he was thinking. Although she thought he looked adorable when he was confused and thinking, she decided to ease his fears. She leaned up again, this time grazing her lips across his, just as gently as he had done earlier. Pulling back again, she took her free hand and moved it up to brush across his cheek and down to the back of his neck.

And then, in an almost whisper, "For the record, I love you too."

_Sorry it's so short, I was going to keep going, but I think this is a good place to stop. And I know how I'm going to start the next chapter, so hopefully it won't take as long for the next update._

_Please guys, reviews totally make my day!_


	22. Chapter 22

**Some more light fluff, and the return of another old-new character!**

**And, uh, I'm just gonna say, most of this was written at 3am, so I really hope it makes sense!**

**All right, I'm loving the reviews; I'm so close to breaking a hundred, please help me out! =]**

**Disclaimer: if I owned them I wouldn't be a broke college student =]**

Three words. Just three words. So simple, yet they meant so much. And the fact that it was Olivia saying them meant so much more.

Never before had Olivia said that to a man. She was shocked that the words had come out of her mouth so effortlessly. But she meant it, with all her heart. She was tired of running, tired of dating random losers, all of whom were fine for a couple of weeks, until they found out what she did. Sometimes they were cool with it, until the fourth or fifth canceled date, or up until they met her partner. Her overbearing, overprotective, _jealous_ partner. That was usually when they flew the coop, and she was left alone again, knowing but not wanting to admit, to the reason why it had ultimately failed. Because each of those random losers, as nice as they had been, had one major flaw: none of them were Elliot.

Elliot just stood there. He had to be at least as shocked as Olivia. In all of his years of pining after his partner, he had never guessed, never allowed himself to imagine that she might feel the same way. But here it was, undeniable proof. She had heard every single word, every single reason he had uttered in that room, and she was here, telling him that she felt the same way.

Elliot moved their interlocked hands up and took a step forward, so that the hands were sandwiched between their bodies, making it easy for the other to feel the accelerated heartbeats. With his free hand, he gently brushed the bangs out of Olivia's face, taking his time to tuck the hair behind her ear. They still hadn't broken eye contact.

Elliot leaned down again, and this time, he wasn't holding back. It was the sort of kiss that one would expect to find in the closing scene of a romantic movie; on a beach, at sunset, with the light casting a perfect glow across the water, cheesy music playing in the background as the credits rolled. It was the kind of kiss that would wake Sleeping Beauty and make the most hardened criminal get misty-eyed. It was perfect.

Elliot attempted to deepen the kiss, pushing forward with his tongue, requesting entrance. Olivia willingly complied, opening her mouth with a moan as their tongues met and battled for dominance.

Eventually the need to breathe overrode everything else, and the detectives broke apart, gasping for air. Olivia's eyes were wide as she stared at her-what was he now? The term 'friend' certainly wasn't good enough anymore, but she wasn't sure exactly where they were going. Boyfriend? Olivia could only hope, with all her heart.

Elliot smirked. There were no words that could properly describe what he was feeling right now. "Wow," was all he could manage.

Olivia's eyes narrowed and she smiled back. "I know," she agreed.

Elliot removed the hand that was currently gripping her neck and reached down to grasp her other hand, so that both hands were now interlocked between their chests. "I love you," he said quietly.

Olivia kept smiling. "I know," she repeated.

Elliot nodded. "But I wanted to say it, now that I _know_ you can hear me."

Olivia laughed gently, and moved, if it was possible, closer to the man standing in front of her. She squeezed her hands in his tightly, relishing in the close contact they were sharing, and thinking that if this was a dream, she didn't ever want to wake up. "How thoughtful of you," she quipped.

Elliot laughed with her. "That's me," he chuckled. "I am a very thoughtful person. Why words simply fail me at how thoughtful I-"

He was cut off abruptly as Olivia's mouth was on his, again. It was slow and sweet and passionate. Heavenly. Elliot had never felt this way with Kathy; a simple kiss had never meant so much.

When they broke apart this time, Elliot let go of Olivia's hands to circle her with his arms. His hands slid down to cup her ass, drawing her closer into a hug. He felt, more than heard, Olivia's small gasp, and pulled back immediately.

"Liv?" he asked worriedly. He hadn't meant to hurt her, he just needed to be close. He felt incredibly guilty.

Olivia tried to smile at the guilt and fear on his face. "I'm fine, El," she attempted to reassure him.

But he wasn't buying it. "Come on, Liv, you should go back to bed." He tried to lead her back towards the bedroom, but she vehemently refused.

"Nuh uh," she stated, digging her heels in. "I'm not going back to the bedroom to laze about all day."

Elliot stopped and turned to face her. "Olivia, come on, you need to rest. You just got out of the hospital, please, don't be this-"

He was cut off again, this time by a hand clamping across his mouth. Olivia laughed at the look on his face as she silenced him. "I'm not saying I won't rest, El, I just don't want to go back to the bedroom."

She removed her hand and made to rest it back by her side, but Elliot grabbed it before she could do so. He brought her hand back up to his mouth and kissed it softly. He kept kissing, exploring every little crevasse of the limb, eyes never once breaking contact.

A full minute later, and Olivia decided that, as much as she was enjoying this, she needed to sit down or fall down. She cleared her throat before speaking. "As much as I'm loving this, El, and believe me I am-" she cut off with a gasp as Elliot moved from her hand to her neck, assaulting a pulse point just below her ear. "Seriously, El," she panted, trying to think around the attack her partner was waging. "Elliot!" she yelled, pulling him back, slightly harsher than she had intended. She felt guilty, seeing the look on his face as she did so. It said quite clearly that he was thinking that he knew it was too good to be true.

When he started to pull back completely, she gripped his arm tightly. "And where do you think you're going, mister?" she questioned.

Elliot looked at her, confused. "I was just-" he stammered.

Olivia shook her head. "No you weren't," she retorted. "As I was going to say, before you ended all rational thought-" she grinned, trying to make it seem genuine, despite the fact that her breathing was becoming more labored with all the standing she had been doing this morning. "Would you mind if we just-I don't know-moved it over to the couch?"

Elliot paused for a moment. Now that he was really looking, he could see how tired Olivia was, and how hard she was trying to hide it. She was literally, about thirty seconds from falling over. "Of course, Liv," he replied sheepishly. How could he have not noticed? "I'm sorry," he added, as he led his partner over to the couch. The two of them sat down together.

Olivia curled her legs up underneath her and leaned into Elliot's chest, sighing contentedly. "This is nice," she said tiredly, eyes closed and a small grin on her face.

Elliot gently stroked her hair with one hand, while the other wrapped protectively around her on the back of the couch. "Yeah, it is," he whispered comfortably.

* * *

Simon Marsden looked up at the front doors of the 1-6 precinct. He was scared of what would be behind those doors, but he knew he needed to go in, to find out what had happened to his sister. He had been so surprised to return from a family vacation to a blinking red light on his answering machine that tore his world apart. He had only known he had a sister for three years, but something in him had just gravitated towards her, _his big sister_, ever since he had found out she existed. He loved her, she was family, and he needed to know the truth, now, no matter how bad it was.

With a deep breath, he looked over at the woman and young boy who accompanied him. Lucy stared back. Reassuringly she grasped his hand and squeezed. Lucy was nervous too; she had gotten to know Olivia slowly, after that first meeting where the woman had flat out lied to her face. And despite the first impression, she liked her husband's sister, very much. Olivia was kind and gentle, she really seemed to enjoy being an aunt. And she had been touched when Lucy had asked her to be her maid of honor at the wedding. Lucy crossed her fingers and prayed that the woman was OK. Simon had told her everything, about their father, his ignorance of it, and how Olivia had found him. Olivia had shared some small details of her childhood, and even the little snippets Lucy had learned were enough to make her wince. The woman didn't deserve to have anything bad happen to her; she had already suffered through enough. When Simon looked at her, she smiled.

"We're both here for you, honey," she assured him.

Simon nodded, smiling as his stepson, Cory, gave him a hug. Together, the small family walked into the precinct, ready to offer support to each other if needed.

**XXX**

Munch looked at the door for the fiftieth time that morning. He slapped himself mentally as he realized that he was waiting for Olivia and Elliot to walk through the door. Olivia wouldn't be back for a while, and Cragen had given Elliot the week off, to ensure that she did nothing that would risk sending her back to the hospital.

Fin looked at his partner and smirked, noting the wistful glance towards the doors, _again_. "Stop looking, man," he said, "Neither of them are walking through that door today."

Munch tore his gaze away and glared at his partner. "You're telling me you don't wish they were here?" he retorted.

Fin sighed and shook his head. "Of course I do. This place gets way too quiet and _way_ too boring without Benson and Stabler; the yelling, the fights, the sexual tension. It's like a soap opera in here, man."

Munch laughed along with his partner. "I have a theory about that-" he started, but was cut off quickly by the detective sitting across from him.

"Shut up, please, I'm begging you." And it did sound like Fin was begging. "Please, Munch, I can't deal with your crazy conspiracies alone. Can't you just, like, hold it in until Liv gets back? She knows how to deal with you."

Munch glared again. "The last time our beautiful friend-how did you put it, 'dealt' with me-I ended up with a broken nose!"

Fin matched his gaze evenly. "That's because you were trying to show her where the government had hid their secret listening devices on her body." He shook his head again, laughing, "You're lucky she didn't break your neck."

Munch sighed elaborately. "It is my fate to be misunderstood by inferior individuals."

Fin groaned at the exaggerated behavior. "You're just lucky Stabler didn't see you. You probably wouldn't have walked away from that encounter."

Munch opened his mouth to retort, but before he could, he saw Fin's attention waiver, and he turned to look as a family walked through the doors he had been so engrossed in all morning. They all looked worried, and he wondered what they were doing here.

Fin stood up and walked towards them. "I'm Detective Tutuola, can I help you with something?" he asked gently.

The man looked up at the detective in front of him. He guessed this was Fin, from his sister's descriptions. She had told him a lot of stories, and he had wanted to meet Olivia's work partners-apart from Elliot, whom he had already met-for a while now. He wished it was under better circumstances.

"Is she OK?" was all that he could get out.

Fin frowned, confused. He didn't know this man, yet there was something-_familiar-_about him. Before he could ask what the man meant, he heard the captain walk up behind him. Turning around slightly to acknowledge the older man's presence, he was handed a file.

"The Kosten case," Cragen barked. "Jo said to be prepared, the defense doesn't have a leg to stand on, so they're trying to attack the officers who did the arresting."

Fin nodded, tossing the file onto his desk. "Got it, Cap," he replied, before turning back to the family in front of him. But again, before he could speak, he was interrupted.

"Captain Cragen?" It came out as a question. Simon had never met Olivia's commanding officer, but that was who he assumed this was. He recognized the voice from that horrible message.

Cragen turned around to take in the man, woman, and child in his squad room. He was instantly frozen to the spot. _He had Olivia's eyes_. He remembered his detective's-well, let's call them 'troubles'-a few years back. Thawing now, he made an educated guess as to who this was, and moved forward to stand next to Fin.

"I'm Captain Cragen," he replied, extending his hand to Olivia's brother.

Simon took it gratefully. "Simon Marsden, I'm sorry it took me so long to come, we were on vacation and just got back last night. I got your message-" Simon cut off and gulped. He really didn't want to ask the question he had come to ask, but he had to know. "Is she…?"

Cragen smiled. It was remarkable how concerned and _brotherly_ this man was, considering he had only known he _was_ a brother for three years. "She's fine," he assured the man. "Got out of the hospital yesterday."

Fin and Munch were confused. Who was this man, and why did he seem to be so concerned with Olivia? And how did Cragen know him?

Cragen looked at his other detectives and his smile widened at their similar puzzled expressions. It didn't take a genius to figure out that Olivia had never mentioned her new-found family to her coworkers. Nodding to them now, he decided that introductions were in order. "Fin Tutuola, John Munch, I don't believe you've ever met Simon, Olivia's half brother?"

If the puzzled look was amusing to watch, it was nothing compared to the hilarity of the flabbergasted expressions they were wearing now.

Simon had to smile too. He wasn't offended that Olivia hadn't mentioned him. He had learned by now that his sister kept her secrets. She guarded them closely, it was the one thing she really took away from her childhood. "It's nice to meet you," he said politely. Nodding to the woman and child next to him, he introduced his family. "This is my wife, Lucy, and my stepson Cory." As he said their names, they each smiled and gave a small wave.

"I can have someone take you to her apartment if you'd like," Cragen offered.

Any reply was cut off by two more additions to the group currently standing by the door blocking the entrance.

"Hey guys, what's up?" Alex asked as she and Casey decided just joining the group would be simpler than trying to worm their way through the crowd.

Fin looked at the two former ADA's and smirked. "Apparently, Liv's _brother_," he exaggerated, hoping for a big reaction.

Lucy turned around as the two women made their presence known, and gasped. "Casey!" she cried, moving over to give the woman a hug. "It's been so long, how was Africa?"

Everyone was now staring at them, stunned. "Case, how do you about all of this?" Munch asked politely, trying to mask his shock.

Casey returned the woman's hug wholeheartedly, then turned to face the group, smiling. "Olivia and I took Lucy dress shopping in the city last year, to get her wedding dress."

Lucy grinned. "Which I thank God for, every day; if it was just me, we would have had a galaxy-sized fashion disaster!"

Everyone chuckled at that, breaking some of the mounting tension.

"So you knew that Liv had a brother," Fin clarified.

Casey nodded. "They invited me to the wedding-" taking on a mock snotty expression and voice, she continued, "as well they should have, after all of my _wonderful_ help picking out the dresses! Olivia's maid of honor dress was quite exquisite, if I don't say so myself."

Lucy laughed at the playful banter, and then coughed delicately. "Actually, Casey, I think Olivia picked out that dress."

Casey deflated, still smiling. "You just have to deny me of my glory, don't you?" she huffed, joking. She looked back at the rest of the group. "Yes, I did know that Olivia has a brother, and before you ask-" she paused, looking around the group, knowing it would be on their minds, "Elliot knows too."

Simon shifted his weight. He was enjoying talking with these people, he really wanted to get to know Olivia's friends. But right now, he really needed to see his big sister.

Cragen noticed Simon's distracted movements, and knew what he was thinking about. "Why don't I get you a ride to Olivia's," he offered the man, noting the grateful expression that spread across his face at the words. He internally shook his head. This man really did resemble Olivia, a lot.

The next second, he was laughing, as every single member of the tiny crowd quickly volunteered to take the small family to Olivia's apartment.

_Wow, this chapter came at me kind of weird. I started writing from the beginning, then two paragraphs in, I stopped and started writing another part-it was all out of order, so I hope it flows OK._

_This chapter was so much longer than I thought it would be! I just started writing and couldn't stop!_

_And I totally meant to bring Simon in, literally about ten chapters ago! I was going to have him show up at the hospital, but, sadly and embarrassingly, I completely forgot until now, but I want him to be a part of this story, so I figured out a way to add him. Hope it works =]_

_Reviews make me happy! Please? Pretty please? With cherries on top? Ok, maybe not cherries, since I don't like them, but how about whipped cream-no, not really a big fan of that either-maybe oreos, or chocolate chips, hell anything chocolate—yeah, we'll go with that. _

_Moral of the story: please review!_


	23. Chapter 23

**Disclaimer: You all know what goes here...  
**

Elliot cursed under his breath when he heard the buzzer. Olivia had fallen asleep a few hours ago with her head propped up on his lap, and he couldn't move. He was enjoying this. Cuddling, that's what he thought it was called. He had never really done this much with Kathy. But with Olivia, he just wanted to be near her. He thought up a particularly foul string of curses for whoever had shown up and interrupted this perfect day.

But he didn't want the sound to wake her up, so he carefully extracted himself from his partner, resting her still sleeping body on the couch. She stirred a bit, but didn't wake up.

Elliot walked over to the intercom and pressed the button to talk. "Who is it?" he asked quietly.

There was a pause, and then: "Simon Marsden."

Elliot started. And all of a sudden he felt like an idiot. He had been there, three years ago when Olivia had found out she had a brother. He had been her support, her rock, her anchor. And when Olivia had ended up in the hospital, he had completely forgotten that she did indeed have family out there, people who were related to her by blood, who would want to know what was going on.

Elliot pressed the button, letting his partner's brother into the building, and waited in the entrance until he heard knocking.

What surprised him now was the crowd he saw when he opened the door. Simon was there, along with, well he didn't really remember her name, but he thought she was his girlfriend-at least, she had been three years ago. She was holding onto a young boy, maybe nine or ten. Behind them stood Munch and Fin. And behind them were Alex and Casey.

Elliot shook his head and chuckled. "If you want to come in, come in," he said quietly. "But keep it down, she's asleep."

He moved back and let them all file in, with minimal amount of noise. There were quiet 'awws' from the girls as they saw Olivia curled up so innocently on the couch. She looked very restful.

Elliot quietly put a finger to his lips, telling them all to shut up, and walked over the couch. He gently picked up his partner in his arms, being very careful of her injury, and praying that she didn't wake up; moving slowly, he walked back towards the bedroom, and placed Olivia in her bed. Here, he stopped for a moment to consider. She was still wearing sweatpants, which were very comfortable, but her shirt was probably less so. Noticing the crumpled up NYPD shirt laying on the bed, Elliot assumed she had tried to change, but it hadn't gone well.

Now he had a problem. He wanted her to be comfortable, but he didn't want her to think he was taking advantage of her state. After a few moments of internal debate, comfort won out. He carefully sat her up and removed her shirt. _God, she looks beautiful_, he thought ruefully, then cursed himself. He wasn't doing this to admire his almost half-naked partner/ (?) girlfriend. He wasn't sure what to call her anymore, but he really hoped what they had started that morning would continue. Gently, he replaced the old shirt with the new one, which he recognized to be his own, and therefore several sizes too big. That done, he lay her back down on the bed.

After tucking her in and kissing her forehead, he walked back out to join the group gathered in the living room.

**XXX**

When he returned to the living room, he noted that no one had relaxed; they were all still standing awkwardly around the furniture. They all turned to watch as Elliot walked back.

Elliot smiled as he joined them. He held his hand out to Simon, who took it rather nervously. "Simon, how are you?" he asked uncomfortably. He still felt guilty for not calling the man sooner.

Simon shrugged his shoulders. "I've been better," he replied. Elliot had to chuckle at that, it was just the kind of answer that he would expect Olivia to make.

They let go, and Simon put his arm around Lucy, squeezing her closer. "I don't know if you ever met my wife, Lucy, or her son Cory?"

Elliot nodded to the woman and child and smiled. "Nice to meet you." He looked back at Simon. "I didn't know you got married. Congratulations."

Simon smiled his thanks, but questioned, "Olivia never told you? She was there."

Elliot looked surprised. Olivia had never mentioned a wedding. She hadn't even brought up her new found brother in several years. "She never brought it up," he said quietly.

Lucy leaned into her husband as she watched her sister-in-law's partner's confusion. She felt caught up in a whirlwind, ever since they had stepped into the precinct. She liked all of these people, very much, but she felt like she was on the outside of an intimate circle. She felt like she was missing something. And she tried not to feel too offended that Olivia had never mentioned her brother's wedding to her best friends. She spoke up. "It was last year," she supplied as Elliot's eyes shifted to her. "Olivia was my maid of honor."

Elliot tried to unfreeze his brain. Olivia had been asked to be the maid of honor at her brother's wedding, and she hadn't told him. He knew things had been strained between the two of them for a while, but he had never thought she would keep something this big from him. "Well, congratulations," he said again. He turned to the rest of the group. "And may I ask what you all are doing here?" he tried to change the subject.

Casey shook her head. "We wanted to see Olivia," she stated, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

The rest of them nodded. "How's she doing?" Fin asked.

Elliot turned towards the closed bedroom door, staring at it as if he could see through it. "She's happy to be home," he replied, lost in thought. "She's tired," he added, "as I'm sure you all could tell." They chuckled. "She's going to be fine," he finished.

They all looked at Elliot. There was something in his voice that had changed. The way his voice _caressed_ the words as he spoke about his partner. It was loving and caring; those emotions had always been there, but they had never heard Elliot express it so openly.

Munch, Fin, Alex, and Casey looked at each other, smiling. Something had definitely changed, and all of them believed it was for the better.

Simon and Lucy shared a look of their own; Olivia had let a few things slip concerning her partner, and judging from the way he was speaking now, it seemed some of those feelings were reciprocated.

Elliot saw the looks being traded across the living room, and he smirked. It didn't take a genius to figure out that they were all wondering what the hell had happened between him and Olivia. Deciding to just let them wonder, he and Olivia hadn't discussed telling other people just yet, he gestured to the furniture. "You guys want to sit?" he asked, taking a seat on the couch, settling in comfortably.

Everyone else followed suit; Munch and Fin filled up the couch, while Alex took the sofa arm next to Munch, and Casey occupied the recliner next to her. Lucy and Simon went to the love seat, Lucy pulling Cory up on her lap, securing him with her arms.

An awkward silence descended over the room, broken by Fin briefly as he told Elliot, "I called Melinda on the way over here," he said, "She's going to come by after work."

Elliot nodded, and the silence fell again.

After a few minutes, Munch decided to speak up. He was curious about Olivia's brother. He wondered how they had met, and when, and most importantly, _why_ Olivia had never mentioned it. He cleared his throat. "So, Simon," he started. Everyone looked at him. "How did you and Olivia connect the dots?"

Simon looked from Lucy to Elliot, and chuckled. "All her," he said. "I was just living my life, and all of a sudden this chick shows up and says she's my sister."

Munch looked confused. "But how-"

Elliot cut him off. "Liv ran her DNA, Simon popped up as a familial match."

Fin chimed in. "So do you like having a sister?" he questioned.

Simon grinned. "You bet I do," he laughed. "Having her be a detective certainly paid off too."

Only Elliot knew what he was talking about, as he referred to his legal troubles from three years ago. Olivia had been the one to exonerate him, and he would be forever in her debt for that.

Seeing all of the confused faces, Elliot let Simon off the hook. "Long story," he said to the room.

"I always wanted a big sister," Simon continued. "Finding out I had one was incredibly strange and a sort of out-of-body experience, but really cool."

Simon died off, and the room was quiet again. They were all thinking the same thing, but Alex was the one to finally voice it. "So your dad…" Alex trailed off.

Simon and Elliot both shifted uncomfortably. They were treading in dangerous waters right now.

"I had no idea," Simon assured her. "He was my dad, seemed like a normal guy. He died about ten years ago."

Alex nodded, content. For a while, the group made small talk across the living room, discussing nothing of real importance.

When the buzzer sounded again, Fin stood up quickly. "That's probably Mel," he rushed, heading over to the door to let her in.

Munch chuckled. "Somebody's got it bad," he commented.

Fin didn't seem to hear him, though everyone else laughed. At the quiet knock, he opened the door to reveal Melinda standing there. "Hi," he smiled awkwardly, stepping back to let the ME into the apartment.

"Hi," Melinda replied, just as awkwardly. As she stepped passed the detective, their hands brushed against each other. Their eyes met and the awkwardness in them changed to compassion.

Fin coughed and followed Melinda back to the living room, where he reclaimed his position on the couch. Melinda nodded to everyone and sat on the unoccupied sofa arm. Noticing the three people residing on the love seat, whom she had never met, but assumed they were close to Olivia somehow, decided to introduce herself.

"I'm Melinda," she said, holding her hand out to the man to shake.

He took it, smiling back. "Simon," he replied. "Olivia's brother." That got a surprised look out of Melinda, who looked around the room to verify. Seeing the affirmative nods from everyone, she turned back. Simon nodded to his family. "My wife Lucy, my stepson Cory."

Melinda smiled at the rest of them, brain still reeling. How had she not known about this? Melinda knew Olivia's family history, how had the detective known? "How-" she started, trying to find the right words to ask the question.

Simon just kept smiling. "She ran her DNA," he explained.

Melinda felt like an idiot. She remembered, three years ago. Olivia had given her a DNA sample, asked her to run it for familial matches. One had kicked back. How the hell had she missed this? Trying to put all of this out of her head, she forced a smile. "Nice to meet you," she said politely.

The silence descended again, and everyone looked uncomfortable. They weren't sure what they were doing there; all of them wanted to see Olivia, but she was asleep, so why were they still hanging around? And what were they supposed to talk about while they waited?

**XXX**

Olivia woke up in stages. She was much too comfortable to still be on the couch, where she was certain she had fallen asleep, _on Elliot_. He had been her pillow. Opening her eyes now, she recognized her bed, and her bedroom. _These pillows aren't nearly as comfortable_, she thought ruefully.

Attempting to sit up, she was greeted by the now familiar stabbing pain in her stomach. She also noticed something else. She was now wearing the shirt she had tried, in vain, to put on before breakfast. It seemed Elliot had taken the initiative and completed the task for her. She didn't know whether to feel thankful or embarrassed that he had seen her in just a bra.

Biting her lip to keep the groans of pain from escaping her lips, she carefully extracted herself from the covers and sat up. She took a deep breath to steady herself, and then stood up. The stabbing turned to a throbbing, and it took all of her willpower not to cry out or flop back down on the bed.

Moving slowly, she walked to the door and opened it. "Elliot?" she called out softly.

Elliot heard her, as the soft conversation died down and they all looked towards the bedroom. He quickly stood up and rushed towards his partner.

Seeing her, he was again breathless. This woman had no idea of the hold she had over him. She was beautiful, graceful, strong, and resilient. She was smart, and dedicated, and continually made him want to be a better person.

He had no idea that the woman in front of him was thinking the exact same thing as she watched him walk towards her.

"What's up, Liv?" he asked, finally finding his voice.

Olivia took a breath, trying to get her own bearings. She looked him in the eyes and smiled, a little impish grin that had Elliot immediately on guard. "You trying to take advantage of me Stabler?" she quipped as she took his offered hand and let him lead her back to the living room.

Elliot looked at her, confused. "What are you talking about?"

Olivia smirked. "I mean that the shirt I woke up in is definitely not the one I went to sleep in," she remarked, as they reached the living room.

Elliot stopped. He couldn't tell if she was playing with him, or genuinely upset. "Liv-" he started, not even knowing how he was going to finish the sentence.

But he didn't have to. As soon as he started to speak, Olivia placed her hand on his cheek. Her smile this time was genuine as she said, "thanks." Turning now to the room, she was completely surprised to find it so full. But the biggest surprise was sitting on her love seat. "Simon! Lucy, Cory, what are you guys doing here?" she asked, moving carefully forward to hug them as they sprung from their seats.

Simon grasped her gently, not wanting to hurt her. "You got shot, Olivia, I'm not allowed to come and see you?"

Olivia chuckled as she let go, moving over to give Lucy a hug. "Touché," she joked, releasing her sister-in-law. She looked down at her nephew, and smiled. "I'd kneel down to give you a hug, buddy, but I'd never be able to get back up again," she said apologetically, ruffling his hair.

Cory smiled up at his aunt. He didn't care if she was related by blood or not, the same way he didn't care if Simon was his biological father. She was family, and he loved her. He put his arms around her waist and clutched her tightly, not seeing the wince of pain flash across her face as he intensified the throbbing pressure in her abdomen. He spoke for the first time. "Hi, Aunt Olivia." He buried his face in her shirt as tears leaked out of his eyes to be absorbed by the cotton.

Simon and Elliot noticed the pain in Olivia's eyes, and knew she wouldn't push the child back. Simon reached over to unlock his stepson's arms from his sister's body. "Come on, Cory," he chided, "Let's let Aunt Olivia sit down."

As Cory pulled back, Simon caught the gratitude in the gaze she shot him.

As Elliot guided her over to the vacated seat on the couch that had been occupied by Munch until Olivia walked in the room, she couldn't help but think about what a wonderful father Simon was. Cory really loved him. The little boy also really seemed to love his Aunt Olivia. No matter how much she heard that, she couldn't get used to the fact that she was an aunt. She wished she could see her family more often.

Now that she was in the room, all attention had shifted her way. Olivia was feeling slightly uncomfortable with all of the eyes on her.

"How are you feeling?" Fin was the first to ask. He had turned sideways on the couch so that he was facing Olivia.

Olivia smiled at her friend. "I'm fine," she stated reassuringly.

It did nothing to reassure anyone. They all knew the woman would lie out of her ass even if she was on her deathbed. More than one of them wanted to contradict that statement, but, catching the eye of her overprotective partner, who had subtly put his arm around her shoulders, drawing her closer to him, they decided they didn't need the Stabler wrath. So they all let it slide.

Munch had circled the couch to stand behind Olivia. He put a hand on her shoulder now, and when she looked up at him he asked, "So when do you think you'll be back?"

Fin reached over and pushed his partner lightly. "Why don't we give her a minute to catch her breath, man!" he chided. "She only got out of the hospital today."

Olivia smiled at the two of them. "Give me a week or so, John," she said positively.

Elliot shook his head, groaning. He had been afraid of this. Olivia wouldn't just rest. She would be out, exercising, building her stamina and muscle back up, and she would be in the office, demanding that Cragen let her come back, too soon. She would push herself too hard, refusing to admit that she wouldn't be in top shape right off the bat.

Olivia heard the groan and turned to face her partner. "You got something to say, Stabler?" she asked somewhat rudely. But there was a playful smirk on her face, which negated the tone of voice.

Elliot shook his head. He didn't want to oppose, especially when she was in this mood. Determined. Heaven help anyone who crossed her. "I just think you should take it easy, Liv," he implored. "You don't need to push it."

Olivia glared at him. She knew he was saying this because he cared about her, but she didn't want to hear it right now. She was tired of dealing with the stares, the constant tiredness, the persistent pain. She just wanted things to go back to the way they were. A part of her brain fell in love with Elliot just a little more for his concern, but mostly she was annoyed that he was bringing reality crashing back down. Why couldn't she be blissfully ignorant, just for a little while?

That look had Elliot quickly receding. "Just a thought," he backtracked.

Olivia's gaze softened as she deflated, and leaned into him again. "I know," she whispered.

Realizing the time, and that Olivia had missed lunch because she was asleep, Elliot offered to order pizza for the lot of them. Getting a unified approval, he took down requests and went into the kitchen to order.

In his absence, Simon gravitated over to take the vacant seat. He too placed his arm around Olivia's shoulders, in a comforting brotherly fashion, watched by the rest of the group, amused at the sibling display.

"Thanks for coming, Simon," Olivia said, leaning her head to rest on his shoulder.

Simon just squeezed her shoulders. "Don't mention it," he replied. "We missed you."

"Yeah, Aunt Olivia," Cory chimed in, following his stepfather over to the couch and squeezing in on Olivia's other side, between her and Fin, who obligingly moved over to give the nine year old some room. "Are you gonna come visit us again soon?"

Olivia laughed and rested her arm on his shoulders, pulling him towards her. "I don't know buddy," she said, still chuckling.

Elliot returned to find his spot taken. He had to smile at the image of Olivia on the couch, with her brother on one side and her nephew on the other. _Surrounded by family._ It just looked right.

He sat down next to Lucy on the love seat and listened to the casual banter that was flying back and forth across the room. Nothing important was being discussed, they were all just reveling in the fact that Olivia was there, taking part in the conversation. She was home, and safe. Figuratively and literally, _she was with family._

**XXX**

Several hours and almost a dozen pizzas later, Olivia's eyelids were beginning to droop. Cory had moved to the floor by his aunt's feet, so Olivia was now being flanked by Elliot and Simon, both of whom were sitting very close, propping her up. She was leaning into Elliot now, and he could feel her falling asleep.

Catching Fin's eye, he jerked his head, hoping the man understood. They couldn't communicate through looks the way he and Olivia could, but Fin seemed to understand him-or maybe he just saw how exhausted Olivia was-because he started hinting to the crowd that it was time to leave.

Picking up the empty pizza boxes and plates, the group had the room restored to its former state in no time. Munch was the first to leave, claiming he had plans for the rest of the evening, which no one was brave enough to ask about. He ruffled Olivia's hair and squeezed her shoulder, and, with a quick good bye to the rest of the room, he left.

Casey and Alex were next; they paused to give Olivia a hug, promising to come see her again soon, before they, too, left.

Simon, Lucy, and Cory, though reluctant, followed them out soon after. They had a long drive back to New Jersey, and Cory had school the next day. They all gave Olivia awkward hugs, as she had yet to get up off of the couch-she was privately thinking that she wasn't even going to try, because she knew she'd never be able to make it-and headed out.

Melinda and Fin left together. They both gave Olivia the same clumsy hug; as Melinda made to let go, she grasped her arm before the ME could get completely away.

"I never said thank you," Olivia said quietly, in way of explanation.

Melinda shook her head. "You never had to," she replied. "You're my friend, I'm a doctor, I was doing my job."

Olivia smiled. "You saved my life," she stressed. "Thank you."

It was firm, sincere, and heartfelt. Melinda started at the amount of emotion in those two little words. "You're welcome," she said, before backing away and joining Fin by the door.

As the two of them left, Elliot came back and sat down next to Olivia. He pulled her closer to him, wrapping his arms around her protectively. "So, what do you want to do now?" he asked lamely, trying to find something to say to fill the silence.

Olivia sighed contentedly. "This," she whispered into his shirt.

Elliot smiled and stroked her hair.

_Wow, another really long chapter! I couldn't find a good place to end this, so I just kept writing until I came to one. Even if it did take all night =] one of these days, I'm going to need to stop staying up until 4am for no reason. I'm in for a rude awakening when I go out and meet the real world. But that's a year away, so for now, staying up all night and sleeping until 2 works for me!_

_Ok, no more updates until I get past 100 reviews! Come on guys, I'm almost there!_

_Next, will we see some apologies, from Jo and/or Huang? What does Olivia think on the matter? And how is her newfound relationship with Elliot blossoming? A visit from the kids? _

_All that, and more, if you REVIEW! =]_


	24. Chapter 24

**Wow, if all I had to do to get a bunch of reviews was to say I wouldn't update again until I got a certain amount, I would have done it ages ago!**

**Thanks to all of you, I'm glad you're enjoying the story**

**And thanks to Courtney Mae, who was my 100****th**** reviewer! Look for a special cameo appearance!**

**Disclaimer: I wish…**

"El, could you give me a hand?"

Elliot looked up from the sink, where he was washing the dishes from breakfast. The two of them had fallen asleep on the couch, and after eating, Elliot had sent Olivia back to the bedroom, and a more comfortable bed.

He put the sponge down and headed towards the sound of his partner's voice. "What's up, Liv?" he asked as he pushed the door open.

Olivia was standing in the middle of the room, looking frustrated. Elliot chuckled at her expression; it was the cutest thing he'd ever seen.

Olivia turned towards him, though she was pointedly looking at his left shoulder. "I want to take a shower," she explained, "but I can't seem to get my clothes off." She bit her lip nervously. She had a feeling they were venturing into awkward territory, but she _really_ wanted that shower. "I know this is a little weird, but do you mind…" she trailed off and finally looked Elliot in the eye.

Elliot smiled as he moved forward. "Sure," he replied.

Olivia caught the look of desire that passed across his face, and her gut clenched. She wanted him. Badly. But she knew that that particular craving would have to wait to be satisfied.

Elliot grasped the hem of her-well, _his_-NYPD shirt, pulling it up slowly, not breaking eye contact. Olivia raised her arms as high as she could, gritting her teeth through the pain, and Elliot slipped the shirt all the way off, tossing it on the bed.

Olivia felt self conscious. She was standing in front of Elliot in just a bra.

Elliot couldn't take his eyes off of her. She was beautiful, and he drank in the sight of her, topless, greedily. He ran his hands down her arms, then reached around to circle her and proceeded up her back, until he rested them once again on her shoulders. Taking one more step, he cupped her neck with one hand, and used the other to tilt her chin up, as his lips came crashing down on hers. Need, desire, passion, and lust were all present in that kiss, brought to the forefront and shared between the two of them. One simple gesture that only left them wanting more.

But eventually they had to break apart. Olivia, feeling very shortchanged, had to pull back when the burning in her stomach became too much to bear. With an apologetic grin, that successfully conveyed her reluctance to stop, she reached up to grasp Elliot's hands and pulled them down to his waist, squeezing tightly. She stood up on her tiptoes and placed one more gentle kiss on his lips. He could feel her smiling, and when she pulled back, he saw the grin, and the twinkle in her eyes as she told him, "I'm gonna go take a shower." She let go and started to head towards the door. Stopping before she got there, she turned around, suddenly nervous. "You'll be here, right?"

Elliot smiled and took two steps forward to take her in her arms again. Kissing her softly, he mumbled against her lips, "Always."

Reassured, Olivia smiled again, and headed out the door.

Elliot called after her. "Liv?"

She came back, leaning on the door frame. "Yeah?"

Elliot grinned mischievously. "Do you need any help with your pants?"

Olivia stared at him, shocked, for a moment, before smiling back just as impishly. "I think I'm good, El," she laughed.

As she turned around and headed back towards the bathroom, he heard her call out, "rain check!" and he laughed loudly. He was glad Olivia was still the same fun and playful person she had always been; getting shot hadn't changed anything. Well, things had changed, but it was all for the better.

Still grinning broadly, Elliot headed back out to finish the abandoned dishes still waiting in the kitchen.

* * *

"Fin, Munch, DB in Central Park."

The two detectives looked up at the familiar mantra, as Cragen walked out of his office.

"On it, Cap," Fin said, grabbing the pink slip and following his partner out the door.

Cragen looked around the nearly empty squad room and sighed. Things weren't the same without Benson and Stabler. Most of the detectives the Chief of D's had sent over to help out had gone back to their own precincts, and SVU was working on overdrive, trying to handle their workload while they were down two detectives. When Elliot came back, it would be easier, but Cragen was positive that the entire precinct would breathe a collective sigh of relief when Olivia walked through those doors again.

With one last look around the room, the captain turned around and walked back into his office, closing the door behind him.

* * *

"Melinda, what do we got?" Munch asked as he and Fin ducked under the tape to meet the medical examiner.

"Teenager, raped and strangled, most likely with a belt, I've got fluids," Melinda said without looking up. She gestured to the body, a young girl covered only in a piece of cardboard. "These stab wounds were all post mortem. Somebody's got a lot of rage." The ME finally stood up and faced the detectives. Looking at Fin now, she blushed.

After an awkward pause, Munch decided to go talk to the witnesses who had found the body, leaving detective and ME alone. Fin cleared his throat and stepped closer, so that no one could hear their conversation. "So, umm," he started nervously. He glanced up to meet her eyes once, then dropped his gaze again.

Melinda smiled. She loved how nervous he seemed to get around her. As cute as it was, she had to let him off the hook. "Dinner tonight?" she asked bluntly.

Fin looked up again, grateful. "That'd be great," he replied, just as Munch walked back up to them, effectively ending the conversation.

They all started walking back towards their cars. "I'll send the DNA to the lab," Melinda told the detectives. Before they separated, she stepped closer to Fin and whispered, "I'll come by the precinct around eight." Fin nodded his agreement, and with a smile and a wave, Melinda headed back to the morgue, and Munch and Fin got in their car and left to track down some leads.

* * *

"What are you doing here?" Elliot asked, shocked, as he stepped back to let Olivia's surprise guest in.

George Huang followed the detective into the kitchen silently. When Elliot gestured to the couch, Huang took a seat and let out a sigh. "Guilt," he finally responded.

Elliot leaned back against the wall, folding his arms across his chest. "Really?" he questioned.

Huang nodded. He didn't want to talk about this with the hot-headed half of the equation. "How is she?" he asked instead.

Elliot's eyes flickered towards the back of the apartment. "She'll be fine," he replied softly.

Huang looked down. "Does she…" he paused, looking back up. Elliot made no move to speak; he was going to make the doctor work for it. Huang took a breath and continued. "Does she blame me?"

Elliot waited a beat, and then smiled. It wasn't necessarily a friendly smile, more predatory, but it was better than a glare. No matter what anyone else thought, Elliot would never forget that it was the good doctor's suggestion that placed his partner in that morgue. Finally he answered, "Well, she _did_ ask me to remind her to kill you, but she might have been joking."

Huang gulped, but before he could answer, a door opened and Olivia walked out to join the two men. She was a little surprised to see the psychiatrist in her apartment; they weren't that close. But then, she could guess as to why he was there. "George?" Huang turned around to look at Olivia. "What are you doing here?"

Huang stood up quickly. "Olivia, how are you?" As openers go, it was pretty lame, but he couldn't think of anything better.

Olivia smiled and walked over to sit on the couch. Huang remained standing, looking even more awkward. "I'm fine, George," she replied, a little edgy.

Huang looked concerned. "Are you sure?" he asked again.

Olivia's smile disappeared, to be replaced by a scowl. Elliot, watching the scene as an observer, saw that scowl, and was instantly turned on. _Damn, she's gorgeous when she's pissed_, was the only coherent thought on his mind at that moment.

"I'm positive," Olivia glared. "And I'm getting ready to seriously maim the next person who asks me that."

Huang gulped again. "Well, then…" he trailed off uncertainly.

Olivia held the glare for another moment, and then let it go with a sigh. "Seriously Huang, either sit down or get out. You're making my neck hurt."

Elliot chuckled, and even Huang had to smile as he sat down on the couch, turning his body slightly so that he was facing Olivia.

"Olivia-" he started, but Olivia put up a hand, effectively cutting him off.

"Don't," she said.

Huang looked confused. "Olivia, I just-"

Again, he was cut off as Olivia stared at him firmly. "Stop, George," she said firmly. "None of this was your fault."

Elliot felt his heart expand as he listened to his partner. She would never blame anyone for what had happened; it had been a direct suggestion from Huang that had put her and Sophie in that morgue, and any normal person would blame the doctor, at least a little bit. But not Olivia. She would never let anyone feel that kind of guilt if it was in her power to stop it. He smiled for a different reason. His partner truly was a saint.

Huang was staring at his lap, refusing to meet Olivia's eyes. She was letting him off the hook, and he didn't think he deserved it. He felt a pressure on his shoulder and looked over to see Olivia's hand. She squeezed, and he finally looked up. The expression in her eyes was kindness, forgiveness, and a twinkle of humor.

"I'm serious," she continued, seeing the defiance in the doctor's eyes. "George, you can't blame yourself. Blame Sophie. Blame Paul. But we were all just doing our jobs, including you."

Now that he was looking, Huang couldn't break the eye contact. What he saw in the detective's eyes reassured him and consoled him. No matter how bad he was feeling, he did believe Olivia. She didn't blame him, so why did he blame himself? Huang took a deep breath, and his eyes were drawn back down to his lap. "Yeah," he whispered. He looked back up again. "Thanks."

Olivia nodded and squeezed his shoulder again. She looked up at Elliot, who was watching her with a _look_ on his face. Seeing his expression now, she realized that she needed to get the doctor out of her apartment. He was looking at her with a mixture of love, lust, passion, and desire in his eyes. Olivia was willing to bet that the apartment could be burning down, a bear could walk through the front door, and Huang could be dancing on the table wearing a hula skirt, and Elliot wouldn't notice. And if he kept looking at her like that, chances were that pretty soon she wouldn't notice either.

She had to look away before she _couldn't_ look away. Clearing her throat and hoping that Huang didn't notice her blush, she turned back to him. "Is that all?" she asked hurriedly.

Huang glanced over. There was something different in her expression. He couldn't place it, so he looked over at Elliot, wondering if the detective had noticed anything. Elliot wasn't paying any attention to him. His attention was fixed on his partner. There was a small smirk on his face, and his eyes were narrowed. Huang was suddenly very uncomfortable. He had been working with SVU for several years, and he, like everyone else, felt the connection between Elliot and Olivia. But he had been certain that they had not acted upon it; it seemed now that something had changed, of that he was positive.

Huang coughed uncomfortably. "Yeah," he said. He stood up quickly. "Thanks, Olivia." Olivia nodded. "And I'm sorry," he said quickly. He watched her open her mouth, and hurried on, "I know, you don't think I need to apologize, but I think that I do." Olivia closed her mouth and shook her head, exasperatedly. Huang looked back towards the door, wondering how fast he could make an escape now.

Olivia saw him looking for an exit, and smirked. The man was a psychiatrist, he worked for the FBI, it was asking way too much for him not to notice the sexual tension in the air right now. She could only pray he wouldn't mention it to anyone. She stood up. "Thanks for coming," she told him, giving him a light hug, which he returned.

With a nod to both of the detectives, Huang beat a fast retreat and left.

Elliot pushed himself off of the wall and walked towards Olivia, eyes glinting. Olivia, watching him, was reminded of predators stalking their prey. He grabbed her arms roughly, trying to remember that she was injured but not quite able to clamp down on the desire raging through his body, and pulled her towards him, crashing his lips down on hers.

After they broke apart, Elliot leaned forward to rest his forehead on hers. "I love you," he whispered.

Olivia closed her eyes and sighed contentedly. "I love you too," she whispered back, at the same time wondering why it was so easy to say it now. She had never been able to say those words to any other boyfriend. She had never heard it growing up, and was therefore always hesitant to believe it whenever someone said it to her. But when Elliot said it, she believed him. She knew he meant it. She had never trusted anyone the way she trusted him.

"Hey." Olivia opened her eyes again. Elliot looked concerned. "Is everything OK? You just kinda spaced out on me there."

Olivia smiled and looked down, a single tear leaking out of her eye and falling down her cheek. "It's nothing," she tried to deflect.

But Elliot wasn't having any of it. He lightly grasped her chin and raised her head so that she was looking at him. "Come on, Liv," he tried to persuade, "You know you can tell me anything."

Olivia looked into his eyes and felt more tears gather. She knew he would keep asking. He wouldn't let it go until he got an answer. "It's just that…" she paused to look down, briefly losing her nerve. She looked back up. There was a reason none of her other boyfriends had worked, and she was determined to make this one stick. "You're the only person who's ever said that to me that I actually believe."

Elliot felt his heart break with that simple comment. He knew that she hadn't exactly had the easiest life, but to be standing here, having accepted the fact, and telling him that she had never had someone seriously tell her that they love her? He knew that part of the reason her past relationships had failed was because she had given up. Elliot could only hope that he would be able to change her mind.

"I mean it Liv," he said, leaning down to kiss her again. "I'll always be here for you." He pulled her close and kissed her, deep and meaningful, hoping to show her that he was serious. He wrapped his arms around her, squeezing. Together the two of them fell backwards onto the couch, still wrapped around each other.

Elliot pulled back when he felt Olivia gasp against his mouth. Opening his eyes, he looked at her, concerned. "Are you OK?" he asked worriedly.

Olivia bit her lip and nodded. "I'm fine, El," she tried to assure him, but his attention was caught by something else.

"Liv, you're bleeding," Elliot gestured down to her shirt, running his hand across the stain.

Olivia looked down and groaned. "It's no big deal," she tried to stop him from worrying.

But it was too late. Elliot brought his eyes back up to focus on Olivia's face. "We need to get to a hospital Olivia," he stressed, pulling her up off of the couch behind him, and taking her hand and leading her out the door.

Olivia sighed. "Come on, El-" she started.

"No, Liv," Elliot cut her off, "You probably popped a staple, I don't care how many times you say you're fine, we're going."

Olivia opened her mouth to argue, then closed it. There was no use arguing with Elliot when he was in this mood.

Elliot sensed her acquiescence, and sighed in relief.

* * *

When they arrived at the hospital ER, Elliot led Olivia straight to the receptionist's desk. As he approached, he saw a nurse leaning over the desk filling out a form, her back to him.

"Excuse me," Elliot said as he drew up behind the nurse.

She turned around to take in the man and woman holding hands in front of her. "Hi!" she said cheerily. "I'm Courtney Mae, how can I help you?"

Elliot gestured to Olivia, who was thinking that she should let go of Elliot's hand, but not quite willing to actually do it. "My friend was just released from here a couple of days ago, and I think her wound may have reopened." He nodded to the blood stain on Olivia's shirt.

Courtney Mae nodded, still smiling. "We can definitely fix that," she said. She handed Elliot a form, telling him, "Why don't you fill this out, and when a doctor is available, someone will come and get you."

Elliot nodded and led Olivia over to two empty chairs and sat her down. He didn't bother giving the form to Olivia, despite her protests; he knew all of the answers. "Liv, please," he scolded, after the third time she tried to grab the clipboard. "Just relax, I can fill this out."

Olivia folded her arms, grumbling.

Elliot chuckled. She was cute when she sulked.

**XXX**

"Detective Benson?"

Elliot and Olivia looked up. They had been waiting for the better part of three hours, and Olivia was fading fast. Elliot was about ready to drag a doctor out by the throat to fix her up so that he could take her home and put her to bed.

Doctor Stevens was standing above them, looking at them incredulously. "What are you doing here?" she asked, taking note of the blood on the detective's shirt.

Elliot once again gestured to the stain. "I think she popped a stitch," he replied.

The doctor nodded, and looked around. "How long have you been waiting?" she asked curiously.

Elliot's mouth hardened. "Almost three hours," he said tightly.

Doctor Stevens paused. The detective had been out of the hospital for two days, spending three hours on these uncomfortable chairs was _not_ the best thing she could be doing right now. She sighed. "Come with me."

The doctor led Elliot and Olivia to an empty bed, where she motioned for Olivia to climb up. As she was stitching, Doctor Stevens asked the couple some questions. "How did this happen?" she asked, noticing the guilty look on Elliot's face, and the grimace on Olivia's.

As Elliot opened his mouth, Olivia beat him to it. "I just stretched in the wrong way," she said smoothly.

Doctor Stevens raised an eyebrow. "Really?" she double checked, "Because based on the looks you're both wearing, I think there's a lot more to it than that."

Elliot reached out to grasp Olivia's hand. "I pushed her onto the couch," he admitted, the guilt rising.

The doctor looked at Elliot now, eyes piercing. There was more to this story, clearly. "Is that all?" she fished.

Elliot glanced over at her, then back to his partner. "I may have fallen after her," he confessed.

Doctor Stevens nodded. She had a guess as to what they were doing when this happened, and she could tell that they didn't want to admit it. _A secret relationship,_ she thought, as she finished up. "Well, let's keep the _roughhousing_ to a minimum for a while," she admonished, emphasizing the word so that they would know it was a pseudonym. She wouldn't call them out on anything. She didn't care, as long as her patient was OK.

Elliot and Olivia looked properly abashed as the doctor stared at them.

As Doctor Stevens put the equipment away, she engaged them further. "Other than that, how are you Olivia?" she asked.

Olivia shrugged. "I'm fine," she replied, practically hearing Elliot's eyes thump in the back of his head as he rolled them.

Doctor Steven's must have too, because she turned around and put a hand on her hip. "I'm guessing Detective Stabler disagrees with you, but I trust that if something really feels wrong, you'll come back," she said.

Olivia nodded, glaring at Elliot for not thinking that she could handle a little pain.

The doctor saw the detectives out, again telling Olivia to come back if there were any problems, before leaving them at the entrance.

Olivia looked at Elliot for a moment, and then leaned into him. "Let's go home," she whispered, as his arms wrapped around her body lightly and drew her into a hug.

_So, what'd ya think?_

_Hope it was worth the wait._

_And….REVIEW! Pretty please?_


	25. Chapter 25

**Ok people, there's no need for threats! I promise I'm writing as fast as I can =]**

**Disclaimer: everything belongs to Dick Wolf and NBC**

"How long has he been like that?" Jo asked as she watched Elliot figuratively-but almost literally-bite off the head of yet another uniformed officer, and then curse out Munch for his 'chicken scratch handwriting that is worthy of doctor status' in the same breath.

Fin, listening to Munch's retort, which had something to do with aliens and government implantations, chuckled in amusement. "Pretty much since he showed up this morning," he told the ADA. "I think he's going through Benson-withdrawal."

Jo laughed with Fin this time. It made sense. Elliot hadn't even been back to work solo for four hours, and he was already turning into the Hulk. It was interesting to watch how he functioned without his partner; the answer, plain and simple, seemed to be that he didn't.

"I don't care what you think, Stabler, the sunglasses stay on!"

Everyone in the room turned to look at the normally calm and collective Munch, who had just blown up at the volatile and hot-headed Stabler.

Fin walked over to rest a hand on his partner's shoulder; the sergeant was still glaring daggers at Elliot. "Calm down, man," he tried to diffuse the tense atmosphere. He looked over at Elliot; he understood that the man was upset at having to work solo for now, and that he missed Olivia, but the attitude really needed to stop, _now_. "Elliot, take a few minutes, go cool off," he directed. He refused to deflate under the glare that he was getting. It seemed the world class Detective Stabler did not take to being given orders very well unless they came from Cragen or Olivia. Fin drew closer and lowered his voice. "Elliot, I get it, we all miss her." Elliot's eyes softened and he visibly drooped. Fin continued, "But you can't keep ripping into anyone around you simply because they're _there_."

Elliot took a deep breath, and looked up. There was gratitude in his eyes as he looked at Fin, and guilt as they flicked over to Munch. "Sorry, John," he apologized softly. Munch nodded, and, with one last look, Elliot headed out of the squad room to get some of that suggested fresh air.

Cragen came out of his office as Elliot left. At his entrance, everyone who had stopped what they were doing to watch the spectacle hurried to go back to work.

Cragen raised his eyebrow. "What did I miss?" he asked Fin and Munch curiously.

Fin sighed and shrugged. "Elliot being Elliot," he replied.

As Fin and Munch made to sit back down at their respective desks, Cragen crossed his arms across his chest. "I wasn't aware that he was that interesting," he commented.

Fin looked up at the captain. "When he's Elliot without Olivia," he smirked, "trust me Captain, he's quite a sideshow."

Cragen looked confused at that cryptic statement, while Fin dodged the pen Munch had thrown at him.

"Hey, man, what was that for?" Fin asked, annoyed.

Munch glared. "It wasn't you he was insulting," he complained. "I personally didn't find it that entertaining."

Cragen cleared his throat, effectively ending the conversation that was quickly turning into an argument. When the detectives looked at him, he asked, "Where are we on leads?"

Munch and Fin looked at each other. "Still working on it," Fin replied. "Everything we've got so far has turned into dead ends."

Cragen nodded. "Keep working on it."

With that, he headed out the door, following Elliot and hoping that he might be able to get him to pull back on the aggressiveness, at least a little bit.

**XXX**

He was on the roof, as Cragen knew he would be. Arms resting on the railing, leaning out over the edge, he was looking at the absolutely gorgeous view of New York City.

Elliot heard someone come up behind him, but he didn't turn to look.

"Beautiful view, isn't it?" Cragen settled next to Elliot on the railing, also taking in the scenery.

Elliot didn't answer. Cragen ripped his eyes off of the view and turned to face his detective. "Elliot, we all miss her," he said gently.

Elliot sighed and looked down at his hands. "I know," he whispered back.

Cragen's eyes narrowed at the emotion in his voice, his dismay at having to work without his partner by his side. Something had definitely changed. He cleared his throat. "Elliot?" He paused, but Elliot didn't look at him. He tried again. "Elliot?" Finally the detective's eyes flickered up. "Are you and Olivia…" he trailed off, then tried again. "Have you and Olivia…?" He just couldn't get the words out.

But Elliot knew what he was trying to ask. His gaze lowered again. "I don't know," he said quietly.

Cragen nodded. It seemed like an honest answer. "Just know that, if you do…" Again he couldn't complete the sentence.

And again, Elliot seemed to know what he was trying to say. He nodded back. "I know," he responded.

Cragen sighed. Elliot and Olivia were his two best and his two favorite detectives. But did they have to make everything so difficult? The entire NYPD either thought that they had hooked up or would hook up. But not one of those officers thought about the position that it would put him, their captain, in, when it happened. He reached out to rest a hand on Elliot's shoulder, and squeezed reassuringly. "Take a few minutes, then come back down," he told the detective.

Elliot nodded, and Cragen left him alone, heading back downstairs.

Elliot sighed and levered himself off of the banister, looking around at the empty air around him. This was where he and Olivia came to talk, or unwind, when a case, or life, became too much. This place had a lot of Olivia in it. He smiled, remembering, before following his captain back down to the squad room, much calmer.

* * *

Alex and Casey sat down in the crowded diner and looked around.

"Why is it that every time we come here it's impossible to move?" Casey whined as she picked up the menu and perused the options.

Alex, also looking at the menu, replied, "Because it's one of New York's best restaurants."

Casey sighed exasperatedly. "Yeah, the floor is dirty, the food is horrible, the waiters are rude…I can see what you mean by 'best restaurant'!" she retorted.

Alex looked up at her friend. "True New York restaurant, Casey, it represents the city." Casey shrugged, deflating, and Alex continued, "We can go somewhere else if you want…"

"No, that's OK," Casey interrupted quickly.

Alex smiled. This place really was a dingy little diner; there were many places that had better food and nicer staff, as well as better hygiene, but this small hole-in-the-wall of a restaurant had a certain quality about it. It just existed, without trying to please anybody. She had grown rather fond of the place, having frequented it quite often because of its closeness to the courthouse, and she knew that Casey, whine and complain about it though she might, was attached as well.

After the waitress took their orders, Casey leaned her arms on the table and looked at Alex intently. "So what's next for you?" she asked. The woman was back in the city, Africa was in the past; it was a logical question.

Alex looked at her friend and shrugged. "I talked to Jack, to see if there were any openings. He told me to give him a couple of days." She paused briefly, before continuing. "I think Jo's been talking to him about transferring, so I might be able to get back with SVU." She smiled nostalgically. "I can't believe how much I missed all of them while I was gone." As Alex finished, she noticed the look on Casey's face. Hurt and longing. "What about you?" she asked.

Casey met Alex's eyes, and then looked down. Rather than answer, she began to tell a story. "I got off to a pretty rocky start with SVU." She started fiddling with her paper napkin, slowly shredding it into confetti. "After my first case wrapped, I went to Jack and requested a transfer. I told him I didn't _want_ it. He looked at me and said, 'you will'." Casey looked up at her friend and smirked. "He was right. All I want to do right now is go back." She absentmindedly began to gather the shredded remains of her napkin, making a small, neat pile next to the ketchup bottle. "I have a meeting with the Bar Association tomorrow. I want to get reinstated."

Alex smiled. "That's great, Casey. Good luck."

Casey returned the smile, a little more forced. "Thanks, I'll need it," she replied, just as the waitress returned with their crappy, hole-in-the-wall diner food.

_I know it's short, but I have some ideas that I really want to get to, but I don't want to just add them on to this chapter, I think they deserve their own chapter, so I'm ending here, in the hopes that I can get to work on the next segment, and make it worth it!_

_And next…Olivia has taken a huge leap forward, but now that things are looking positive, will she take a step back? What's going on with Fin and Melinda? If you want to find out….REVIEW!_


	26. Chapter 26

**Disclaimer: they're not mine, I just play with them.**

When Elliot entered Olivia's apartment that night, he was expecting her to be asleep in her room. However, as he looked in and was met by nothing other than an unmade bed, his brow furrowed in confusion. He turned around and headed back down the hall, stopping when he found her on the couch, legs curled up underneath her, one arm resting beneath her head and the other draped across her stomach, as if she was subconsciously protecting it.

Elliot smiled at the sight. He quietly moved forward until he was leaning against the back of the couch. He carefully leaned down and brushed a soft kiss across her cheek. Olivia stirred, but didn't wake. Silently, he moved around to sit on the end of the couch by Olivia's feet, careful not to jostle her. He picked up the remote and turned on the TV, lowering the volume and setting it to a sports channel. He settled down to watch, glancing over at the woman laying next to him every few minutes, nothing but love in his eyes.

Olivia woke slowly, the sports announcer from ESPN finding its way through the fog of sleep to draw her out of the comfortable abyss. Groaning softly, she lifted her head slightly, noticing the football game playing on the television. A larger part of her brain, however, was focused on the man sitting on the end of her couch, watching the game. She groaned again, closing her eyes, hoping that he hadn't noticed. Olivia had had a lot of time to think while she was alone in her apartment all day, and as much as she hated herself for it, she was having some doubts. Elliot had always been there for her, but she was Olivia Benson; she just didn't _do_ stable. She didn't _do_ trust. She wanted Elliot, badly, but she didn't have enough confidence in herself to make a relationship work, and she didn't want to lose her best friend just because, in a moment of weakness, she gave in to her desires.

Unfortunately, Elliot heard her. "Morning, sunshine," he said cheerfully, still looking at the television.

Olivia didn't answer. She didn't know what to say, or how to tell him what was on her mind. She opened her eyes again and focused on the television, deliberately avoiding looking over at her partner.

Elliot waited for a response. When he didn't get one, he turned to look at Olivia. She was staring at the TV, but it didn't look like she was really watching the game. There was a small frown on her face, and her eyebrow was scrunched up, which told him she was thinking way too hard about something to just be watching television. There was something on her mind, and judging from her expression, Elliot knew it had to be big. "Liv?" Still no answer. "Olivia?" She grunted, proving that she had heard him. Elliot reached out and rested a hand on her leg, noticing her flinch under his touch. He started to get worried. "Liv, what's wrong?"

Olivia felt his hand squeeze reassuringly. She couldn't do this anymore. She couldn't be close to him or her resolve would waver. She slowly got up, careful not to move too quickly. Without looking at Elliot, she turned and headed towards her bedroom.

Elliot was confused. What had he done wrong? "Liv?" he called after her again.

Olivia stopped and balled her hands into fists, swallowing hard. She couldn't deny him when he sounded like that; hurt, like a wounded puppy. She had to give him some excuse. "I'm fine, Elliot." She tried to keep her voice even, so that he wouldn't hear the fearful tremor.

But Elliot, being Elliot, knew her better than that. He walked quickly to join her, stopping her in her tracks as he turned her around to face him. "Olivia, look at me." It wasn't a question, it was a request. One Olivia could not grant. She focused on his chest, trying desperately to rein the tears in, keep them from falling. "Olivia?" Elliot gently grasped her chin and raised her head so that she couldn't avoid his gaze anymore. He gasped at the sight of the tears. "Liv, what's wrong?" he tried again.

Olivia shifted her gaze over. She couldn't do this if she had to look at his baby blue eyes. And he saw her way too clearly when he looked into her chocolate brown orbs. "I can't do this, Elliot," she replied softly.

Elliot felt his heart break. "What do you mean," he winced as his voice cracked.

Olivia pulled her chin out of his grasp. "What are we doing, El?" she asked, slightly harshly. "What about our jobs? What about our friendship?" Elliot just stared at her. Olivia was working her way up to a rant by now. "What happens if we try this and it doesn't work out? Our friendship would be ruined, our partnership would be ruined. I can't take that risk, Elliot." She stopped to breathe, still avoiding his gaze. She couldn't take the hurt she knew she would see in his eyes. "You are the most important thing in my life. I can't lose you." Her voice dropped to a whisper by the end. She folded her arms across her chest, and tried desperately to stop the tears from flowing.

Elliot stared at her. She didn't want to give this a shot simply because it _might_ not work? He had to convince her to change her mind. "Olivia," he begged. "You can't just give this up because of what might happen." Internally he was cursing himself. He knew her fear of commitment, but he had hoped that the fact that it was him she was getting involved with would count for something. "If you're always looking for reasons not to be with somebody, then you're always going to find them." He saw the doubt in her eyes, but he didn't see her resolve wavering anytime soon. Trying one last time, he pleaded, "Please Liv. You need to have-"

Before he could finish that sentence, Olivia cut him off. "Have faith, I know Elliot," she said exasperatedly. "You're always saying that. Twelve _years_, I've heard you say that." She finally looked him in the eye. "But I'm not you, El," she glared. "You know what my life has been like, Elliot; I'm not religious, I don't believe in things like fate or faith or anything like that."

Her eyes were glinting now. Little gold flecks were invading the brown, and Elliot irrelevantly marveled at how beautiful they were, and wondered if he could make them glitter like that without being afraid that she would bite his head off.

Deciding he needed to stop her before she built up to a full rant and quite possibly hurt herself, or him, he raised his hands to cup her face, effectively shutting her up. "I know, Liv, I'm always telling you to have faith. But Olivia," he leaned down and continued, "Faith is believing when there's nothing left to believe in." He closed the distance between them, kissing her gently. Pulling back, he continued, "Believe in me." He leaned down for another kiss. "Believe in us." One more kiss, and then he took her hands in his and raised them up so that they were resting on his chest. "Because this," he made sure she could feel his heartbeat, "has always been yours, and _will_ always be yours."

Olivia was stunned into silence. Part of her wanted to be mad at him for taking every little reason she had for not wanting to get into a relationship, and making them all disappear. But she knew he was right. It all came down to whether or not she could believe in him. Did she trust him? Olivia clamped down on that part of her brain right away. She trusted Elliot with her life. He was the one person she knew would never leave her. Could she believe in _them_? The two of them? Together? They made a kick-ass team, there was no doubting that. But that was all the job. What about in life? Olivia had to admit, she believed it was possible.

Elliot watched her think, worrying the entire time. He wasn't one for mushy speeches, god knows he had never said anything like that to Kathy, but he needed Olivia; it was a deep seeded craving that manifested on a level he had never reached with his ex-wife. He needed her to believe in him, and to give this a shot, because now that he had gotten a taste of what it could be like, he needed the whole thing. He was rewarded a few minutes later when he saw the evil smirk spread across his partner's face. Not entirely certain what it meant, but positive that any kind of smile was good, he tentatively grinned back.

Olivia stood on her tiptoes, yanking her hands out of his grasp and reaching up to clasp them behind his neck, and pulled him down to her level. Their lips crashed down on each other, in a heart wrenching, fireworks display, chorus singing in the background, kiss.

When they finally broke apart, Elliot rested his forehead against Olivia's, trying to catch his breath.

Olivia chuckled wryly. "Damn you," she whispered through her own ragged breathing. Elliot pulled back slightly, confused. Olivia saw the worry in his expression, and she reached up to run a hand down his cheek softly. "You take away every reason I have for leaving, and you make me realize I don't want to run any more. I was happy before you came along." She saw his eyes narrow, the smirk starting to stretch across her face. She amended, "OK, maybe not happy, but I was content." The smirk widened, and she glared at him playfully. "OK, so I was miserable, but at least I was blissfully ignorant of how unhappy I was! And then you came along, and made me realize just how empty my life was."

Elliot reached his hand up to grasp hers. He brought it to his lips and kissed it gently, whispering as he did so, "I live to serve."

Olivia smiled. Still entangled in each other, they made their way back to the couch. Elliot pulled Olivia down gently next to him. She rested her head on his shoulder, and he put his arm around her, drawing her closer. Olivia closed her eyes contentedly. She could definitely get used to this.

But there was one more thing she needed to do. "El?" she whispered into his shirt.

Elliot began to stroke her arm, noticing the goose bumps that he raised with each pass. "Hmm?" he let her know he was listening.

Olivia swallowed. This shouldn't be that hard, and she was certain he would say yes, but she needed to let him know. "You know I've never really done this before." Her hand subconsciously grasped his shirt, as if to keep him next to her, to make sure he wouldn't leave. "I just don't _do_ serious relationships, so do me a favor?"

Elliot pulled back to look at her directly. "What?" he asked. He wasn't nervous, she had already overcome the big hurtle, and was willing to give this a try. But he was a little apprehensive, hearing her speak now.

Olivia smirked again, locking eyes with her boyfriend. "If you ever see me about to run, or if you think I'm about to run, stop me."

Elliot laughed and leaned forward. "Deal," he replied, just before he took her lips in another heart wrenching kiss.

* * *

Fin came to a stop outside of apartment 5C and stopped. He took a deep breath to steady himself, and felt a reassuring hand on his shoulder. He turned around to face Melinda. She smiled. "Are you sure you're ready for this?" she asked gently.

Fin swallowed and nodded firmly. "I know it's stupid," he replied. "Ken's grown up, it's not like I need his permission." He saw Melinda nodding along, smiling. "But he's my son, and I want him to meet you, officially."

Melinda leaned forward and kissed him quickly. "I can't wait," she said, smirking.

Fin turned back to face the door and took another deep breath before knocking. They heard some rustling around before the door opened to reveal Ken standing there, blocking the entrance.

"Dad?" Ken was surprised to see his father standing at his door. He was surprised to see a woman with his father, though he thought he recognized this woman from his father's work. "What are you doing here?'

Fin tried to smile, though he suspected it came out as more of a grimace. "Hey Ken, how are you doing?" It sounded phony, even to him.

Ken rolled his eyes. "Fine, dad," he replied exasperatedly, and repeated, "What are you doing here? I'm busy."

Fin glanced at Melinda, who nodded encouragingly. He turned back to his son. "Do you mind if we come in?" he asked. "I'd like to talk to you."

Ken looked behind him, a worried expression on his face. Finally he turned back to his unexpected guests. "Fine," he sighed, backing up to let them in.

Fin and Melinda followed Ken to the living room, where they were met by a tall Caucasian man in his late twenties.

"Hey, Ken, what's going on?" the man asked, getting up from his previous position on the couch.

"It's nothing Paul," Ken replied, gesturing for the man to sit back down. He turned back to Fin and made the introductions. "Dad, this is Paul, Paul, my father, Fin." He turned to Melinda, and apologetic look on his face. "I'm sorry, I don't quite remember-"

Melinda cut him off, holding out her hand to shake. "Melinda Warner," she said, smiling. "I don't think we've ever been properly introduced."

Ken took the offered hand, returning the smile. "Yeah," he replied, remembering now where he knew her. "You're the medical examiner, right?"

Melinda nodded, and moved forward to shake Paul's hand after Fin. The two of them then watched Ken take a seat next to his friend, while they stood awkwardly in front of them.

Ken nodded towards the chairs. "You can sit down," he offered.

Fin and Melinda found seats, and the four sat in uncomfortable silence for a few minutes, before Fin broke it. "So, you and Paul…" he started, before trailing off.

Ken knew where he was going, and he nodded. "Paul is my boyfriend," he informed his father.

Fin looked even more uncomfortable, but he knew he had screwed up enough where his son was concerned, and he needed to be happy for him. For them. "Congratulations," he said.

The two young men nodded their thanks.

"So, dad, what are you doing here?" Ken asked for the third time.

Fin looked momentarily panicked, before he looked over at Melinda and his expression evened out. She was right. He needed to tell his son how much he meant, and how proud of him he was. Fin looked back at the couch. This was going to be a very awkward conversation in front of people, but that didn't matter if it meant that he could lay another brick in mending the bridge. "Ken, I know I haven't been there for you like a father should, and I know that all of that is on me," he started, smiling wryly as he saw the 'no duh' expression on his son's face. "But no matter what you think, I love you and I want you to be happy." He saw the expression change to surprise and shock. "I came here today, because your opinion and your feelings matter to me." He reached out and took Melinda's hand, grasping tightly. "I wanted to formally introduce you to my girlfriend, Melinda."

Ken was still staring. He had barely heard past 'I love you and I want you to be happy' to hear the rest of it. But as he saw them holding hands, he got it. He couldn't believe his father was sitting in his living room, saying all of the things he had longed for as a child. True, they had had a better relationship ever since they had reconnected a few years ago, but it wasn't the typical father-son relationship. It wasn't one filled with love or compassion. Neither one of them was the sappy 'I love you' kind of person, but what Ken had refused to admit to anyone was that, in all of the years since they had reconnected, he just longed for his father to tell him that he was proud. To tell him he loved him. And here, in this living room, he was hearing the words, finally.

Ken realized that everyone was staring at him, waiting. He shook his head to clear it. "Congratulations dad, Melinda," he said, getting up to close the distance before he realized that he didn't know what was appropriate here. A hug? A handshake? Fin stood up too, offering his hand to his son, who took it gladly. Melinda stood up, unsure. She hovered in the background for a moment, before Ken transferred his attention over to her. As Fin watched, Ken lightly encircled Melinda in a friendly hug, which she returned wholeheartedly. Fin smiled, watching them.

As they all settled down, Ken returned to his position next to Paul, and Fin and Melinda to their seats, Ken asked, "So how long have you two been seeing each other?"

The detective and ME looked at each other. "A couple of weeks," Melinda replied.

Fin tore his gaze from his girlfriend and looked at his son. "And you and Paul?" he asked curiously.

Ken stiffened momentarily, until he realized that his father was genuinely curious. He wanted to know, and he wasn't disgusted or outraged or upset. He and Paul clasped hands, smiling at each other.

"Almost a year," Paul replied giddily.

Fin and Melinda looked at each other and smiled. They clearly were in love. Fin cleared his throat, and the happy couple turned their attention back to him. "Mel and I were going to get dinner, and we were wondering if you would like to join us."

Ken and Paul glanced at each other. Paul nodded, and Ken turned back to his father. "Sure, dad," he answered. He wasn't sure what was happening, but he liked it. His father was really trying. He had to, too. "We'll just go get our coats."

As Fin nodded, Ken and Paul left the room, and Melinda turned to look at him. "That went really well," she smiled impishly.

Fin agreed, "Yeah. I think we're going to be OK."

They stood up and clasped hands, moving to wait by the door. When the two men returned, the four of them walked out of the apartment together.

_Next-how does dinner go? Are Elliot and Olivia finally (I would italicize that, but it already is, haha) on the right track? What happened with Casey's meeting? Does she get reinstated?_

_So this chapter had some nice little fluff. What'd you guys think? Please, please, PLEASE review! =]_


	27. Chapter 27

**Sorry for the long delay, I wish I had an excuse, but I really don't. well, I was busy for a while, but then I was just distracted. Anyway, here you go!**

**Disclaimer: not mine =[**

"So, how's Olivia?" Ken asked, setting his menu down and looking at his father.

Fin looked up to meet his son's gaze. He was momentarily confused as to how Ken knew about Olivia's injury, and it showed in his gaze.

Ken smiled at the confusion. "It was all over the news, dad," he told the detective. He looked over at Paul, who was wearing a similar bemused expression on his face. Speaking now to his boyfriend, he clarified, "One of the detectives who works with my father. You read that article about the injured cop, right?"

Paul's expression cleared and he nodded. "I didn't know she was that close to you," he said.

Ken nodded, without speaking. He liked Olivia, a lot. She had been the one who had kicked him in the ass and made him realize that he wanted to reconnect with his father. She had been the one to break the news when Fin had been shot; and when he had gotten into that trouble while searching for a dead body- _that was a nightmare none of them needed to remember_- it had been Olivia, not Fin, whom he had called for help. She had always been there, just supporting him, without making him feel like an idiot or a jerk for not being on the best of terms with his father. He got the impression that she was just that kind of person; and he felt like she supported him that way because she knew what it was like to feel that kind of animosity towards a parent. Though the look he had seen in her eyes when he had talked about his falling out with the old man made him believe that her enmity ran much deeper, much _harder_, than his.

He looked back at his father. "I sent her a get well card," he continued. "How's she doing?"

Fin smiled at his son's thoughtfulness. He noticed that Ken seemed to really like Olivia. He had been hurt and offended when his son had called her over his own father, but he was happy that the young man had formed a friendship with his colleague. "She's doing fine," he replied.

"Has she been released from the hospital?" Ken asked.

Fin nodded. "About a week ago," he answered. "She'll probably be back at work in another week." He noticed Melinda shaking her head, and turned towards her. "You don't think so?" he questioned, raising his eyebrows.

Melinda stopped shaking her head and looked at her boyfriend. She smiled and clarified, "Oh, I _know_ she'll be back at the precinct begging Cragen to let her work as soon as she can walk from her bedroom to her living room without feeling like she's just run a marathon, but physically it's going to take much longer."

They all had to smile at that. And then Paul decided to take the conversation a step further, not realizing the tenderness of the subject. "So what really happened that day? The stories in the newspaper and on television were very vague." Silence greeted his query, and he looked properly abashed. "I'm sorry," he rushed, "I didn't mean to-"

"Don't worry about it," Fin cut him off. "It was just a bad case that got worse."

Melinda chimed in, grasping Fin's hand reassuringly. "We all made mistakes that day, and unfortunately it was Olivia who paid for them."

A silent exchange between Ken and Paul effectively ended the discussion on the topic. Clearly it was a touchy subject, that neither the detective nor the ME wanted to talk about. Looking at the pair now, Ken realized it was probably guilt that made them reluctant to discuss the incident.

With a forced air of casualness, the four turned their conversation to much lighter and friendlier topics throughout dinner. When the evening ended, everyone was happy. Ken even hugged his father before the two pairs headed in different directions outside the restaurant.

Melinda had never seen Fin look happier.

* * *

"Dickie!"

Elliot looked up from his place by the stove to watch his oldest son streak by in a blur, followed by his youngest daughter. He sighed and shook his head, glancing over to the living room, expecting to share an exasperated look with his girlfriend/partner. The picture he saw there took his breath away. Olivia was keeping Eli occupied while he cooked dinner; she had him sitting on her lap, secured by her arms, with the TV on in the background. The look on her face was pure joy and love, as she spent more time watching the toddler than the television. He had always known she'd make a great mother. And he was incredibly grateful to her for allowing him to entertain his children at her apartment, since it was his week. The custody arrangements had finally been sorted out, and he had Kathy had agreed to have a joint custody agreement for their still underage children. Maureen and Kathleen had decided to join their younger siblings and father for dinner. Both of them were anxious to see Olivia again, away from the depressing hospital air.

"Da-ad!"

Elliot was brought out of his musings by Lizzie's scream. He looked around to locate his daughter, but before he could say anything to try and sort out World War- well, let's call it 57- between his children, he saw Olivia reach out behind her ever so innocently and grab Dickie's arm just as he ran behind the couch. Her gaze didn't waver from the toddler in her lap. Dickie stopped running immediately.

"Dickie, give your sister her book back," Olivia chastised in a quiet, yet firm, voice.

The boy immediately complied. Elliot watched in amazement as his children quieted down and returned to their previous positions around the living room. His smile got bigger as he saw Lizzie settle down on Olivia's left side, opening up her book to where she had been before the brotherly interruption, curling her feet under her as she subconsciously leaned into the woman, and Olivia reached an arm out to wrap it around the girl. Dickie sat down on Olivia's other side, relaxing into the comfortable couch. Maureen smiled as she settled back to her position on the floor, leaning against Olivia's legs, while Kathleen just shook her head at her younger siblings from her spot on the love seat.

Olivia caught Elliot's gaze and held it, smiling back. While the children were otherwise occupied, the two adults shared an entire conversation in a single glance.

When Olivia flicked her eyes over his shoulder, Elliot realized that he was boiling over. With an eye-roll, he turned back to the stove to finish dinner.

Ten minutes later, Elliot called in to announce that dinner was ready.

With quiet groans, the kids all stood up and stretched. Olivia looked down at the child in her lap and contemplated. She wasn't all together certain she had enough strength to lift the kid yet, and was trying to figure out how she could ask someone to help without sounding needy. This whole admitting she didn't need to be so strong all the time was harder than it seemed.

Luckily Maureen caught the glance. Being a smart girl, she could figure out what the problem was. "Hey Liv, why don't I take Eli and get him settled?" she offered, holding out her hands.

Olivia smiled gratefully at her partner's oldest child. "Thanks, Maureen," she replied, attempting to hand the toddler off.

Of course Eli, being a Stabler, protested just to be contrary. "No, no, no!" he wailed, sensing the shift of adult. "Want Livvy!"

Maureen reached down and gently pried him off of Olivia, whom he was holding on to with a firm grip. "Come on, Eli," she chided gently. "Let's get you set up for dinner."

Eli just kept crying. "No!" he screamed, reaching back towards Olivia, who was trying to lever herself off of the couch, without much success.

She looked up at the wailing toddler, and something in her heart cracked. She smiled at him. "Hey kiddo, I'm coming with you," she tried to sooth him. "How about I sit next to you, OK?"

Eli's cries slowed down and he hiccuped.

Olivia gently ruffled his hair. "That's better," she praised.

She watched as Maureen took her brother to the table, then turned her attention back to her immediate problem. She still couldn't lever herself off of the couch, and she really didn't want to have to ask for help. A small, well manicured hand intruded on her vision, and she raised her eyes to see Kathleen standing in front of her, a smile on her face.

"Need a hand?" the blond asked innocently.

Olivia stared at the limb for a moment before taking it with a smirk. "Thanks, Katie," she said with a groan as she finally managed to get herself into a standing position.

The two women shared a moment before heading to the table to join the rest of the family. As promised, Olivia took a seat next to Eli, smiling as he reached out towards his 'Aunty Livvy'. The smile turned into a grin with a gleam in her eye as she followed Elliot's movements; putting dinner on the table and then taking a seat on her other side. He saw her gaze and matched it, not caring if his children were watching. They had waited too long, and he loved her too much to worry about what other people would think.

The four older children watched as their father communicated silently with his partner. They smiled knowingly at each other and hoped that that look meant what they thought it did.

* * *

Casey walked into the squad room and looked around. Munch was at his desk, Alex leaning against it. The two seemed to be deep in conversation about something important. All of the other desks were vacant, and the door to the captain's office was closed, but she could see Cragen working through the window.

Alex looked up and nodded at Casey with a smile. Munch noticed the ADA's wavering attention and turned to see what had captured her interest. He motioned for Casey to come join them, and she did so, taking Fin's empty seat.

"What are you both doing here so late?" she asked curiously as she sat.

Munch shuffled some papers on his desk. "Talking evidence," he grimaced.

Casey nodded. "And everyone else?" She gestured towards the desk she was currently occupying, indicating the sergeant's absent partner.

Munch shrugged. "Elliot's with Olivia, Fin left a while ago, but we need him to clear a few things up here, so I called him to come back in. He should be here soon." He nodded to the back of the squad room. "Captain's in his office."

Alex had turned to focus on her friend, and now she spoke up, curious. "How'd the review go?" she asked anxiously.

Casey looked at the ADA for a moment, feeling the tension build up. Finally she smiled. "Much better than it could have," she said ruefully. "I'm on probation. They're letting me work SVU cases under supervision, and they'll review again in six months, at which point I'll either get taken off probation, or they'll permanently disbar me."

Alex returned Casey's smile. "That's great, Case," she congratulated.

Munch nodded. "Welcome back," he added.

Casey couldn't keep the smile from widening. It felt good to be back. She got up from the desk and drifted towards the window, leaning up against the wall as she looked down at the street, watching the people who passed by the doors to the precinct. People-gazing now, she noticed something that made her grin turn suddenly crafty. Her eyes twinkled mischievously. Speaking over her shoulder, she called, "Fin's here." She paused for a moment, then added, "I think you guys should see this."

Catching the playfulness in her voice, Alex and Munch immediately rose to join their old -and now new- colleague at the window.

"What are we looking at?" Alex asked curiously.

"Look down and to the left a bit, right next to the precinct doors," Casey directed.

The ADA and sergeant obeyed, and, seeing what Casey was watching so intently, they couldn't help but laugh.

"It's about damn time," Munch commented, watching his oblivious partner in a lip lock with the ME.

Unnoticed, Cragen had come up to join them, standing silently on Casey's right side. He opened his mouth to ask what they were looking at it, when he spotted his detective and Melinda, caught up in their passionate kiss. He cleared his throat instead, noticing with satisfaction that they all jumped as they were made aware of his presence. "I believe this is called spying," he commented dryly.

They all looked properly ashamed, hurrying back to the desks and attempted to look busy. Casey, not sure what to do, leaned on Elliot's desk, facing Alex and Munch. Cragen turned his attention to her. "What are you doing here?" he asked curiously, just as Fin walked through the doors acting completely normal, and sat at his desk, oblivious to the looks his partner and the ADA were shooting him.

Casey smiled. "I got my license back," she replied. "Probation for six months, then a follow up review, but the point is, I'm back." She accepted Cragen and Fin's congratulations with a nod, continuing, "So, do you have anything for me to do?"

Alex looked at her friend. "We could use some help with this case," she invited.

Casey walked over to join the group, feeling at home for the first time in two years. _This is what life is suppose to be like_, she thought as she watched her friends work.

_I hope this was nice and fluffy, but not too cutesy. And some people might have problems with the whole shared custody thing, but it happens. When my parents got divorced, they had joint custody of me and my sister. Kathy and Elliot are both great parents, and still remain friends._

_REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! Please?_


	28. Chapter 28

**Sorry it's been such a long wait =[ I wish I had a real excuse, I've been busy with my internship, plus I just got into **_**Bones**_**, so I've been watching that nonstop. But here it is, the next chapter. Enjoy! **

**Disclaimer: if you recognize it, it's not mine!**

Olivia stopped outside the doors of the 16th precinct and took a breath, contemplative. She was going crazy in her apartment, and she no longer felt like she was being stabbed every time she walked, so she had decided to do something about the madness. After her doctor's appointment, rather than take a cab home, she decided to visit her friends.

Looking at the doors now, she smiled. She missed this place.

Olivia walked inside, noticing eyes turn towards her immediately, and whispering break out as she passed.

Desk Sergeant Paul Wilkens looked up from his computer and noticed Olivia walking through the lobby. "Detective Benson!" he called out jovially. Olivia heard the call and walked towards the sergeant. "What are you doing here?" Wilkens continued curiously. He was positive that she wasn't supposed to be back for several more weeks.

Olivia smiled. While she could do without all of the stares she was receiving right now, she loved being a part of the 'brothers and sisters in blue' family. Whatever else could be said about the NYPD, no one could deny that they _were_ a family.

"Just visiting," she replied.

Wilkens nodded. He could guess that she missed her coworkers. He had transferred from the 2-7 six months earlier, and he had noticed immediately how much closer this precinct was knit. They weren't just police-family. They _were_ family. Brothers and sisters almost in the literal sense. Blood and DNA didn't matter to them. It both comforted and unsettled him. But then, he figured, these detectives, seeing the worst horrors that humanity had to offer on a daily basis, they probably needed to band together to survive it, to not lose their minds. "How are you feeling?" he asked, genuinely worried. He remembered seeing her as the paramedics wheeled her out. She hadn't looked good. He really liked the woman; she was passionate and caring, a kick-ass detective, incredibly good at her job.

Olivia smiled reassurances. "I'm fine, Wilkens," she said. She didn't miss the raised eyebrow, and sighed. "Seriously, Paul, I'm fine!" She was getting tired of people asking her that, and then not believing the answer.

With another sigh and a shake of her head, she said goodbye to the desk sergeant and headed towards the elevator, trying her hardest to ignore the stares and whispers around her.

It was the most awkward elevator ride of her life. When she got on, everyone stopped what they were doing to look at her. Olivia pressed the button for the fourth floor and remained staring at the buttons, trying to tune out the crowd. When several officers offered her their sympathies and commented on her impressive recovery, she smiled and nodded her thanks.

It was a relief when the elevator doors opened on the fourth floor. Olivia beat a hasty retreat, exiting the confined space and heading in the direction of the squad room, again noticing and trying to ignore the stares that everyone in the hallway seemed to be giving her.

Elliot was the first to notice when Olivia walked in. He looked up immediately, as if sensing her presence, and broke out into a huge grin. It was like a dream to see her standing in this room again.

Fin, noticing Elliot's wavering attention, followed his gaze and a smile of his own adorned his face. He got up from his desk to greet her at the entrance. "What are you doing here?" he asked, giving Olivia a light hug, still mindful of her injury.

Olivia returned the hug just as carefully. She was starting to feel the day in her abdomen now; all of the walking and standing was taking its toll, but she didn't want anyone to know. She moved from Fin to Elliot, who had joined the two by the doors. The hug she gave him was a little stronger. Pulling back, she replied dryly, "I was going crazy in my apartment."

Fin and Elliot both chuckled at the absolute seriousness in her voice. Then Fin's desk phone rang and he moved away to answer it. Elliot took this opportunity to study Olivia. She was trying to be light and casual, but he could see the strain under her mask. "Are you sure you should be doing so much right now?" he asked cautiously. Approaching the subject the wrong way was a good way to get a body part bitten off. Most likely his head.

Olivia glared at him for a moment, then deflated. She should have known better than to think she could try and hide anything from her partner. Her gaze softened and she sighed. "I'm just a little tired," she said softly.

Elliot smiled at her honesty and gestured for her to take a seat at her vacant desk. He walked with her and returned to his seat in the chair across from hers. Looking at his partner now, he couldn't help but think about how good it felt to see the chair occupied again, even just for a little while.

Olivia caught him watching her and felt a grin tug at her lips. The two stared at each other, completely oblivious to the rest of the room. All of the officers present had been watching Olivia since the moment she walked in, and were now studying the pair with interest. This was just more fuel on the fire of gossip.

Cragen walked out of his office to find everyone watching his two best detectives rather than working. Cragen thought maybe he had missed something-wait. _Two best detectives,_ Cragen realized with a start. "Olivia, what are you doing here?" Cragen asked, moving forward to stand by her desk.

Olivia tore her eyes away from her boyfriend- she still couldn't believe that after all this time, she could finally call him that- and looked up at the captain, leaning back in her chair. "Don't worry, Cap," she grinned ruefully. "I know better than to ask to come back just yet." Elliot and Fin laughed, and even Cragen had to grin. "I'm just visiting."

Cragen nodded and rested a hand on her shoulder. "As soon as the doctor gives you the OK, I'll welcome you with open arms."

"And when do we think that will be?"

They all looked up for the speaker, focusing on Munch as he walked in, followed by Alex and Casey, who grinned and nodded at Olivia, stopping in the center of the bullpen, in between the detectives' desks.

Olivia smiled back. "As soon as possible," she replied. She glanced over at Elliot, then continued, "I'll be fine in a few days."

Everyone's attention shifted over to her partner, who was shaking his head violently at that statement.

Olivia raised her eyebrow. "No?" she questioned.

Elliot stopped moving his head, suddenly cautious. "I just don't want you to hurry back and hurt yourself," he said carefully.

Olivia tried to clamp down on the annoyance bubbling up inside her. She knew he was just worried. Forcing a hard smile out, she replied, "I can take care of myself."

Elliot swallowed. He could tell she was irritated with him. "I just-" he started quietly, but Olivia interrupted him.

"Trust me, El, I know my limits," she stated quietly, the anger dissipating. She knew he only cared about her, and didn't want her to get hurt again. It was just tough to finally let someone in, after being the only one she could count on for her entire life. But she had made a promise, a vow, to make this relationship work. And she wanted it to work. She loved Elliot, and would let him in, past the walls and boundaries she had constructed that kept everyone else out; because she knew that she could give him her heart and he would protect it with his life.

Elliot saw the acquiescence in her eyes and smiled. He knew letting someone in was difficult for her, and he appreciated how hard she was trying.

Cragen, watching the detectives along with everyone else, cleared his throat to get their attention. When they all re-focused on him, he asked, "Where are we with the Robertson trial?"

Casey and Alex, now being addressed about the case that had brought them to SVU that day, spoke up.

"I don't think we have anything to worry about," Alex assured the captain. She gestured to Casey with her head. "We're just here to double check everything, make sure there are no surprises."

Cragen nodded, and looked around the room. "Do we have anything else?" he asked the room at large.

When they all shook their heads, he nodded again, satisfied. Alex and Casey took up resting positions, leaning against Elliot and Olivia's desks.

"So, what'd the doctor say?" Casey asked, leaning back to look around Alex at her friend.

Olivia noticed everyone else staring at her, and grimaced. She hated being the center of attention. She tried to put on a smile for the crowd, but didn't think it came out right. "Everything's fine," she replied, seeing the exasperated look her partner was giving her out of the corner of her eye.

Casey groaned. "Come on, Liv, you've got to stop saying you're fine all the time. You got shot, there's nothing _fine_ about that!"

Olivia sighed and shook her head. "Seriously guys, you're all making a big deal out of nothing. It's really no big-"

"Don't even finish that sentence, Olivia," Fin interrupted.

"Yeah, Liv," Elliot interjected quietly. Everyone looked at him, surprised by the emotion in his voice. But Elliot had eyes only for Olivia, who was watching him intently with an almost guilty expression on her face. "You were technically dead for four minutes; don't ask us to write that off as nothing."

He said 'us', but Olivia knew from the look in his eyes that he was telling her not to ask _him_ to write it off.

She leaned forward slightly, oblivious to the rest of the room. For Elliot and Olivia, there was just the two of them, two separate beings that existed in a place where the constraints of life did not apply. A place where they could be together, completely, without fear or trepidation. For Elliot there was only Olivia, she was the only other being that occupied the planet. She had been placed here just for him.

And for Olivia, she too saw only one. It was Elliot, and only Elliot; there was no one else, in the world or in her heart.

"El." Olivia's voice was placating, soothing, just above a whisper. "I survived."

The look the two shared was smoldering. Everyone watching shifted in their positions, uncomfortable, feeling very much like they were intruding on a private moment.

When Cragen cleared his throat awkwardly reality came crashing down. Olivia glanced away and Elliot picked up the nearest file and buried his head in it. Both felt rather embarrassed at sharing such an intense moment in front of their colleagues, boss, and friends.

All of whom were rather keen to forget what they had seen. As Cragen thought while he retreated to his office, _if they didn't address the issue, he could truthfully deny any knowledge of his detectives' actions, should someone ask the questions_.

**XXX**

When Jo walked into the squad room, she was surprised to see everyone clustered around Olivia's desk. Confused, she stepped forward, only to be brought up short when she saw the woman herself sitting there. Jo felt a moment of panic, realizing that she would be expected to say something to the detective.

No one had yet recognized her. She wondered if it would be possible to just slip back out. It wasn't like she was here in any official capacity. It was more like a 'bon voyage', a farewell visit.

But before she could beat a hasty retreat, Munch glanced around, and, seeing her hovering at the entrance, beckoned her forward welcomingly.

Jo swallowed hard, and took a tentative step to join the group.

Elliot, having eyes only for Olivia up until this point, noticed the arrival of his former partner. He looked up at her as she walked up to stand next to Alex and Casey. "What are you doing here?" he asked curiously.

Olivia followed Elliot's gaze and saw Jo. She managed a small smile at the ADA, and felt confused when the woman's returning smile seemed more like a grimace. _Why did she seem so nervous_ was the prominent thought on the detective's mind.

Jo only glanced at Olivia to gouge her reaction to the visit, before focusing on Elliot. He was an easier subject. She had already talked with him. He had said he didn't blame her. She knew where she stood with him. Well, she thought she did. She couldn't help but see an accusatory undertone in the gaze he was fixing on her. Or maybe she was just imagining it.

Remembering that he had asked her a question, a valid one, she opened her mouth and tried to speak. But her throat was too dry from nerves. Coughing, she tried again. "Just wanted to stop by to officially say good bye," she managed to get out.

Olivia raised an eyebrow at Elliot. He had told her that both Alex and Casey were back with SVU, but he hadn't mentioned Jo at all.

Elliot asked the question he knew was on Olivia's, and probably everyone else's, mind. "Where are you headed?"

Jo managed a hard smile. "Homicide," she replied. "I think it's better suited to me." She glanced at Olivia again, trying to get some sense of how the woman was feeling about her presence, and her departure. But Olivia was watching Elliot. She seemed more concerned with _his_ feelings on her presence. Following the detective's gaze, she saw relief on the face of her former partner. Elliot was glad that she was leaving. Jo tried not to get too offended. She knew it was for the best. She had never fit in with this group; none of them had really accepted her. They were much happier with Alex and Casey, the only two ADA's who really managed to become part of the SVU family.

Looking around at the crowd now, she finally realized that she would miss them. Not in a family type of way, but as a friend. She was sorry that she hadn't made more of an effort now. But before she left, there was one thing she needed to do. "Olivia?" She waited until the woman looked up at her. "Could I talk to you for a moment?" Another glance around. "Alone?"

Olivia looked from Jo to Elliot. She saw a vein throbbing in his neck as he clenched his hands. Whatever he had told Jo in that conversation, he couldn't deny that he was harboring some ill feelings for her part in Olivia's condition. He found it ironic that he hadn't even blamed her until she had put the idea in his head.

Olivia looked back at the ADA. "Sure," she replied, standing up rather stiffly, trying not to show any pain. She thought she may have overextended it today.

Jo tried not to catch anyone's eye as she looked for a private place to talk. She knew they all knew what she wanted to talk about, and she didn't want to see any accusations in their gazes. She gestured towards the lounge finally. "Upstairs?" she questioned, heading in that direction.

Olivia hesitated, not sure what to say. She didn't want to show weakness in front of her colleagues-even though she knew that they would understand-but there was no way she could handle stairs yet. Just walking up the four or five steps on her way into the precinct had been torture.

A furtive glance at Elliot, and he knew her predicament. He still thought she shouldn't worry so much about appearing strong, but he knew it was so ingrained into her personality by now that she didn't know how else to act. He appreciated that she was trying with him, but it would have been asking too much to ask her to do the same with so many others. "How about an interview room, Jo?" he called after her, stopping her from climbing the stairs.

Jo looked back, not sure what he was doing. But she decided to go with it; she didn't need to give him any more reason to hate him. She changed course and headed towards the empty room.

Olivia looked gratefully at her partner, and followed.

Munch and Fin looked at each other disdainfully. "Thank God," Fin said harshly.

"What do you mean?" Alex asked.

Fin looked at the ADA. "Thank God she's leaving," he reiterated.

Casey raised her eyebrows. "Why? It seemed like she was doing all right for a while."

Fin shook his head. "We were civil because she was Elliot's old partner, but she never fit in here," he stated.

Munch nodded. "Cold-hearted old fish," he grumbled.

Fin's head was shaking again. "Maybe it was just me," he started, moving back to sit at his desk again, "but when we finally got into the morgue that day, she seemed more upset that she had gotten blood on her two thousand dollar suit than with Liv bleeding out next to her."

"And later, she was more worried that we would all blame her for what had happened than with Olivia being in a coma," Munch agreed.

Alex and Casey looked at each other. They knew in that moment that they were both thinking the same thing: McCoy shouldn't even _try_ to replace them anymore. No one else would fit in with SVU, and it was useless to pretend otherwise. They couldn't help but be reminded of the partnership between Elliot and Olivia.

Neither ADA could keep the grin off her face.

**XXX**

Olivia closed the door behind her and took a seat at the table. Jo remained standing. Olivia knew what she wanted to talk about, but wasn't anxious to get started. She didn't blame the woman, not completely, but the weeks of being treated as a subordinate, an employee, having the ADA act as if her opinions didn't matter, were starting to catch up. And that day, she couldn't forget that she had wanted to wait a little bit, but Jo had insisted they press forward immediately. If they had waited even five minutes, Paul would have already left, and none of this would have happened.

Jo glanced at Olivia, trying to reassure herself. But she didn't see any acquittal in the detective's eyes. She didn't see anything in the woman's eyes. It was like she was wearing a mask, shielding her thoughts, her feelings, her emotions, locking them up where no one could see them. Where they couldn't be used as a weakness.

"Olivia…"

Still no response.

Jo tried again. "Olivia, I don't know what to-'

"Say?" Olivia cut in. Her eyes glinted. She was angry. "I'm sorry would be a good start."

Jo sighed. She hated apologies, but she respected this woman too much to risk her wrath. "I'm sorry," she said, almost a whisper.

Olivia nodded, with no change in her expression. "Good."

Jo looked confused. "But-"

Again, she was cut off. "I said, I'm sorry would be a good start. I didn't say I'd let you off the hook."

Jo frowned. She hadn't believed Olivia could be this cold. "So, you don't forgive me?" she asked cautiously. She wasn't afraid of the woman, but all the same, she didn't want to get on her bad side.

Olivia sighed, folding her arms across her chest. "I don't know, Jo," she said truthfully. She saw the ADA open her mouth to speak, and rushed on. It was time to finally confront the situation. "It's not really that I blame you for this," she shrugged. "It's the whole thing. All of it." Olivia stood up to leave. If Jo didn't realize what she was talking about, she was even more clueless than the detective had thought.

She had reached the door, one hand on the knob, when Jo called out, "What do you mean?"

And apparently, Olivia had given the woman too much credit. She turned the knob, gripping a little too tightly, trying to control her anger. She would not lash out. She was not Elliot.

"Olivia?"

To hell with it. Door partly open, Olivia turned back around to face Jo. "It's not just this," Olivia said tightly, trying to hold on to some semblance of dignity, as weeks of resentment and anger came bubbling to the surface. "It's you treating us like your subordinates, your errand dogs, your _assistants_." Some part of her brain noted her voice rising in volume, and out of the corner of her eye, she saw first Elliot-so in tune was he with his partner that he had caught onto her rise in stress level-then Fin, Munch, Casey, Alex, and Cragen-who had come back out of his office to converse with the rest-catch on to Elliot's shift in attention, and they, too, turned to watch the confrontation.

Olivia was still trying not to explode. She didn't want this to be overheard, and she felt slightly ashamed that she couldn't just bury all of this, but she was tired of being non-confrontational. She was tired of letting this woman walk all over her, and she was tired of saying nothing. "It's the fact that you tell us what to do, and don't listen to our opinions," she continued angrily. "You act like we don't matter. We do not work for you, Jo," she came to a conclusion. "We work _with_ you." She opened the door fully and started to walk out. Thinking of one more thing, she turned around again. "When you apologize for _all_ of that, and mean it, I'll consider forgiving you."

With that, she turned on her heel and walked back into the completely silent squad room, leaving a completely flabbergasted Jo Marlowe standing in the interview room. She strode through the room, every single person watching her, shocked at the normally cool and collective Detective Benson. On the faces of the six who mattered, there was only pride. They couldn't have said it better themselves.

But Olivia didn't look at them as she passed by, heading straight to the elevator.

Cragen snapped out of his stupor long enough to tell Elliot to take Olivia home.

Nodding, with a huge grin on his face, the detective followed his partner out, pausing only long enough to throw a glare towards his former partner as she tentatively walked out of the interview room-all eyes now shifted to her, grins popping up all over the room, whispers breaking out in all corners- before he, too, left.

_So, I know it was a long wait, but was it worth it? I hope so! And I hope you all enjoyed Olivia's little blow-up. She's usually so controlled, I really wanted her to tell Jo off for everything._

_Please REVIEW! =]_


	29. Chapter 29

**Damn, I really was trying to be more diligent about updating. I didn't want to be one of those people who started a story and then took weeks to put out new chapters! But I got distracted (again, I know) working on my screenplay. So I guess I have an excuse. I'm trying to finish it by the time I graduate, so I really need to get working. I was also still caught up with **_**Bones**_**-but I'm finally finished-ten days, five seasons, not bad. And I had some major writer's block. And then I went home for a week, and was too busy having a blast with my family. Well, enough excuses, hope you enjoy, and again, sorry about the delay!**

**Disclaimer: not mine…**

"Olivia, wait up!"

Olivia paused briefly at the door, consenting to give Elliot time to catch up to her, before she left. When he arrived, slightly out of breath, she walked out onto the street, not saying a word. Just as silently, Elliot followed.

Olivia was fuming. She had no idea what finally made her yell at the ADA, but she was glad she had. A part of her brain, of course, was feeling guilty for being so mean, but the larger part was feeling incredibly proud for finally taking a stand. Every little comment, every needling remark, every insult, had finally banded together in her mind; there was only so much a person could take before they snapped. And Olivia had reached that point.

As she walked, she slowly became aware of the burning feeling in her abdomen. Gradually, the anger left, to be replaced with exhaustion. All she wanted to do now was go home and go to bed. It had been a long day.

As if on cue, Elliot reached out to rest a hand on her shoulder, effectively halting her. When she turned to look at him, he wordlessly reached an arm out to summon a cab. Olivia smiled her thanks as she watched one pull up, and Elliot open the door for her. But her confusion was mounted when he followed her inside.

"I told Cragen I'd take you home," Elliot answered her unspoken question.

Olivia nodded silently and settled back into the seat. She closed her eyes, and Elliot watched with fascination as the clenched jaw and tight features melted away to relaxation and contentedness. He reached out and covered her hand in his, letting them rest together on her knee. Olivia leaned over to lay her head on his shoulder, sighing gladly.

When the cab pulled up to Olivia's apartment building, Elliot looked over at his partner and sighed. Her eyes were closed and she seemed to be asleep, or very nearly there. He shook his head, hating himself for having to do this.

"Liv," he called quietly. Olivia stirred, groaning. Elliot chuckled, and spoke louder. "Come on, Liv, time to wake up."

"I'm awake," Olivia mumbled, eyes still closed.

"I could always carry you," Elliot offered, knowing it would have the desired effect.

Olivia opened her eyes and sat up quickly. "I'm up, I'm up," she protested, opening the cab door and stepping out.

Elliot laughed and shook his head. With a nod and thanks to the cab driver, he handed the man some money and followed Olivia out of the car.

**XXX**

When Olivia entered her apartment, she headed straight for the couch. Settling down, she curled her feet under her, leaning down until she was using the armrest as a pillow. Closing her eyes, she hoped that Elliot would take the hint and not bring up her near breakdown in the precinct.

She should have known better.

Elliot sat down next to her. He made sure to keep a respectable distance, and didn't look in her direction; rather, he stared intently at the blank TV screen in front of him. A small corner of his mind noted that Olivia had finally broken down and bought that flatscreen. He wondered if she had used it yet. He knew that she wasn't much of a television watcher.

He shook his head to clear it, bringing his thoughts back to the present. They needed to talk. "Don't pretend to be asleep," Elliot chided, sneaking a furtive glance in her direction, confirming that her eyes were still closed.

Olivia sighed, and reluctantly sat up. She refused to look at Elliot, choosing to focus on the coffee table. Her eyes glanced along the grain and whorls of the wood, detecting a subtle and graceful pattern; she took note of the water stains that were etched into the surface, more proof of how little she seemed to be concerned with the state of her apartment, and where she spent most of her time when she was actually home; she briefly visualized those elusive nights, curled up on the couch with a case file or two spread out around her, a mug of coffee sitting on that table, slowly staining the wood underneath, as it rested there, forgotten in the wake of some useful piece of knowledge gleaned from the files.

Making an effort to throw off the nostalgia for a simpler time, Olivia focused back on Elliot, who was now watching her worriedly. She had gotten that far-off look in her eyes, and he knew she had to be caught up in a memory; what that memory was, he had no idea. But it seemed to be a peaceful one.

"So, what happened today?" he questioned. He wasn't upset or angry, and he didn't want to admit that-hearing her yelling at Jo-he had been incredibly turned on. He just wanted to make sure that she was OK, that she wasn't beating herself up for snapping. He wanted to know what she was thinking at that moment. He wanted her to let him in.

Olivia sighed. Her hands subconsciously began playing with the hem of her shirt. She didn't know what the right answer was here. He didn't seem upset, but she had to wonder why exactly he had come home with her. He had said that Cragen had asked him, but she thought maybe it had been to get them alone so that he could reprimand her for her actions. She _had_, after all, just gone completely psycho on his old partner.

"Elliot…" Olivia trailed off. She wasn't sure what to say.

Elliot smiled. "You were amazing, Liv," he beamed with pride.

Olivia looked up, shocked, finally meeting her partner's gaze. There was nothing but joy and delight in his eyes. Slowly, tentatively, she smiled back. "I didn't mean to go all…you," she said ruefully, her eyes twinkling with some of their old fervor.

Elliot chuckled at the explanation. He wasn't offended, he knew it was accurate. "Well, you do an excellent 'me'," he replied gallantly.

Olivia had to laugh at that, lightly though, her stomach was burning, a constant reminder of how much she had overextended that day. The laugh quickly turned into a groan, and her hand went to her abdomen, as some reflex idea that the presence of the limb would somehow make the injury hurt less.

Elliot stopped smiling and looked at her in concern. He knew she had overdone it; it had been an exciting day, and she had to be in pain.

He quickly got up and made a beeline for the bathroom. Finding the nearly full bottle of pain medication sitting next to the sink, he grabbed it and headed to the kitchen.

Returning to the living room, meds in one hand, glass of water in the other, he resumed his position next to his partner. He handed her first the medication, then the glass, smiling at her grimace. He had expected some sort of complaint.

But she didn't have it in her to resist. Normally, she hated taking medication. She hated the feeling of dependency, the idea that she needed to rely on something else to make her feel better. She was more independent than that. She was stronger than that. But today she was just tapped out. Bled dry. She didn't have the strength to argue, so she accepted the help.

Setting the glass on the coffee table-on top of a newspaper so that it wouldn't leave yet another water stain on her already blemished coffee table-she nodded her thanks to her partner and settled back against the armrest, swinging her feet around so that they were resting in Elliot's lap. She shivered slightly.

And of course, Elliot noticed. She didn't even have to say anything, and Elliot was already reaching over to grab the afghan blanket from its current resting position on the floor, and draping it over her body. Olivia gratefully pulled the blanket up until it was covering her from the shoulders down.

"Thanks," she said quietly.

Elliot didn't speak, but squeezed her foot-the only part of her he could comfortably reach-reassuringly. He knew how hard it was for her to depend-or lean-on anything, even just a little pill.

They sat in silence for a few minutes, just enjoying each others company. Elliot was now resting his hand on Olivia's shin, underneath the blanket. He was rubbing subconsciously, comfortingly, and thinking about how _right_ this felt, when Olivia broke the silence.

"Don't you have to go back to work?" she asked drowsily. She was still sitting sideways, her head resting against the back of the couch. Her eyes were beginning to droop; she was still coherent, and when her eyes were open she was staring at Elliot, admiring the many facets of his profile. But it was getting easier, every time she blinked, to just keep her eyes closed.

Elliot looked up and smiled at her tired form. He could tell she was about to fall asleep. He shook his head. "I'm sure Cragen guessed I wouldn't be coming back today," he said calmly. Changing his voice abruptly to a more stern tone, he patted her leg lightly. "Time for bed, little girl." He laughed at Olivia's glare.

It lost power pretty quickly. Olivia's expression softened as she visibly drooped. Slowly, she tried to stand up. She didn't get very far, and collapsed back into the couch with a grunt.

Elliot swallowed his laughter this time; he knew she was frustrated. Keeping a straight face, he stood up and offered her a hand.

Olivia looked at the offered limb for a moment, deliberating on whether or not she should take it, or continue trying to get up herself, just to prove she didn't need anyone's help. Finally, with another glance upward at Elliot's carefully blank face-he definitely knew the inner debate going through her mind-she sighed and took the hand.

Elliot carefully pulled her upright, and, not letting go, led her back towards her bedroom. He got her settled in bed-an easy task, considering she was already wearing sweatpants-jeans still proving to be too much of a challenge just yet-and was making his exit after a soft kiss goodnight, when Olivia's voice stopped him.

"Stay."

Elliot turned around, confused. She seemed unsure, a little afraid, as if she thought he might say no.

"You're sure?" he asked, just as tentatively. He didn't want to push anything, and he knew that her asking him to stay was a big step for her.

Olivia nodded and looked over to the empty side of her bed, reaching out to pull down the covers next to her. "Please?" she asked, looking back up.

Without any more hesitation, Elliot walked over to join his girlfriend. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he quickly pulled off his shoes and swung his feet up on the bed. He moved back so that he was sitting with his back resting against the headboard, and pulled the blanket up so that it fully covered his legs.

Olivia lay back down, resting her head against his thigh. She smiled and sighed contentedly. She liked this human pillow.

Elliot smiled and ran a hand through her hair, playing with the chestnut strands, admiring the way her hair glittered with so many different shades of brown in the afternoon sun that was streaming through the window, casting a warm glow on the room. Olivia sighed again, and didn't fight the fog of sleep any more, as it descended around her and pulled her from reality into dreamland.

_I know this is incredibly short, but I feel so bad for not updating in so long! I went back and checked, and I realize it's been almost three weeks! I'm so sorry. And I realize this is kind of just a filler chapter, but I've still got a little writer's block, and I'm not sure where to go next. So if anyone has ideas, please help me out!_

_Reviews are always appreciated!_


	30. Chapter 30

**Ok, I'm really trying right now to get a move on, on these updates. School starts in under a week (yea! Senior year- I don't know whether to be totally excited or totally freaked out), and then my time will be down to zero. Plus, I'd really like to finish this before the season begins, so I need to pick up the pace!**

**And I'm sorry if things seem a little strange, I'm going from writing this fanfic, to writing my screenplay, to writing a treatment for my grad school applications, so I'm trying to make sure that it's the right style of writing for the right project, but I'm sorry if I fall a little short.**

**Disclaimer: I really shouldn't have to say it anymore =]**

Elliot gave up on trying to read the document in front of him, and lay his head down on his desk, choosing instead to use the frustrating document as a pillow. He groaned loudly into the paper, causing Munch and Fin to look up.

"What's going on, Stabler?" Fin asked, slightly annoyed. He was getting tired of this 'Elliot without Olivia'. He had never really appreciated before just how much she tapered her partner. The man was almost impossible to handle without her as a buffer.

Still, he wanted to be sympathetic. He knew that Elliot missed his partner. They all did. But Olivia really needed to come back soon, before he ended up doing something to the man that he couldn't take back.

Elliot didn't raise his head when he replied. "Didn't get a lot of sleep last night," he mumbled, yawning into his desk.

"Why not?" Munch queried.

Elliot finally raised his head and sighed. "Kathy," was his only response.

Munch and Fin both winced.

"I thought things were good between you two," Munch commented, confused.

Elliot shrugged. "It was, right up until it was all finalized." He pushed back from the desk angrily. "She made me come over to the house last night, and kept me there half the night, trying to convince me to give it another try, for Eli's sake."

"That's tough, man," Fin sympathized. "What did you tell her?"

Elliot stood up, gathering some papers to file. "I told her I was done trying." He walked over to the filing cabinet in the corner and started sorting the papers into the right folders. "She knows it just doesn't work between us anymore, I think she's just scared of being on her own for the first time since she was in high school."

Munch raised his eyebrow. "Are you scared?" he asked coyly, trying to test the detective into revealing the nature of his new relationship with Olivia.

Elliot didn't break stride. He finished his filing, and returned to his desk. "No," he replied simply, picking up the form he had been so frustrated with, and began to diligently finish filling it out.

Munch and Fin looked at each other, but didn't say anything. This wasn't the sort of conversation they should have at the precinct; they would just wait until later, and then force it out of him. The evil smirks they were both wearing successfully conveyed the plan to each other.

Elliot, oblivious to the dire plans his colleagues were making behind his back, looked up a moment later in confusion. His sixth sense was tingling, and that could only mean one thing. Sure enough, a second later, he watched as Olivia walked through the squad room, not pausing to glance at her partner or fellow detectives, and disappeared into the captain's office.

Elliot looked over at Munch and Fin now, to see if they had noticed anything. They had. Their expressions similarly conveyed confusion and curiosity, with a glint of hopefulness. They had all noticed how strong and sure Olivia had seemed, striding purposefully through the bull pen.

They all stared at the door to the office. None of them were thinking about work anymore.

**XXX**

Olivia knocked quickly on Cragen's door, and then entered without waiting for a response, pushing it closed behind her.

Turning around to take in the captain, she saw the surprise on his face, before he quickly smoothed his expression out.

"Olivia! What are you doing here?"

Olivia smiled ruefully and took the seat he was gesturing to. "I want my job back," she stated positively.

Cragen was silent. She looked much better, but it really hadn't been that long since she had been released from the hospital.

Olivia saw his hesitation and knew the reasons behind it. Grinning smugly, she pulled a piece of paper out of her pocket and waived it in the air. "But, da-ad," she drew the word out, knowing what it did for him, "I have a note from my doctor and everything!"

She handed to paper to Cragen, who took it, doing his best not to laugh at her-quite excellent-impression of a third grader.

Skimming the document, he saw that it was indeed a letter from Doctor Stevens stating that Olivia was physically fit for duty. He looked back up at his favorite detective, and gave in to the smile.

"All right, I give up," he folded up the paper and placed it on his desk. "You're on desk duty though, until you pass the firearms re-certification, and talk to a psychologist." He paused for a moment. "It doesn't have to be Huang," he ventured carefully.

Olivia rolled her eyes. "Captain, I don't blame him, I have no problems talking to him or working with him."

Cragen nodded. "Good," he stated, and then nodded his head towards the door. "Now get to work."

Olivia stood up, trying-and failing-to replace the grin with a more appropriate work expression. With one more glance at the man who had become so close to a father to her, she retreated from the office, closing the door behind her.

Cragen shook his head. "Hopefully things will go back to normal now," he mumbled. Silently he chastised himself for thinking that things would be the same as they had been before the whole incident had happened. He knew that Elliot and Olivia's relationship had changed. He didn't know when they would get the courage to admit it to him, but he knew it had happened. _Well, if anything, things will definitely be more interesting_, he mused, shuffling the papers around in an attempt to act busy.

**XXX**

Munch, Fin, and Elliot were all still watching the captain's door, as if some convoluted thought told them that by staring at the door long enough, they would be able to hear the conversation going on behind it.

As they watched intently, the door opened and Olivia exited. Amongst all of the stares-everyone else in the squad room had noticed her return and was now watching intently-she walked up to her desk and sat down, avoiding all of the looks. She let out a small sigh of contentment as she sat down, pushing herself closer to her desk with a little grin.

Elliot finally broke the silence. "What are you doing here?" he asked curiously. She hadn't said anything about coming back, and he was surprised. He would have thought she would have mentioned something.

Olivia finally looked up, meeting her partner's gaze with a small smirk. "I work here," she replied coyly.

Elliot grinned as he flashed back to a very similar conversation they had had several years ago.

Before he could say anything else, Munch and Fin jumped in.

"So does this mean you're back?" Fin asked hopefully.

Olivia tore her gaze away from her partner who was giving her a very intense look that she did not think was quite appropriate for work. She glanced over at Fin, and had to laugh at the puppy dog expression on his face. "Yes, I'm back," she chuckled, shaking her head. "And I'm guessing you're going to start thanking me for saving you from these-" she stopped briefly, to glance from Elliot to Munch, and continued, "people," she finished, making it clear that she had intended to call them something else.

She and Fin shared a knowing glance, as he replied fervently, "You bet I am." The two of them laughed together, both noting to themselves how good it felt after so long.

"Hey!" Munch complained, more out of habit than because he was offended. He had really missed the playful banter that usually took place in the squad room. The place just seemed so_ wrong_ without Olivia.

Olivia rolled her eyes, still smiling. "So, what've we got?" she asked, turning back to Elliot.

It took him a moment to shift gears, and when he did he had to shake his head. She hadn't been back five minutes, and she was already jumping back to work. "Come on, Liv, at least take a moment to reorient yourself before you hop right back in the field."

"Olivia won't be doing any hopping at the moment, will she?" Cragen had come out to join the detectives. Under his stern stare, Olivia had to nod somberly. Cragen continued, "You already promised, don't make me chain you to that desk."

Olivia sighed exasperatedly. "I know, I know," she glared, trying to contain her anger, which she knew was unfounded. Cragen cared about her, and aside from that, he was following department protocol. But it wasn't like he had to keep reminding her; she felt as if he was treating her like a child. She stood up abruptly, shoving her chair back. "Pass the firearms re-certification, talk to Huang, I got it." With that, she left the squad room, leaving shock and silence in her wake.

Cragen looked at Elliot. "What did I say?" he asked, confused.

Elliot stood up and looked at his captain. "Could have something to do with you treating her like she's ten," he replied shortly, looking in the direction Olivia had gone; he knew where she was going. He glanced back at Cragen. "She knows the protocol; you don't have to remind her."

With that, Elliot followed Olivia out of the room. Cragen looked around at the remaining detectives. He did not enjoy the accusatory glares he was getting. After an awkward silence, he beat a fast retreat, withdrawing into his office once again.

**XXX**

She was on the roof, as Elliot knew she would be. He pushed open the door and stopped breathing; it was a beautiful morning, and the light bouncing off of the buildings made Olivia almost look like she was glowing. The sun hit her hair, lighting it up in different shades of brown, sparkling joyfully.

She was leaning on the railing, staring at the distant Chrysler Building. Olivia felt Elliot's presence beside her, though she didn't turn to look.

After a few moments of peace, both of them simply enjoying the view and each other's company, Olivia broke the silence.

"I shouldn't have done that."

Elliot chuckled, still looking straight ahead. "Perhaps not," he agreed.

Olivia sighed and looked down at her hands.

Elliot, now watching out of the corner of his eye, saw her brow furrow, and knew that she was troubled. It didn't take a genius to figure out why. He reached over to take her hand, squeezing tightly. "He knows you didn't mean it," he said simply, knowing that he didn't need to say more than that.

Olivia took a breath as if to answer, and then looked at their locked hands and let the air out, closing her mouth with a smile. "I know," she whispered, moving her other hand so that it was covering his, making a sort of sandwich.

They stayed that way for several more minutes, before Elliot suggested that they go back inside. Olivia was less than thrilled with the idea, but she knew she needed to plant her butt in her chair and not complain. She would be back in the field soon, and it was no use complaining over what she couldn't change.

With a sigh that had more to do with a stiff back than anything else, she straightened up, rolling her shoulders in an effort to loosen up. Hands still interlocked, she and Elliot made their way back down to the squad room.

**XXX**

Cragen was back in his office when the pair entered, and Olivia was secretly grateful. She felt badly about her outburst, but she was glad to not have to deal with the repercussions right away.

Ignoring the looks from the room, she and Elliot made their way to their desks and sat down. Elliot wordlessly handed Olivia some of the paperwork that was sitting in a massive pile on his desk, and they both got to work.

Fin and Munch, looking on, wondered at how Olivia had gone from sixty to zero in so short a time. It was like Elliot had some sort of calming power over her, just like she had over him. Even in just the few minutes that Olivia had been back, they noticed how much calmer Elliot had gotten. Sharing another knowing glance, the two shook their heads and got busy with paperwork as well.

Cragen, looking out of his office, saw all four detectives hard at work and smiled. It was good to have the unit whole again.

* * *

Olivia signed another form and then looked up. It had been a pretty boring first day back. The day on average had been rather quiet. Alex and Casey had come by to find out where they were on a couple of older cases that had started before her return; both had welcomed her back and promised to go out to catch up over the weekend.

Munch and Fin had been out and about, interviewing people and following leads; Elliot had made several trips to the crime lab and morgue, gathering evidence to add to the file.

And Olivia had stayed at her desk. All day. And now it was almost seven, and she was ready to leave. As soon as Elliot got off the phone.

Elliot caught her staring and offered a smile, which she returned warmly. Eyes locked, Elliot finished his conversation. "Yes," he said into the phone. A pause and then, "All right, let me know." Another pause. "Yes, you can reach me at this number." With that, he hung up, diverting his eyes briefly to the phone as he set it in the cradle.

Looking back up, he caught Olivia's gaze again, and smiled.

With a raising of eyebrows and a slight jerk of the head, Elliot indicated that he was ready to leave. Nodding, Olivia rose out of her chair and gathered up her bag, packing some files to review at home. Elliot mimicked her actions, and with a wave good bye to Munch and Fin, the two detectives made their way out of the squad room.

As soon as they had left the room, Munch turned back to Fin. "You owe me fifty bucks," he commented simply.

Fin's retort was cut off as Melinda walked into the room, stopping at Fin's desk. She returned his welcoming smile, asking, "Was that Olivia I saw leaving?"

Fin stood up, kissing her chastely on the lips. Pulling back, he confirmed, "Yeah, first day back."

Melinda nodded a hello to Munch. "Good," she replied. "This place was going down the tubes without her."

"So you're saying we can't do anything by ourselves?" Munch asked indignantly.

Melinda chuckled, watching Fin pack up. "Not at all, John," she placated him. "I'm just saying that you do it much better when you're all healthy and _here_."

"I'm all ready," Fin effectively ended the conversation. He put an arm around Melinda and started to lead her towards the elevator. Turning around just before he opened the door, he addressed Munch one more time. "And I don't owe you nothin' until we've got indisputable proof." He turned back and they continued out of the room, Fin calling over his shoulder, "You catch them in the act, or you get confirmation from one of them, and then I'll pay you."

Munch's extravagant sigh was lost on the empty room. Shaking his head, he too began to gather his belongings, interrupted as Cragen walked out of his office.

"Everyone else leave?" the captain asked, leaning against Fin's desk.

Munch nodded as he stood up, a pile of folders in one hand, slinging his back over the other shoulder. "Fin just left with Melinda, and Elliot and Liv cleared out about ten minutes ago."

Cragen nodded. "Have a good night," he said, already turning around to head back to his office.

"You too, Cap," Munch replied to his retreating back.

**XXX**

And once again the squad room was empty. Cragen sat at his desk, contemplating. He had watched Olivia carefully all day, making sure that she was OK. She hadn't wavered, she hadn't given any outward sign of pain or discomfort. And he was glad for that. But watching her as he had, he had also noticed the furtive glances she and her partner had shared throughout the day. He had seen the discreet touches, Elliot gently resting a hand on the small of her back, or softly rubbing her shoulder or arm. He had seen the smiles she gave him as he did so.

He had seen also the smoldering looks, the ones that could light a room on fire, the ones that were given with such intensity that they captured the complete attention and insured that nothing else would be noticed.

He knew, now, that their relationship had manifested. He strongly believed that when Olivia had excused herself to the restroom and Elliot had gone down to the file room, they had in fact met in the same place; both had taken an unusually long time to return to the bull pen, and once they had, they both looked strangely satisfied.

Cragen shook his head. There was no use worrying about this now. He had already thought about measures to take once this happened. But he didn't need to officially do anything until they told him. He just hoped that they were in it for the long haul; the NYPD, and SVU, would take a huge hit if this thing didn't work.

Cragen snorted that thought away as soon as it occurred. Olivia never jumped into a relationship without thinking it through thoroughly. And Elliot would never hurt Olivia. If they were a couple, it was because they had both made a serious commitment to make it work. And Cragen knew it would last, because neither of them would let the other walk away angry. They just couldn't exist without having each other in their lives, in some way. Even if it was just as friends.

Cragen shook himself out of his thoughts, focusing himself on the moment. There was a phone call he needed to make. _More preparation_. Picking up the phone, he dialed the number and waited as it rang.

_Who is Cragen calling? Will Elliot and Olivia tell Cragen? Coming soon, if you REVIEW!_

_I realized that I've been sort of neglecting Melinda and Fin's relationship, as well as leaving out other characters besides E/O, so I'm trying to rectify that.  
_

_I'm so sorry that these updates are slowing down so much. I'm very upset at myself. But I hope this was good for all of you. I promise I will try to update soon. Maybe very soon, since I'm sitting on a train on my way home for my stepdad's birthday right now, and I don't have internet, or anything else to distract me (other than, of course, my screenplay, and grad school applications, and-oh yeah, I have the 2009 Star Trek movie in my backpack) =] I'll try though! Please review!_


	31. Chapter 31

**Who did Cragen call? As promised, here's the next chapter!**

**Disclaimer: not mine =[**

As Cragen waited for his call to be picked up, he rifled through the document in front of him. A list of some of the do's and don't's in the NYPD. He had already read it through, at least twice, in preparation for this call, but there was no harm in looking again.

Finally someone picked up. "Hamilton," came the muffled voice on the other end.

Cragen smiled wryly. He was thankful that he had the Chief of Detective's cell phone number. It meant he didn't have to go through any official channels at One PP just yet.

"Chief, it's Don Cragen."

After a moment's pause, he heard a sigh. "What is it, Don?" The chief asked warily. It usually wasn't a good sign when professional calls were made to his personal cell phone.

Cragen's smile turned into a grin; the chief was on guard. Then his smile disappeared. This would be tricky, and he needed to be completely focused.

He looked down at the papers in front of him again. "I have a…hypothetical question for you Chief."

There was another pause. The chief thought he might actually know what Cragen was talking about, but he would let the captain fully disclose all of the details. "Go on," he instructed.

Cragen picked up a specific page. "Well," he started, "I've been going through some of the guidelines for NYPD officers, and in all of my research, I haven't found anything that explicitly forbids partners to become romantically involved…" He trailed off here, trying to put the next part into words.

The Chief sighed again. "I don't hear a question yet, Don," he nudged.

Cragen cleared his throat. "Well, sir, it isn't forbidden, just severely frowned upon…" Again he paused, before finding the words and continuing. "Sir, I guess what I'm asking is, do I have your blessing to give them my blessing, provided their case closure rate doesn't suffer?"

Chief Hamilton shook his head, smiling wryly. He knew exactly which pair Cragen was talking about, but he needed to hear it for sure. If it was the dynamic duo, he really didn't have any problems with it; those two had a stellar record, and they were closer than partners had any right to be. Even he could see that they cared about each other far more than natural for just a platonic relationship.

"Exactly who are we talking about here, Don?" he asked.

Cragen pinched the bridge of his nose. So far he wasn't hearing any emotion, good or bad, in the chief's voice. "Benson and Stabler, sir," he answered dutifully.

Finally the Chief let out a dry chortle. "I thought as much." He shook his head. "Are you telling me, on the record, that they are now officially a couple?"

Cragen heard the humor in the chief's voice, and the worried knot in his chest began to loosen. He even felt like he might be able to joke now. "_Off_ the record, I might be saying that, sir," he replied wryly. "_On_ the record, I'm not saying anything until you give me an answer."

Chief Hamilton shook his head again. Never ask an SVU employee to rat out a member of their squad. That applied for the captain just as much as it did for the detectives. It was annoying and frustrating, and it made a chief feel incredibly proud. The people who worked at SVU were amazingly close-knit. He had noticed it a lot over the years. Thinking back to himself now, though, he had to admit it had not been quite so until about a decade ago. The people who worked there now had done so longer than anyone was expected to; and somehow they thrived. They saw the worst parts of humanity every single day, and yet, leaning on each other, they managed to claw their way out of the pits of hell to come back up and be the selfless, devoted, well-adjusted human beings they showed to the rest of the world.

Realizing that Cragen was still waiting for an answer, he hardly even had to think. Benson and Stabler had always gone above and beyond for each other. They already acted like they were together, and he had very few doubts that anything would change if they did in fact become a couple in reality. "I see no problem at the moment," he replied. "As long as they continue to behave as the partners and detectives that they were before embarking in a relationship." He heard Cragen's sigh of relief on the other end, and smiled. "However, if their case closure rate falls, or their partnership starts suffering, I guarantee you that IAB will be all over it."

Cragen nodded, knowing that the chief couldn't see it. "I understand sir."

Hamilton continued, "And Don, I don't need to tell you that if the relationship goes south…"

He trailed off, leaving the implications hanging there, unsaid but no less unclear.

Cragen cleared his throat. "I know, sir, but I don't believe that will happen. Elliot and Olivia would never _let_ that happen; they care too much about each other to ever let this thing fail."

Hamilton chortled again. "Agreed," he commented sardonically. "Just one more condition," he concluded.

Cragen felt his heart rate speed up. "Yes sir?"

The chief heard the worry in the captain's voice and chuckled. "I want to be invited to the wedding."

Cragen let out a sigh of relief. "I'll pass that along, sir."

Hamilton nodded deliberately. "You do that."

Cragen managed to get out a "Thank you, sir," before hanging up. He went weak with relief. That conversation had gone better than he could have hoped. And with the Chief of Detective's approval, he didn't need to worry about IAB finding out and throwing a hissy fit. Cragen smiled. Elliot and Olivia would be incredibly happy. But there was no harm in letting them sweat a little before he told them.

* * *

"So this is your idea of a romantic date," Melinda commented from her position on the floor, holding up her take out container of Lo Mein and gesturing to the half full bottle of beer sitting next to her.

Fin hurried back from the kitchen, popping the lid off of his second beer of the evening. "What can I say," he replied, flashing a lopsided grin. "I'm a guy."

Melinda smiled back, but felt her brain go strangely empty, and couldn't respond. _He has no idea what that crooked grin does to me_, she thought giddily as she half-watched him settle himself next to her and pick up his own container of Chinese takeout.

"Hmm?" she asked, realizing that she had missed Fin's question.

He smiled, somehow knowing what she had been thinking about. "I asked, how's Tamara?"

Melinda smiled. She loved that he was so interested in her daughter. He really wanted to know, it wasn't just small talk. "She's a teenager," she replied, as an explanation. "She thinks the world revolves around her, she's pissed off that her parents aren't getting back together, and she pretty much hates the universe. Usual teenager stuff."

Fin nodded sympathetically. "I guess I can't really say I understand," he consoled, "but if you need anything, I'm here."

Melinda flashed a brilliant smile, and Fin felt himself melt under its radiance. She did the same thing for him that he did for her.

Melinda couldn't believe how lucky she was. He didn't lie to her, he didn't tell her he knew what she was going through; he was just _there_, a shoulder to lean on if she needed it, but he didn't force it. She was so grateful.

"Thank you," she said quietly, with feeling, so that he would know how much that simple offer had meant to her.

Fin smiled and leaned over, capturing her lips in a very Lo Mein tasting kiss.

* * *

Elliot sat up quickly, trying to shake the remnants of his dream away. He looked over at the beautiful sleeping form of Olivia next to him. She looked so peaceful, so tranquil, that he had to smile. he lightly traced her shoulder, running his finger down her arm, barely touching, but needing to know that she was really there.

He was startled out of his thoughts in the next second when Olivia spoke. She didn't open her eyes or move, she simply asked, "Are you OK?"

Elliot drew back, surprised. "You're awake?"

Olivia sighed and turned over, opening her eyes and looking at him. "Honey, how could I possibly sleep with you thinking so loudly?" she levered herself up on her elbows and moved over slightly, laying herself back down again, this time using Elliot's stomach as a pillow. "What's wrong?" she asked again, sighing contentedly.

Elliot smiled and ran his fingers through her hair and draped his other hand across her stomach. She was definitely real. "Just a bad dream," he admitted quietly.

Olivia moved her hand to cover his, squeezing gently. "How bad?" she asked.

Elliot sighed. "We were at the hospital," he stated monotonically, not wanting to repeat this but knowing that she would keep asking until he told her. "You had flat lined…and they couldn't get your heart started again." He closed his eyes, feeling the tears well up and refusing to let them fall. It hadn't happened. She had lived. She was a fighter, and she had survived. She always survived.

Olivia squeezed his hand harder. "It's OK, El," she said softly. "I'm here."

Elliot hugged her awkwardly from behind, pulling her body even closer to his. "We're both here," he stressed.

Olivia smiled, feeling sleep coming on again as she felt Elliot relax behind her. "I love you."

And with that statement, Elliot felt all the residual fear from his nightmare vanish. "I love you too," he replied, closing his eyes once more.

**XXX**

It seemed like mere seconds, or maybe it was minutes or hours, before Elliot and Olivia were jarred from a peaceful slumber by the sound of frantic knocking on the front door.

"I'll get it," Elliot grumbled, making no move to get up.

"Is that a real 'I'll get it', or are you just waiting for me to say 'go back to bed, honey, I've got it'?" Olivia asked, eyes still closed.

Elliot smiled groggily. "I haven't decided yet," he replied.

Olivia groaned and sat up. "Go back to bed, honey, I've got it," she deadpanned, grabbing his shirt off of the floor and throwing it on as she left the bedroom and headed towards the front door.

**XXX**

"Hold on, I'm coming," Olivia called as the knocking sounded again. Pulling open the door abruptly, her disgruntlement changed quickly to surprise and worry. "Maureen, what are you doing here?"

Maureen looked up at her father's partner, and started crying.

Shocked, Olivia did the only thing she could think of; she reached out and pulled Maureen into a hug.

Maureen put her arms around Olivia and held on tight. She didn't know what it was, but something had told her to go to Olivia tonight, rather than her own mother. She was glad she had. "Is my dad here?" she managed to get out between sobs.

Olivia kept rubbing her back soothingly. Her mind was in a blur. What had happened? "He is," she answered, moving as if to pull away. "Would you like me to get him?"

Maureen held on harder, refusing to let go. "No!" she said, a little louder than she had intended.

Surprised, Olivia complied, resuming her earlier position. Her number one priority right now was to calm Maureen down; then she'd find out what had happened.

They stayed entangled standing on the threshold for a good five minutes before Maureen's sobs began to subside. Soon they were just breathy gasps entwined with a few hiccups. When Maureen felt she had enough control of herself, she pulled back, sniffing loudly.

"Sorry," she mumbled, looking down as she wiped her nose across the back of her hand.

Olivia kept one hand on her shoulder, and now she squeezed reassuringly. "Don't be sorry," she said. Smiling wryly she added, "Do you want to come in?"

Maureen gave a watery chuckle and nodded, following Olivia to the couch. She looked hesitant for a minute as Olivia gestured for her to take a seat, but then complied, watching as Olivia collapsed next to her. They sat that way in silence for a few minutes. Olivia wasn't going to make the first move. Maureen had shown up at her apartment in the middle of the night; something had clearly happened, but she didn't want the girl to feel trapped, like she _had_ to say anything.

The silence was broken by Elliot. "Liv? Who was there?" he called out as he made his way to the front of the apartment. He stopped short when he saw his daughter sitting on his girlfriend's couch, face tear-streaked and looking scared. "Mo, what happened?" he asked worriedly, rushing to kneel down in front of his daughter. As he reached for her hands, it didn't escape his or Olivia's attention the way she recoiled from his touch, flinching as his hands moved forward. She looked beseechingly at Olivia; she didn't want to say it aloud, and she hoped that the woman would understand.

She did. Resting a hand on Elliot's shoulder, she said gently, "Go back to bed, El."

He looked like he was about to protest, but one look into his girlfriend's eyes, and his protests died in his throat. She flickered her eyes back towards the bedroom, and he understood that Maureen just wanted to talk to her. He understood that Olivia had everything under control, and if she did need help, he would just be down the hall. With one final squeeze of Maureen's hand, he stood up again and headed down the hall.

Once Maureen heard the bedroom door close, she turned to Olivia. "Thanks," she said quietly.

Olivia smiled and nodded. "Don't mention it," she admonished.

Maureen looked back towards the bedroom, and then studied Olivia once more; it didn't escape her attention that the woman was wearing her father's shirt. She raised her eyebrows. "So… are you guys…"

Olivia sighed exasperatedly. "Mind in the gutter woman!" she joked playfully, knowing that the girl needed the lighter mood.

Maureen smiled. "But you are…together?" It came out as more of a question than a statement.

Olivia's mood turned somber. Of all the people she and Elliot had to tell about their new found relationship, it was Elliot's children that she feared telling the most. She didn't want them to feel like it was her fault their parents had split up, or that she was trying to be their new mother. "Yes," she stated earnestly, looking into Maureen's eyes for any hint of accusation.

She saw only relief and happiness.

Maureen reached over and hugged her. "Congratulations, Liv," she whispered.

Olivia returned the hug, grateful. Pulling back, she had to make sure. "You're not upset?" she asked.

Maureen shook her head. "We all knew it was coming, as soon as mom and dad told us they were getting divorced." Her hands found the afghan that was draped haphazardly across the couch and began to play with the trim, looking studiously at her hands. "Dad's been in love with you for years, and I mean, sure," she shrugged, "all kids want their parents to stay together forever, but if it just doesn't work anymore, then it's for the best." She met Olivia's gaze again. "Mom's OK with it too, she's known for a while now that you guys were meant to be together. She's a little hurt and jealous, but she's not angry."

Olivia was shocked. She appreciated this speech far more than she suspected Maureen would ever realize. She had to lean over to give the girl another hug. "Thanks, Mo," she said.

When the two pulled back, both were feeling emotionally drained. Olivia looked at the girl, wondering if she was really up for hearing the reasons behind the surprise visit tonight. She didn't think she was up for it, any more than she suspected Maureen was up for sharing it.

"Do you want to sleep on the couch tonight?" she asked.

Maureen nodded quickly, grateful that Olivia wasn't pressing her to say anything about what had happened tonight. "Thanks, Liv," she said quietly as she watched Olivia walk to the hall closet and pull out sheets and a pillow.

With a nod, Olivia quickly set up the couch and watched as Maureen sat tiredly back down, swinging her legs up and laying down, resting her head against the pillow. She put one hand behind her head as she rolled onto her side, facing Olivia.

Olivia smiled and leaned over, kissing Maureen on the forehead. "Good night, honey," she whispered, before straightening up again.

As Olivia headed back to the bedroom, Maureen called out behind her, effectively halting her in her tracks. "Thank you, Olivia." The words were quiet, sincere, heartfelt. The emotion behind them felt like Olivia had thrown Maureen a lifeline, given her an out, an opportunity to gather her wits and take control of the situation. And Maureen was incredibly grateful.

Olivia turned around and smiled. "You're welcome," she said just as quietly.

The moment that was shared between the two of them was something neither would forget. It was a moment of understanding, love, and friendship.

And then the moment passed, and Olivia turned around and headed to the bedroom, closing the door behind her. As she had expected, Elliot was still awake, sitting up in bed, leaning back against the headboard.

He watched silently as Olivia climbed in next to him, lying down and snuggling closer. "Go to bed, El," she said firmly.

Elliot encircled her with his arms. "What happened?" he asked worriedly.

Olivia shook her head; Elliot felt it against his side. "She didn't say much," she replied. "She's asleep now, she's exhausted." Olivia felt Elliot about to protest and cut across any response. "Elliot, go to sleep. Maureen will talk when she's ready."

Elliot still wanted to object, but he knew that Olivia was right. With a sigh, knowing he wasn't going to get a good night's sleep, he adjusted himself so that he was lying flat, and turned on his side to face Olivia.

"I love you," he told her again, watching the smile spread across her face.

"I love you too," she replied, snuggling closer.

And with that, both detectives drifted off into a fitful slumber, thinking about the girl in the living room, sleeping on the couch for some unknown reason, and wondering what the next day would bring.

_What's wrong with Maureen? How does Cragen play with his detectives before giving them the good news? And how does everyone else find out? Do Munch and Fin get their 'concrete' proof? In what form? It's all coming if you REVIEW!_

_As promised, another chapter! I honestly have no idea where this story is going; I have half formed ideas for an ending that seems to change every other day, but I don't know if that'll be in five chapters or fifty. I guess I'll just keep writing until I get there._

_REVIEW PLEASE!_


	32. Chapter 32

**Wow, it's been a busy couple of weeks. My sister had landlady troubles, and then my car died-and yes, this was the second car I've had go caput on me this summer. I think I'm just bad luck. So I had to make an unexpected trip home to figure out what to do-turns out the clutch died, and it would cost more to replace than it's worth, so we ended up buying a new car (well, pre-owned)-and by 'we' I mean my parents, whom I totally love to death for doing so, it's just that a new car was not on their list of things to buy this summer, so it's really been stressful. And then classes started again, so I really don't have a whole lot of time anymore =[**

**Ok, rant done, sorry for that, I've just been too worked up to really write for a while, but now that things have calmed down, it's easier. So enjoy the next chapter!**

**Disclaimer: if it was mine, do you really think my **_**parents**_** would be buying me a car? Or that I would be so worked up over how expensive it was?**

The first thing Olivia heard in the morning was an incessant beeping. Groaning loudly, she turned over and flung her arm out to hit the snooze button on her alarm.

Unfortunately, there was something in the way. Something that grunted when she accidentally hit it in the eye.

Forcing her eyes open in surprise, she gasped quietly as she realized that she was not alone in bed. The events of the night before came flooding back.

Elliot opened his eyes to find Olivia staring at him. He rubbed his stinging cheek absentmindedly, and smiled.

Olivia smiled back sheepishly. "Sorry."

Elliot reached out and wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her closer. "Don't worry about it," he whispered back, leaning in to kiss her.

Olivia moaned into his mouth. Out of all the guys she had ever been with, she had never spent the night with any of them, for the simple reason that she never felt comfortable enough to let them see her so…vulnerable. But with Elliot, none of that mattered; he had already seen her helpless and exposed. He was her partner, and she trusted him implicitly not to judge her for any of it.

Pulling back, Elliot searched Olivia's eyes, looking for something. He knew she had never let herself fall before, with anyone, except perhaps him, but always in a friendship manor. Looking now, he saw none of the regret he had expected; instead, he found happiness and content. Reaching up tentatively, he brushed a lock of hair out of her face and tucked it behind her ear.

Olivia closed her eyes again, truly happy for the first time in a long time.

Not wanting to ruin the moment, but knowing that there was still a scared and hurt teenager asleep in the living room that needed attending, Olivia reluctantly opened her eyes and sat up, pushing the blankets back and swinging her feet around to rest on the floor.

Elliot followed her, sitting up as well; he rested a hand on her shoulder and began softly kissing his way down her neck.

Olivia almost felt her sense of purpose come undone as she felt what he was doing. "El," she moaned. He didn't stop, and Olivia knew she needed to get him to stop before she _couldn't _get him to stop. Pulling away and moving forward, she turned around and placed a finger on his lips to stop him. "Elliot." When he still tried to continue his assault on her neck, she pushed back more firmly. "Elliot!"

Elliot finally pulled back and looked at her questioningly. He felt a fleeting moment of panic, thinking that those elusive second thoughts had finally caught up to her; but those fears were dissuaded a moment later when Olivia smiled and put her arms around his neck.

Looking him in the eyes, she said, "Not that I'm not fully enjoying this," she paused to kiss him again, "but you're daughter is asleep on my couch right now, and I'd kind of like to know why she's here."

Elliot smiled. "Me too," he agreed, after leaning forward one more time and placing a chaste kiss on her lips. He truly loved how much she cared for his children.

Groaning slightly, Olivia stood up and began to hunt around for something to wear. She was immensely glad that it was Saturday, and a part of her mind wondered why the hell her alarm had gone off, though the larger part of her brain was consumed with how she was going to approach Maureen, and hoped that the new day would make things easier.

Fully dressed, she turned around to look at Elliot. He was picking up his shirt from where she had discarded it earlier that morning. While she watched, he slipped it on and began to button it up. Turning around, he caught her gaze and smiled.

Olivia smiled back; she loved that they could communicate so easily just by looking at each other. And at that moment, she knew that he was thinking the same thing.

When he was fully dressed, Elliot made to leave the bedroom, only to be stopped when Olivia blocked the door. He looked at her questioningly, and she placed a hand on his chest. "El, why don't you go get some breakfast for us," she suggested quietly.

Elliot's expression changed to confusion. "Why-" he started, only to be interrupted.

"Because I have absolutely nothing in my fridge or cupboards, and there are three people here who are probably starving." Olivia moved her hand to cup his cheek. "Please," she added.

Elliot searched her eyes, looking for explanation. He could tell that she was offering breakfast as an excuse, that she wanted him out of the apartment, so that she could have some alone time with Maureen, and while part of him opposed that idea, wanting to talk to his daughter and find out what was wrong, analytically he knew that she was more likely to open up to a woman, and she would most likely shut down in front of her father. Sighing slightly in defeat, he nodded. "How long should I be gone?" he asked.

Olivia stood up on her toes to kiss him softly. Pulling back she smiled. "Give me a couple of hours."

Elliot nodded and reached around her to open the door. Turning around, he captured her lips in one more hard kiss; it was raw, and passionate, and Elliot only hoped that it successfully conveyed his gratitude for her willingness to help out his oldest child, as well as his love for the wonderful human being she never ceased to be.

When Elliot pulled back this time, he turned and continued towards the door and out of the apartment, as quietly as possible so as not to disturb Maureen on the couch.

**XXX**

When Olivia managed to shake herself out of the state of shock she was left in after Elliot's departure, she made her way to the living room.

Maureen was lying on the couch; her eyes were open, and she didn't seem to recognize Olivia's entrance immediately.

Olivia hesitated for a moment, but then slowly and deliberately made her way over, and sat down by Maureen's feet. She didn't speak, she just waited for the girl to acknowledge her presence.

After a few minutes, Maureen's gaze focused, and she finally noticed the detective sitting on the end of the couch. Embarrassed, she coughed lightly as she hurried to sit up. "Liv, what's up?" she asked as she levered herself onto her elbows.

Olivia smiled, and waited until the girl was fully sitting up before she replied. "Not much, just waiting for you to wake up." She paused and shifted slightly. "How are you doing?" she asked delicately.

Maureen looked down at her lap and moved ever so slightly away from her father's partner. "OK," she answered softly. She glanced over towards the door. "Where did dad go?"

Olivia smiled. "He went to get us some breakfast, so we've got some alone time now, before he comes back." She paused again, and turned in her seat so that she was facing Maureen. "Do you think you're ready to talk now?"

Maureen shifted again. "Not really," she admitted softy.

Olivia waited, sensing that there was more that the girl wanted to say.

A moment later, she was proven right when Maureen glanced back up and held Olivia's gaze. "But I think I need to," she continued in a whisper.

Olivia felt her heart break as she saw the inner turmoil and pain in Maureen's eyes. She moved over and carefully placed an arm around her partner's daughter's shoulders. She felt the girl flinch slightly, before she leaned into the embrace. Olivia felt her beginning to lose control, and she wrapped her other arm around Maureen, hugging tightly.

"Shh," she consoled, rubbing Maureen's back reassuringly. "It's OK."

And with that, Maureen finally let it go. She began to sob hysterically into Olivia's t-shirt, feeling completely safe with the woman she had known since she was a child, and had trusted just as much as, and possibly more than, her own parents.

It was quite some time before Maureen's sobs began to subside. Olivia kept consoling her, telling her that it was all right, and to let it out; personal experience told her not to tell the girl that everything was going to be OK. She knew that whatever had happened had to be serious, and that the worst thing that a person could hear was someone who had no idea what they were going through saying that everything would be fine.

Finally, Maureen's cries changed to hiccups, and she pushed herself back, wiping the tears away. "Sorry," she mumbled, embarrassed.

Olivia's chest constricted as she felt tears of her own threaten to fall. "Don't worry about it," she replied quietly, squeezing Maureen's shoulders with the arm that was still wrapped around her thin frame.

When Maureen pulled back further, Olivia recognized it as a way to gain some control over the situation, and the detective willingly removed her arm, moving it to the back of the couch, and resting her head in her hand.

And she waited for Maureen to speak.

It was another five minutes or so before the young woman broke the uneasy silence. "I'm not usually this weepy," she gave a watery chuckle.

Olivia smiled. "I know you're not," she reassured. "You're an incredibly resilient young woman." She paused briefly; she didn't want to push, but her instinct was telling her that Maureen might need some pushing in order to open up. "Hey." She waited until Maureen was looking at her before continuing. "I'm here, I'm not judging, and I won't tell your dad anything you don't want me to."

Maureen looked at her father's partner. She really liked this woman, and at that moment she was incredibly glad that her parents had gotten divorced, because she knew that Olivia was what was best for her father. She made him a better man. And she really appreciated what she was telling her now.

"Thanks, Liv," she smiled weakly, and then added, "can you not tell my mom either?"

Olivia laughed. "You got it," she agreed.

Maureen looked down. "Thanks," she answered shyly. She paused again for a couple of minutes, trying to think of how to start.

Olivia remained silent, and waited. Just when she was thinking the girl might need another little nudge, Maureen spoke again.

"It was a party." Maureen's eyes were locked on her hands, which were busily twisting the tassels of the same afghan she had found so fascinating the night before. She continued choppily, spilling out the story, fearing that if she were to be interrupted, she wouldn't be able to continue. "I don't know why I went, but…" She glanced briefly at Olivia, who nodded encouragingly, motioning for her to continue, as if she knew that interrupting Maureen would be a very bad idea. "My friends were going, and I didn't want to spend a Friday night alone." Tears starting streaking down her cheeks again, and she paused to wipe them away, before continuing. "There's this boy that I sort of like, he's a film major, and really cool and mysterious, you know?" She looked over at Olivia again, and the detective nodded her agreement; she did understand the appeal. It was a type that many college-age kids were attracted to-god knows she herself had fallen for the type a time or two.

At Olivia's agreement, Maureen looked away again, focusing this time on the far wall, not really looking at anything in particular; she was focused on the events of the previous night, seeing it all in her mind as she described it. "We were alone in a bedroom, I don't know how I got there, but we were just talking, and then…" She paused to wipe the tears away again, and her breathing and pace sped up, rushing out the story in an attempt to get it all over with as quickly as possible. "He was kissing me, and it was nice at first, but then he got kind of rough, and he pushed me on the bed, and I was struggling, but I think he might have been drunk, and he wouldn't stop…" She gave a hard sniff and wiped her nose, doing her best not to dissolve into tears again.

Olivia watched painfully; she wanted so much to comfort Maureen at that moment, but she knew that the girl might come undone with just a simple touch, and she knew that it was important to get the whole story out, at once, so that the healing could begin. All the same, it was hard, as she was listening, to keep her mind fully focused on the present; a distant corner seemed to be traveling back in time, and was replaying a nightstick banging against bars, a creaky old mattress, and one simple phrase. _Bite me, and you're dead_.

Maureen, glancing at Olivia again, noticed the detective's eyes begin to glaze over, but she was more concerned with getting this over with to worry about what that might mean. "He ripped my shirt off, and started unzipping my jeans… I kicked him, and pushed him off, and ran out. When I left the party, I didn't know where to go…" Another sniff. "I thought about going to mom's, but I didn't want her to know. So I came here." She glanced over at Olivia again, this time paying more attention to the glazed look. "Olivia?"

Olivia heard her name being called, but couldn't muster up the energy to respond. She was still trying to get her mind out of that basement and keep it focused on the present.

Maureen was getting a little more concerned now. She couldn't figure out what was wrong with the detective; she had never seen the woman act like this before; she looked like she was seeing something that wasn't there, and in her eyes there was something that looked an awful lot like…fear. Maureen started when she had that thought; she had never known her father's partner to be afraid of anything. But it was definitely there. Maureen knew that look very well. She had seen it in her own eyes the night before as she stared at her own reflection in the elevator on her way up to this apartment. She tried again, "Olivia? Are you OK?"

Olivia finally seemed to be able to pull herself away from the memories. "Hmm?" she asked with a start, focusing on the girl in front of her and refusing to let anything else in. "Sorry, what did you say?"

Maureen managed a half smile at the forced air of casualness. "I asked if you were OK," she repeated obligingly.

Olivia tried to smile in what she hoped was a reassuring manor. "I'm fine, sweetie," she replied. Shaking off the memories and the fears of that night, she looked concernedly at the young woman in front of her. "He didn't rape you did he?"

Maureen took a deep breath and shook her head, feeling even more ashamed. The bastard hadn't even _done_ anything.

Olivia saw the downcast expression, and could guess what was going on in Maureen's mind; she had gone through it herself, and while she hated what had happened to her, she was grateful at that moment that she might be able to help Maureen.

Olivia gently moved over and placed an arm around Maureen's shoulders again, noticing the absence of the flinch that she had expected. She drew the girl closer, and observed happily when Maureen rested her head on Olivia's shoulder. "Now you listen to me," she started in a stern, yet calming, manor, "Don't you dare feel ashamed, or like you're making a big deal out of nothing."

Now Maureen popped her head up, confused; how could Olivia know what she was thinking so well? Looking into the woman's eyes as she continued talking, Maureen was struck by a horrible thought. _No, not Olivia_. She continued to watch the woman in front of her without really seeing. She couldn't wrap her head around the idea that her father's partner might know a little too well the situation she had found herself in the night before.

"Blame this boy, because what he did was wrong, but do _not_, under any circumstances, blame yourself." Olivia trailed off here, as she noticed that Maureen didn't seem to be listening anymore. She was staring, eyes blank, at Olivia, but she didn't seem to be registering the words.

Now it was Olivia's turn to call out worriedly. "Mo, honey?" No answer, so she tried again. "Maureen?"

Maureen snapped out of her haze. "Yeah?" she asked distractedly.

Olivia smiled as she recognized the twist of characters. "Are you OK? You just checked out on me there."

Maureen nodded, trying to smile. "Yeah, I'm fine," she rushed out.

The two sat in uncomfortable silence for a while longer, while Olivia waited for Maureen to say something, and Maureen tried to find a way to address her thoughts without stepping over a boundary.

Finally, after a good ten minutes listening to the garbage truck empty the dumpster that was set in the alley overlooked by one of Olivia's windows, Maureen got the courage to speak up. "Liv?"

Olivia tore her gaze off of the blank TV screen, and looked over at Maureen. "Yes?"

Maureen wouldn't meet Olivia's eyes; her gaze was locked on her hands again, sitting restlessly in her lap. "When did you…I mean, how did you…" Maureen wasn't sure she had the willpower to continue, but she really needed to know. She glanced up briefly to see Olivia waiting patiently for her to continue, and that look of love and compassion is what gave her the strength to keep going. "How did you know what I'd be feeling?" she asked in a whisper.

It was Olivia's turn to look down, withdrawing her arm to rest both hands in her lap, somewhat embarrassed. She should have known that this would come up; Maureen was an intelligent girl, of course she would have picked up on the fact that Olivia knew exactly what to say, in a way that went far deeper than just her job.

Maureen saw Olivia glance away out of the corner of her eye, and she felt horrible. She appreciated how much Olivia had not said anything and let her tell the story at her own pace, and here she was, practically demanding to hear about what could be some of the detective's inner most secrets. "I'm sorry," she rushed, "you don't have to tell me anything…"

Olivia looked up and smiled. She was never more aware of how grown up Maureen was than at this moment; she really was an adult. She reached over and placed a hand reassuringly on the girl-no, the _woman_'s-knee. She squeezed, and Maureen looked over, fear and worry shining in her eyes. "It's OK," Olivia said, withdrawing her hand.

Maureen caught the limb as it departed, keeping it locked in between their two bodies, as she held on tight. That grip was what enabled Olivia to share her story.

"It happened a couple of years ago," she started softly. Maureen listened with rapt attention. "I was undercover at a prison, trying to find a rapist." She paused for a moment and chuckled dryly. "I found him."

Maureen squeezed her hand again. "I'm so sorry," she whispered, her eyes building up with tears for Olivia, one of the strongest people she knew, and for what she had been through.

Olivia felt tears of her own threatening to fall, and for the first time, she didn't make any attempt to rein them in; she let them flow freely, knowing that Maureen needed to know that it was OK to cry, and that she was not alone. "Fin came just in time," she spoke through the tears, needing to finish the story. "I was handcuffed to a door; another ten seconds, I would have been the next victim."

She looked down as she finished, feeling all of the shame and guilt that had immediately followed the incident flow back; she, a decorated NYPD detective with one of the highest case closure rates in the city, one half of one of the best teams in the city, hadn't even been able to fight the rapist off herself. She had had to be rescued by someone else.

Shaking her head to clear it-_she had been through all of that already, and had finally been forced to realize that no one saw her differently, and none of it was her fault_- she looked up at Maureen again. "That's how I know," she said quietly, looking into Maureen's eyes so that she would believe everything the detective was telling her. "I know what you're going through, and I'm not going to tell you it'll get better, because I still have nightmares." She saw Maureen look down again, and she reached over to grasp her chin, lightly pulling the girl's face up so that they were locking eyes once more; Olivia needed to know that Maureen heard this. "I'm not going to tell you that everything will be OK, because I don't know if it will be. I'm not going to tell you that nothing happened, or you're making a big deal out of it, and I don't ever want to hear you say that. You're control was taken away from you, and that _is_ something." Olivia paused and let go of Maureen's chin; the girl immediately looked down, the tears that had been forming now flowing in a steady stream. "I'm only going to promise you this one thing." Maureen still looked down, refusing to meet Olivia's gaze. "Hey." Olivia shook Maureen's leg lightly, and the girl finally looked up, though she was focused more on the detective's chin than her eyes. Olivia smiled reassuringly. "I will be here, to talk or to listen; if you need a shoulder to cry on, or if you just don't want to be alone, I'm here."

And that was it. Maureen's body shook, and she collapsed back into Olivia, who held her comfortingly, arms wrapped tightly around the girl's frame, her own tears falling down her cheeks and disappearing into Maureen's hair.

It was long time before either woman managed to compose herself, but slowly they gained some semblance of control. Maureen pushed back, wiping her eyes and nose. As she sniffed, she asked, "Does dad know?"

Olivia, wiping her own eyes, gave a watery smile. "Yes, he does," she replied, and then elaborated. "It took me a couple of months to tell him, but I did."

Maureen smiled. "Good," she replied firmly.

Olivia looked surprised at the conviction in her voice. She raised an eyebrow.

Maureen laughed. "You look like dad when you do that," she explained as she giggled. Olivia had to laugh too, as Maureen elaborated on her previous statement. "You and dad shouldn't have secrets," she said, reaching over to the end table sitting by the couch for a tissue and passing one to Olivia, while she kept the other for herself.

As the two women wiped their eyes, Olivia spoke. "I'm glad you think so too; and don't worry, we don't."

She looked over in time to see Maureen raising an eyebrow of her own, and, just like the girl, she had to burst out laughing. "OK, now you look just like your father when you do that," she said between chuckles. Maureen did nothing, still waiting. Under the pressure, Olivia folded. "OK, so apparently we were both keeping one huge secret from the other for the last decade, but that's over now. Happy?"

Maureen recomposed her face, and a smile crept in. "Ecstatic," she replied before she started giggling along with Olivia.

Try as she might, Olivia could not detect a hint of sarcasm in the statement. She truly believed that the young woman was incredibly happy for her father, and for Olivia.

Hearing the door click open, Maureen and Olivia tried to compose themselves, but couldn't quite tame the giggles as Elliot walked into the room, followed closely by Kathleen, Lizzie, and Dickie.

Hearing the joyous sound as he entered was the most wonderful thing to Elliot, as he walked in to find his partner and his daughter in fits of giggles on the couch. "Sounds like we missed the joke," he said playfully as he walked over and took a seat on the sofa arm.

Olivia looked up at her boyfriend and smiled, managing to stop laughing, but not able to keep the sparkle out of her eyes. Elliot couldn't breathe for a moment, she was so beautiful. She lightly rested a hand on his arm. "It wasn't that funny, don't worry," she replied lightly, and then looked passed him to see the other three children standing in the entrance, each holding a bag of what she only hoped was food; all of a sudden, she became aware of just how hungry she was. "What are you guys doing here?"

Elliot answered for them, before they even had a chance to open their mouths. "I found them sitting on your apartment steps, "he replied easily. "I took them back out to get some more breakfast food, since I only had enough for three, so we're a little bit later than I had intended."

Olivia smiled. "That's OK," she replied, and then looked over at Maureen. "We've been having a great time, right?"

Maureen covertly tried to wipe her eyes one last time, hoping that the laughing they had all walked in on would serve as a cover to explain the tears. "Yeah," she agreed. Looking at her dad, she asked, "Do you have breakfast?"

They all laughed at that. Elliot jerked his thumb over his shoulder, pointing towards his three younger children. "Of course I do, I live to serve, don't I?"

Olivia stood up stiffly and placed a quick kiss on the top of his head. "Of course you do," she said sweetly.

The four children pointedly ignored this somewhat intimate act, and rushed to set up the table for six; Olivia noticed that Elliot had had the forethought to buy paper plates and plastic silverware, a good thing since she only had enough for two.

Taking advantage of the momentary solitude, Elliot wrapped an arm around Olivia's waist. He lightly pulled her down so that she was sitting-albeit awkwardly-in his lap. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he gave her a light peck on the lips, unaware of his childrens' sudden abandonment of breakfast and their now rapt attention on their father and the woman whom three of them had thought up until that moment was just his partner.

Pulling back, he grinned, noticing the way her eyes seemed to light up when she was with him. "How does a nice family breakfast sound to you?" he asked quietly, reaching up to brush some hair out of her face.

Olivia leaned forward this time and gave him a kiss that was slightly more than a peck, but kept the rating to a PG, mindful of the fact that there were children in her apartment, and she didn't want to start something that she knew she couldn't finish. Leaning back, she grinned. "Sounds great to me."

_Next, how does Cragen tell the dynamic duo of the Chief's approval? And I promise, Munch and Fin's concrete proof is coming!_

_Wow, that was long! I didn't mean for it to be that long, but this conversation with Maureen took way longer than I had intended. I didn't want to rush anything, and I really hope that this makes up for my absence of late! _

_Please, please, please REVIEW!_


	33. Chapter 33

**OK, I really am trying to keep these updates coming, even though school (well, starting Monday, after a really nice practically full week off, thanks to Labor Day and Rosh Hashanah-yeah, that's right, my college gives us the Jewish New Year off, I guess that's what we get here on Long Island =] ) is now in full swing. It'll be slow, but when I have the time, I'm really trying to keep writing. Although I have doubts that I'll really be done by the season 12 premiere. Oh well.**

**Disclaimer: Anything you recognize belongs to Dick Wolf and NBC**

"Benson!"

Olivia looked up with a start, hearing her name being called. Looking around, she realized that the voice belonged to her captain, who was standing by her desk looking down, a somewhat amused expression on his face.

"Yes, sir?" she asked quickly; looking around at her colleagues and, noticing their-failed-attempts to hide grins, she deduced that Cragen had been attempting to get her attention for a while.

Cragen's expression changed. It softened a bit, and his voice dropped closer to a whisper. He looked more concerned as he leaned down in an attempt to block out the rest of the squad room. "Are you all right?" he asked quietly.

Olivia smiled up at the worry on her captain's face. "I'm fine," she assured him. "Just daydreaming."

Cragen nodded and smiled. He could guess as to what she had been thinking about, though he really didn't want to know. "Well?" he asked, straightening back up and getting back to the reason he had ventured out of his office.

The next second, he almost laughed at the confusion on Olivia's face. She obviously had not heard his earlier question.

Olivia cleared her throat, trying to ignore the chuckles and grins around her, as they watched the amusing display of captain and detective. She managed to block them all out, except for Elliot, who was sitting right in front of her, doing his best not to make any sound as he laughed silently.

Picking up a paperclip casually, she flicked it across the desks, and saw it hit his forehead out of the corner of her eye, noting with satisfaction that the grin was immediately wiped off of his face. Looking up at the captain innocently, she turned on the charm. "Sorry Captain, could you please repeat the question?" she asked with a sheepish grin.

Cragen smiled back. It was good to see his detectives acting the way they had before Olivia's injury; for so long it had felt like nothing would ever get back to normal, but once Olivia had returned, everything just seemed to snap back into place.

"Do you have any more leads on the Wilkes case?" he repeated.

Olivia looked down and shuffled her papers around. Finding the one she was looking for, she rescued it from the pile and held it up. "A witness saw someone matching our suspect's description exiting a bodega on East 14th street." She paused and looked up, before continuing. "That's not saying much, considering our description is of an average sized man with blond hair and blue eyes."

Cragen nodded. "Keep working on it," he instructed. At Olivia's agreeing nod, he looked around the room. Elliot had buried his head back in the paperwork he had abandoned while watching his partner and captain interact. He seemed very concentrated, but Cragen suspected he wasn't really reading at all.

Looking over to Munch and Fin, he saw them both working quietly at their desks. With a smile at the efficiency of his detectives, he headed back into his office.

Once there, he sat back down and turned his thoughts back to the question he had been pondering all morning; how long would he force Elliot and Olivia to stay in the shadows before he told them what the Chief had told him. With a sigh and a shake of his head, he shuffled some papers around and attempted to act busy. He couldn't help but think about how much trouble those two caused him. _Though_, he mused with a nostalgic smile, _I wouldn't change it for the world_.

**XXX**

Once Cragen had disappeared into his office again, Olivia returned her attention to the paperwork on her desk. She attempted to concentrate, but instead found herself deliberating, yet again, on the wonderful time she had had with Elliot and his children over the weekend.

Maureen had been anxious to stay with Olivia, but reluctant to ask. The twins had apparently grown frustrated with staying alone in the house while their mother worked back-to-back shifts at the hospital, and had called Kathleen before venturing over to their father's partner's apartment. The three had made desperate pleas to spend the remainder of the weekend with their father, Olivia, and siblings, and, after getting Kathy's approval, Elliot had agreed. Olivia had to admit, fitting six people into a one bedroom apartment was not incredibly comfortable, though the camp out they had had Saturday night in her living room had been fun. Maureen had, at first, seemed reluctant to participate in any activities, shrinking away from the noise and activity; after a while, however, it seemed like she was slowly relaxing, being around her family, people who loved her unconditionally. Elliot had even managed to get Eli for Sunday, and the seven of them had spent a wonderful day in Central Park. It was like everything Olivia had ever dreamed of; for the first time in years, perhaps ever, she really felt like part of a family.

She was part of Elliot's family. It was the only place she ever wanted to be, the only place that she ever felt comfortable. The last twelve years, she had slowly been incorporated into Elliot's life, into his children's lives; it had happened so effortlessly, so seamlessly, that she hadn't even realized it was happening. But something had still seemed to be missing. Now, finally able to express her feelings for the one man she had ever let herself love, it was like the final piece had been put into place. She was finally, and irrevocably, part of a family.

The next second, Olivia's musings were interrupted by a folder flying across her desk and scattering the papers already laying haphazardly there; she looked up to see Elliot's amused gaze staring back. He raised an eyebrow and asked, "Daydreaming again?"

Olivia shrugged, picking up the file he had tossed her and rifling through it. "Thinking about last weekend," she replied absently, one part of her brain focused on Elliot, the other on the file she was reading.

Elliot's smile widened. It had been such a perfect weekend in his mind. Being able to spend it with both Olivia and his children was like having Christmas come early. They had all been so happy; the kids had seemed so pleased to be able to include Olivia in their activities. Especially Maureen; Elliot still wasn't sure what had happened, as neither his partner nor his daughter had told him anything, but he was still so grateful that Maureen had someone to talk to. And whatever Olivia had said had worked. Maureen seemed much happier after they had talked, and, despite whatever ordeal had sent her to Olivia in the middle of the night, she seemed to enjoy spending the weekend with her family.

Family. Elliot loved his kids to death, and at one time he had loved his wife. But being able to include Olivia when he thought of family took his breath away. It was just so right. All of them eating breakfast together, spending the day in Central Park, it just felt so _right_.

He noticed Olivia's raised eyebrow and quizzical expression, and he realized he had been staring at her with a glazed-over, goofy look on his face. She smiled at him, and that grin, partly self conscious, partly pure joy, told him that they were finally on the same page; he knew that they were both thinking the same thing: how amazingly right it felt to call the other family. And neither one of them was thinking it odd that they had only technically been together for a few weeks and were already so comfortable with the idea of such a serious relationship. As far as they were concerned, it was like they had been together for almost twelve years. They already acted as family should, even if they hadn't fully let themselves _feel_ like family before now.

**XXX**

Fin stretched and looked over at the dynamic duo for the twentieth time that day. He had to keep reminding himself that Olivia was back, for real, and that it wasn't simply a dream.

He was caught, yet again, by the subtle shift in the nature of Elliot and Olivia's relationship. Something had definitely changed. He didn't want to lose that bet, but he really did think there was a possibility that Munch was right. They just seemed so much closer than they had several months ago, if that was even possible.

Elliot caught Fin looking, yet again, and offered him a smile, rather than a biting retort to stop staring at him. He could tell that the detective needed some reminder that Olivia really was here. Fin opened his mouth to speak, but was cut off by the captain, emerging from his office yet again.

"Benson, Stabler, my office!" Cragen shouted.

Elliot and Olivia looked at each other as Cragen disappeared, waiting for them to join him.

"What did you do?" Olivia asked tiredly as she stood up. This wasn't a new occurrence for them. And ninety eight percent of the time, it was Elliot's fault.

Elliot pushed back from his desk and stood up, joining Olivia by her desk, as the two tried to stall from the verbal beating they were sure was waiting for them behind that door. "Why do you assume it was me?" he replied, trying to sound indignant, but not quite able to erase the hint of a smile from his voice.

Olivia looked at him and cocked one eyebrow. "Because A, I'm me, B, I've only been back two days and I haven't even gotten cleared for field duty, and three-" she paused for a moment and her expression grew much more playful and a smirk appeared. "You're you," she finished effectively. The two of them started towards the captain's office, and Olivia spoke up again. "And did I mention I'm me?" she asked sweetly, causing Elliot, Munch, and Fin all to laugh. "Daddy would never yell at his favorite," she grinned, just making the detectives laugh harder.

**XXX**

Elliot and Olivia entered Cragen's office, still chuckling. Closing the door behind them, they each took a seat, saying nothing, but staring at the man in front of them, wondering why he had called them in there.

For a long minute, Cragen simply stared at the detectives sitting in front of him. He watched as their smiles slowly dimmed, giving way to worry and questions. He knew they were running through every scenario for why they had been called into his office, and he knew that their secret relationship was at the forefront of their minds. He smiled and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his desk, and his chin in his hands. Finally, he spoke. "Elliot…Olivia. Is there anything you want to tell me?"

Elliot gulped, and Olivia felt her pulse quicken. They were sure he knew, somehow. But neither wanted to admit it without hearing him say for certain that he was aware of their relationship.

Olivia shifted in her seat. "Whatever it was, Elliot did it," she replied, studiously avoiding Cragen's gaze.

Elliot looked over at his partner. "Hey," he complained playfully, "what happened to having each other's backs?"

Olivia looked at him straight-faced for a moment, and then raised one eyebrow. Even Cragen had to chuckle. "I believe you've just been sold out, Detective," he told the man, still chuckling.

Elliot and Olivia looked back at their captain. He was smiling and joking, which eased their fears somewhat. Surely if they had done something wrong, he would be much more serious.

Cragen looked from one to the other, and saw that they were slowly relaxing; he knew that he had scared them somewhat, and while he had enjoyed it, he decided to just move on. Part of him was a little hurt that they hadn't trusted him enough to just come out and tell him when their relationship had shifted, but he knew that the pair had been through too much in life to just trust that, once they found happiness, it would all just work out. They were both survivors; they hadn't gotten so far in life without self preservation.

He shook his head to clear it, before speaking again. "I'll put it another way," he grabbed their attention again. "Just when were you planning on telling me that you two were officially a couple?"

That statement hung in the air for several minutes. Elliot and Olivia looked at each other guiltily, with a hint of fear underneath the surface. They had talked about what would happen when the relationship came out, as they knew it would eventually. They wanted a life together, a family together, and they would not hide it as if they were ashamed.

Elliot looked at his captain. "I'll transfer," he said, resigned. He loved working with SVU as much as he hated it, and he didn't want to leave his colleagues and friends, but he knew that Olivia _needed_ to work here. And he needed what she needed.

Olivia looked over at her boyfriend, alarmed. "El, you don't have to do that," she told him. Looking back at the captain, she rushed, "I'll transfer."

Cragen smiled as the two began to speak. It wasn't a clear cut 'yes' to the question of a relationship, but he knew that their offers to transfer was as good as he would get.

Clearing his throat, he brought their attention back from where they had been arguing over who would have to leave the unit. "I don't think I asked which one of you wanted to leave," he asserted, raising his eyebrows.

Olivia looked surprised. "But you just said…" she trailed off uncertainly.

Cragen nodded. "I know that you two have become intimate," he replied, wincing a little around the last word, "but I don't think I said that required one of you to transfer."

Now both detectives were looking confused. "So, what happens now?" Elliot asked timidly.

Cragen smiled. "Just answer me one question," he started, noticing Olivia's worried expression, and the way Elliot reached out subconsciously to grab her hand and squeezed reassuringly. Internally, that smile turned into a grin. He didn't think he had anything to worry about. Clearing his throat, he continued. "How serious is this relationship?"

Elliot looked over at Olivia, and Cragen, watching closely, saw nothing but love in his eyes. Elliot spoke to Cragen, but his words were meant for Olivia. "I fully intend on marrying her someday," he replied softly.

Olivia felt her eyes tear up with that statement. She loved him, and she knew he loved her. But they hadn't been together that long, and they had never brought up the subject of forever. She smiled back, her eyes telling Elliot 'yes'. She knew he saw it there, because she wanted it seen. She was telling him that, whenever he asked, she would say yes.

It was Cragen's turn to shift uncomfortably in his chair. Those two were acting a little too intimate for him; he felt like he was intruding on a private moment, and he was loathe to interrupt, but he had called them into his office for a reason, and he wanted to continue.

When he had their attention back, even if it was somewhat reluctantly, he kept going. "I've already looked into the rules surrounding this situation…" he paused to glance from one to the other, and noticed the stiffening bodies, and the subtle clench in Elliot's jaw. He smiled. "And you'll be pleased to know that there isn't actually a specific rule that expressly forbids partners from becoming romantically involved."

Olivia stopped breathing as she felt her heart rate speed up. "There's not?" she managed to squeak out, instantly regretting it as she heard the fear over being separated from her partner in her voice. Elliot squeezed harder, rubbing circles over her leg with their entwined hands.

Cragen couldn't wipe the smile off his face. The two of them, acting like a couple the way they were, was just so cute. He could tell that they really cared about each other, and he knew that what he had told the chief was true: these two would make it work, no matter what, because they loved each other too much to ever walk away. "I read through the rules several times, and then for good measure, I talked to the Chief of D's," he replied, noticing the tension instantly return.

Elliot was surprised, and trying not to feel so upset that his captain had ratted him out to the Chief, the one person who held all the power in the NYPD, who could, and probably would, dissolve their partnership in a second if he believed it would be the better choice.

"He wasn't surprised," Cragen continued, trying to assuage the tension and alleviate his detectives' fears. Olivia seemed to relax slightly, but Elliot stayed rigid, waiting for some catch. Cragen shook his head. "I'm serious, Elliot. Chief Hamilton has no problems with the two of you dating and remaining partners, as long as your case closure rate doesn't suffer."

Olivia nodded. She understood completely, and she was certain that they could separate personal from professional, and that their work would remain as stellar as it had been for the last twelve years. Looking over at her boyfriend, she could see the muscle twitching around his jaw; he was still skeptical. Reaching over, she placed her left hand over his, which was still entangled with her right hand resting on her knee. She rubbed soothingly, and when he looked up at her, she smiled. "I don't think there's a catch, El," she said softly. Of course she would know what he had been thinking.

Cragen nodded emphatically. "I promise, that's it," he assured the pair. "Hamilton's only condition was that he be invited to the wedding."

Olivia chuckled, and even Elliot smirked at that.

Olivia stood up and stretched, turning briefly to look out the window at the squad room, she noticed something that had her turning back to her captain with a wicked gleam in her eye. A smirk adorned her face that had Cragen immediately on edge. She cleared her throat, coughing slightly. "So, what about IAB?" she asked innocently.

Elliot was immediately in tune with his partner; he stood up too, with an equally unsettling smirk. One glance out at the bull pen told him what had brought on the question, as well as what his partner was thinking.

"IAB can't do anything about it," Cragen answered cautiously, wondering just what his favorite detectives were planning on doing. "The chief has already given his OK, and it really isn't breaking any rules, so they're just shit out of luck."

Olivia's smirk turned into an evil grin. "Thanks Captain," she replied, still in that sweet voice that was completely opposite the expression. Grabbing Elliot's arm, she began to steer him out of the office.

Cragen, now getting a little worried, followed the pair into the squad room, and felt his heart drop into his stomach as he finally saw why Olivia had been asking about IAB.

Ed Tucker was standing in the middle of the room, looking impatiently around him, as if he was waiting for someone. His scowl deepened when he saw the trio exiting the captain's office. Straightening up slightly, he growled, "Finally! Do you realize how long I've been waiting here?"

Olivia half turned back to her captain, and suddenly he knew what she was going to do. He groaned internally. Of course Olivia would be all for this; she hated Ed Tucker with a passion. The relationship certainly hadn't been helped when he foolishly and outlandishly arrested her earlier that year. He knew this would create more problems than it would solve, but secretly he was proud of her. This would kick the Sergeant right where it hurt, and he couldn't do a thing about it: they weren't breaking any rules by being together, and they hadn't done anything wrong. Plus, they had the Chief's approval, so Tucker really didn't have a leg to stand on. When he saw her gaze flicker to him briefly, he nodded, resigned. She would know that, while he wished she wouldn't, he secretly approved. The two of them had an understanding that ran far deeper than any of the other detectives in the unit, other than, perhaps, her and Elliot. He looked at her as a daughter, and he liked to believe that, sometimes, she saw him as a father.

Olivia looked back at her boyfriend, who was standing just a breath away. His eyes told her that he knew what she wanted to do, and he was more than game for it. He was ready to put Ed Tucker in his place. Although he was slightly annoyed at all of the bets he knew would finally be paid up in the next five minutes.

Olivia took a step closer, and her eyes slid up his body, starting on his chest and ending in a locked stare. The heat could almost be felt as it emanated from their smoldering gaze. When she spoke, it was to the captain, though she never took her eyes off of Elliot. "So then," she drew out, the smirk still present, "it wouldn't matter if, say, I did this."

And then she was kissing Elliot like she had never kissed him before. She reached up and grabbed his shirt, pulling his face down to hers and meeting his lips desperately. Her other arm wound its way around his neck, pulling him even closer, if that was possible.

Elliot took a step forward and wound his arms around her waist, loving the feel of her in his arms.

All rational thought ended there, and both were oblivious to the whistles and cheers around them.

Ed Tucker was standing there, shocked, not sure if what he was seeing was real, or just a ploy of some kind.

Munch and Fin were both standing, shell shocked. They of course had suspected something, but when Fin had mentioned concrete proof, he hadn't imagined it would come like this.

Melinda, Alex, and Casey, who had all found themselves in the same elevator as they made their way to the squad room, heard the cheering as they walked down the hall. Throwing confused looks at each other, they sped up, and were met by complete surprise as they saw the scene in front of them. Elliot and Olivia, standing lip locked in the middle of the bull pen, barely five feet away from the rat of all rats, Ed Tucker, while the entire squad room watched.

After what seemed like an eternity, or was perhaps only a few seconds, the two detectives broke apart. Olivia looked at Elliot sheepishly. "Sorry," she mouthed, knowing that if it was up to him, they would have kept their relationship secret a while longer.

He grinned back and reached up to push a lock of hair behind her ear. "That was fun," he replied, and she knew that he was telling her not to worry about it.

Ed Tucker finally managed to find his voice. "Benson! Stabler! I hope you have a really good explanation for this!"

Olivia looked disdainfully at the sergeant in front of her. She opened her mouth to speak, but Elliot put his hand on her arm, and she deflated quickly. Even if he couldn't do anything about their relationship, he was still her superior, and she was grateful that Elliot had stopped her from saying something that she would undoubtedly regret later.

Cragen stepped forward. "Before you say something, Tucker, let me just tell you not to say anything. The Chief knows, and he has no problem with it, so neither should you."

Tucker gawped at the captain. "What about the rules!" he finally managed to get out.

Cragen smiled. "Tell me which rule explicitly states that partner's cannot become romantically involved?" he asked pleasantly. "Because I've read through them all at least four times, and I can tell you, it's not there."

Tucker looked around the room helplessly for several silent moments, and then simply turned and stormed out of the room.

Olivia couldn't help it. She started chuckling, shaking her head as she headed to her desk to pick up her bag. All in all, it had been a pretty decent day. Elliot mimicked her actions, while the entire room looked on, still waiting for something.

Once the pair had gathered all of their belongings, and with a nod to Cragen, who was still watching them with an amused, indulgent expression, they headed towards the exit.

With a nod to Alex, Casey, and Melinda, who were all staring at her somewhat accusingly-she knew they were somewhat upset with her for not mentioning this turn of events to them-Olivia grasped Elliot's left hand with her right, interlocking the fingers, and she wrapped his arm around her waist as they walked towards the doors. As Elliot pulled her closer, she called out over her shoulder as she left, "By the way Fin, you owe Munch fifty dollars."

_I hope that was light and fun. Just a little fluff, plus a stick-it to Ed Tucker, whom I absolutely hate. Updates will really slow down now, since I'm officially starting up tomorrow (well, more like today-damn it I really need to start going to bed earlier), and my semester is incredibly intense so I won't have time to sleep, let alone write, but I'll try._

_REVIEWS would really make me happy! Please? Pretty pretty please? =]_


	34. Chapter 34

**Grrrr! I really meant to keep updating, but damn school! But all my work is done (for now, anyway), so I have some time before the next wave hits.**

**Hey, totally weird observation here, but has anyone else noticed that most updates on stories happen during the week, rather than over the weekend, when most people would have more time? I just think that's strange. But maybe it's just me.**

**And one reviewer commented that most of my story has just been fluff; thank you for your review, and for the advice-I realize that, and I'm trying to spice it up a little bit now. I always appreciate the reviews you guys leave, it makes me feel so great to know that people are reading (and enjoying) this story! =]**

**OK, next chapter; enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing!**

Olivia crouched down next to Melinda, trying to keep the nausea at bay. Crime scenes normally didn't affect her this much, but she hadn't gotten a lot of sleep the night before, and that, combined with the grotesque nature of the scene in front of her, was turning her stomach.

"What have we got, Mel?" she asked, pleased to hear her voice remain neutral and strong.

Melinda looked up briefly before returning her gaze to the decomposing corpse in front of her. She was still slightly disgruntled that Olivia had kept her relationship with Elliot a secret for so long, but she understood the reasoning behind it.

"It looks to be female, approximately eighteen to twenty five years old," Melinda replied, shifting slightly as she did a cursory exam. Finally straightening up, she felt her bones creak, and she rolled her neck to loosen it as she turned around to face the detective.

"T.O.D?" Olivia questioned, averting her eyes from the body with pleasure, looking at the ME.

"Hard to say," Melinda stated, glancing back down at the body as her assistants began to put the girl in a body bag for transport back to the morgue. When the bag was zipped up, Melinda looked back up again. "Probably no more than a couple of days," she continued, noticing Olivia's look of surprise.

"Are you sure?" the detective questioned. She wasn't doubting Melinda's ability, but the body was so far decomposed, it couldn't possibly be so new.

Melinda raised her eyebrow. She knew it wasn't a slight on her, but part of her bristled nonetheless. "Lots of things can influence decomp, detective," she said, with an edge to her voice. "I'll know more when I get her back to autopsy, but I'm positive she hasn't been dead all that long."

Olivia nodded, feeling bad for second guessing the ME. As Melinda headed towards the morgue van, she felt she needed to say something to smooth over the rift she felt had come between them, ever since her relationship had come out in the open. "I'm sorry, Mel," she said quietly, hoping the woman heard her.

Melinda turned around. Looking at her friend now, she knew that that apology covered more than just the present situation. She walked back to the detective and pulled off her latex glove before resting a hand on Olivia's forearm.

"Don't worry about it, Liv," she said earnestly. "I know you had your reasons, and I even understand most of them," she paused to chuckle softly, and even Olivia managed a small grin. "You're happy, right?" Olivia nodded, and Melinda continued. "Then I'm happy for you. I'm your friend, Liv, and I want you to have whatever you want."

Olivia hugged Melinda, trying to keep the tears in. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner," she whispered.

Melinda hugged back, feeling herself choke up a bit as well. "It's all right," she reiterated.

The two broke up, and Melinda walked to the van, which was waiting for her in order to depart, and Olivia looked around, feeling slightly embarrassed at the emotional display being seen by so many of her colleagues. Luckily, only Elliot and Fin, who were taking a break from interviewing witnesses, seemed to notice anything.

Elliot glanced at Fin, who nodded slightly in understanding, before heading over to join his partner.

"Everything OK?" he asked as he drew up next to her.

Olivia smiled and nodded. "Fine," she replied softly, turning back to the dumpster behind which the body had been found, and began to poke around, looking for any evidence that had not been found yet.

Silently, Elliot joined her. He knew what that gesture meant: they were at work now, and any personal discussions would have to wait until they were off the clock.

* * *

Olivia walked, beaten, into the squad room; she sat dejectedly at her desk and rested her head in her hands, letting out a loud sigh that was somewhat muffled by her covered face.

Fin, sitting at his desk, looked over and smiled slightly. "Tired?" he asked innocently.

Olivia lifted her head for a moment to glare at her friend, before folding her arms across her desk and resting her forehead on top. Eyes closed, she groaned loudly, hoping that would be enough of an answer for the detective.

Fin chuckled and looked up as Elliot walked in. He nodded in Olivia's direction. "I hope you can fix that," he commented, grinning wryly.

Elliot looked over at his partner, and felt no desire to grin as he saw her slumped so dolefully over her desk. He walked over and crouched down so that his face was level with hers. He rested a hand lightly on her back.

"Hey," he said softly.

Olivia lifted her head slightly and looked at her partner.

Elliot internally winced when he saw the exhaustion in her eyes. Olivia had stayed with him last night, and he knew she had been up half the night comforting Maureen, who's screaming had woken the both of them up around one A.M. Olivia had insisted he stay in bed while she went to check on his daughter. He still had no idea what had happened, and it was killing him; but he respected his daughter's wishes, and all Olivia had said was that she had promised.

When Elliot had woken up again, this time around six, he was still alone. He had found Olivia in bed with Maureen; the young woman had been using his partner as a pillow. Her head was nestled against Olivia's chest, and she had had a death grip around the woman's waist.

Olivia had been squeezing back, every so often running her hand through Maureen's hair. When Elliot had opened the door, he had been shocked to see Olivia's eyes so bloodshot. She had definitely been crying, and his curiosity and anger over the possibility of her being hurt had been peaked yet again.

Looking at her now, he knew that the emotional night had caught up with her; he thought it might be best if she went home, but he knew better than to suggest it. "Are you OK?" he asked quietly, silently wiling her to tell him the truth.

Olivia smiled, or tried to. She knew what he was thinking, and while part of her was annoyed for even the silent suggestion that she go home early, she knew that he loved her, and just wanted to make sure that she was all right. "I'm fine," she replied, just as quietly. "Just a little tired."

Elliot stared into her eyes for a moment longer. Whatever he was looking for, he seemed to find it, because he nodded and stood back up. Groaning softly as he felt his back creak, he stretched out and, as he headed back around to sit at his desk, he added, "let me know…" Trailing off, he looked at his partner, and saw the recognition in her eyes. He knew she got the message, and he hoped that she would listen to him, and let him know if she felt like she really needed to go home and get some sleep.

**XXX**

"Got something," Olivia said loudly, drawing her partner out of his work as she slammed the phone down in the cradle and looked at him. "Bodega owner on 19th Street saw the girl in his store three days ago, said she seemed agitated."

Elliot started to stand up before she had even finished speaking. He grabbed his jacket from the back of his chair and reached into his desk to grab his gun.

Fin slammed his phone down next and looked at Olivia, who was preparing to head out as well. "Mel says she's got something for us, when we get a chance," he told her, adorning the customary dreamy smile that appeared whenever talked to, or thought about the ME.

Olivia nodded, smiling at the look on Fin's face. She hoped she didn't look like that whenever she talked to Elliot, but she knew that she sure as hell felt like it. "Thanks, we'll stop there on our way out," she replied, following Elliot out the door, with a quick wave behind her.

**XXX**

When Olivia caught up to Elliot, he was waiting by the elevator.

"Someone's in a hurry," Olivia commented dryly, watching as he continually pressed the down arrow, as if hoping that the more times he pressed the button, the quicker the elevator would appear.

Elliot glanced at her, but did not speak, as the doors opened at that moment; he pulled Olivia in behind him, pushing the button to the morgue on his way, and drew her into a corner, where he leaned down and gave her a desperate kiss.

Olivia moaned softly. Part of her knew she needed to pull away, but the larger part was too caught up in the moment to think of anything. "Giving-" she gasped as he deepened the kiss, before continuing, managing to get the words out in between breaths, "Arnie…quite…a show," she moaned again, referring to the security guard who monitored the cameras, and Elliot almost felt himself come undone as she gave up, and wrapped her arms around him, pulling herself even closer.

Elliot chuckled into her mouth. "Don't really care," he whispered, moving his hand lower to cup her ass.

Olivia gasped again, and Elliot took this opportunity to push his tongue in and explore the depths of her mouth.

A loud 'ding' brought both of them out of the blissful state they were fast approaching, and, while both were slightly disappointed, they secretly were glad that the elevator had stopped them before they _couldn't _stop; a few more minutes, and they really would have given Arnie a show.

Olivia chuckled wryly as she fixed her shirt, making sure she was presentable, and that no one would be able to guess what she and her partner had just been doing. "Saved by the bell," she grinned as she fixed her hair.

Elliot laughed along with her as they both exited the elevator and headed down the hall to see what the medical examiner had for them.

**XXX**

"Your victim is Alyssa Hildrige, twenty two years old," Melinda said as she saw Elliot and Olivia walk in. she walked around the body and lifted up the right arm. "She had a small tattoo right here." The ME pointed to the girl's wrist.

Elliot leaned forward, looking at what was left of the ink. "Is that important?" he asked, squinting as he tried to identify the blob.

Olivia leaned forward as well. It took her less time to decipher the drawing, and she pulled back with a smile. "Every girl knows what that is, El," she commented, throwing her gaze to Melinda. "That's a broken heart."

Elliot pulled back with confusion. Olivia chuckled and walked over to Melinda's desk, grabbing a piece of paper and a pen before heading back to her partner. As he watched, she drew first one half of the heart, making a jagged line down the middle; she added the other half, and looked back up at the detective. "The two pieces fit together. Alyssa has, or had, a boyfriend."

Elliot nodded. "Someone special, for her to get that tattoo, right?"

"And I'm guessing he's got the other half," Olivia agreed.

Melinda looked from one detective to the other; she was always in awe over how in sync they were. It was more like sharing a brain, than two separate beings. She gently laid the arm back on the table. "She died approximately three days ago," the ME continued, drawing their attention back. "It appears to be blunt force trauma." Melinda moved towards the head, and gently traced a mark along the skull. "You can see a fracture here, and this staining on the skull is from the blood."

"So what's that mean?" Elliot asked, hoping for a quick bottom line.

Melinda looked up. "She was alive when her skull was broken, detective," she stated formally, raising her eyebrows, but with a slight smirk so that he would know she understood. She did know that Elliot didn't have much patience for the science work. He was more of a 'banging heads' kind of guy.

Olivia reached over to grasp Melinda's forearm briefly in a gesture of friendship. "Thanks, Mel," she said warmly.

Melinda nodded with a smile. "I'll let you know when I get anything else," she replied, watching the two detectives practically run out the door.

Shaking her head, she got back to work.

* * *

"You're sure this was the girl?" Elliot asked, holding up the DMV picture of their victim for the bodega owner to see.

The man barely glanced at the photo before refocusing his eyes over Elliot's shoulder. "Yes, I'm sure," he replied nervously in a light accent.

Olivia and Elliot shared a glance. Both were keenly aware of the man sweating in front of them. They both noted the nervous ticks: he shifted his eyes around the room, looking anywhere except the detectives in front of him.

"And when did she come in?" Olivia asked, subtly shifting her stance so that she was more balanced. It was a reflex, one born from years of being a cop. Something was not right, and even if she didn't know what it was, her brain was preparing for a fight.

The shop owner glanced briefly at her, before looking away again. "Th-three days ago," he stuttered, reaching up to wipe the sweat off of his face.

"Do you know why she came in?" Elliot asked. He saw Olivia's preparations, and he was in the same mode. He rested his hand lightly on his waist, just inches away from his gun, ready to grab if needed.

The man just kept glancing furiously around the room. "She bought something, I don't remember what," he said.

The door opened at that moment, and the owner glanced in its direction, instantly locking on the customers who had just entered.

Olivia glanced behind her briefly, taking in the newcomers. There were two of them, and seemed to be trying to keep out of sight as much as possible. Something seemed off, but she couldn't put her finger on it.

Elliot was still speaking to the owner. He slid his card across the counter. "If you think of something…" he started.

Olivia's eyes widened. "Elliot, get down!" she yelled, throwing herself sideways into him and knocking them both to the ground as the sound of glass breaking filled the small store.

_OMG, what happened? You'll find out (hopefully) soon!_

_Cliffie! I know, I know, it's been so long since my last update! I'm incredibly upset that I have to be at school until 11pm tonight, and can't watch the premiere until later. But I bet it's great!_

_Please REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW!_


	35. Chapter 35

**Next chapter! Yea!**

**Disclaimer: nothing you recognize is mine**

Olivia's ears were buzzing. She blinked rapidly and tried to make sense of the situation. She heard Elliot groaning under her, and she momentarily panicked, thinking that she hadn't been fast enough.

The next second though, that fear was dissuaded, when Elliot opened his eyes and looked at her. She could see that he wasn't hurt, and she made a move to get up.

About halfway to her feet, Olivia was brought up short by the feel of something cold and hard pressing into the back of her head. She saw the horror in Elliot's eyes, and she knew what was behind her.

"I wouldn't do that," a cold voice said as she tried to turn her head to get a glimpse of the man behind her.

Olivia stopped trying, and instead focused on Elliot. He was trying to tell her something with his eyes, and she made a horrendous effort to calm herself so that she could read the message there.

"Get up," the voice said again, and Olivia complied, hearing the glass fall off of her clothes and to the ground as she stood up. She locked her emotions in place with an iron will, refusing to show fear or trepidation. She wouldn't give these people the satisfaction.

The show was also partly for Elliot's sake. She didn't want him to worry about her, when he himself was also in great danger.

Standing up fully, Olivia glimpsed over the destroyed counter, and saw the bodega owner lying in a pool of blood. She could tell, even from this distance, that the man was dead. She clenched her jaw in fury. He had known something about their victim, and now he could never tell them what it was. She let that anger fuel her, as she mentally prepared for what was coming.

The next second she heard another pair of feet getting closer. She kept her eyes locked on Elliot, who was still lying on the ground. He saw the anger in her gaze, as well as the determination. He silently told her to be careful, and that he would support her in whatever plan she had.

Olivia read all of that, and was grateful. Although she would feel better if she actually _had_ a plan.

Another gun entered her line of sight, and she swallowed hard, expending even more effort to keep the mask in place as she watched the second gunman train his weapon on her boyfriend.

She felt the gun pressed against the back of her head lift, at the same time a pair of hands roughly patted her down, searching for any weapons. Finding her service weapon, still in its holster at her hip, the hands yanked it out of her belt forcefully. As they continued their search, she saw the rage in Elliot's eyes, as it matched her own, feeling the unknown man take a few too many liberties in the act. She clenched her jaw, refusing to act on it, as the hands brusquely caressed her hips and butt, and then moved down one leg and back up the other. Olivia was certain that this man was fully enjoying himself.

Finally he stopped. Olivia couldn't tell what he was doing, but she saw the second man nod slightly, and the grin spread across his face.

A hand grabbed her arm, and she felt the gun against her head once again, as the man pulled her towards him forcefully.

"I'll make this simple," the voice said with a false air of compromise; for the first time, Olivia heard his accent, and the cool part of her brain identified it as Mexican. Her stomach dropped as the man continued. "You come with us, and we won't kill your partner."

Elliot's eyes widened. He didn't like the look either man was giving his girlfriend, and it didn't take a genius to figure out what they were thinking, what they wanted with Olivia. He shook his head violently. "Don't do it-" he started, before the world went black.

Olivia cried out when she saw the man hit Elliot across the face with the butt of his gun. "I'll go!" she yelled, "Just don't hurt him!"

The man behind her chuckled evilly. "Nice to know you can listen, querida," he whispered in her ear. "It'll make things so much easier for you."

The man dragged her outside, the second one following behind, his gun still at the ready, just in case. A car was sitting by the curb, and Olivia was thrown roughly into the back seat. The first man went around to the driver's side, while the second climbed in behind her. He reached under the seat and pulled out a zip tie, harshly locking her hands together behind her as the car started to move.

Olivia watched with growing trepidation as he pulled a bottle and a rag out next. Her eyes widened as she recognized it, and tried to fight briefly before the man covered her mouth with the cloth.

It didn't take long for the chloroform to work.

* * *

Elliot came around slowly. He was aware of a voice speaking in the background, and someone was shaking him roughly. He groaned loudly, and opened his eyes. Several people were crowded around him, and they all seemed to be speaking at the same time.

"I'm calling 9-1-1," one of them called out, cell phone glued to her ear.

Elliot stood up shakily and looked around the destroyed store. He noted the dead owner behind the counter, before turning back to the people standing around him, all civilians who must have heard the shots.

"Don't bother," he told the woman on the phone pulling his own out quickly and pushing speed dial number three.

Cragen picked up after two rings. "What's up, Elliot?"

Elliot took a deep breath. "Captain, we've got a huge problem. I need uni's down here now, call out all the stops."

Cragen furrowed his brow. "What's going on?" he asked, a bad feeling starting to form in the pit of his stomach.

Elliot had to steady himself again. His vision was starting to go black around the edges, and he didn't think it had anything to do with the head injury. Olivia was in danger, and he didn't have the faintest idea of where to start looking. "There's been a shooting, they took Liv. Cap, we've got to-"

All Cragen heard was 'they took Liv', and he was on his feet in an instant. "We'll be there in five minutes. Elliot, just stay where you are, fill us in when we get there."

Cragen hung up and hurried towards the door of his office, grabbing his walkie talkie on the way out.

In the bull pen, he barely stopped, calling to Munch and Fin to join him. They did so, throwing questioning gazes at each other as the three of them rushed down the hall. Their eyes widened as comprehension dawned, hearing Cragen's distress call into the walkie.

"Dispatch, this is Captain Cragen, SVU; I've got 444 at the bodega on 19th street, requesting back up and an ambulance on scene."

The walkie crackled as the voice spoke back. "Copy that Captain. What's the code?"

Cragen took a deep breath and swallowed harshly. He didn't know what had happened, but he knew it was bad. "Code 30, Detective Benson was forcefully abducted. Detective Stabler is still on scene, and may need medical assistance."

Once again, the walkie crackled. "10-4 Captain, officers and ambulance on route."

Cragen nodded, even though he knew the person couldn't see him, and clipped the walkie talkie to his belt, as he, Munch, and Fin exited the precinct, making for the nearest car at a run.

**XXX**

After Elliot hung up, he looked at the civilians around him. They were all staring at him, confused. He swallowed, and made an effort to concentrate on the here and now, and not think about his girlfriend. He ushered the men and woman out the door, speaking to them as he did. "Thank you, but this is a crime scene, I need to ask you to stand back."

As he moved them to the opposite side of the street, he saw the first of the police cars pull up. There seemed to be a lot of them coming, and he guessed that Cragen had notified dispatch; officers all around the city must have heard that one of their own was missing, and wanted to help.

He nodded to the first uniforms that walked up to him. "Close it off," he told them, nodding to the store. "No one goes in until CSU gets here."

The uniforms nodded and proceeded to tape off the storefront and the sidewalk in front of it.

Elliot turned around again and hurried forward as he saw Cragen, Munch, and Fin climbing out of their car. The three of them hurried forward, looking around the scene, and met Elliot halfway.

"What happened?" Fin beat the others to the question.

Elliot swallowed. "There were two gunmen, they came in while we were talking to the store owner." He turned around and stared at the storefront while he continued. "Liv was watching them, she must have seen something because she knocked me out of the way as they opened fire. The owner is dead." He stopped there, unable to continue.

Fin looked from him to his boss. "I'll call Melinda," he said quietly, walking back towards the car at Cragen's nod.

Cragen looked back at Elliot. The younger man was sporting a pretty impressive gash on his forehead, surrounded by an even more remarkable bruise. "Have you had that looked at yet?" he asked the detective.

Elliot stared the captain straight in the eyes. "I'm fine, Captain."

Cragen started back. He didn't believe Elliot, but he really needed to know what had happened, so he let it go. "Elliot, what happened next?" he asked gently.

Elliot took a breath to speak, but nothing came out. Munch winced in sympathy, and took a step forward. He rested a hand on the detective's shoulder.

Elliot looked at the hand, and then up at the sergeant's face. Munch said nothing, but offered up a hard smile. Elliot looked back at Cragen.

"He patted her down." Elliot clenched his jaw. "He was enjoying it a little too much. He took her gun, and said-" Elliot choked up, and Munch squeezed his shoulder. Elliot looked at him gratefully and managed to continue. "He said that if she went with them, he wouldn't hurt me," Elliot finished in a whisper.

Cragen and Munch shared a glance. They knew that the quickest way to force Olivia's compliance was to threaten her partner, and vice versa.

"What happened next?" Cragen asked.

Elliot shook his head. "The second guy knocked me out. When I came to, they were gone." He looked down, ashamed. All of this had happened, and where had he been? Lying on the ground with a gun pointed at him. He hadn't even been able to protect his partner. She had been the one doing all the protecting.

Cragen looked at his detective, concerned. He knew Elliot was blaming himself right now, and as much as he wished he could do something to change that, he knew that nothing would ease the man's guilt until Olivia was back in his arms, safe and sound, scolding him for even _thinking_ that he was to blame.

He opened his mouth to say something reassuring, but closed it after realizing that there was nothing he _could_ say. Instead, he left Munch with Elliot, and headed towards the store to take a look at the damage inside.

"We'll find her," was all Munch could say. He knew it wasn't much, it wasn't helpful, and Elliot would probably punch him, but it was all he could think of.

**XXX**

The glass windows that enclosed the cashier booth were shattered. The counter had been splintered with dozens of bullets. Cragen looked over the destroyed counter and saw the dead owner, a pool of blood surrounding his body. He had been hit by at least five bullets. Cragen shook his head. He didn't know what the man's involvement with their case was, but he doubted that this had been a coincidence. The people who had abducted Olivia, who had killed this man, had to be involved in the death of their victim, Alyssa Hildrige. They may have been the very same people who had ended her life.

The door opened, and Cragen turned around to see Melinda join him. The medical examiner silently drew level with the captain. Her somber eyes took in the scene around her, noting the damage. "Fin told me," she said quietly. "Liv's missing?"

Cragen nodded. "Two gunmen, and judging from this damage, with automatics. A couple of witnesses remember a dark car parked at the curb that left in a hurry right after the shots were heard. No license plate, just a dark colored sedan."

Cragen sighed tiredly. Their best chance to find Olivia was to solve the original case. He remembered what Elliot had said, about the one man enjoying patting Olivia down a little too much. He winced internally. He knew that Olivia was definitely an attractive woman, and he shuddered to think about what might happen before they could find her.

Melinda had a sigh of her own. She slowly walked forward towards the body, calling back over her shoulder, "I'll let you know immediately if I get anything useful."

Cragen nodded. "Thanks," he replied, heading back outside.

In the few minutes Cragen had been absent, the street outside had filled up even more. There were now no fewer than twenty uniformed officers, and what looked like an additional fifteen plainclothes detectives milling around, waiting for information. He knew most of them had worked with Olivia at some point. She had been a police officer for years, and had made a lot of friends in that time. People liked her, and he knew that those who were present at this moment that hadn't met her had heard stories, and were ready to do whatever was necessary for a fellow sister-in-blue.

Cragen made his way over to where he saw Elliot, leaning, defeated, over the hood of a patrol car. Fin and Munch stood on either side, and Cragen flashed back momentarily to another situation concerning his favorite detective, of hours in a waiting room, wanting to console but not knowing what to say. The only thing to do was hope, and that applied in this moment as well.

Alex and Casey were standing with the detectives as well. All of them, except for Elliot, looked up when Cragen joined them. He looked questioningly at the two ADA's.

Casey answered his unspoken question. "Melinda called us after Fin called her. Do you know anything?"

The woman was scared out of her mind, and it was showing. Alex was slightly more put together, but not by much.

Cragen looked to his detectives, silently asking them the same question.

Munch was the one to answer. "CSU's taking the surveillance tapes from the bank across the street back to the lab to look over. The camera in the store was broken, probably years ago."

Cragen nodded, looking around helplessly. He knew he needed to say something to the officers around him, to organize them in some way. He also needed to call the Chief of D's, to let him know what was going on.

Squaring his shoulders, he headed back to stand in front of the store, in the center of the circle of cars. The talking died out almost immediately as they all turned to look at him. He cleared his throat. "Thank you all for being here," he started, looking around the many faces that surrounded him. "And I'm sure you know what's going on. Detective Benson is missing, she was taken forcefully from this location by two gunmen. I want all the stops pulled out on this one." He stopped, taking a moment to catch his breath and gather his thoughts. "Our main priority is to find out who the perps are, and where they went." He looked around at the group one more time. "I don't need to remind you that a detective's life is on the line here. Anything you get comes straight to me."

With that, Cragen walked back to the small group standing off to the side as the officers broke up, going to work. All seemed to throw cursory glances at Elliot as they headed out.

Cragen came to a stop, and tried to think of something, but, once again, he drew a blank. It didn't matter though, for at that moment, Elliot straightened up and visibly made an effort to focus on the moment and the people around him. Cragen started when he saw just how afraid the man was; he knew it would be so, and he dreaded working with Elliot until Olivia was found, but a part of him knew that this incident would prove, once and for all, if the two detectives could have a relationship and still be partnered together.

"We'll find her," Elliot stated firmly, heading to the car with Munch and Fin following behind, looking relieved that their friend had snapped out of his state of shock and depression.

_I hope this is adding some more excitement. I have to say I'm having fun writing it! And I even sort of have a plan of where it's going!_

_What happened to Olivia? Who were those men, and what did they have to do with the victim's death?  
_

_And, FYI, those codes were all real, not made up. I looked them all up: 444 is police code for an Officer involved shooting, and Code 30 is for __Officer needs HELP - EMERGENCY! At least, according to the site I found, I hope it's right!  
_

_Please REVIEW!_


	36. Chapter 36

**Disclaimer: I own nothing, I just enjoy using Dick Wolf's characters for my own twisted pleasure.**

Olivia came around slowly. It was the sense of touch that brought her to wakefulness first. She could feel the cold, hard ground beneath her; it felt like concrete. The air was damp and moist. She could feel her hands tied behind her, the zip tie digging into her wrists. Her shoulder was twisted awkwardly underneath her, aching softly. She opened her eyes warily, looking around her for any sign of another human being.

The room looked like an empty basement. Glancing around, Olivia was able to make out a door on the opposite wall. There wasn't much in the way of lighting, simply a bare bulb that hung from the ceiling on a thin chain.

When Olivia was certain she was alone, she made to push herself up, not an easy feat with her hands tied as they were. It was at this time that she became aware of the fact that she was no longer wearing her long sleeved shirt from that morning-or was it yesterday? Olivia's sense of time was gone; she had no idea how long she had been trapped in this hole.

Taking another cursory glance around the dank area, she saw the missing piece of clothing, lying in shreds five feet away. Alarm bells went off in her head. What activity had been performed by her captors that resulted in the complete destruction of her clothing? She was slightly reassured when she glanced down and saw her jeans and tank top still in place. She felt no real pain, other than a dull throbbing in her head, and she was morbidly glad that whatever hurt she would endure had not happened yet.

The door opened while she was still struggling to right herself, and she stopped cold at the harsh laughter coming from the masked man in the entrance.

"Having trouble?" he asked sinisterly.

Olivia's heart turned to ice, before beginning to pump furiously. She recognized that voice from the store. The last time she had seen him, he had been holding a gun to her head and feeling her up through the pretense of a pat down. She narrowed her eyes, refusing to let him see her fear.

"What do you want?" she asked harshly.

The man did not answer her question, but walked closer, stopping barely a foot away, and crouched down so that he was closer to her eye level. "All in due time, detective," he replied in a sickly sweet voice that immediately had the hairs on her arm standing straight up. She did _not_ like the look he was raking all over her body.

Her jaw clenched and she continued to glare. "How does Alyssa Hildrige fit into all of this?" she asked, looking for a reaction when she mentioned their victim.

The man said nothing, but she could see the surprise in his eyes through his mask. He quickly smoothed it out, and lifted his hand to touch the small tattoo that was now visible above the neckline of her tank top, placed symbolically over her heart. He ignored her jerk back, and continued to feel his way up her shoulder and then back down, dangerously close to her breasts, always coming back to the tattoo.

"Very nice," he commented, still in that eerily sweet voice. "They're going to love it."

He said nothing more, but stood up and left the room, leaving Olivia alone with her thoughts once more.

As soon as the door closed and she heard a deadbolt lock into place, Olivia let her mask fall. She was haunted by the man's last line. She had worked sex crimes for over a decade. She heard the meaning behind his words.

Her head dropped to her chest, and she stared at her tattoo, still feeling his hands on her, touching, _enjoying_. She remembered getting that tattoo; it had been more for memory, symbolic, rather than because she liked marking her skin permanently with ink. The small phoenix bird sat over her heart, reminding her of the tough times she had been through, and how she had risen from the ashes of all of it, coming out better and stronger than before. It had been sometime after the Crewes case; she had felt herself crumbling, unable to talk to anyone about what had happened, feeling guilty for letting it impede her work, and shame that she couldn't just brush it off. She had chosen this particular symbol of rising from death because she felt that it would be a reminder that it was the bad times, the things that people just wanted to shove away and forget had ever happened, that truly showed a person's real character.

Olivia smiled, reassured, and mentally set herself to deal with whatever happened next. She wasn't going down without a fight.

**XXX**

"Do we have anything yet?" Cragen asked as he came through the doors of the precinct after a rather brutal conversation with the Chief of D's.

Fin looked up from where he was standing by the Hildrige board, no doubt looking for any clues in her murder that might lead them to those responsible, and thus lead them to Olivia. Sadly, he shook his head, and Cragen visibly drooped. He said no more, just headed into his office and shut the door behind him.

Fin looked over to Elliot, who was on his phone, talking furiously at a low volume, and Fin could not make out the words. He turned to his partner, who was also at his desk, but seemed to be glancing at Olivia's empty desk more than at the papers on his own. Fin was sadly reminded of a short time ago, when the four of them were all waiting for their fellow detective to return; at that time, however, they had at least known where the woman was, and that she was going to be all right. Now all they were faced with were dead ends and uncertainties.

Elliot slammed his phone down angrily, drawing the attention of the room. Several of them smirked; time-bomb Stabler was back. He really was a chore to work with without Olivia to temper his flame. They had all noticed how much calmer the detective had been since he and Olivia had made their relationship public, and even before, since the pair had started dating, though at the time, none of them had known the reason behind it.

Munch looked over at Elliot, while Fin merely glanced over before moving to pick up his ringing phone, praying that this call would be the one that led them to their missing comrade.

Munch pushed himself back from his desk and made his way over to Elliot. He said nothing, just leaned against the desk and looked down at the detective sympathetically.

Elliot looked up at the sergeant wearily. Any hope that the man had something died with one glance.

Munch put a hand on his colleague's shoulder and let it rest there reassuringly. A part of his brain noted irrelevantly that he seemed to be doing a lot of Olivia's job of calming 'the Hulk' down lately.

Elliot took a breath and forced himself to relax. He knew he wasn't doing anyone, especially not his partner, any good like this. Only by maintaining a clear head could he hope to be of any use. But the larger part of his brain was telling that thought to screw itself. He needed his better half back. And this was worse than when she had been in the hospital. At least then he knew what had happened. If-no, _when_-they found her, who knew what she would have had to endure.

Fin's slamming of his phone back on its cradle jarred both detective and sergeant out of their separate thoughts. He looked over at the two, as well as the captain who had just exited his office once again. "Got something," he said simply, standing up and grabbing his gun.

Munch and Elliot followed suit, and the three of them headed out the door, followed by Cragen.

It was in the elevator that Fin finally explained. "Good Samaritan saw a young woman being tossed from a dark colored sedan on 18th street. She called 9-1-1 and the hospital called us."

Fin paused for a moment and Elliot jumped in. "How exactly does this help us Fin?" he asked angrily. "We can't take on a new case now."

Fin glanced at his colleagues. "The girl's injuries are a match to Alyssa Hildrige, only this girl ain't dead yet."

It was Cragen's turn to speak up. "And how exactly does this help us find Olivia?"

Fin smiled wryly. "Because the witness got the license plate number."

_I hope you like the whole tattoo thing. I have a phoenix tattoo on my shoulder, and I really love the symbolism of the bird. I felt like it could really apply to Olivia._

_And I know it's really short, but that felt like a good place to end. And I hope you enjoy getting an update now, rather than wait another few days, just to get a longer one =]  
_

_OK, please REVIEW!_


	37. Chapter 37

**I'm not dead! I humbly apologize from the bottom of my heart for my absence of late! It's been waaaay too long. I blame school, and a complete lack of inspiration. It seems my muses jumped ship and switched to other ideas and different shows. But I'm here, and I promise, no matter how long it might seem between updates, I **_**will**_** finish this story. I won't abandon it.**

**Ok, moving on =]**

**Disclaimer: not mine, never was, never will be.**

"That's right, New York plates, Tango – Alpha – Charlie, Three – Six – Four – One. Let me know as soon as you've got something."

Fin snapped his phone shut and stepped back into the conversation his partner was having with their witness. With a 'thank you' and a nod, the detective and sergeant headed back towards their car. Munch immediately set a course for the station, while Fin was content to sit in silence and think. At least until Munch broke the companionable silence.

"TARU's gonna let us know what they get?" the sergeant asked wearily.

Fin looked over at his older partner and raised an eyebrow. "They always do," he retorted, less bite in the words than usual. This case was taking a toll on all of them.

Munch nodded, recognizing the harsh tone but ignoring it, knowing that the man was just as tired and ready for this incredibly long day to be over as he was. They all wanted Olivia back with them – _where she belonged_ – and he knew none of them would be getting any rest until that happened.

**XXX**

Cragen looked up as the detective and sergeant entered the bullpen. He could tell from one glance that they didn't get anything particularly useful or hopeful from the witness. He nodded to them, and turned back to the file he was reviewing.

Fin set his gun down on his desk and went to join the captain. He leaned against Elliot's vacant desk and waited patiently. After several minutes of silence, Cragen finally acknowledged the younger man's presence.

"Anything?" he asked softly, meeting the detective's eyes and seeing the thinly veiled pain and fear hidden there.

Fin locked gazes for a brief moment, before sighing and looking down. "We got the license plate, but that's it. TARU's running it now, no promises."

"Where's Elliot?"

Fin sighed. "At the hospital, getting the victim's statement," he supplied.

Cragen nodded, feeling the same gloom as his officers. He glanced over to Olivia's desk, feeling the tears begin to gather. He needed her back; they _all_ needed her back.

The captain's eyes slid over to Elliot's equally empty desk. The brash detective had been at wits end ever since his partner had been taken. No one blamed him, really, but they all knew that if he couldn't compartmentalize, it would spell doom for the continued partnership of the pair once his better half returned. Cragen was actually somewhat impressed that the man hadn't had a breakdown yet. He seemed to be doing quite well; though the older man suspected that the hour the detective had spent up on the roof, and the subsequent suspicious cuts on his hands when he had returned to the squad room, may have had something to do with it.

But it had not impeded his ability to work the case just yet, so Cragen was willing to let it slide. Even though, analytically, he knew that the younger man should have been taken of the case as soon as his partner had been taken; he was, without a doubt, too close to it all. They _all_ were too close; by rights, this shouldn't even _be_ a Special Victims case. But Cragen had connections, and a very good friend in the Chief of Detectives. He was able to keep his unit on point for now, but he knew that if they didn't find Olivia soon, they would very quickly find themselves forced out of the way.

He figured he had about two days before it got that bad.

**XXX**

Olivia gasped with triumph as she finally managed to extract the small tool she had been attempting to get at for almost an hour.

She then winced as her shoulder ached in protest of the angle she had to bend in order to remove the small knife from its place hidden in her boot. She allowed a small smile to grace her lips as she slowly got to work on the zip tie that was keeping her hands locked behind her back.

Several minutes and several small cuts to her hands and wrists later, and she felt more than heard the snap. She pulled her arms free with another gasp, and massaged her shoulder briefly.

That act done, she palmed the knife and contemplated her next move. She knew she needed to find a way to get out of this room and get some help.

Moving carefully, she got to her feet, giving herself time to adjust to being vertical for the first time in god knows how long. Listening carefully for any noises, she made her way to the door, gripping the knife tightly in her right hand as she put her left on the knob. Grinning slightly as she felt it give, Olivia opened the door.

**XXX**

"Marcy Grammer," Elliot began, pinning the hospital picture up next to the driver's license picture they had of Alyssa Hildrige on the board. "She was kidnapped on her way home last night near her apartment on 18th street." He glanced at the surrounding sergeant, detective, and captain, who had gathered around to hear what he had learned of the most recent victim. "Just blocks away from the bodega." He clenched his jaw briefly at the onslaught of images of Olivia with a gun to her head, Olivia being patted down, Olivia being dragged out by two well-muscled men, that suddenly crowded his mind. He turned back to the board, and focused on the map of the city that was pinned next to the pictures. The bodega, as well as Marcy's abduction and the alley where Alyssa's body had been found, were all marked. "She was knocked out and tossed into the trunk of a car. But they must not have hit her too hard, because she woke up before the car stopped. Pretended to still be out of it, but she heard everything around her; they blindfolded her, of course, but based on what the victim said, I'd guess they held her somewhere in Little Italy." He looked up again, and saw the question in their eyes.

Cragen was the one to voice it. "Why there?" he asked, not doubting his detective, but needing to hear the thought process.

Elliot looked at his captain. "She heard people speaking in what was clearly not English. She said it sounded-" he stopped briefly to look up the phrase in his notes. "'Sort of like Spanish, but not'," he read off the pad. "She thought it might have been Italian, but she couldn't be positive." He looked back up at the surrounding officers. "The two languages are very similar, I thought it was a logical conclusion."

They all stared back at him. Elliot Stabler was a 'beat your head against a wall' kind of detective. He was very good at what he did, but he wasn't the one to make logical conclusions based on facts. He was the kind of guy who went with his gut most of the time – and most of the time, that was all right, because he had a very good gut.

But most of all, they were all surprised at how levelheaded he was being, considering the fact that his partner - and love of his life - was missing. They had all witnessed how well he worked without his counterpart, but this man was a complete one eighty from the Detective Elliot Stabler that they had been working with just hours earlier.

Cragen was the first to shake himself out of it. He nodded. "You three head down there, with pictures of Olivia as well as those of the perps that TARU managed to clean up from the bank across the street. I'll send more officers to help, and I'll meet you there." He didn't wait for their nod of consent before heading back into his office.

After calling for the backup, he pulled out his cell phone and dialed the number as he made his way out of the precinct in a hurry. The Chief of Detectives had demanded immediate, frequent updates, and it looked like, finally, they might have some good news. Cragen allowed himself a small smile as that tiny bubble of hope buried itself in his chest as he practically ran down the front steps to the building. _Soon_, he thought, _soon she'll be back and chastising us for worrying so much about her._

_I hope this makes up for the long wait! I know it's kind of short, but I'm finally getting some ideas on how to bring this story to a close, and this seemed like a good place to end, so I can move on to the next part. Hopefully it'll be quicker than four months! I am soooo sorry for that! _

_And I apologize for any Manhattan geography mistakes – I might go to school on Long Island, but I don't spend that much time in the city, so I'm not that familiar with the layout._

_As always, please review!_


	38. Chapter 38

**Wow, I am so bad about updating this story. I'm so sorry! I've sort of moved away from SVU fanfiction, so I lost some inspiration in writing this. And I sort of forgot where I was taking the story for a while. But my earlier promise still stands: I **_**am**_** going to finish this. So don't worry if it seems like too long between updates, because I'm not abandoning it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything you recognize**

A loud crashing sound caused Olivia to jump slightly and hug the wall. She swiveled her head, looking for the cause of the noise. The sound of footsteps and loud voices reached her ears, though it sounded like it was at least a floor away.

She let out the breath she had been holding, and continued forward cautiously. Every door she passed, she was expecting to open, and see her captors coming back. But the hallway remained eerily silent. Outside of the small room she had been held in, she could tell the building had probably been a warehouse of some sort, once upon a time. Now, it was rundown and dirty. She glimpsed broken and boarded up windows, padlocks and chains on some doors, and at least an inch of dirt on the ground.

She tried to step as lightly as possible, afraid to stir up the rubble she was walking on, for fear that someone would be able to track her movements.

Another crash sounded, and she glanced back over her shoulder. A shout of surprise and anger wound its way through the halls, and she knew, instinctively, that the game was up. Someone had discovered the empty room, and they would bee looking for her now.

Olivia knew she couldn't wait any longer; under the sound of more running footsteps, she turned back and made her way quickly towards the exit. Or, what she thought was the exit. She really had no idea what the layout of the dilapidated building was.

Suddenly, she stopped. She heard more footsteps, but they were coming towards her this time. Glancing all around, she refused to let the bubble of panic that was lodged in her stomach rise any further. The door on her right was partially open. She quickly headed towards it and just barely managed to get herself inside and close the door again, before three men came running by.

Letting out a quiet sigh of relief, she turned to the room, and looked around. It was much like the one she had been held in, though there were a few key differences. Namely, this room had a window. _A window at street level_. Olivia moved quickly towards it, studying. The wood looked slightly rotted, and the glass was cracked in some places and warped in others. She reached out to test it, and found, much to her chagrin, that it wouldn't open. She might be able to change that, but it would take time, and she couldn't guarantee that no one would hear.

It was her only option, though, so she pulled out her small knife once more, and began to work it around the sill, trying to get out years of grime and who knows what that had caused the window to become permanently closed.

A thump outside in the hallway caused Olivia to pause, glancing over at the door. She took a deep breath, and turned back to the task at hand. She was running out of time.

She tried the window once more, and felt a small bit of joy as it gave slightly. She looked back over her shoulder, and then continued to push the window up, a centimeter at a time.

It worked, but it was much louder than she would have liked. Pausing frequently, she carefully maneuvered the window, opening it wide enough for her to squeeze through.

Putting her hands on the sill, she pulled herself up and through the open window. _So close_.

She was almost all the way through, when she heard the sound she'd been dreading: the door being forcefully slammed open.

Doing her best not to panic, Olivia moved faster. She hauled her legs out, and quickly pulled herself up on her knees. Pushing off the ground, she immediately began moving away from the building. Behind her, she heard the angry shouts as her captors filled the room she had just vacated.

Olivia stumbled, going down on one knee briefly, before pushing herself back up and continuing to run.

An arm snaked around her waist, pulling her back, and she shrieked, fighting the unwelcome grasp as a second hand clamped over her mouth.

Kicking and screaming, she was hauled bodily back inside, down the stairs, and into the same room she had just escaped from.

**XXX**

"Detective!"

Elliot turned away from yet another couple that hadn't seen anything, and looked towards the uniformed officer who was trying to get his attention.

He quickly walked over to join the young man and the woman who was standing with him.

"Officer Thompson," he addressed the uniform tersely.

The officer in question nodded once, and then turned back to his witness. "This woman might have something." He cut down any pleasantries, getting right to the point. They didn't have any time to waste.

Elliot nodded and turned to the woman. "Ma'am?" he asked, holding up the picture of Olivia. "Have you seen her?"

The woman hugged herself closer, eyes drawn to the photo. Looking back up at the man holding it, she was almost overwhelmed by the worry and fear in his eyes. Clearly, this missing person was important to him. Slowly, she shook her head. "I'm not sure if it was her," she began, feeling strangely guilty for not being able to give a positive answer. "It was about half an hour ago, I heard someone scream, and then I saw a couple of men dragging a woman into a warehouse."

"What did this woman look like?" Elliot asked, keeping a careful lock on his emotions. He couldn't afford to lose it, not now.

The witness shrugged. "White, brunette, medium height. I didn't get a very good look."

Elliot nodded. "Where was this?" he prompted.

The woman jerked her head up in the direction behind the detective. "It's an abandoned warehouse, corner of Grand and Baxter."

Turning around to face the direction she indicated, Elliot was off and running. Pulling out his walkie talkie, he radioed for Fin, Munch, and Cragen to meet him at the warehouse.

**XXX**

Olivia groaned and opened her eyes slightly. She could feel the concrete beneath her, and, looking around, recognized the same room that she had so recently escaped from.

Mentally, she took stock of herself, and was both concerned and relieved by what she found. Her head was pounding, and she could feel something wet and tacky on the side of her face, but that was the extent of her injuries. She would bet she had a concussion, but she didn't think it was that bad. As long as she didn't move too much.

The sound of the door opening focused her attention. She wasn't facing the entrance, so she couldn't see who it was, but then again, she didn't really need to.

"That wasn't smart, Detective," the cold voice said snidely.

Olivia didn't respond, and after a moment, she felt rough hands forcefully turning her so that she was lying on her back. If she had had the energy, she would have put up more of a fight. As it was, she simply swallowed, and repressed a moan.

Blinking rapidly, trying to ignore the pounding headache, she glanced over at her captor, and felt her heart rate speed up. There was no mask. She knew what that meant. Criminals generally showed their faces to their captives only when they knew it wouldn't matter in the end.

Green eyes sparkled, and the man's lips lifted into a sinister smile. "It's a good thing you're hot, _detective_, or I'd just have to-"

He cut off abruptly, and both of them looked towards the door, as a very distinct crash could be heard, followed by several bangs that could only be gunshots.

Olivia's captor glanced back down at her, and then turned and headed out the door without another word.

Olivia waited, heart beating much faster than normal. All she could do was wait. She had no idea what was going on, though the optimistic part of her brain prayed that Elliot had found her.

Everything seemed suspended in time. All she could hear were disembodied sounds, reaching her ears as low and distorted thumps and bangs. A few indistinct shouts could be heard, but she had no idea who was doing the shouting, or what they were saying. The pounding in her head increased, and she closed her eyes, desperately trying to push the pain to the back of her mind, and focus on the situation at hand. It wasn't working too well.

The bangs were getting closer, but Olivia couldn't bring herself to do anything. She just lay there, unable to move. The door opened loudly, and she flinched instinctively, but didn't open her eyes. She heard more yelling, but couldn't make out anything specific over the buzzing in her ears.

There were hands touching her, moving her, though they were much gentler than the last pair to shove her around so forcefully.

Then she felt the zip tie loosen around her wrists. She opened her eyes, and blinked at the harsh light. It felt a hundred times brighter than before, though she suspected the possible concussion might have something to do with that.

"Liv?"

The query was soft, hesitant, and full of apprehension. Olivia knew that voice. She would recognize it anywhere. She turned her head, and was able to make out a very blurry form leaning over her. She blinked again, and the image resolved a little bit. It didn't matter though. She knew who it was.

"El?" She could hear the slurred tone of voice, and she winced internally. Screw the 'possibly'. She knew she had a concussion.

Elliot smiled, and felt himself relax slightly. The blood on her face, and that tone, definitely worried him, but she knew who he was, and that was definitely something. "Yeah, it's me."

Olivia smiled, and sighed. "Hey," she whispered, closing her eyes once more.

Elliot felt his heart speed up. "Come on, Liv, stay awake for me." Olivia moaned, but made no other movement. "Please," Elliot begged, "Olivia, please, you've got to stay awake."

To his joy, Olivia opened her eyes again. "I'm fine," she replied groggily. "Just a headache."

Elliot almost snorted. His girlfriend really had understatements down to an art. "Can you sit up?" he asked, wondering if that was the right thing to ask. He knew that she really shouldn't move until cleared by paramedics, but he also knew that she would not want to stay in this room any longer. She had already been here too long.

Olivia started to nod, and then stopped as the pounding in her skull increased. "Yeah," she replied instead, but made no move to actually carry out the act.

Elliot gripped her arm with one hand, and positioned the other behind her back. Gently, he helped her sit up, trying not to wince as he saw the pain wrack through her body.

Once sitting, Olivia had to close her eyes against the dizziness that threatened to overwhelm her. Swallowing harshly, she willed herself not to throw up. It seemed to work, for the moment. Nodding once, she indicated that she was ready to continue.

Elliot understood, and stood up, pulling her with him. Once standing, he felt her tremble, and gripped her arm tighter. As soon as she seemed semi-stable, he let go briefly, to remove his jacket and wrap it around her shoulders. That task complete, he set one arm around her waist, and, making sure that she was securely tucked against him, led her outside.

_Ahhhh, that took way too long! So sorry for the delay, and thank you to all of you who have stuck with me for so long. I think I'm winding this story down, I have a general end that I'm heading towards. One or two more chapters, maybe. My original goal was to finish the story within a year, and I think that's a definite possibility, despite all my procrastination._

_As always, please REVIEW!_


	39. Chapter 39

**Once again, I am soooo sorry for the delay. I really think I need to get help for my procrastination issues. So much for finishing within a year. Oh well. As I've said before, I **_**will**_** finish this story, no matter how long it takes. **

**When I finally got around through my writers block and started writing this chapter, I actually realized I had forgotten so many details of the story, I had to go back and re-read it, just to remind myself, so that I didn't change any details, or get anything wrong. Which accounts for a small bit of the delay; but mostly, it's just my Olympic level procrastination skills.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Law and Order: SVU**

It took Elliot and Olivia much longer to get outside than it should have; the pair stopped several times, so that Olivia could rest for a moment and try to control the pounding in her head. It was only getting worse. Somewhere between the dark and dingy room below ground, and the exit, everything started spinning. It wasn't a pleasant feeling. But Olivia was nothing if not stubborn, and she refused to admit to anyone, including herself, that she couldn't make it out of that infernal warehouse under her own power.

In hindsight, perhaps not the best idea, but she was bound and determined to make it work.

Elliot, for his part, said nothing, simply holding on and guiding her out, refusing to let her fall. He didn't think he'd ever be able to let her go. This whole ordeal had really opened his eyes. Not that they hadn't been open before, but he could almost understand what people meant when they talked about an 'aha moment'. So many things made sense, and had been brought into such clarity by the events of the last few days. It was all so simple now.

Any further reflection was stopped by the sight of the exit. Elliot glanced over at Olivia, who had said nothing since they had left the room; she seemed to be putting all her energy into simply making it outside without collapsing. A feat he wholly supported.

The door was broken, hanging off its hinges, evidence of the force of their entry into the building. Elliot saw Olivia blinking at the increase in light, and his grip on her tightened. He knew she had to have a head injury, and he wasn't about to let anything happen to her.

People looked up when the pair exited the building, and smiles broke out all throughout the crowd of officers. The two detectives paid them no mind; Elliot gently but determinedly guided Olivia straight to the ambulance that was waiting behind the crowd.

Olivia leaned against the back of the ambulance as the paramedic began to examine her head wound. She winced slightly as he prodded the injury, but didn't make a sound. She was far too focused on remaining conscious.

"We've got to stop meeting like this, Detective."

Elliot glanced over at the medic who had spoken, and realized that it was the same pair that had escorted them to the hospital when Olivia had been shot.

"Eric, right?" he asked, noting the way the man seemed to glance from him, to Olivia, to the hand he was currently resting on his partner's shoulder.

The medic nodded. "Detective Stabler, good to see you again," he replied with a smile.

Olivia looked from Elliot to the paramedic, confused, though she stopped moving her head quickly when a fresh wave of pain crashed over her. She closed her eyes, trying to block out the light.

"You look much better than the last time I had you in the back of my bus," Eric continued, a hint of humor and friendliness in his voice and the smile he was wearing so easily.

Despite the concussion, Olivia finally made the connection, and understood why this man she had never seen before seemed to know exactly who she was. She refused to open her eyes, and simply crossed her arms, clutching the borrowed jacket even tighter to her frame as she sunk back into the emergency vehicle.

Elliot glanced around at the crowd, even as he continued to clasp Olivia's arm, a gentle and reassuring presence. It was at that point that he noticed Cragen, Munch, and Fin making their way quickly towards the ambulance. Seeing their worried expressions, and their fixation on him, he offered up a smile and a nod. All three seemed to visibly relax at the gesture, though none of them slowed their pace.

Olivia felt her partner's attention waver slightly, and turned her head slowly to look for the reason. Seeing her captain, and Munch and Fin, rushing towards her, she felt a small smile grace her lips. As they joined her and Elliot, she spared a moment to marvel at the family she had found with SVU.

And then the four men were surrounding her, attention fully focused, and she felt slightly self-conscious under the full power of their gazes. "I'm fine," she said, fiercely but quietly, slightly annoyed when none of them seemed to believe her, and instead turned to the EMT who was now squatting in the back of the ambulance for confirmation.

Eric didn't falter under the head of their stares, but instead shrugged and smiled. "Relatively minor concussion," he replied to the unasked question. "We'll take her to the hospital to get checked out, but I'm fairly certain she won't need to spend the night."

Olivia, who had stiffened at the mention of the hospital, relaxed slightly at the idea that she wouldn't need to be there long.

Elliot, watching her, was relieved that she wasn't arguing. He was fully prepared to put his life on the line to insist that she go with the medics, had she refused.

Cragen nodded, letting his own relief show. "We'll finish up here then," he said, speaking to Munch and Fin. "Elliot, why don't you go with them, and meet us back at the station later."

Elliot nodded, and hopped in the ambulance behind Eric, who had just finished getting Olivia settled.

With a nod, the medic closed the doors, and the ambulance was off.

_This is a really short chapter, I know. But I had an idea on how to bring the story to an end, and I felt the next bit really deserved its own chapter. So please review, and I should have the next update out within a few days._

_So, yeah… review! _


	40. Chapter 40

**Next update! Really quick too! And special thanks to Aeryn Mack, who gave me my 200****th**** review! A little guest role, for such a great review!**

**Disclaimer: still stands… not mine**

Elliot paused, looking up at the awning and reading the store name yet again, before taking a deep breath and pulling open the door.

He wasn't uncertain, just a little nervous. When he had been dating Kathy, he hadn't really been thinking much about their future… until she had told him she was pregnant. Then he had had to think. They had gotten married, a small ceremony before she had started to show, so he hadn't put that much thought into the proposal.

Thinking about Kathy was not what he wanted to be doing right now, but the memories of the beginning of their marriage almost caused Elliot to turn around and leave the store. Before he did anything, he needed to talk to his children. How could he have forgotten them, even if only for a few minutes?

Not that he thought any of them would have a problem with it, but it was the principle of the matter. They deserved to know, before anything official happened.

Maureen and Olivia had definitely gotten closer over the last few months. Ever since his eldest child had showed up at his partner's apartment in them middle of the night, the dynamic of their relationship had changed. He still wasn't sure what had happened, but he could see how much Olivia had helped. And it had only made him love her more.

He knew Katie already looked at Olivia as a sort of idol, after everything the older woman had done for her, and the twins and Eli just adored his partner. None of them would be upset, but he still wanted to talk to them.

He was doing things in this relationship that he had never considered in his first one. He tried harder with Olivia than he ever had with Kathy.

With Olivia, he wanted to do it right. And the first thing on the list was a ring.

"Can I help you find something?"

Elliot looked up, drawn out of his thoughts by the cheery saleswoman now standing in front of him, looking expectant.

He mentally shook himself, and nodded. "I'm looking for a ring," he replied, shrugging sheepishly as he stuffed his hands into his pockets.

The woman nodded, still smiling, and gestured to the display cases, as she headed back behind the counter. "I'm Eryn," she said as she walked. "And I can certainly help you with that." Eryn unlocked the case and brought out a rack that held multiple rings, in various cuts and settings. "Do you have an idea of what you're looking for?"

Elliot had followed her to the counter, and now looked down at the rings she had brought out. "Nothing really specific," he said, "But I think I'll know it when I see it."

Eryn nodded. "That's how it works, a lot of the time. Sometimes people come in knowing exactly what they want, until they see something else. Why don't you tell me a little bit about the girl? Maybe I can help steer you in the right direction."

Elliot paused for a moment, thinking. "Liv's tough. She's more into sports than shopping." His tone turned almost dreamy, as he tried to figure out how to describe the woman who had come into his life and held him captive for over a decade, without even realizing it. Eryn, listening, couldn't ignore the love in his voice even if she had wanted to. "She's not a fan of gaudy, or complex. She likes original, unique…"

He trailed off, coming back to himself with a start. He offered up a grin. "Sorry," he said, "I kind of get carried away where Liv's concerned."

Eryn shook her head. "You're in love," she assured him, smiling. "I'd be concerned if you didn't act like that. Marriage is a big step, but you seem very sure."

Elliot nodded. He knew firsthand just how big a step matrimony was.

The saleswoman must have seen some of that knowledge, because she leaned forward slightly, resting on the counter. "Have you done this before?" she asked curiously.

Elliot looked down at the rings in front of him, and spoke to them, a grim sort of twist to his mouth that relayed reluctance and acceptance. "Once," he replied quietly. "My high school girlfriend got pregnant. We made it almost twenty years before realizing that there really wasn't anything between us." He looked up, his expression suddenly earnest as he continued, "Not that I regret it, because I got five beautiful children out of it. I just wish that we had come to our senses sooner. I might have been able to spend more time with my current girlfriend if we had."

Eryn nodded understandingly. "When did you and… Liv?" Elliot nodded. "When did you and Liv meet?"

Elliot chuckled as he remembered the first case the two of them had worked together. He had been certain the inexperienced, young, female detective wouldn't even make it through one case without quitting or transferring. She had surprised him with her resilience though, and she had been quick to earn his respect. "We work together," he answered, still smiling. "NYPD. We were partnered together twelve years ago. Still going strong."

Eryn tried not to show any surprise at the length of time they had apparently known each other. "And how long have you been dating?" she asked.

Elliot shrugged. "About six months."

Eryn raised an eyebrow. "And how long have you been in love with her?" she questioned.

Elliot answered with his own eyebrow raise. "Eleven years, eleven months, three weeks."

Eryn couldn't help but laugh at that, and Elliot joined in with rueful acknowledgement.

"And her, you?" the saleswoman prodded.

"Eleven years, eleven months, two weeks," was the reply.

That brought out another round of chuckling for both of them. Elliot nodded. "It took us a while, but we finally got our acts together. We figured it out eventually."

Eryn nodded. "Better late than never." She glanced at the rings between them, and then reached down into the case, and pulled out a second rack. "Have you thought about other gems, in addition to or instead of a diamond?" she queried.

Elliot studied the new rings, noticing more colors in this rack. "I haven't," he replied. "This is the first time I've done this. With my first wife, it was a rushed ceremony, and I couldn't really afford an engagement ring at the time."

He liked this new selection better. Olivia was so vibrant, any ring he got her needed to have some color to it. He reached out to select one, an emerald set in a gold band. Almost immediately, he returned it. It just didn't feel right. He couldn't explain that, but he knew that what he had told Eryn was true: he would know the ring when he saw it.

Something in the corner of his eye distracted him, and he turned his head slightly. Shifting over to the right, he pointed to the rack, and asked for a closer look. Eryn obeyed immediately, and Elliot picked up the ring that had caught his eye.

It was simple, and yet complex in its simplicity. A small diamond was set in a white gold band, flanked by two smaller gems: blue topaz on one side, and yellow topaz on the other. Tiny swirls that formed an abstract pattern were etched in the band around the gems, and faded to a solid band halfway around.

It was perfect. The blue of the topaz almost matched his eyes, and the yellow topaz was darker than normal, just a few shades lighter than Olivia's.

Eryn held out her hand. "I'll give it a polish and get a box," she said knowingly.

Elliot looked up. He smiled, and held out the ring.

**XXX**

Soon enough, Elliot was leaving the store, the small but precious box nestled safely in the inside pocket of his jacket.

Looking around, Elliot made the decision to head to the Village. He would talk to Maureen and Katie first, and then head to Kathy's to see his younger kids.

Katie's class was just getting out when he arrived at the building. He waited until he saw the girl, talking animatedly with her friends. He felt his heart swell with pride for how far his daughter had come in the last few years.

Kathleen saw her father waiting, so she quickly said goodbye, and walked towards him. "What's up, dad?" she asked, slightly worried at her father's presence. Usually an unexpected visit wasn't good.

Elliot smiled and drew her into a hug. "How was class?" he countered, deliberately not answering her question.

Katie shrugged. "Fine," she replied, before going back to the original topic, not swayed by his attempt to change it. "What are you doing here?"

Elliot kept one arm around her shoulders as he led her in the direction of Maureen's apartment. "Is there something wrong with me wanting to see my daughters?" he asked, mock hurt.

Kathleen simply rolled her eyes in fond exasperation, and after a moment, Elliot acquiesced. "I wanted to talk to you two about something."

The younger girl looked up at her father. "Is Liv all right?" she asked, fear clear in her voice.

Elliot glanced down sharply. "Why would you think something's wrong?"

Kathleen shrugged, the weight of her father's arm keeping her from being able to raise her shoulders too high. She subconsciously leaned into his embrace. "You just seem worried about something."

Elliot squeezed her close again, in a half hug. "She's fine," he assured her. "There was an incident at work, but she's resting at home, and she'll be back to work in no time." He paused briefly, as they reached Maureen's building, and he looked down at his daughter. "That's not what I wanted to talk to you guys about though. Why don't we go up and see if your sister's in, and then I can tell you together."

Kathleen nodded, and the two of them made their way up to the fifth floor.

Luck was with them, and Maureen was there. Soon enough, the three of them were sitting awkwardly in the elder girl's shared living room. Her roommates were in class for the afternoon, so they had the apartment to themselves.

Elliot sat down on the coffee table while Maureen and Kathleen occupied the couch in front of him. They watched their father expectantly, waiting for him to explain why he felt it necessary to talk to the two of them in the middle of the afternoon, and why he had felt the need to show up unannounced.

Finally, after several minutes of silence, Elliot began to speak. "You know I loved your mother, very much, right?" They nodded, and he continued, glancing between the two of them, making sure to meet their eyes. "I will always love you two, and your brothers and sister, but your mom and I, we just don't work anymore. We haven't for a long time."

"Dad, we got this speech already," Maureen interrupted. "When you guys got divorced. Where is this going?"

Elliot took a deep breath and let it out. "I'm going to ask Olivia to marry me," he answered seriously, and somewhat shakily.

There was a moment of silence, before it was broken by two rather girly shrieks. Maureen and Kathleen launched themselves at their father, grinning broadly.

"That's so awesome, daddy!" Kathleen squealed.

"Totally," Maureen added, hugging tightly. She couldn't keep the grin off her face. If she had to admit it, this was something she had been wishing for, for years. She wasn't a naïve girl, and she knew exactly when her parents had stopped working. It had been approximately twelve years ago, when her father had come home and announced that he had a new partner. She had wanted so badly to hate Olivia for driving her parents apart, but it had been impossible. And as the years had gone by, she had seen how much her father cared for his partner, and she had started to hope for the seemingly impossible.

When the girls drew back, Elliot offered up a smile. "So you guys are OK with this?" he asked, just to be sure.

Which launched another round of squealing and hugs.

Feeling decidedly more confident, Elliot left the two girls, with explicit instructions to call the minute Olivia said yes, and headed out to Queens to have a similar conversation, with hopefully equally positive results.

If only the kids had been alone.

**XXX**

Kathy's car was in the driveway when he pulled up, and Elliot felt his stomach sink a little. They were still relatively friendly, for all the drama of divorce, but he would have preferred to do this without his wife knowing, at least not until he actually proposed.

But he couldn't put it off, so Elliot took a breath to steady himself, and made his way up to the front door.

Lizzie answered the doorbell, and smiled broadly as she threw herself at her father. "What are you doing here?" she asked, releasing him from the hug.

At that moment, Kathy came out from the kitchen to see who the visitor was. Elliot nodded at her, and then looked back at his youngest daughter. "I wanted to talk to you and your brothers for a minute." He turned back to Kathy, and spoke next to her. "Is it all right if I take them out for an hour?"

Kathy studied her ex-husband for a moment. Something was clearly on his mind, and he didn't want her to know about it. She hadn't lived with the man for twenty years without picking up some things. She nodded reluctantly. "Just an hour though," she replied a little shortly. "It's almost time for dinner."

Elliot answered her with his own nod. "Thanks," he said, as Lizzie turned and ran back into the house to collect Dickie and Eli.

With the three of them in tow, and Kathy looking on through the open door, Elliot headed back to his car, and drove to a nearby park.

They sat on a bench and watched some kids playing on the jungle gym, as Elliot once again collected his thoughts, before he began.

"I guess I don't really need to start with some speech about how much I love you guys, because you already know that. Not to mention, you got that speech pretty recently. So I guess I'll just say it: I'm going to ask Olivia to marry me."

A split second of silence, and then he was attacked with hugs for the second time that day.

Smiling, Elliot returned the affection, gripping his children tightly. It meant so much to him that they were so happy with his relationship. But then, he knew how much they loved Olivia; he doubted their reaction would be as positive if it had been a different woman.

Pulling back, Elliot surveyed the twins as he kept a grip on his youngest child, seated in his lap. Eli didn't seem to understand much of what was going on, but his attitude was joyous all the same.

"So when are you going to ask her?" Lizzie asked expectantly.

Elliot's smile widened at his youngest daughter. "Tonight," he replied. "I just wanted to talk to you kids first."

"You know you didn't have to," Dickie said quietly. "None of us would ever have a problem with it."

Elliot placed an arm around his older son, squeezing gently. "I know," he answered, an element of seriousness to his tone. "But you guys deserved to know, before anything happened." His hand stayed firmly grasped on Eli, but his arm lifted, giving Lizzie enough room to duck under the appendage and snuggle closer to her father. "I'm glad you're happy, and I really love Olivia, but you guys know that if any of you had a problem, I wouldn't go through with it."

"We know dad," Lizzie said into his side.

** XXX**

The four of them stayed there for a while longer, until Elliot realized the time, and rushed to get them back to their mother before the allotted hour was up. He once again made a promise to call, the moment it became official, and left, with the assurance of a celebratory meal that weekend.

Making his way back to Olivia's apartment, Elliot could not stop the butterflies in his stomach, or the slight urge to throw up. He had been in love with this woman for almost twelve years, and he now knew she returned the feelings for just as long. Analytically, he shouldn't be worried. He didn't think there was any doubt she'd say yes.

Except… Olivia shied away from commitment. She had been getting better, especially after they had talked it out, but he knew she needed to go slow. What if six months was moving too fast?

There wasn't any more time for reflection, however, as he reached her door at that moment. Pausing to take a deep breath, he unlocked the door and walked in.

**XXX**

It seemed that Olivia had decided to listen to the doctors. She was lying on the couch, fast asleep, when Elliot entered. He paused to smile at the sight she made, oversized NYPD shirt riding up, showing a small stretch of tanned skin between the shirt and her navy blue sweatpants. Her hair was slightly mussed, giving the impression that she had been in that position a while. One hand was tucked neatly behind her head, the other at her side, falling off the couch slightly.

She looked comfortable, so Elliot didn't wake her. Instead, he made his way quietly into the kitchen, grabbing a Chinese takeout menu off the counter and pulling out his cell phone. While this occasion probably warranted more than dinner out of a carton, it somehow felt right. They had shared many great nights over fried rice and egg rolls. He knew Olivia would appreciate the sentiment. She was never one for fancy restaurants and dresses. Nor was she big on candles and flowers. Sometimes he liked to surprise her with such an evening, but for tonight… he wanted it perfect, and for some reason, Chinese takeout felt that way.

It was the smell that woke Olivia up. It drifted into her subconscious first, and as she slowly became aware of her surroundings, she realized she wasn't alone. Elliot was taking cartons out of a bag and setting them on the table. Plates and chopsticks were already in place.

Sensing his partner's awareness, Elliot looked over and smiled. "Dinner's ready," he said softly, seeing the slight grimace as Olivia sat up, and the way her hand moved quickly to her head.

Olivia pushed the lingering pain away, and returned the smile, making her way off the couch and to the table.

The two of them sat down, and ate mostly in silence. It wasn't until the end of the meal that Elliot finally worked up the courage to move forward with his plans. He had considered, for about five seconds, asking for an empty carton to put the ring in, or trying to get a fortune cookie with the question inside it, before he discarded the ideas as stupid. Olivia would want it straightforward; she had always hated those proposals where the ring was in the cake, or where someone asked over the screen at a sports game… she blew them off as impersonal, and unoriginal. No, what Olivia would want was simple, to the point, and from his heart.

Sometimes, it was annoying being with someone who knew him so well. Olivia could tell that something was on his mind, but she had let it go until the end of dinner. Finally, though, she felt she could wait no longer.

"What's up, El?"

Elliot glanced at her in surprise. What he saw steeled his resolve, and he shifted in his seat slightly, so that he was facing her more head on. He cleared his throat, and began to speak, voice quiet and hesitant at first, but quickly gaining speed and confidence. All he had to do was look into her eyes, and he knew he would never want anything else. "I love you." Olivia raised her eyebrows, but didn't comment. "I've been in love with you for almost twelve years, and even though I couldn't admit it to myself, or anyone else, until recently, I know the feelings have been there since the beginning. No one has ever understood me as well as you, and I don't think I've ever understood anyone as well as I do you. I know, we've only technically been together a few months, but this has been building for years. You're it for me. I love you, and I never want to live without you." Elliot pulled out the small box from his pocket, and, as Olivia widened her eyes in surprise, he slowly got down on one knee, opening the box. "Olivia Benson, will you marry me?"

Silence. Olivia felt tears build up in her eyes as she moved her gaze from the ring to the man holding it, and back again. She was speechless. Did she know this was coming? Well, maybe not so soon, but she was smart. Surely she could have guessed what would be on the other end of beginning a relationship. She knew this would happen eventually. She just wasn't prepared for it tonight.

Looking back to Elliot, she was struck by the emotions in his eyes. Love, adoration, hope, pride… this list went on and on. She knew he loved her. She knew she loved him. She just wasn't used to it. And she was scared of commitment. But as she studied her boyfriend – who was slowly getting more nervous – her fears seemed to diminish. They didn't vanish completely, but when she looked at him, she knew that he spoke the truth. And if she was honest with herself – which she really couldn't afford not to be, anymore – she knew that the same was true of her. She would never want anyone or anything else. Just the man kneeling in front of her, for all eternity. There really was no other option.

Olivia smiled, and slid off of her chair to kneel in front of him. She grasped him in a tight hug, squeezing her eyes shut as she whispered in his ear, "Yes."

They could have stayed like that forever, simply basking in each other's happiness and contentment, but the doorbell chose that moment to ring.

The pair broke apart, both noting the tears in each other's eyes, and the smiles on their faces. The doorbell rang again, but both ignored it, and Elliot removed the ring from its box, grasping his fiancée's left hand and gently sliding it onto her finger.

Even after that task was complete, he didn't let go. They locked gazes, having an entire conversation without words, and when Elliot leaned forward to kiss her, it was soft, gentle, and completely perfect.

Until the doorbell rang for a third time. They broke apart once more, both feeling slightly cheated, as Olivia stood up to head back to the couch, and Elliot moved to see who was rude enough to interrupt them. With one more glance back at the love of his life, who was now sitting quite comfortably, leaning back against the cushions, watching her fiancé lovingly – a gaze he wholeheartedly returned – Elliot opened the door.

_And… chapter break! Who's at the door? I guess you'll just have to keep reading to find out! I think I'm picking up the pace a bit… I can smell the end of the story, so I'm trying to get it out before I lose the inspiration. I really think I'm close to done. Thank you to all of you who stuck with me for so long, and thank you to all of those who jumped on the train and kept going. It means so much to me, all of your reviews, and favorites, and alerts. _

_So, to sum it up: please REVIEW!_


	41. Chapter 41

**Yea, update! For what must be the hundredth time, I'm so sorry for the delay! But as I'm sitting here in the dark – power outage – there's not much else to do. it really should not be allowed to snow before Halloween =[**

**This totally could have been up earlier, but… yeah, power outage. Those of you in the Northeast US know what I'm talking about. Well, I think. I'm kind of in a bubble here in Western Mass. We've got no power, no internet, no phones… and supposedly, that's not going to change for at least another week. We totally got hammered – trees and power lines down all over the place, major roads closed down to one lane, if that. It's crazy. And getting old, really fast. I want internet! But thankfully, power's back most places around here - just not at my house. So I can actually put out this update.  
**

**Disclaimer: still stands.**

Elliot couldn't hold in the amused sigh as he opened his fiancée's door to find his four oldest children standing before him, with identical grins. He let out a breathy chuckle and shook his head, stepping back to allow them to enter.

"So?" Maureen asked giddily, smiling widely as she moved into the living room, turning around slightly to face her father.

The other kids all watched him closely as well, waiting for a response.

"So, what?"

The kids turned to see Olivia, still sitting at the table, takeout box in hand, chopsticks digging around casually as she leaned back and watched their visitors, a twinkle in her eyes as she spoke. "So nice to see you guys. Dinner? There's only enough for two, but we can share."

There was no mistaking the light sarcasm or teasing manner with which she spoke.

A squeal from Kathleen cut off anything else she might have said, however, as the girl made a leap forward, grabbing the detective's left hand and studying the ring that was visible there, with no regard for the food that suddenly went flying as Olivia lost her grip on the chopsticks.

As it was, the older woman only laughed in amusement. "Easy there, Katie. I'm gonna need that hand."

The girl didn't listen, only pulled her soon-to-be-stepmother up out of her seat, and back towards the rest of the group, where she was immediately surrounded by four very excited children, all admiring her newest jewelry addition.

"I've gotta say dad, you've got good taste," Maureen complemented, looking over her shoulder at her father, who was watching his kids' excitement with a contented smile.

"Thanks, Mo," he replied, stepping forward and moving until he was behind Olivia. He reached up to circle her shoulders with his arms in a warm embrace that the female detective immediately leaned back into, sighing happily.

This was what family felt like. Olivia had never really known what she had been missing until Elliot had come into her life. Over the years, they had definitely nursed a relationship out of the ordinary for mere partners: more than friends, less than lovers… she had never truly felt like part of his family, though she was certainly there for more major events in his kids' lives than was perhaps necessary. Since the two of them had started dating, she had noticed a subtle shift in her relationship with his children. They had liked her before, but now it seemed more intensified. Like they really wanted to think of her as their mother; not replacing Kathy, of course, but in addition to. They already knew she would do anything for them, but now it seemed more… official. They truly seemed ecstatic that she and their father were taking that next step.

Lizzie peered around her… well, she had always considered them both parents, no matter what anyone else said, and wrinkled her nose. "Really dad?" she asked, "You proposed over Chinese takeout?"

Elliot chuckled, and Olivia grinned. "It was really perfect, sweetie," she assured the young girl. "The amount of times we've bonded over Chinese… I thought it was inspired, actually."

"Whatever you say, Liv," Lizzie replied, shaking her head. She didn't understand it, but then, her dad and his partner had always operated on a different frequency. They understood each other on a much deeper level than most people who had been married fifty years. She was a smart girl, and she had been able to see the deterioration of her parent's marriage, starting twelve years ago; she had seen the gap grow as the days and months passed, as her father and his partner had gotten closer. She had never blamed Olivia, and there were times when she had wished that the detective really _was_ her mother.

"So, what are you guys doing here?" Elliot asked, still smiling as he witnessed his children's excitement. "Not that I don't love seeing you, but Lizzie, Dickie, shouldn't you be at your mom's?"

Lizzie looked up at her father, adopting an angelic look that the detective was _certain_ she had learned from his partner – it was a look he had never been able to say 'no' to. "We were excited, dad," she replied, smiling sweetly. "We asked mom if we could go out for a few hours. We promised to be back by curfew, so don't worry," her voice took on a wicked quality as her eyes sparkled. "We won't get in the way of any _celebrating_ you guys plan on doing tonight."

Olivia blushed, and Elliot grimaced. His little angel was most definitely _not_ supposed to be thinking about such things. Right?

All four kids burst out laughing, and both detectives couldn't help but fill with happiness at the sound. And especially at the sight of Maureen so at ease. Elliot really was doing a good job of not pressing that issue. He firmly believed that his oldest child would come to him when she was ready. And until then, she had Olivia.

The group moved into the living room, settling on and around the couch comfortably. The room was filled with talk and laughter, and Olivia basked in her new family. _This was what she wanted_. She already loved Elliot's kids like her own, and she was so glad that they accepted her, unconditionally.

The evening quickly disappeared, and before they knew it, the kids were back at the front door. Maureen and Kathleen promised to make sure their younger siblings made it back to their mother's – over the groans of two teenagers who insisted they were old enough to go back to Queens by themselves. Elliot silenced them with a look. He might trust his children, but it was getting late, and the streets of New York were crawling with crazies. He should know: he had arrested enough of them.

When the front door closed, leaving the apartment much quieter than it had been all evening, Elliot turned back to look at his fiancée. Olivia was wearing _that look_. Part sultry, part satisfied, completely content, with a gleam in her eyes that said 'you have ten seconds to get over here and start ripping all the clothes off my body'.

He needed no further invitation, meeting her in the middle of the room and catching her up in a kiss that was all passion. They both quickly disappeared into the act, shedding clothes as they moved blindly towards the bedroom. Not realizing the door was closed, they stopped when Olivia felt the resistance at her back. She arched her neck, her head moving back as she let out a breathless laugh, which soon turned to a moan as Elliot took the opportunity to suck at her neck. Reaching down, she groped for the doorknob, opening it and pushing backwards as she jumped up and wrapped her legs around her – fiancé didn't even begin to cover it... partner, lover, _soul mate_'s – waist.

They disappeared into the room and spent the rest of the night… _celebrating_, as his – no, _their_ – children had so eloquently put it.

It was much, much later, and the two were drifting off to sleep, cuddled under the blankets, when Elliot spoke. He absentmindedly traced his hand down Olivia's side, over her hip and around her stomach, committing every curve to memory. He fingered the slightly raised scar on her abdomen, remembering what had happened all those months ago, what had given him the courage to jump off that cliff he had been standing at the edge of for over a decade; into the unknown, he had taken that leap, ecstatic to find that Olivia had been standing right there with him. He shifted forward, pressing a soft kiss into the back of her neck. "Who do you think will notice first?" he whispered.

Olivia turned over, so that she was facing Elliot. She met his steady gaze, and matched the heat in his eyes. Her eyes twinkled as she smirked. "Whoever gets the first look at my left hand," she replied. She read the question in his eyes, and continued, "I'm not hiding this El. We're together, and it's forever. Cragen and the Chief of D's are OK with it. I refuse to take off this ring for anyone. I love you, and I want the whole world to know it."

Elliot smiled, feeling himself tear up slightly at the raw emotion she was emitting, the love in her voice. He leaned forward and captured her lips in a gentle kiss, knowing she would understand his own feelings on the matter with just that one gesture.

Nothing more needed to be said, and the two detectives happily settled down to sleep.

**XXX**

Elliot and Olivia entered the bullpen together the next morning, perfectly in sync as was usual.

The room was relatively empty, only Fin at his desk, and the Captain visible in his office.

Fin looked up and nodded a greeting, which was returned by the newcomers, before returning to his paperwork.

They all settled into a quiet morning, as the squad room filled up around them, officers coming and going. Munch arrived shortly after Elliot and Olivia, and they spent their time going over possible leads for several of their open cases.

It took almost six hours for someone to notice. Olivia was just starting to think about possible lunch options, as soon as she finished with the report she was studying.

Looking up from the paper at the sound of several people making their way into the room, she nodded a quick hello to the two ADA's and ME, and turned back to the report.

Casey and Alex immediately went to Munch and Fin and began discussing a case currently in trial. Melinda made her way to stand by Elliot and Olivia's desks, and started telling them her findings on their most recent case. Only Elliot was really paying attention, as Olivia had yet to look up from what must have been a very interesting report.

"Thanks for bringing this up, Melinda," Elliot said, once the ME was done speaking. He took the offered written report, glancing over it briefly before holding it out for his partner.

Olivia reached out with her left hand, still not looking up; she took the autopsy report and began looking it over.

A girlish, "Oh my God!" rang out from across the room, making all heads turn towards the exclamation.

Casey had been mid sentence, casually observing the room as she spoke, when she noticed the sparkle coming from a very important finger on Detective Benson's hand. She cut herself off, rushing over to grab Olivia's hand, studying the ring with a huge smile on her face. "Oh my God!" she shrieked again. "When did this happen! How did this happen? Tell me everything!"

Olivia laughed, looking around as Alex, Melinda, Munch, and Fin moved closer, looking for the source of the ADA's distraction. They all stopped, shocked, when they noticed the ring.

Alex took Olivia's hand from Casey, studying it carefully. "I approve," she said to Elliot with a razor sharp smile. She, along with Casey and Melinda nodded in unison, all agreeing that the diamond ring was truly a great find.

"So…?" Fin asked, looking at Elliot. They all had known the two of them were together, but it seemed rather soon to be taking it to this level. Though… well, when one really thought about it, the two of them had really been dancing around this thing they had for over a decade. In some ways, it had been a long time coming.

"Last night," Elliot replied, glancing at Fin before turning his gaze to his fiancée. The two shared a look that could easily have set the room on fire, though neither one would have noticed.

A loud clearing of the throat brought them back. Everyone looked up as Cragen crossed his arms. There was a smile on his face, however, which belayed any fear that he was upset. "I hear congratulations are in order," the captain said, studying his two favorite – not that he would ever admit it – detectives.

They both smiled, and Olivia nodded, holding her left hand up slightly, rubbing the new ring with her thumb. She lowered the limb after a moment, resting her hands on her desk.

Cragen smiled, uncrossing his arms and squeezing Oliiva's shoulder. Looking around at the group, he raised an eyebrow. Munch and Fin immediately returned to their desks, picking up the work where they had left off. Cragen returned to his office, still smiling. He might play hard ass sometimes, but he really was happy for those two. He had never met two people so right for each other.

"We'll celebrate tonight," Casey said, looking around at the four detectives. "Eight o'clock, O'Malleys?"

Alex and Melinda nodded, quickly followed by Fin and Munch. Elliot and Olivia looked at each other first, clearly having their own silent conversation. After a few moments, Olivia looked up at the ADA. "We'll see you there," she replied.

The two ADA's and ME nodded and exited the squad room, and the three detectives and sergeant went back to work.

_O'Malley's is a made up name. If it is actually a bar in Manhattan, I apologize to the owners.  
_

_Ok, I really think I'm winding this down now. I can conceivably finish it in one or two more chapters. It's been way too long, I know, but thank you to everyone who stuck with me through all this!_

_Please REVIEW!_


	42. Chapter 42

**Disclaimer: still not mine**

Casey and Alex were the first to arrive that evening. The two ADA's sat down at a booth towards the back, sipping their beers as they waited for their friends.

Setting her glass down on the table, Casey turned to her colleague and friend. "So how much did you win?" she asked innocently.

Alex met her gaze and raised an eyebrow. "I beg your pardon?" she replied.

Casey grinned. "Come on, don't tell me you weren't betting on when Elliot was going to ask Liv to marry him."

The blonde ADA looked down briefly, slightly embarrassed. "Thirty dollars," she answered.

Casey smirked. "Forty," she admitted, though she wasn't embarrassed at all. It really was not secret to anyone, the amount of bets that had been placed around the precinct. She knew for a fact that both Elliot and Olivia were aware of it. She wondered what the Chief of D's would do if he knew how much betting went on in the NYPD. It was a good way to make some quick cash, though; on occasion, Olivia would slip her some intel, in exchange for fifty percent of the winnings.

Alex raised her hand and waved at the entrance, and the two ADA's smiled as Melinda and Fin joined them, followed soon after by Munch.

**XXX**

Elliot and Olivia paused outside the entrance to the bar.

"How long do we have to stay?" Olivia asked, looking over at her fiancé.

Elliot turned sideways. "You don't want to celebrate?" he asked, curious.

Olivia shrugged, and grimaced. In truth, she did want to hang out with her friends, she just wasn't sure how to do so tonight, without certain questions coming up.

The pregnancy test was in her purse; it had taken a little creativity, but she had been able to slip out alone for lunch, and picked it up. She didn't want to tell Elliot until she was sure, but it looked right now like she wouldn't have a choice.

Of course, Elliot wasn't a detective for nothing. "Liv?" he asked, worried. She looked tired. Maybe they should just make excuses and go home.

Olivia met his concerned gaze and smiled, though it felt a little forced. She took a step closer to her partner, taking his hand in hers, squeezing gently as she drew him off to the side. They didn't go far, just away from the entrance of the bar.

Elliot felt his trepidation grow even further as Olivia bit her lip, looking down at the ground. "I'm late," she whispered.

It took roughly thirty seconds for Elliot to unfreeze. As soon as he did, he quickly moved forward, hugging Olivia tightly. He couldn't stop the grin from spreading.

Olivia hugged back, burrowing her face in his shoulder. "I'm guessing you're happy, then," she commented dryly.

Elliot's response was to squeeze her even tighter. Pulling back after another moment, he kept his hands on her shoulders. "How late?" he asked.

"Just a few days," Olivia replied. "I was going to take a test tonight. I know it's not that long, but I don't really want to take chances."

Elliot nodded, still smiling, and lifted one hand to touch her chin, drawing it up slightly as he closed the distance between them.

The kiss lasted longer than it should have, for two people not very comfortable with public displays of attention, but eventually, they broke apart. Olivia glanced over his shoulder to the bar entrance, where she knew their friends were already waiting for them.

Elliot silently took out his car keys, and handed them to his fiancée. Understanding, Olivia smiled and took the keys. Together, the pair made their way inside.

**XXX**

The detective duo stopped at the bar first, Elliot ordering himself a beer, and a club soda for Olivia. Drinks in hand, the two approached the table in the back, where they could see their friends waiting.

Casey raised her eyebrow, focused on the drink that Olivia set on the table as she sat down, before looking up at the detective, inquiring look on her face.

Olivia shrugged and held up the car keys. "Designated driver," she explained, flashing a quick smile at Elliot, who reached out and settled his hand on her leg, squeezing reassuringly out of sight of the rest of the group.

Most of the group seemed to accept that, though Casey still looked skeptical. She had thought her friend had been looking a little off, the last couple of days. She wouldn't say anything, though. If Olivia wanted her to know, she would say something.

Nobody else noticed anything, and they all lapsed into an evening filled with laughter and celebration. Cragen showed up ten minutes after Elliot and Olivia, but limited himself to club soda, same as his sole female detective.

It was much, much later when the group broke up, all bound for their respective homes, and the promise of a warm bed for a few hours, before the call of crime pulled them back to work once more – most likely several hours before any of them would have liked. Cragen left first, followed by Munch, who offered to take Alex home.

Casey, Elliot, and Olivia were the last to leave, after saying goodbye to Fin and Melinda, who were definitely headed back to the same apartment, no matter what they tried to pretend. The ADA captured the detective in a hug, squeezing tightly as she whispered into Olivia's ear, "I'm so happy for you, Liv."

Olivia smiled, tightening her grip on her friend. She was definitely glad to have Casey back in a professional capacity, in addition to the personal one. "Thanks, Case," she replied just as quietly.

The pair broke apart, though Casey kept her hands on Olivia's shoulders a moment longer, while Olivia's settled on the ADA's waist.

"I had a great time tonight," Casey said, still smiling. Olivia nodded, though her expression dimmed slightly as she noticed the lawyer's eyes drift down to her midsection for a brief moment, before returning to her face.

Olivia raised an eyebrow, and Casey smirked. The detective sighed and shook her head slightly. Never try to get anything past a lawyer.

Elliot interrupted the silent conversation, wrapping his arms around Olivia's stomach from behind, resting his chin on her shoulder as Casey removed her hands. Olivia drew back as well, leaning into her fiancé.

"We had a great time too, Case," Elliot said, smiling as he turned his head slightly to press a light kiss to Olivia's neck. The female detective tried not to let herself melt too much with that movement. He really had no idea what he did to her. Or maybe he did, and this was just his form of torture.

As Elliot began to draw Olivia away towards his car, she called back over her shoulder, "We'll see you tomorrow!"

Casey snorted and shook her head at the eager way the two detectives headed towards the vehicle. Yeah, she had no doubt what their plans for the rest of the evening were. Before she could stop the thought, she wondered if they would even make it back to the apartment. And that idea definitely was shudder inducing.

Smile still in place, the ADA turned her back and began to make her own way home. It was good to be back. She really had missed this group, and she was ecstatic beyond belief that those two detectives had finally pulled their heads out of their asses and realized what the rest of them had known for years now. She had never met two people more _right_ for each other. She had a feeling they were all in for a hell of a ride; Elliot and Olivia would not make things easy, but she also knew they wouldn't quit. The sparks between them could cause fire or fireworks, but in the end, the only thing that mattered was that they loved each other. They were together because they _wanted_ to be together. And she knew that, no matter what, they wouldn't forget that.

And if nothing else, it certainly would be interesting to watch.

_Yeah, it's a little short, I'm sorry. This is sort of a little filler chapter. I was planning on just ending it with an epilogue, but after looking at the jump from chapter 41 to the epilogue, it really just felt too choppy. So I came up with this. I hope it satisfies. Just the epilogue to go, and that will most likely be up by the end of the weekend. Thank you all for sticking with me so long, and through months of dry spells. I appreciate all the support through reviews, favorites, alerts, and just anyone who just read this story._

_Please review!_


	43. Epilogue

**Last chapter! I know it might seem sort of abrupt, but I've been working on this story for over a year, and it really wasn't supposed to be this long in the first place. It's really time to end it. Thank you to all my readers, thank you for sticking with me all this time.**

**And yes, I know Olivia is a little old to be pregnant, but we don't really have an exact age. Yes, she's over forty, but that's not that bad. My grandmother was 45 when she had my dad, my mom was almost forty when she had me… so yes, I realize that she's not exactly **_**young**_**, but she's put off starting a family in favor of her career, and now she's getting a chance at both. I apologize if that offends anyone.**

**Disclaimer: don't own**

_Five months later…_

"You ready?"

Olivia turned around, smile widening as she nodded. Cragen moved further into the room, unable to keep stop his own smile, or the few tears that escaped, as he observed the woman in front of him. Olivia was dressed simply, but elegantly, in a spaghetti strap, pleated white dress that accentuated her chest, flaring out from a knot settled right under her breasts, cutting off at the knees. Her shoes had barely any heel to them, and a short veil was attached to the barrette that effectively held half of her hair up in an uncomplicated hairdo.

Olivia had never been one to plan every wedding detail growing up; she had been more concerned with dealing with her mother. But she always knew she wanted to be married on a beach. She also knew she wanted it simple, and thankfully, Elliot had agreed; so with the exception of Chief Hamilton – who had insisted on an invitation, and neither detective was willing to defy him – the guests consisted only of those whom they considered family: Elliot's children, Fin, Munch, Cragen, Alex, Casey, and Melinda.

Olivia turned slightly, picking up her bouquet of lilies, and looked back at the man she considered the closest thing to a father she would ever know. "Thank you, for doing this," she said, as she walked forward.

Don nodded, holding out his arm, which she linked with hers, and the two began walking towards the small group waiting for them. He had been incredibly humbled when she had asked him to walk her down the aisle – not that there really was an aisle, but the principle was the same.

Elliot couldn't help but gasp as he watched his soon-to-be wife walk towards him. She looked so beautiful, and she was all his. His face lit up, and he watched hers do the same, their eyes locking and emitting an almost tangible heat of burning passion. No one could mistake the love in their gazes.

Olivia let go of Don's arm, handing her bouquet to Maureen, who took it with a watery smile, as the detective turned to look at her almost-husband.

The priest took a moment to look around at the small group, before he began. "We are gathered here, today, to join two souls in the sacred bond of matrimony. Elliot and Olivia have chosen to write their own vows, being of the belief that only they can truly say how they feel. Elliot?"

Elliot smiled. "Twelve years, eight months, eleven days ago, I went to work to find I had been given a new partner. She was a stubborn, hard-headed, badass, and I was so sure she wouldn't last more than a week. Twelve years, eight months, two days ago, I started to fall in love. I was married, had a family, but I couldn't help myself. Olivia, it barely took a week for you to become my reason for waking up every morning, my reason for going to work, my reason for _breathing_. It may have taken us twelve years to get to where we are, but we did it. And I don't need tealeaves or a crystal ball to know that what we have is real. 'Till death do us part. And I promise you that, forever."

They all had tears in their eyes by the end of Elliot's vow. The priest turned slightly. "Olivia?"

Olivia took a deep breath, gaze still locked with Elliot, as she smiled. "In all my life, I never thought I would be so lucky, as to fall in love with my best friend. For twelve years, we've worked together, side by side, every day; and for eleven years, I watched you go home to another life, though it killed me inside. This last year has been like a dream, and I don't ever want to wake up. You've included me in your family, and that's something I never really had a chance to experience before. I love you, El, I have since the moment you stopped being a jerk about having to deal with a female partner." There was a collective chuckle at that. "It won't be easy, and there will be times – more times – when we want to kill each other, but it'll be all right. Because when you find the person you're meant to be with, none of that matters. Forever and always, Elliot Stabler. You're stuck with me."

They all laughed again, and the priest waited until it died down before continuing. "Elliot Stabler, do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live?"

"I do," Elliot replied, smiling down at his partner.

The priest nodded, and turned to Olivia. "Olivia Benson, do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live?"

"I do," Olivia responded, grinning through the tears.

With a nod, the priest looked to the two standing closest to the couple. Elliot turned around and took the ring from Dickie, his best man. When he turned back, the priest kept speaking. "Elliot, will you place the ring on Olivia's finger, and repeat after me: with this ring, I thee wed."

Elliot complied, and when the ring was in place, he held onto her hand, squeezing tightly for a moment longer, before Olivia let go, turning around to take the ring from Maureen, her maid of honor. She repeated after the priest, and before she knew it, he was saying the words she had been waiting months for: "By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride."

Needing no further encouragement, Elliot leaned down and captured Olivia's lips in a gentle and loving kiss. It continued past what some might consider 'appropriate' in their present company, but the second their lips touched, the world seemed to disappear around them.

The kiss lasted almost a full minute, before the pair broke apart, to find twelve sets of eyes watching them, expressions ranging from pleasantly amused, to full-on grins, to familial pride.

The next few minutes were full of congratulations, and the group began making their way back to their cars. For such a small wedding, they had planned an equally small reception; it really wasn't even that, just a room rented out at a nice restaurant with a live band, good food, and each other's company.

**XXX**

Olivia sighed contentedly as she leaned in to her husband, swaying in time to the music. This whole day had been perfect.

"Happy?" Elliot asked, resting his chin on top of her head as they danced.

"Mmhmm," Olivia breathed, closing her eyes as she smiled. She would never get tired of just how _right_ it felt, being in Elliot's arms.

The two continued to move, oblivious to the small group around them, all watching with smiles on their faces. Fin and Melinda moved out to the dance floor, their faces the same mask of contentment as the newly married couple. Casey offered her hand to Dickie, while Munch made the same offer to Maureen, and Cragen to Kathleen. Lizzie picked Eli up and brought him out onto the dance floor, Alex following; the two swung the youngest child around, smiling at his delighted cries.

Elliot looked around at his children, feeling the warmth bubble in his chest at the sight. Everyone was happy. He felt Olivia grimace a little, and looked down in concern. "What's wrong?" he asked, suddenly worried.

Olivia looked up, smiling at his concern, alleviating most of his fears. "I'm fine," she assured him, resting a hand over her almost six month baby bump. "I think someone just wants to say hi to daddy."

Elliot grinned, resting his hand over hers, feeling the flutters and marveling at the tiny life form growing there. That feeling never got old. "Are you sure you're not too tired? We could sit down."

Olivia shook her head. "Really, El, I just want to dance with my husband tonight."

Elliot nodded, understanding, and pulled her close again.

Both detectives relaxed in each other's company. It had taken a long time to get to where they were, but they had made it, against all odds. Not to say that the hard part was over, not by a long shot. Elliot and Olivia were way too similar for that. They were stubborn, and pigheaded, and obstinate. At times, they would want to kill each other. But both knew that they would never want anything easier. After all, it's not worth winning if you don't have to fight for it.

_So I think on an episode of Rescue Me, I learned that it's a sin for the Catholic church to marry people outside, but this is how I saw the wedding, so I'm sorry if I offended anyone. I'm Jewish, so I don't really know anything about the Catholic faith._

_Once again, thank you to all my readers and reviewers. You guys are what made me buckle down and finish this._


End file.
